


How Much is that Turtle in the Window

by Zelgadis55



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012)
Genre: Abuse, Bradford wants revenge, Cruelty, Hurt Michelangelo (TMNT), Michelangelo (TMNT)-centric, Mikey is captured, Mind Manipulation, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Other, Rape/Non-con Elements, TMNT, Turtles, Violence, and Shredder allows it, not graphic, pet trope
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:02:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 99,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24382507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zelgadis55/pseuds/Zelgadis55
Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.
Comments: 267
Kudos: 167





	1. Chapter 1 - Sentenced

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I have been working on this story since February last year (2019) and so far, have written well in excess of 176k words for it and I'm probably only about 2/3rds of the way through the story. A couple of weeks ago, I went and sorted most of it into chapters and though I'm not done yet, I currently have 33 chapters. Suffice it to say, this one is long. It may be based on a familiar trope but I like to think I've done things differently (at least, I've never read anything like this tale) so I hope you will give it a chance. 
> 
> One thing I need to do is give a shoutout to Athese (ffnet)/Arithese (AO3). I was inspired for this story by a scene in one of her old stories and it just would not leave me alone. I sat on the vague idea for about 3 weeks, then one hot night when I couldn't sleep, it came back into my head and started circling. I realised who the villain was and therefore which universe and everything immediately fell into place. Over 2 hours later, I gave up trying to sleep and started frenetically writing. I've barely looked back since, nor to any of my other stories. You can blame this (among other real-life garbage) for the exceedingly slow updates on my 'AOtGO' multiverse. >_>
> 
> Whelp! Not entirely sure I should start posting this yet but here goes!

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 1

“Ah, you are awake at last, turtle.”

Moaning in pain and bewilderment at hearing the deep, menacing voice far too close for his liking, Mikey struggled to open his eyes. Man, but his head hurt. And his shell, his stomach, his liver, his... everything. Everything hurt. Even his teeth and eyeballs. A sudden excruciating twist of his arm had him gasping in pain and crying out, his eye flying open all the way. The other was so badly swollen he could barely see out of it. Ignoring the pain, he whipped his head around, trying to work out what was going on when he saw Dogpound's maliciously grinning form towering over him, looking delighted and mean. That was when he remembered. He'd been starving and since there was almost no food left in the lair other than cereal, fruit and ramen, he'd snuck out after curfew to get a late-night snack. As he'd been about to return home, full and feeling sleepy at last, Dogpound had appeared and taken him by surprise. He'd been badly outnumbered so he tried to run but he'd been taken down regardless. Far too fast for his liking.

Mikey tried frantically to struggle free but his hands were chained tightly behind him and from the little movement he had, connected to his ankles. It was impossible to run. Or even walk for that matter. An evil laugh that sent a shudder down his spine boomed across the room and his head still spinning, he turned to stare up at the Shredder in terror, realising that that was who had spoken. 'No! Nonononono, no!' he quailed internally. This couldn't be happening! It just couldn't! He'd only gone out for a snack and it had been quiet the last few days thanks to the weather so how had this happened? Since he didn't have anyone to bounce off of he'd been quiet for once and he'd made it a point to stick to the shadows so how?

“You've actually done something right for a change, Bradford, bringing me this rare gift.”

He shuddered at the sound of the pleased smile in the Shredder's voice.

Dogpound bowed respectfully. “Master.”

Shredder turned his dread gaze on Mikey, making him sink back in a fruitless effort to get away. “Do you have anything to say, Turtle?” he asked, laughing darkly as his eye bore into him.

Mikey felt sick. His stomach churned in terror but he jut his chin out and glared defiantly. “My brothers will come for me!”

“Oh, I fully agree,” Shredder all but purred in satisfaction, “and since this will be the first place they look, you will just have to be shipped elsewhere. Bradford, make arrangements to ship it to the Foot Compound in Japan where it will never be found again. You'll be joining it to make sure it gets there safely.”  
  
“At once, Master Shredder,” Dogpound replied in satisfaction, bowing deeply again.

Mikey gasped in horror. No! If they sent him there, his family would never find him. “You can't do this!” he yelled desperately.

“On the contrary, you reptilian freak, I can do as I like,” Shredder smiled nastily. Then he turned to Bradford, fixing his unnerving, scarred visage on the former human. “The next time I see either of you, I want it cowed and obedient. Have it trained like the mongrel it is.”

“With pleasure, Master,” Bradford growled menacingly. He gave Mikey a triumphant look, filling him with dread before turning to the Foot Soldiers holding him firmly in place. Not that he could have gotten very far, being chained hand to foot like this. “Bring him to the dungeons.”

As he was lifted into the air, Mikey yelled, struggling valiantly to be free and was dropped headfirst onto the ground for his efforts. “C-come on, d-dudes,” he stuttered painfully as the faceless soldiers simply picked him up again, “y-you d-don't really want to d-do this, do you?” he begged. There was no reply other than to step into a darkened corridor and begin descending down a steep staircase, carrying him so his head angled down. Mikey swallowed as nausea took hold again. This really wasn't doing much for his head, what with everything swaying in and out of his vision and the dizzying movement. “Y-you don't really want to be the type of soldiers who follow orders blindly, do you?”

Still nothing. So Mikey tried again. He had no hope of getting out of this by himself but if he could buy time for his brothers to find him, it would be worth any ire he attracted.

“Are y-you seriously saying, dudes, that if the Shredder or Dogbreath here told you to jump off a bridge, you'd do it?” He shivered. It was so cold and he felt so sick. Just how badly did he get injured anyway? He didn't know and wasn't sure he wanted to. “Would you run over the edge screaming, Shredder forever or something stupid? Like you were in some lame-o movie?”

Suddenly, a large hand wrapped tightly around his neck, cutting off his breath and Dogpound snarled, hot air blowing in his face, “I suggest you shut that big mouth of yours, you pathetic little mongrel, before we shut it for you permanently! Do you understand me?”

Mikey nodded frantically, desperate, wheezing noises being the only sound he could make. Satisfied, Bradford released him and Mikey glared up at the former man, sticking his tongue out at him once his back was turned. He had no intention of keeping quiet, being annoying was his greatest talent but right now, after being choked like that, he couldn't talk even if he wanted to. He needed to get his breath and sense of balance back again first and to do that, he needed to close his eyes because he couldn't do that with everything continuously swirling around him.

Unfortunately, closing his eyes wasn't much better, he could still feel the swaying and bumpy movement and more than once, a part of his body thumped into the walls as the soldiers manhandling him turned around the curve of the stairs but far too quickly, his body levelled out and he realised they'd reached the bottom. The dungeons. The Foot Soldiers holding him dropped him painfully onto the ground, crushing his hands beneath him and causing him to yelp. Apprehensively, he opened his eyes again, only to see he was in a torture chamber surrounded by cells and shackles hanging from the walls.

“Get Stockman,” Dogpound snarled at a nearby guard.

Mikey saw the guard bow slightly before running off, silent as death and he struggled again, testing the strength of the chains but to no avail. Thankfully, Bradford didn't even look at him. Mikey rocked and rolled to his knees then looked around in terror, wondering why they were down here when Shredder had demanded he be sent away. Why, oh why had he snuck out? He should have just had a piece of fruit or a bowl of cereal instead of going out for pizza. At least he left a note just in case one of his brothers woke up and found him missing but what if they didn't and no one found it in time? He was so screwed!  
  
Dogpound turned and smirked at him, causing Mikey to freeze up, then he about-faced, walking over to a forge and firing it up. Just then, a shuffling sound drew his attention and he turned to see a nervous Baxter Stockman enter the room.

“What took you so long?” Dogpound barked furiously. “We're on a timetable here!”

“S-sorry, sir, I-I was sleeping.”

“No excuses!” Dogpound growled, backhanding the hapless scientist and knocking him into the wall. Mikey winced, glad it wasn't him before remembering he was in a far worse situation. At least Stockman wasn't chained and completely helpless the way he was. He grit his teeth and tried to struggle free again.  
  
“W-what did you need me for, sir?” Stockman stuttered timidly as he picked himself up.

“We have a new guest who needs to be collared like the mongrel he is and branded as Foot property,” Bradford purred, turning to watch Mikey as he spoke, a pleased smirk lighting his furred face.

“W-what?” Mikey gasped in disbelief. But... but he wasn't property, they couldn't do this! His gaze fearfully flickered to the now blazing forge. Dogpound picked up a long pole with something on the end and inserted it into the fire where he let it lay. He'd seen enough movies and played enough games to know a branding iron when he saw one and he felt the terror rise even more.

“Uh... no offence, Mr Bradford, sir b-but... why do you need me? I'm a sci-scientist! Not a torturer!” Stockman argued, glancing over at Mikey and sneering before returning his frightened gaze to Dogpound

“You are to fit him with a metal dog collar and make sure it cannot be removed. The lock must be unpickable!

“Seriously, dude, you can't do this!” Mikey yelled in fright. They couldn't! It was inhumane! Surely not even Chris Bradford could be that cruel.

“You turned me into a dog, it's only fitting that I return the favour,” Bradford snarled, glaring daggers at him. Mikey was glad the former man was across the room. He was sure it was the only thing that stopped him being kicked again.

“But that... that wasn't my fault!” he cried desperately. “You did that to yourself! We tried to warn you about the mutagen but you attacked anyway!” Mikey struggled all the harder, causing the cuffs from the manacles to cut painfully into his wrists and ankles. He had to get away! But... he was chained too tightly. He couldn't even have crab-walked away.

“I have just the thing,” Stockman mused thoughtfully, his fear seemingly dissipating as his mind worked on the problem given him. He came over to measure the circumference of Mikey's neck before inspecting the pre-formed collars hanging on a wall near the forge. “Hmm, the fit may be a little tight but this one will work, that or you can get a blacksmith to construct one that fits the turtle properly.”

“No time,” Dogpound growled impatiently, fixing Stockman with a glare. “Long as it's not so tight it kills the mongrel, it'll do. As I said, we're on a tight timetable before the mongrel's family comes looking for him.”

Mikey perked up slightly at the reminder of his family, then despaired as he realised they were rushing him out after... he gulped, his gaze flickering unbidden back to the forge that was uncomfortably close. He could feel the heat even from here, across the room by the stairs where he'd been dropped.

Holding a rough-looking metal circle in his hands, Stockman strode towards Mikey, slowing nervously as he came close. He peeked up at the nearby guards and with a movement that suggested a rolling of the eyes, the guards moved in to hold Mikey firmly in place. Stockman swallowed and crouched down in front of him, reaching out with the metal collar. Mikey's eyes grew wide and he shifted desperately in place, trying to keep out of reach. To make his neck inaccessible. Before he could withdraw it into his shell, however, one of the soldiers grabbed hold of it cruelly, holding him in place as Stockman opened the metal circle wide, clasping it around his neck and locking it in place. It hugged his throat with barely a millimetre gap, leaving him unable to swallow properly.

“Please,” he begged desperately. “It's too tight, I can barely breathe.”

“Put the turtle face down on the table and keep its head still,” Stockman commanded, getting up and walking across the room again.

To his terror, Mikey was picked up off the ground and carried to the table where he was forced down on his plastron. His chains were partially loosened, allowing him to straighten his legs at last and make a run for it, if only he wasn't being held firm. Then the cuff around one wrist was removed and despite his attempt to punch his way free, both were yanked painfully down the side of the table and clamped in place.

“What are you doing, Stockman?” Dogpound demanded, watching the timid human across the room. Fighting back tears of terror and pain, Mikey managed to look up to see the scientist mixing something in a small bowl.

“You wanted the collar to be impossible to pick so I'm mixing a hard, fast-setting resin to fill the lock. That collar will never be coming off again. Even trying to cut it off, given that it's flush with his skin, will do more damage to the turtle than it would be worth,” Stockman smirked, his previous fear forgotten.

“No! Don't!” Mikey screamed. “Let me go! Don't do this!” he begged as Stockman came over and poured the liquid resin into the lock of the collar at the back of his neck. But Mikey knew, even if Stockman wasn't more afraid of his current employers, he hated him and his brothers and as far as he was concerned, this was well-deserved payback. It was all Mikey could do not to sob at the sheer unfairness of the situation.

“Keep holding the turtle still while it sets. You can release him in fifteen minutes,” Stockman instructed, turning away to dispose of the remains of his mixture.

Mikey stared down at the floor, his heart pounding and his chest heaving, unable to move as two soldiers continued to hold his head in place. He guessed it was so he didn't try to turn and spill the resin before it set. He tried all the harder and was cuffed in the head for his efforts.

“I am so going to enjoy causing you just a fraction of the pain you've caused me, freak.”

“You're... you're insane,” Mikey gasped, desperately.

Bradford smiled and it was a nasty sight. “The brand should be hot enough by now. May as well take the chance to brand you while you're tied down,” he chuckled darkly.

Mikey's eyes shot up in panic as he tried again to twist his head to look as his tormentor. “No! Come on, dude! It's not my fault you're an evil minion and that you mutated yourself!”

Bradford growled. He backhanded Mikey viciously across the face, making him see stars again as his ears rang.

“Dogs don't talk, Michelangelo, so much as I enjoy hearing you screaming and begging, I suggest you shut up and be silent!”

“You're- you're a dog and you talk,” Mikey retorted shakily. Anything to distract the mutant from his task and buy more time for his brothers to find and rescue him. He cringed at the thought. His brothers probably didn't even know he was gone yet but as soon as they woke up and found the note and realised he wasn't back, they'd come looking. Trouble was, he didn't even know how long he'd been unconscious for before waking up in Shredder's throne room and if it was daytime already...

He was so, so screwed!

“I hear there're two ways to deal with noisy dogs. The first is removing their voice boxes.”

They wouldn't! Mikey gasped in terror, cringing back as far as the chains and Foot Soldiers holding him would allow.

“Unfortunately, we don't have time for that since the longer we delay, the more chance of your pathetic brothers turning up there is,” Bradford mused thoughtfully and making Mikey sigh in relief. Dogpound's grin turned wicked. “Besides, Master Shredder wants you trained, therefore, we'll have to go with option number two, training you not to speak. Stockman, design the mongrel another collar that'll shock it every time it speaks.”

Mikey's eyes boggled and he gasped for breath that was hard to come by. The collar he was already wearing was far too tight.

“It'll take me half a day to make something sturdy enough to last,” Stockman warned. “A day if you want something more than just the basics.”

“I told you we don't have the time for that!” Bradford snarled, making Stockman cringe in fear again. “I have to take him away from here within the hour!”

“Where... where are you taking him?” Stockman stuttered.

'Yeah, where are you taking me?' Mikey thought, faint from pain, fear and lack of sufficient breath.

“Shipping container,” Bradford grunted dismissively as he stalked out of Mikey's sight, “and from there, he'll be shipped by boat to Japan and Foot headquarters. So he needs to be kept quiet so he can't attract attention!”

“When does the ship leave?”

“Don't know yet. I still have to arrange it,” Bradford admitted. “If there isn't one leaving New York within the next couple of days, I'll have to consider ships leaving from ports in other cities.”

“Then... might I suggest you gag and muzzle him for now and I'll make the collar before you ship the turtle out. But either way, you'll have to make sure he can't undo the muzzle or later the collar once it's attached.”

“That won't be a problem,” Dogpound growled, sounding all too pleased with himself.

'What does that mean?' Mikey whined, still staring ahead at the place where he lost sight of Dogpound as best he could; it was hard with the collar so tight and limiting his movement, not to mention the Foot soldiers continuing to hold him in place. His heart racing wildly in his chest, he continued shaking as the two evil minions discussed his immediate future out of his sight. He couldn't help but whimper as he suddenly felt Dogpound's presence at his left again.

“Hold the mongrel's arm still,” he ordered. Mikey's head was immediately released and it dropped, the wide collar digging into his neck at the unexpected movement. He gasped and choked for breath.

“Mongrel?” Stockman questioned curiously.

“It's a mixed breed of turtle and human, isn't it?” Dogpound countered. “At any rate, Shredder wants it treated and trained as one and I couldn't be happier with the idea,” Bradford smirked as both soldiers took hold of Mikey's arm, holding it painfully tight. He tried to wrench free. He tried to fight but to no avail. He couldn't budge in the slightest.

Suddenly a searing pain shot into his upper arm, just below the shoulder and he screamed in agony as the smell of burning flesh reached his nostrils.

“Now you are marked forever as property of the Foot,” Bradford sneered as he stepped in front of a panting Mikey, holding the red glowing brand of the Foot symbol in front of his eyes. “Treat the burn, Stockman, I don't want it getting infected. If Master Shredder's new pet dies or loses an arm, _you_ will take his place.”

As the evil scientist began working on his burnt flesh, being none too gentle in the process, the pain became too much and Mikey's eyes rolled up in the back of his head.

-:-


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also, see other warnings.  
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.  
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU. 
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window?**

ch 2

Moaning in agony, Mikey carefully peeled his eyelids open, blinking away the grittiness left by long dried tears. Then he blinked again. Wherever he was was pitch black and he couldn't see a thing, no matter how hard he squinted or tried. He lifted his head painfully, wincing due to the constrictive collar clamped around his throat and tried uselessly to work his jaw, feeling something tight and painful digging into the sides of his face and up to the back of his head. His eyes widened in terror as his hands shot up to his face, vaguely recalling Stockman suggesting to muzzle him. Then he cried out in pain as the terrible burn on his arm pulled excruciatingly and his hands smashed solidly into his face in his panic.

For several minutes, Mikey lay there gasping and panting in agony, trying desperately to get enough air in through his nose with the obstacles blocking his mouth and squeezing his throat. Eventually, once he didn't feel like he'd collapse from lack of air, he gingerly reached for his face again, intending to follow the straps to where they were tied or buckled and remove the offending device but to his further horror, he discovered he couldn't feel his fingers against his skin. Hell, he couldn't really feel them period, he realised as he frantically and unsuccessfully tried to flex them.

Mikey whimpered again in discomfort as he carefully rubbed his still chained hands against his leg, trying to feel his fingers as he thought that maybe his face was just too numb from the straps cruelly digging into it. He stilled at the vaguely familiar rough sensation against his legs and shook, wishing he could at least see something, anything!

He needed to know exactly what they'd done to him while he'd been unconscious but how could he when he couldn't see or feel properly?

Unlike the rest of his body, there was no pain in his fingers or hands, only the numbness of pins and needles from not having moved them in probably hours. Figuring it unimportant, Mikey dismissed that thought and returned to rubbing his hands lightly against his bruised legs, concentrating on the odd sensation again. He knew it from somewhere but couldn't understand just why he felt it now of all times. Several minutes later, he finally realised he recognised that slightly rough texture, from back when he'd broken his wrist after landing wrong while doing handsprings a few years ago. Donnie and his father had been forced to encase his wrist in plaster to help the bones heal and that's what he was sure he felt now around his hands but it didn't make any sense. As badly injured as he'd been upon being captured, he was sure nothing had been broken and even if it was, he doubted very much the Foot would care enough to treat the break unless it was likely to kill him if they didn't. The one thing he could be sure of after all, was that both Dogpound and The Shredder wanted him alive. He shuddered involuntarily at the terrifying thought.

Trying not to strain his burnt arm and ignoring the shortness of breath as best he could, he carefully pushed himself up to a sitting position where panting, he leant on his right hand as he strained to look around in the darkness once more. However, there was still no light to see by which meant he'd have to feel his way around and he needed to know the lay of the land if he was ever going to escape. Suddenly, he cried out in frustration as he realised that with his hands encased as they were, he wouldn't even be able to feel his way around.

They were going to move him asap, he remembered finally once he calmed down enough, to a shipping container. In preparation for moving him out of the country, Dogpound had said to Dorkman.

His eyes widened in renewed panic. He'd seen so many T.V. shows and movies where people were smuggled into or out of the country in shipping containers and so many of them died. From extreme heat or cold, from lack of food and water or even air in some cases where not enough seeped inside through the gaps of the container and there were too many people trapped inside for what did make it in.

Oh god! He was so thirsty!

Hungry too! He'd eaten before being captured but how long ago was that now? How long had he been trapped in this awful place?

He could barely even breathe now!

How the hell was he supposed to survive a trip in a shipping container all the way to Japan when he was chained up like this?

Mikey closed his eyes, willing himself desperately to calm down and settle his panicked breathing before he had a full-on panic attack or hyperventilated. There would be no hope if he couldn't calm down enough to even look for a chance to escape.

Finally able to breathe and think again, he eased onto sore knees, feeling the two-inch-wide metal collar shift and pull painfully at his throat. He winced again but forced himself to ignore it as he further pushed his way to his feet even as his chains clanked noisily. Mikey froze and then carefully twisted his hands to grasp at the offending chains to silence them, lest he warn anyone possibly guarding him that he was looking for a way out, only to be reminded that the plaster casts engulfing his hands stopped him from grasping at anything at all.

“Help me,” Mikey tried to whisper in despair but thanks to the gag stuffed in his mouth, he couldn't even move his tongue and what little noise did make it past was badly muffled. He let out a quiet, choked sob, hanging his head and wincing as his chin pressed into the rough, hard edge of the collar.

He couldn't simply wait for rescue. His family would be searching desperately for him by now, yes, but Shredder was having him shipped away as soon as possible. They might not make it in time so he had to find a way out now! Before it was too late!

Using his determination to shove aside his fear, Mikey lifted his head again and jutted out his chin. Slowly, carefully, he slid his feet along the cold metal floor; he had no idea where the walls were or what else was in here with him as it was far too dark to see. He stretched almost useless hands out in front of him, feeling for the walls. Sure, he wouldn't be able to _feel_ them, per se, but he'd certainly be able to tell when he came across any obstacles at least.

It only took a few shaky steps before the hollow thunk of his solid hands hit metal and slowly, he ran one lightly across the corrugated waves of his prison. He turned his head in the darkness, trying to look around again before leaning his good arm, his right one, against the wall. The chill of the faintly oxidised metal made him shiver with cold.

If he could have, he would have bitten his lip as he considered his options but instead, ignoring the faint dizziness that swelled, he shook his head, reminding himself to focus and that he could find a way out. He could do this! He just had to have confidence in himself.

Thus encouraged, Mikey began following the wall until suddenly the collar dug in and pulled at his throat, choking and yanking him down painfully onto his shell.

It was as if Raph had clotheslined him again and for several minutes, all he could do was lay there, gasping and struggling for breath. Finally, when he was able to breathe again, he shifted, moving his chained hands and ignoring the taut, angry pain in his left shoulder, up above and behind his head, feeling around as best he could against the collar. Then he froze as he came across an unyielding obstacle. Shaking slightly at the implication, he shifted his hands further so his forearm rested against it instead and he concentrated on feeling out the shape.

“No!” Mikey screamed frustratedly through his gag. They couldn't have!

And yet... they had...

Attached to the collar he could feel a metal D ring and to that, a chain.

They'd chained him up like a dog! Like the dog Shredder wanted him trained as.

Mikey sobbed in terror. Mutant or not, outcast or not, he was a living, breathing, thinking person. He wasn't meant to be owned or treated like a helpless animal.

And yet, that's exactly what they were doing.

-:-

Sometime much, much later, a faint sliver of light shone through the cracks skirting the door at the far end of his prison. After shivering from cold and fear all night, Mikey tried making his way towards it but he couldn't even make it half the distance before his leash pulled him to a harsh, choking halt. Not enough light penetrated the gloom to make anything out but still, he squinted desperately into the darkness and could only barely make out his hands before his face. Too bad they showed as nothing more than slightly lit shadows in a room darker than night deep in the old, forgotten catacombs beneath the sewers.

Suddenly, he heard a sound from outside and he sat up on his knees alert, scarcely daring to hope that despite the daylight it was his brothers or April come to rescue him. The sound began to move away and he shot to his feet.

“Help me!” he screamed past the gag. “I'm in here!” But only a faint muffled cry made it through. His eyes bulged at the reminder of just how bad his predicament was and no longer caring who was out there, even the possibility of being handed over to the government was better than this, he threw himself bodily at the side of the shipping container, slamming his hands and shell repeatedly into the wall until finally, lightheaded and struggling for breath, he collapsed, physically unable to fight any longer.

As he worked to simply breathe and regain his breath, he stared listlessly towards the light. No one was coming. Either they hadn't heard him or they'd been paid by the Shredder to ignore any and all sounds from inside here.

Finally, exhausted and unable to get comfortable, he closed his eyes and laid on his right side, not daring to roll onto his left like he usually would; just the mere thought of putting any amount of pressure on the badly burnt arm filled him with dread.

-:-

As the day wore inexorably on, the heat began to rise and the air became unbearably stifling.

All Michelangelo could do was lay there lethargic and panting through his nostrils, his eyes flickering around disinterestedly from time to time. His mouth was so dry that even though his tongue was pressed down by the gag stuffed into his mouth, he could feel it glued to the offending rag. He could barely think and moving took far too much energy. The physical pain he was in from his beating at the hands of Dogpound and the Foot and then being branded took a backseat to the overwhelming heat in the air and it oh so briefly crossed his mind that he could very well die in here if he was left much longer.

Somehow, he couldn't muster up the energy to care.

-:-

The limited light faded slowly before his slit gaze until everything was pitch black once more but the heat didn't recede with it. He felt nauseous and weak and the burning from the brand below his shoulder stabbed with every sluggish beat of his heart.

His forcibly clenched fingers cramped painfully and all he wanted to do was stretch and flex them and use them to scratch that damn itch in the spot he could barely reach at the best of times. Not that he had the energy to do so even if he could.

Where were his brothers? His father?

He knew he wasn't in an obvious place to search and even if they thought of trying a shipping container there would be hundreds to search through in the yard but still, surely they should have given him some sign of looking for him by now. Even if it was only via a spiritual message through the Astral like he knew his father more than capable of. Providing of course that he was currently able to hear such a thing. With how he felt now, he had his doubts. But still, he wanted, needed, that confirmation, that acknowledgement so desperately just to know he wasn't as alone as he felt.

Mikey closed his eyes to try to conserve what little energy he had, only to wind up opening them again when keeping them shut proved to take more effort than simply letting them be. Not that it made any difference in the grand scheme of things anyway, given how there was zero visibility in the large, oversized hot box he'd been imprisoned in.

He sighed miserably. He was no Donnie or Leo but he had to think of a way out of this for himself, preferably before he became even weaker.

Suddenly, the sound of a key turning in a lock made it past his fugue and he wearily sat up, staring intently toward the door. The squealing of a rusty bolt sliding sounded painfully but Mikey resisted the urge to clamp his hands over his earholes. Then, after hours of darkness, an agonisingly bright light was directed at his face and he cried out, eyes watering painfully as he tried to shield them from the burning light.

A low, vicious laugh sounded, "Bit warm in here, isn't it, mutt?"

Dogpound. Mikey glowered.

"Amazing what one warm day of sun can do for a place like this after several days of cloud and rain."

Somehow finding the strength despite being so sapped from a long day trapped in this place, Mikey leapt to his feet, growling as fiercely as he could at the overly large silhouette in front of him.

The large mutant abruptly raced at him, causing Mikey, who could still barely see with the light in his eyes, to flinch in surprise. Before he could react, an oversized paw snatched at the chain attached to his collar and viciously yanked down. It was all Mikey could do to throw out his trapped hands to avoid faceplanting as he was ripped to his knees, choking and spluttering from the collar cruelly digging into his throat.

"Dogs don't stand on two feet," the hated voice above him sneered as he continuously pulled and twisted at the chain and Mikey became weaker and weaker from pain and lack of oxygen by the moment. “You'd do well to remember that, mongrel!”

Finally, the strength in his arms gave way and for a moment it was only Dogpound's hold on him keeping him suspended. Then the former celebrity released him and he crashed painfully to the ground, landing on his face.

"Not a dog," Mikey tried to whimper as he attempted to pick himself back up. "Turtle." All that made it past the gag though was unintelligible whining.

“Oh, I'm so going to enjoy breaking you," Bradford sneered as he shoved at Mikey's head, rubbing it into the overly warm metal floor. "I'm going to pay you back tenfold for every indignity you ever inflicted on me."

Mikey closed his eyes, not bothering to respond as he worked to regain his breath. Once Dogpound released him, he achingly pushed himself up to a sitting position and just gazed, nictitating eyelids firmly in place, at the other mutant.

Bradford crouched down and yanked at the bandage covering the brand on Mikey's upper arm, inspecting it. Then roughly slathered cream on it before replacing the bandage, wrapping it tighter than Mikey was comfortable with. "Can't have you taking the easy way out and dying on me, " he sneered once more.

Suddenly, Dogpound slammed a bowl down onto the ground before filling it with water from a bottle. Mikey stared down at it desperately, swallowing his whimper before it could escape.

"Hot day like today, you must be thirsty," Bradford pointed out with a bloodcurdling grin.

Like he wasn't already being tortured enough.

"Beg for it like the mongrel you are!"

Mikey's eyes widened and shot back up at the monster in front of him in disbelief. "Eh?" he spluttered unintelligibly. "How am I supposed to do that, dude?" he tried to ask but all that he could hear was a pathetic whining through the gag.

Bradford stared down at him as if trying to make out what he said. "Close enough for now," he grunted, misinterpreting Mikey. "Here's the deal, mutt," he growled, "I'll remove the muzzle long enough for you to drink but if you yell out or try to call attention to yourself, I'll take the water away again and you won't get another chance to drink until tomorrow night." His eyes narrowed menacingly and Mikey shivered under the terrible gaze. "And tomorrow is going to be even hotter. Think you could survive another day without water?"

Mikey shook his head reluctantly.

"Fine," Dogpound stated in dark satisfaction. He reached out with thick clumsy fingers to undo the muzzle and then removed the gag.

Pins and needles immediately filled his face and Mikey carefully worked his jaw, trying to get some feeling back as he stared down at the pet bowl.

"Well?" Bradford snarled impatiently, "Are you going to drink? I don't have all night to dog sit. I have better things to do!"

Mikey nodded quickly and then, for the first time since having light, looked down at his plastered hands. He lifted them up in front of his face, staring at them in chilled horror. They were obviously curled into fists and wrapped in a layer of solid plaster at least an inch or more thick, stylising them into ungainly paws as if he were an oversized puppy. He swallowed painfully, his dry throat catching agonisingly as he looked up at Dogpound again. "How?" he croaked painfully, the single word being all he could manage.

"Like a dog!" Bradford snarled, viciously grabbing his head and pushing him face-first into the bowl and holding him down.

Mikey spluttered and choked, struggling to get free, to breathe. Finally, his tormentor released him and he came up for sweet, sweet air.

Dogpound grinned menacingly and refilled the bowl. "Better not waste any more, that's the last of it until tomorrow," he threatened.

Mikey swallowed and stared down at the bowl again before finally leaning over and trying to drink. The position was awkward and the motion difficult, especially with the collar taut around his neck. At first, he tried simply sucking it up and that worked at first but as the water level receded, it became more difficult and he was sucking more air than water. It also did not help matters that his face was bigger than the bowl and he simply couldn't reach the bottom properly. In the end, he reluctantly darted out his tongue to lap away at the last few precious drops of water.

"Good boy," Bradford mocked as he finally backed away when he couldn't get any more.

Mikey swallowed again, then held up his hands and looked up. "What did you do to me?" he asked hoarsely.

Dogpound's response was to grin maliciously and chuckle. "It was that or have your fingers removed but the Foot physicians assured me that your recovery time wouldn't be fast enough to get you out the compound before your pathetic brothers could turn up."

Mikey's jaw dropped and he stared up at the mutant he once thought of as a friend in horror. A shudder raced through him as he realised just how close he'd come to irreparable damage and never being able to hold his babies again.

Or anything else for that matter.

His gaze slowly shifted down to the paws again. At least this way, when he escaped he'd still have a chance.

Suddenly, Dogpound grabbed at the chain again, yanking his head back and Mikey yelped as he was choked once more.

"Open up," Dogpound growled, holding the wad of rags in front of Mikey's face. Mikey shook his head adamantly, keeping his mouth firmly shut.

"I said, open up," Dogpound snarled again, shaking around the chain which in turn pulled the metal collar harshly into his throat. Mikey began choking once more.

"Wait! Please!" Mikey cried, trying to pull away and failing. "What about food? I'm hungry too!" But Dogpound only took the chance to stuff the rag back in his mouth, before snatching up the muzzle and securing it back in place on the struggling turtle's face tighter than ever. Then he threw him back to the ground.

With him secured once more, the oversized dog mutant left, shutting the door and sliding the screeching bolt home behind him, leaving Mikey alone to curl up miserable and hungry in the darkness once more.

-:-

The next day was another long one for Mikey. The air in the shipping container didn't really cool much overnight and when the sun came up again, it only heated up even more as the day went on. The incredible heat made it hard to sleep or concentrate and other than a brief attempt at meditation in hopes of calling for his father to let them know where he was and a visit to a chosen corner to relieve himself, all he had the energy to do was lay there again.

At one point, he tried to relieve the pressure of the tight collar on his abused throat but even if he could have used his fingers there wasn't enough room to get them in between and pull it away. Instead, he opted to reach his hands to the back of his neck and push at it. The trouble with that though, was that his hands were still chained. Sure, they had a length of chain between them of a few inches but that still meant where one hand went, the other was forced to follow and that in turn pulled painfully on the still fresh brand just below his left shoulder. So in the end, he just put up with the continuous choking feeling.

Finally, hours after dark, he heard the sound of the bolt sliding open once more and he struggled to his feet, ready to try to fight back but just like the previous night, Dogpound simply ran at him, grabbed the chain and dragged him back down to his hands and knees.

"Standing on two feet isn't natural for a dog, mongrel," Bradford tutted mockingly as Mikey choked.

Mikey's eyes flickered up to him in exhaustion, "Screw you, Dogpound!" he tried to mutter and only ended up coughing.

Then Bradford laughed nastily. "Well, never mind, I have some gifts for you that will fix that kind of bad behaviour."

What did that mean? Mikey shuddered at the tone and implication. He needed to fight back now but no food, no water, overwhelming heat and being regularly choked had taken a toll on him. Still, he put his weight on his hands as best he could and spun, attempting to sweep the large dog mutant's feet from beneath him.

Bradford stared down at him in disbelief. "What was that supposed to be?" Then he laughed raucously at the frustrated expression on Mikey's face. "Oh, that's too rich. You know, I'm starting to think I'm doing your brothers a favour taking something as pathetic as you out of the picture."

"Says the one I beat using his own kata," Mikey tried to retort, despite knowing there was no chance of being understood thanks to the gag filling his mouth and the fact he couldn't move his jaw.

Bradford stared down at him angrily nonetheless. "Dogs can't talk either, remember? Already told you that!" he snarled, cuffing Mikey heavily over the head with his ungainly paw and knocking him back to the floor.

Mikey moaned painfully and tried to glare mutinously up at him. The trouble was, he couldn't tell which of the two Dogpounds he saw was the real one. His unfocused glare only made the evil mutant laugh all the harder.

Suddenly, Bradford stopped laughing and his expression turned hard. "Now for those gifts I promised. If you're a good boy and don't fight, I may even give you a treat." He laughed again and turned to the entrance where Mikey now saw Stockman, standing there, arms laden down with... something that made him shudder in fear.

Mikey whimpered and tried to scramble away but Dogpound caught hold of the chain once more, preventing him from getting anywhere.

"Get in here," Bradford growled and Stockman rushed in. "I'll hold the mongrel down while you attach the braces."

"Braces?" Mikey whimpered unintelligibly.

Dogpound turned, grinning menacingly at him before shoving Mikey down onto his plastron and stepping on his shell, easily holding him in place despite his desperate struggles.

Stockman darted closer apprehensively. "Lift... lift his right leg please," he instructed and Mikey felt his ankle grabbed and yanked into the air. He tried to turn to look at what was being done but couldn't see a thing so once more, he tried bucking Dogpound off his shell but the other mutant was too heavy and far too strong.

Something cold was slid beneath his leg and after the heat of the past two days, the coolness was almost welcome. Until it wrapped around his upper thigh and was clamped in place. "No!" he cried desperately in panic, kicking out with his left leg and scoring a good hit on Stockman himself. "Let me go!" He tried kicking again, this time at Dogpound, but it too, like his other leg, was grabbed at the ankle and this time, squeezed painfully. All Mikey could do was gasp as he felt the bones in his ankle creak.

"Told you to behave," Bradford snarled angrily as he continued to twist and squeeze. "Finish the job, Stinkman!"

"Y-yes, sir!" Stockman stammered timidly, coming forward again.

Then Mikey felt the same cool metal being clamped around his ankle and he whimpered once more. Dogpound continued to hold the leg aloft for a couple more minutes and then it was dropped heavily. Mikey gasped and tried to straighten his leg but it was impossible and he started to panic all the more. What had they done! Distantly, he felt the same process applied to his left leg before it too was eventually released.

Dogpound removed his foot from his shell and grabbed at Mikey, preparing to lift him.

"N-no, wait," Stockman interrupted nervously. "We should do the collar while he's in this position. We c-can continue fixing his posture problem after."

Bradford grunted agreeably and dropped Mikey again, causing him to yelp. Then he stepped onto him once more.

Mikey felt his head forcibly lifted, he guessed by the strap of the muzzle, and then Stockman's hands were beneath his throat, wrapping another collar around it. While this one wasn't as tight and unforgiving as the other, it still remained in full contact with his skin and it felt cold and bumpy on the inside. He shook his head desperately, hoping to knock the human off but he could barely move and Stockman didn't budge.

Finally, with the second collar secured in place, Dogpound stepped off him once more and pulled him onto his carapace, stepping instead on his plastron. Mikey stared wildly up as his hands were grabbed and yanked into the air. There, one of them was released from its manacle but before Mikey could strike out, another manacle took its place and moments later, the action was repeated with the other hand. Finally, he was released and he tried to scramble backwards away from them but no matter how much he tried, he couldn't unbend his legs or even put his arms behind him on the floor.

Terrified by whatever they'd just done, Mikey twisted his body to look, only to see huge metal manacles wrapped around the length of his thighs and ankles with a connecting chain between them, preventing them from straightening more than ninety degrees. "Why?" he cried out, eyes popping in fright. Upon further inspection, he saw the new manacles on his wrists also had a chain connecting them to a D ring on the front of the thigh manacles. He looked up in questioning horror at the human mad scientist, who only coughed self-consciously.

"Give me the remote control and get out of here," Bradford snarled, holding out a demanding hand. Stockman shakily capitulated and all but ran from the shipping container. Bradford then turned and smiled nastily at Mikey. He pressed the button on the control unit, activating it. "Thirsty?" he questioned with a leer.

Mikey hesitated a moment, then nodded, "Yes," he mumbled. Suddenly, a searing jolt of pain shot into his neck from multiple points and he cried out, convulsing uncontrollably before collapsing to the ground. After some time, he opened his eyes and stared up at Dogpound accusingly.

"Shock collar," Bradford explained in dark satisfaction. "Some dogs wear them to train them to stop barking. Of course, the shocks in those aren't as powerful as the one in yours," he continued. "From now on, if you try to speak, no matter how unintelligible, you'll be electrocuted."

Mikey's eyes widened in horror, "No!" he tried to whisper. "I'm not a dog, I'm a... ARGH!" he cried out in pain as the shock collar kicked in once more.

"The only reason it took so long to give you one is that your collar is specially made,” Bradford explained, reaching out a thick furry finger to touch the collar attached to Mikey's neck. “A highly sophisticated piece of technology designed to recognise when you speak actual words. It won't react to simple animalistic sounds, like growling or barking, though, so feel free to do that," he laughed, sounding as though it was a great joke, "but even when you can't be understood like right now, it will pick up on the fact you are trying to speak and it will punish you for it."

Mikey began shaking in a combination of fear, disbelief and anger. He couldn't believe this! How could Dogpound go so far? The former human had proven to be highly sadistic from only a few days after he met him but this... this was just... just way too far!

"Now, you've been such a good boy that I'm going to take off your muzzle so you can drink," the larger mutant mocked, coming closer. Mikey shied away at first but then stopped, because much as he didn't want Dogpound touching him again after all that, he needed to drink. Desperately.

The muzzle and gag were removed and Mikey relished the chance to regain some feeling again as he warily watched Dogpound drop the water bowl in front of him and fill it. As soon as the other mutant gave him permission, he moved forward with difficulty; it was so hard to move with the braces and chains that he wanted to scream. While there was a small amount of give, the chains didn't allow him to straighten his legs and stand, leaving crawling as his only option. He also found the length of the chain between his wrists and thighs also restricted him. Crawling on all fours really was the only viable option but it was so uncomfortable and demeaning that it was all Mikey could do to contain the tears of frustration.

Slowly, he began to drink, carefully watching the unstable former human out of the corner of his good eye, cringing when the mutant became impatient and told him to hurry the hell up. Finally, when he finished, another bowl was plunked down by him. Mikey eyed it suspiciously; it stank.

"Eat!" Dogpound commanded.

Mikey whimpered and mindful of the new shock collar, simply shook his head adamantly, backing away.

The bowl was shoved closer.

"I know you're hungry so I suggest you eat now because the muzzle is going back on when I leave."

Mikey's eyes widened in surprise, "Why?" he asked softly with a whine, then cried out as the collar electrocuted him once more. He fell to the floor, gasping in pain and trying to catch his breath.

"That's why," Dogpound replied with a satisfied chortle. "You haven't learnt how not to speak yet and I can't have you trying to call out for help despite the threat of electrocution. Besides, it's funny!"

Mikey closed his eyes in resignation. He was so screwed. He should have tried harder while he had the chance. Now it was too late and unless his brothers found him in time, he'd never get a chance to escape, not with his hands turned into helpless paws and his legs all but useless and his voice... he choked in fear... taken from him.

"Eat now or starve until we're on the ocean!"

Mikey opened his eyes again and looked up tiredly. How long? He wanted to know but how could he ask without being shocked again and right at this moment, he couldn't take another one like that.

The bowl was picked up and shoved into his face. Mikey heaved at the smell and tried desperately not to throw up. He really couldn't afford to lose the little water he'd just drunk.

Closing his eyes again, he turned his head away obstinately, refusing the so-called meal.

Bradford chuckled evilly. "Yeah, I thought it might be a bit soon. Still, you'll give in when you're hungry enough."

'Not a chance,' Mikey thought as his head was grabbed. Dogpound dug his fingers into the sides of his jaw, forcing it to open and stuffed the disgusting used rag back inside, before strapping on the muzzle again.

"I'll see you shortly before dawn," he mocked. "The container will be loaded on the ship tomorrow and we sail at sunset."

Then he left again, leaving Mikey in the darkness with the bowl of foul-smelling dog food still in reach.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome. 
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I am going to attempt to keep up the pace of updating at least one story each week, whether it is this one, 'Sekai no Owari', 'AOtGO', 'Aftermath' or a one shot. Between this and 'SnO', I certainly have enough at hand ready to go with just some editing, although that said, 'SnO' is a joint project between myself and Sampsonknight so it comes down to both of us having time to work on it. While I don't have a set time for updates, I generally prefer to update around the weekend.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has commented, faved or followed my stuff.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 3

When Dogpound returned before dawn, accompanied by Foot soldiers laden with supplies, Mikey was pressed into a corner as far away from both the bowl of stinking food and his waste area as possible. Mikey opened his eyes to slits, guarding against the bright light and watched as the humans worked, stringing up lights and loading up the far end of the shipping container with boxes and a mattress big enough for Dogpound. Then, at the former man's command, one came to clean up the waste corner and placed a small child-sized plastic sandpit in its place.

"Since I have to live with you for the next few weeks, you do your business in that from now on," Dogpound snarled, making sure he had Mikey's undivided attention.

Mikey turned his head and glanced at it again, nodding fearfully.

"Hungry yet?" the large mutant sneered.

Mikey shook his head and curled deeper into his corner even as his stomach gnawed painfully at him.

"Suit yourself, mongrel."

Finally, with the supplies in place, the Foot Soldiers left and Dogpound closed the door, sliding closed the bolt from the inside. Then he went to his mattress and laid down. Before long, he began snoring away.

Mikey shuddered at the volume. It made Raph only sound like a heavy breather in comparison. After a time, Mikey got to his knees and tried to shuffle along without putting his hands on the ground but the manacles were heavy and it was exhausting so he was forced to put his hands down too. Then he crawled over, trying to get close enough to inspect the boxes that had been brought in but they'd measured the space well and the chain attached to his collar pulled him up short, tantalisingly out of reach.

He sighed miserably. Bad enough being trapped and tormented like this but now Dogpound was in here with him. At least before he'd been alone.

Moving away again, he sat on his haunches and looked up, wishing he could see the sky. He missed the open sky so much. Seeing the lights from planes passing overhead like so many moving stars, the clouds drifting slowly across the sky or perhaps scudding with speed, depending on the wind, the feel of the breeze caressing him as he ran. He froze. He loved running and jumping so much and now, he'd never be able to again. Unbidden, a sob escaped his throat and he worked to swallow any more before they could also break free and wake his tormentor.

Wallowing in despair was useless so he crawled back to his corner and sat cross-legged. He didn't bother with lotus position because quite frankly, holding his hands up for long in this state was difficult. This was his very last chance. His family had to find him now! Before the container was loaded and the ship sailed away, taking him from New York once and for all.

Mikey closed his eyes and tried to concentrate but it was hard. His hunger and thirst, the heat and all the chains and manacles worked to distract him but he had to do this. He was the weakest of his brothers when it came to the meditative arts, just like with everything else, but he couldn't give up! He had to try.

Somehow, after what felt like hours he finally reached the Astral Plane and joy filling him at his achievement, he searched for his father, knowing he was his best bet.

"Michelangelo?"

"Chichi!" Mikey cried, sobbing as he pelted for Splinter, spying his astral form meditating under the tree in the dojo.

Splinter immediately stood, stepping forward with wide eyes to meet him and embraced him tightly, reluctant to ever let go again. "What happened to you, my son? Where are you?"

Mikey pulled away slightly and wiped at his damp eyes. "I got captured by the Foot," he explained, his voicing rising in pitch with every word. "I'm chained up and can't get away. You've gotta come for me," he begged desperately.

"We will, Michelangelo," Splinter promised reassuringly, pulling him close again and hugging him fiercely. “We've been searching everywhere for you since we discovered you did not return home the other night.”

"It's gotta be now! Before it's too late, Sensei," Mikey insisted, barely holding himself together enough to explain as he clutched repeatedly at his father's warm robe.

"We have already searched Foot Headquarters,” Splinter said in alarm. “I know you were there at one point, I scented you but we could not find you. They appeared to have taken you away in a vehicle."

"Yeah, I'm trapped in a shipping container," Mikey nodded as he explained, panic beginning to take control. "They're loading me on a ship today so you've gotta come now!" he pleaded frantically, staring up into his father's face beseechingly.

"Calm down, Michelangelo, or you will lose your connection with the Astral Plain," Splinter chided gently.

Mikey nodded again and tried to curb his rising hysteria.

"Which docks are you at, my son?"

"I-I don't know! I woke up in here! All I know is that they're..." Suddenly, Mikey fell over and he was jolted out of the Astral Plain as the whole shipping container lifted from the ground. Distraught, he cried out, "Chichi!" and then screamed in agony as the collar shocked him once more. Instinctively, he reached up with his hands and tried scrabbling at the collar frenetically, trying to get it away, trying to get it off and failing miserably with being unable to use his fingers to gain purchase.

Finally, breathless and barely conscious, he saw Dogpound standing over him and watching, a malicious grin wide on his face as he laughed. Then everything went mercifully black.

-:-

Mikey groaned as he woke, wet and in pain. He blinked and slowly pushed himself up, ignoring the painful pull in his arm, the choking in his throat and his still twitching muscles.

"Disgusting animal," Dogpound sneered disdainfully.

Suddenly a small wet hand towel hit Mikey square in the face and he squawked in surprise.

"Clean yourself up and the mess on the floor!"

Mikey stared down, dumbfounded, then realised what he'd done, feeling himself heat up in embarrassment. He shuddered and reached up to take the towel, fumbling at it clumsily with hands that couldn't grip, just like paws.

"Normally, I wouldn't give a rat's arse if you soiled yourself," Dogpound snarled angrily, "but right now, we have to share the same damn living space and I will not put up with that smell or that behaviour. Next time, use the damn sandpit at the first sign that you need to go so when you inevitably electrocute yourself, you don't make a fucking mess!"

Quivering with fear, Mikey nodded and tried to wipe himself off, whimpering as he realised he'd been laying on his left and the bandage protecting the burned flesh just below his shoulder was soaked through. No wonder the brand was hurting more than before. He whimpered to grab attention and motioned to the bandage but Dogpound just stared at him, seemingly uncomprehendingly. Then hanging his head, he dropped the towel and rubbed it around, mopping up the mess as best he could. When he was done, Dogpound furiously strode closer and kicked him viciously towards his corner, making him yelp in pain as he rolled, the chain twisting around his neck and choking him even more.

"P-please!" he began, only for his eyes to widen in horror as the shock collar kicked in and he began convulsing and screaming again.

Bradford watched with dark pleasure for a moment before he noticed the chain wrapped around his throat. Once the shock finished, he stomped over the few steps to pick Mikey up and free him from it before dropping him in place.

"You ruined my life, mongrel!" Dogpound snarled furiously. "I am going to take such delight in destroying yours and causing you as much pain and humiliation as possible but don't worry, I won't let you die. Even if Master Shredder didn't want you trained, letting you die would be giving you the easy way out."

Mikey just whimpered slightly as he struggled to regain his breath again.

Dogpound crouched down in front of Mikey and gazed hatefully at him. "Now, that said, we need to talk."

Mikey stared up at him in disbelief. He wanted them to talk? How? Every time he tried he was shocked by the damn collar! He made an inquisitive noise and motioned frantically at it.

Dogpound laughed sadistically. "Get used to it, it's not coming off or being deactivated."

Mikey scowled.

"I talk, you listen and you answer as best you can without words." Bradford smirked down at Mikey's plaster covered hands, "Guess sign language is out too, if you were even intelligent enough to have ever known such a thing."

Mikey scowled again, this time at the slur of his intelligence. He was smart. More so than he generally let on anyway. He just had trouble focusing and liked to tease Donnie by pretending he didn't know how to pronounce certain words just to get a rise from him.

"We need to lay out a few ground rules."

Mikey huffed and looked away and Dogpound grabbed his head and viciously turned it back to face him, squeezing painfully.

"First of all, the Foot owns you now, your brand is proof of that and you'll soon learn that the Foot does not tolerate disobedience or insubordination. For your own sake, you are to be an obedient little pet. I have the remote control to that special collar of yours and can activate it at a moment's notice any time I feel like it. Do you understand?"

Mikey let out a strained noise, unable to even move his head with Dogpound gripping it so tightly.

"I asked you a question, mongrel! Do you understand?"

Mikey tried to make an affirmative noise, while blinking exaggeratedly once, remembering seeing on TV when people who could not talk for whatever reason being told to blink once for yes and twice for no.

Dogpound stared at him then laughed. "I guess that's one blink for yes and two for no?"

Mikey blinked again, his heart pounding rapidly in his chest.

"Good," the monster in front of him rumbled lowly, sounding inordinately pleased. "Now, your name. As I recall, you're the one who started calling me that insulting Dogpound, so let me now return the favour with something more appropriate to you and your new status."

Mikey's eyes widened in fright and he made noises of protest. He already had a perfectly good name, thank you very much and Dogpound knew it. Both his full name and his nickname from back when he stupidly thought they were friends.

Dogpound considered him with a nasty smile, head canted as he thought. "Hmm, how about Rex?” he pondered, deliberately watching and enjoying every second of Mikey's discomfort. “Nuh... too kingly. Hachiko? Too loyal and you don't have that quality. Rufus? Too strong which is something you're definitely not."

Distressed, Mikey whimpered, "It's Mike... GARGH!"

Dogpound swore and snatched his hand away in pain, shaking it and hissing. Mikey noticed and grinned inwardly in satisfaction of his tormentor getting a small taste of pain even as the shock wore painfully on.

Once the shock ran its course, Bradford snarled and picked Mikey up by the head again, smashing it into the wall and grinding it painfully. Then he dropped him and turned away, seemingly thoughtful.

"Fido? Perhaps... though Spot would be rather fitting, given the freckles over that ugly face of yours," Dogpound suddenly mused, as if Mikey had never unintentionally affronted him. "Spot or Fido? Hmm... what do you think?"

Mikey moaned and frantically shook his head. He wouldn't respond to either one.

Then Bradford grinned perversely. "Spot it is. Here Spot! Come boy!" he mocked loudly.

Mikey shrank back into his corner. He wouldn't respond to that name. He wouldn't! But Dogpound scowled and reminded him, "Don't forget, rule one is that you obey me. Remember, I can make your life very difficult and very painful if you don't," he warned, snatching at the chain and pulling it up.

'You already have,' Mikey retorted mentally, glaring up as he tried to clutch protectively at the collar digging deeply into his throat.

Bradford kept pulling until he noticed Mikey weaken and his arms fall. Then he finally let go. "You will respond to your new name, mongrel. You will obey my every command, you will learn not to speak or walk on two legs and when we reach your new home, you will learn tricks like a good dog," he sneered, "or you will be beaten and punished like a bad dog."

Mikey lay helplessly on the ground, quivering and twitching, staring up at Bradford in fear.

Bradford suddenly laughed again. "Isn't this nice? You get to leave your pathetic old life behind and start anew with a brand new name, new home and a new master." Dogpound taunted with a leer. "I've already ordered the construction of a very nice kennel and dog run for you at your new home at Foot headquarters and it'll be ready for you to move into by the time we get there, so that's something to look forward to, right?"

'I don't want a new home or life!' Mikey choked inwardly. 'I just want to go home!' But he couldn't tell Dogpound that. Not only couldn't he speak with the muzzle and he'd be shocked if he tried and he hurt so much right now. Hell, he wouldn't be surprised if he had a concussion after the times Dogpound had backhanded him or slammed his head into the wall. Besides, telling the monster in front of him how he felt would only give him added satisfaction that Mikey had no intention of giving so easily.

"Now, do you understand the rules and consequences of your misbehaviour?" Bradford asked, watching Mikey carefully. Mikey nodded, blinking once in no uncertain terms. "Although I have to tell you, I really don't care if you misbehave. It'll only give me an excuse to hurt you and I'll really enjoy that."

Mikey cringed at the realisation. Dogpound would, too. He had to be smart about this. For his own sake, he had to let Dogpound think he was breaking him but he swore he'd never really break. No way would he ever let the former celebrity win.

-:-

Mikey groaned miserably as he tried to sleep the day away. Once again, it was unbearably hot in the shipping container, yet it was better than the previous day at least. Maybe that was because the sun wasn't beating directly down on it like it had when still in the docks. Dogpound had returned to his mattress after their 'talk' and turned off the lighting so he could see the faint strip of daylight seeping through the cracks in the door and it was definitely muted compared to the previous days.

He'd thought about trying to contact his father again but then realised it would be a waste of time and would only delay them in their search if he managed. Though he hadn't been able to tell him everything he'd told him enough and Splinter would be smart enough to realise he lost the connection because he was being moved. That would help narrow down their search at least. The only problem now was that it was daytime and that would severely limit his family's movements. Still, they were ninja and Mikey had to trust that they'd come through for him in time because there was no other choice.

Suddenly, the floor lurched beneath him and he sat up in panic. They couldn't be moving the container again already, could they? What if his brothers or father were searching this very ship right now? They could miss him if it was placed somewhere they'd already searched. No! He couldn't let this happen but he was chained down and trapped inside so what could he do?

All of a sudden a weary voice growled out through the darkness, "So, we're on our way at last."

What? Mikey stared despairingly towards where Dogpound's voice came from. No! They couldn't be sailing already! His family still had to find and rescue him! He whimpered softly, unable to help himself.

The rough voice laughed cruelly, "Surely you didn't think they'd find you in time, Spot? Not even you could be that stupid," he mocked into the darkness. "Oh wait, of course you are! I forgot who I was talking to for a moment."

Mikey glared hatefully towards his captor. Then there was a shuffling noise and a single light came on, softly lighting the prison but after hours in total darkness, it may as well have been a spotlight aimed directly at him and squeezing his eyes closed, he squawked in pain.

He heard Dogpound stand and squinted open his eyes to watch the evil mutant make his way over to a corner at his end of the prison, hidden from view by the wall of boxes. Mikey soon heard the sound of a small flush and frowned. Chemical toilet, he guessed. He scowled again. Trust Dogpound to get privacy while he had to humiliate himself by being forced to go in front of the monster.

"Ah, that's better," the other mutant jeered. Then his expression turned calculating. "Have you used your pit yet, Spot?"

Mikey looked away, refusing to qualify that with an answer. He'd just have to make sure to go when the lights were out.

Dogpound laughed harshly. "Time to see how your brand is healing." He switched the rest of the lighting on and turned to rummage in a crate, pulling out a first aid kit before moving into range of Mikey's chain. "Come, Spot!"

Mikey just continued to glower at the wall, refusing to move.

Dogpound reached into his pocket and pulled out the remote, deliberately fingering it in Mikey's peripheral vision, "Don't make me repeat myself, mutt!" he warned.

Warily eyeing the device in the other mutant's hand, Mikey shifted to all fours and slowly shuffled his way over, hating himself with every step for capitulating. But if his family were on board the ship and looking for him, he needed to be as able-bodied as possible so as not to slow down their escape further. Finally, he reached Dogpound and sat back on his haunches in seiza, looking up at him accusingly.

"There's a good boy," Bradford jeered derisively, reaching down and too roughly rubbing at his head in a mockery of affection. If Mikey had been capable of gritting his teeth, he would have but they were already forced mostly together by the muzzle clamped tightly to his face and only saved from grinding by the gag stuffed in his mouth and between his teeth.

Bradford put the remote away and opened the first aid kit carefully. Then he reached out to remove the bandage before scowling in disgust and once more backhanding Mikey, knocking him to the ground. Mikey pushed himself right back up, scoffing mentally, 'Raph hits harder than that!'

"You got piss on it!" Dogpound snarled in anger.

Mikey huffed and looked away indignantly. 'Not my fault, jerk. I tried to tell you but you won't let me talk and you wouldn't listen.'

"That better not be infected because of that!" Dogpound snarled angrily, jerking at Mikey's arm, uncaring as he ripped the long dry but smelly bandage off.

Mikey snorted derisively at the idea. Donnie had told them long ago that urine was sterile and after filtering, gross as the idea was, it could even be drunk in an emergency.

"Are you fucking mocking me, mutt?"

Mikey adamantly shook his head, even while thinking, 'Course I am, evil dude!' Suddenly, he yelped in pain as Bradford snatched his arm in a large meaty paw and liberally poured disinfectant over the burn. Tears of agony filled Mikey's eyes and he fought to blink them back.

The larger mutant peered closer, inspecting the wound. He smirked in satisfaction and roughly rubbed some cream over it. "The blisters have started weeping," he stated, pleased. "In a few days, we'll be able to leave that to heal in the open air without risk and then everyone who sees you will recognise you as the property of the Foot."

Mikey's horrified gaze shot up to him and he tried to yank away. When he got out of here, he planned on wearing bandages on his upper arms for the rest of his life!

Bradford laughed and bandaged the brand back up before walking to his side of the container and Mikey watched him warily as he opened the crate to put the supplies away. He went to another crate straight after, pulling things Mikey couldn't see out before sitting on his mattress and beginning to eat, ignoring Mikey the entire time, even as the smaller mutant's stomach gurgled and gnawed painfully at him.

Sometime later, Bradford finished his meal and threw a couple of small scraps at him, bouncing them off his head. After three days without food, Mikey couldn't help himself. He pounced at the morsels and tried to pick them up, just about crying in frustration when he remembered he couldn't. He couldn't even eat them straight off the floor with the damned muzzle strapped to his face.

Dogpound laughed raucously. "Did you forget what you are now, Spot?" he mocked cruelly to Mikey's intense embarrassment. "Oh, that's too rich!"

Unable to get his feelings across verbally any other way, Mikey growled unhappily.

Dogpound grinned and settled back, simply watching Mikey until he had enough and crawled back to his corner, turning his face into it. It was only then that the larger mutant gave up his sport and stood, stretching.

"I'm going out for some fresh air. You be a good boy while I'm gone, Spot." Then Bradford slid open the bolt from the inside, opened the door and left, shutting Mikey inside with nary a whiff of the fresh sea breeze.

As soon as the evil mutant was gone, Mikey cried out in rage and despair, finally allowing the tears of frustration to flow

-:-

By the time Dogpound returned hours later, Mikey had pulled himself together again, composing himself and wiping away every trace of the tears that he could. Then he'd curled up back in the corner so he wouldn't have to look at the monstrous dog mutant when he returned. However, Bradford had other plans.

Doing his best to ignore him, Mikey heard him fiddling around with something before walking over and placing down what sounded like two bowls. "Come here, Spot, it's dinner time," Bradford growled.

Despite himself, Mikey couldn't help but respond and he shifted to his hands and knees and crawled over as fast and confidently as he could. Anything to stick it to Dogpound and give him less satisfaction. Bradford smirked at the sight and Mikey stiffened. Then he came to the end of his tether and saw one of the bowls was out of reach. The water bowl. He tried to reach out with one hand for it, hoping to catch it and pull it forward but the short chain connecting his wrist to his leg stopped him reaching further than his torso length. He scowled and shuffled around, instead reaching out a foot to snag it but Bradford simply moved it further away.

"Uh, uh, uh, Spot. If you want to drink, you have to eat first."

Mikey stared down at the bowl of 'food' in dismay. Seriously?

"Hold still while I remove your muzzle so you can eat," Bradford commanded. Hanging his head, Mikey sat back and stayed still while both that and the gag were removed once more. It wasn't freedom but in comparison to with the hated thing on, it sure felt like it.

"If you're good and eat up fast without complaint, I'll give you a reward," Bradford mocked.

'Let me guess, the reward is not beating me or shocking me,' Mikey thought sourly as he continued eyeing the disgusting looking and smelling 'food'.

"I'll let you keep the muzzle off for a whole hour."

Mikey's gaze narrowed and he looked away. Tempting but not good enough for eating that muck.

"And I'll leave the gag out when the muzzle goes back on." Bradford shrugged. "We're out at sea now and the ship's purser is in the Foot's employ. No one will react at the sounds of an animal in distress from one of the shipping containers," he smirked in amusement.

'That explains how Dogpound was able to go out then,' Mikey thought darkly. Then he sighed reluctantly. No gag was a good incentive. At least he'd be able to move his tongue and maybe he wouldn't feel quite so much like he was short on air. If he could at least open his lips a little he could get extra air through his teeth. Creeping forward, he leant hesitantly towards the food, cringing at the sight and smell. He wondered if he could even eat it considering the cans always said 'not fit for human consumption' until he remembered hearing plenty of stories of how when desperate enough, people did. Simply because it was cheap or all they could find and really... could it be any worse than what they used to eat before pizza?

Whimpering slightly, he put his face down in the bowl and took a tentative bite, feeling sick not just at the thought and smell of what he was eating but also because he was forced to eat like an animal.

The taste was as bad as the smell and that was coming from him who could normally eat pretty much anything and who used to subsist on worms and algae. It was all he could do to swallow and not bring it up again but cringing, he dipped his head down and took another small bite.

"Good boy, Spot," Bradford purred in satisfaction. He slid the water bowl closer and Mikey immediately shifted to drink some to wash away the disgusting taste, shuddering as he did. He glanced back at the food bowl, really not wanting to return to it but he was so hungry and he needed to keep his strength up so he closed his eyes and returned to it. Trying and failing to imagine it was pizza instead - pizza cooked by Leo... he shuddered again... or Raph. By the time he made it halfway through the bowl though, he was shuddering with every bite and couldn't take another so he returned to the water bowl and drank it all, tepid though it was in the heat of their abode.

"You still have some left, Spot," Dogpound warned when Mikey shifted away from the bowls.

Mikey shook his head and mouthed, 'Can't. I'll be sick.'

"What was that?" Bradford mocked loudly, putting a hand up to his large, furry ear.

"Can't!” Mikey repeated. “I'll be si... ARGH!"

Bradford chuckled in amusement and when the agonising shock finished, came over and stuffed the gag back into an unresisting Mikey's mouth and reattached the muzzle just as tight as ever. Mikey whimpered loudly, pawing at it desperately. Dogpound had promised an hour without the thing and no gag if he ate! He should have known the vindictive mutant would go back on his word!

"You didn't eat it all and you certainly didn't eat fast," Bradford taunted as he watched with cruel amusement. “Dogs wolf down their food so fast they can't taste it. You need to learn the correct behaviour if you want to be a convincing dog for your new masters, Spot.”

Tears threatened and blinking them back again, that's when Mikey realised, Dogpound would come up with any excuse not to keep promises or simply to hurt him.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.
> 
> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 4

The weeks dragged by as the huge cargo ship crossed the ocean and things didn't improve much. Bradford at least eventually stopped stuffing the gag into Mikey's mouth every time and Mikey learnt to wolf the food down after a few days to get it over and done with since eating slowly just prolonged the torment. Not having much freedom or room to move about in also took a toll on him. Instead of getting used the weight and constriction of his restraints, it slowly became harder to lift his hands. Dogpound became more irritable the longer the journey took and he often took it out on Mikey, beating him over the slightest insult, imagined or otherwise and leaving him covered in a rainbow of bruises in various stages of healing but the good thing was that he left the shipping container more often for longer. He also took to leaving the muzzle loose enough that Mikey could at least open his mouth enough to drink, provided the bowl had enough water in it for him to reach it, that was.

The brand below his left shoulder healed enough in the time that it was no longer agonising, though it still pulled uncomfortably, reminding him of its presence often and worryingly, he rarely felt much sensation from his fingers any more, cramped as they were within the confines of their plaster prisons. While Bradford was out, he often took the chance to try to chip away at the plaster against whatever hard surface he could find in the dark, hoping to eventually break free. If he could, then he'd at least be able to undo the manacles and maybe the chain from his collar and then he'd have a fighting chance. It was slow going and it jarred his hands painfully each time but he refused to give up.

Mikey tried numerous times over the weeks to call out to his father again but his spirits had hit rock bottom between the constant boredom, fear and abuse and he was so tired all the time that he had no real chance of meditating, let alone making it into the Astral Plane. Still, though, he tried and the one time he was caught by Dogpound, he was beaten into unconsciousness due to not being proper 'doglike behaviour'.

Suddenly, the door slid open and blinking against the light as it switched on, Mikey glanced up to see a disturbingly jovial Dogpound entering the prison and he shuddered at the thoughts of what that mood might mean for him.

"Good news, Spot!” Dogpound growled in pleasure, “We arrive at port in just a few more hours. After we're unloaded, we'll have to wait for dark but then a Foot escort will come to pick us up and take us to your new home."

Mikey stared up silently in dismay. He had mixed feelings about that. On one hand, this was all bullshit and he wanted to go home so badly to where he was loved and would be free once more! On the other hand, surely anything had to be better than this existence, right? Maybe? Well, if nothing else, at least it would be different and he would no longer be trapped in close quarters with Dogpound the whole entire time but then he remembered Dogpound's promise of a kennel for him and he shivered. He would still be trapped and treated like a dog rather than the sentient mutant turtle he really was and then there was the question of if he'd even be alone or, he gulped, have company.

"Aren't you excited boy?" Dogpound sneered hatefully. "You'll finally be able to go for walks on a leash and we can start training you to do tricks like any other pet dog."

Mikey's eyes narrowed dangerously. Yeah, no. Not happening. He was ninja, just like the rest of his family and that was something Bradford had already seemed to forget in these last few weeks. His father always told them anything was a weapon in the hands of a trained ninja and it was time to act on that. While he still had the chance.

He immediately stood on his hands and knees and trotted unsteadily over to the empty food bowl, whining plaintively and tapping at it with his plaster paw, pleading with his patented puppy dog eye technique. God, how he hated that term now and as much as he used to take great pride in his skill, he swore that if he ever got out of this, he'd never subject anyone to it again. No, not if he did, when he did. He'd never again do anything that might remind him of his time of being some sicko's pet dog.

"Aww, hungry, Spot?" Bradford asked sarcastically. Mikey nodded emphatically and whined pathetically once more, knowing how when he played along, Bradford was more manipulable. Bradford stared at him, eyes narrowed suspiciously. Then he shrugged. "Fine, I'll feed you since you're actually behaving like the mutt you are for once. Think of it as a reward for tolerable behaviour."

Carefully schooling his expression so as to not alert his captor to his true intentions, Mikey shuffled back a couple of steps, sitting on his haunches in seiza innocently. He continued staring down at the bowl hopefully, keeping a careful watch on Dogpound out the corner of his eye. It didn't take long for the other mutant to approach and crouch down by the bowl to pour the sloppy contents of a cheap can of pet food into it. Mikey tried not to shudder at the smell and consistency of the food and instead bided his time carefully, waiting until Dogpound was as distracted as he was likely to get. Then he launched himself, pouncing at his tormentor's head. Mikey immediately wrapped the chain connecting his left arm to his leg around Dogpound's throat and pulled, squeezing tight with everything he had.

Bradford roared!

He reached up with meaty paws to pull Mikey off but Mikey simply pulled tighter, using his shackles against his captor with everything he had! He'd trained with chained weapons for more than half his life, they were his forte and he wasn't willing to allow them to be used against him any longer. Channelling his inner Raph, Mikey growled fiercely in determination. He pulled and twisted the chains tighter and tighter until he could hear Bradford choking and then refused to let up. Elation filled him as he felt Bradford slowly weaken beneath him but then, right at the cusp of Bradford falling, he saw the remote clutched weakly in his tormentor's hand. Mikey's eyes snapped wide in fright but before he could even try to knock it from his grasp, Dogpound pressed the button. Electricity surged through his collar and Mikey screamed in pain and frustration.

 _No!_ He couldn't lose now! Not when he was so close! Desperately, Mikey fought against the collar to keep pulling but far too quickly, he lost control of his body. The surge finally ended and still twitching and unable to move, he became dimly aware of Bradford's grasp on his arm. Before he could open his eyes again, there was a vicious twist and a loud crack. Then, crying out in agony once more, Mikey felt himself flying through the air.

-:-

" _You... stupid... little mongrel!_ " Dogpound snarled breathlessly when whimpering in pain, Mikey's eyes opened at last. “Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed?"

'What would you care, anyway?' Mikey panted silently with an unfocused glower. He shifted, trying to push himself up and cried out at the excruciating pulsating in his broken left arm. Mikey couldn't immediately decide which was worse, the pain of the freshly broken limb or when he'd first been branded.

"Can't believe that _you_ , of all people, just tried to kill me! _Me!_ The hand that feeds you! _We're still out at fucking sea!_ " Dogpound yelled hoarsely, rubbing carefully at his tender throat.

'So what?' Mikey sneered mentally, staring up at Dogpound defiantly as he continued to pant in pain. 'You said yourself the ship will reach port in a few hours or so, dude. It's not like I'd have to survive long without you and I'm sure in that time I could finally have cracked through the damn plaster on my hands!'

Bradford narrowed his eyes at Mikey and growled at the defiance he saw. He stomped close and viciously slammed Mikey's head into the wall again. "Do you _know_ what the Foot would do to you if they discovered you'd murdered me?"

Trembling in pain and not a little fear, Mikey worked to push himself up again once he'd been dropped. 'Couldn't be much worse than what you've already done,' he moaned to himself petulantly.

"Well, now you're about to find out just how much worse I can make things for you," Dogpound snarled, pushing Mikey back down with a heavy foot on his plastron. Then with a sneer that made Mikey's blood chill, Bradford lifted his foot and instead stomped it down on his broken arm, grinding it into the ground.

"Stop!" Mikey screamed in agony, the word surprisingly clear despite the muzzle still strapped tightly to his face. Then the collar kicked in again and it was all too much.

-:-

Mikey shot up, choking and gasping at the acrid stench filling his nostrils and cried out softly as pain ripped through him at the sudden movement. As he blinked muzzily up at Dogpound who towered over him, he realised the cruel villain had taken the opportunity of him being out cold to tightly replace the muzzle after stuffing the rag back in his mouth. It was so tight now he was sure he felt blood trickling slowly down the straps.

"Get on your feet and walk mutt" the other mutant growled, reaching out and snatching the chain attached to Mikey's collar, "or I'll drag you to the damn truck."

Terrified he'd do just that and wind up choking him again, Mikey struggled to do as he was told. However, he couldn't put any weight on his left arm. Instead, he tried to cradle it as close to his plastron as possible, crawling on just the two knees until Bradford angrily yanked him down again with the leash, choking him yet again.

"All fours, Spot," Bradford sneered hatefully as he kicked him hard in the side.

Mikey let out a strained sound of complaint and worked to pick himself off the ground again. Completely unable to use his left arm, he had to make do with just the right, dragging the left along the ground and as unused to the position and crawling as he was, he couldn't move fast enough for Dogpound's liking. He kept over balancing, slipping and falling and so Bradford was as good as his word and simply started dragging Mikey across the sharp gravel surface of the road, choking him the entire time and it wasn't long before he lost consciousness for the third time that day.

-:-

He awoke with a jolt to that awful sharp stench again, smelling salts, he dimly realised, only to feel meaty fingers digging painfully into his face, the tips of vicious claws breaking his skin as he was lifted into the air. Mikey stared with terrified, pain-clouded eyes into Dogpound's hate-filled ones and swallowed uncomfortably.

"Let me tell you how this works from now on, Spot," Bradford growled menacingly as he squeezed tighter, eliciting a sharp intake of breath from Mikey. "You are now nothing more than a dumb animal and you will act as such! You will no longer show any signs of human-like intelligence or behaviour, like nodding, for example. The researchers at the compound are all very eager to find out how you tick but have been warned you are off-limits. For now.” A terrible smile stretched across the mutant dog's face. “However, if word somehow gets out that you are more than the dumb animal you appear to be, they have full permission to play with you to their little black heart's content, as long as they don't kill you."

Mikey shuddered and whimpered softly in terror and Bradford paused and smiled again, the malice in his expression chilling Mikey to the core.

"They are very good at their jobs,” he warned. “They are more than capable of keeping a subject alive and awake while opening them up to see what's inside. So if I were you, I'd curb any and all remaining human-like behaviour from this point on. For your own sake, of course." Bradford then dropped his volume to a menacing growl. "Do you understand me, Spot?"

Making desperate affirmative noises, Mikey nodded frantically as best he could and Bradford shifted his grip so the claws dug in just a little deeper, drawing more blood.

" _I asked if you understood me!_ " Bradford roared, throwing Mikey to the bed of the truck.

Unable to help himself, Mikey cowered down, incapable of meeting his tormentor's gaze as he whimpered in fear.

There was silence for several long moments and then Dogpound slowly smiled, "Much better," he purred in delight. "You would do well to remember that submissive behaviour towards your masters and alpha, but don't fear, Spot, I'll help you out once we get there."

Involuntarily, Mikey's eyes flickered up to see the cruel grin widening on Dogpound's furry face once more.

"I'm sure you're worried about accidentally speaking and giving yourself away? Yes? Well, worry no more. As soon as we arrive, you're going to see the vet. She'll take care of that broken foreleg of yours along with any other injuries and while she's at it, that pesky little speaking problem you still have."

The panic at those words bubbled up in Mikey but before he could protest, the vehicle ground to a sudden halt, making him slide forward out of control and he yelped as his arm jolted painfully. Dogpound smirked down at Mikey and snatched up the chain, detaching it from the wall.

"Home at last. Aren't you excited, Spot?"

Mikey whined fearfully again. No, no, he was totally not.

Suddenly, the truck door flung open and Mikey cringed back from the faint light of the rising dawn and the dark, menacing ninja surrounding the vehicle. Bradford jumped from the bed of the truck to the ground below.

"Come on, Spot, let's go!" he laughed evilly, tugging harshly on the lead.

Reluctantly, Mikey edged his way to the door, staring down in trepidation.

"Jump, boy!" Bradford commanded, impatiently tugging at the chain again.

He had to be kidding, right? His arm hurt all the more just thinking about it. Mikey whimpered and shook his head emphatically. He couldn't! He couldn't do it!

Dogpound growled a warning and Mikey swallowed nervously at the reminder. Then he edged forward again, before turning around to slide to the ground backwards.

"Front first, Spot, or would you prefer being handed over for research before even seeing your new home?"

Mikey froze and then did as he was told, jumping down front first. As he landed, a fiery jolt shot through his left arm and with a yelp, he collapsed, his vision whiting out. Then Bradford simply dragged him once more.

-:-

When Mikey woke for the fifth time that day, it was to find himself laying awkwardly on his left, on a large, shining, cold metal table. He tried to push himself up, only to be shoved straight back down. Twisting his head, he peered up to see Dogpound leering cruelly at him and despite the discomfort, he hunkered down more, curling up to protect himself. After several minutes, unable to curb his curiosity any longer, he peered fearfully around the room from his position. Vet surgery, he quickly realised with a rising panic, just like Bradford had promised.

Suddenly, the sound of a door sweeping open from behind caught his attention and shaking, he tried twisting to see what new threat approached but Dogpound had a crushing grip on his right shoulder, keeping firmly him in place.

"So this is the strange new animal you brought from America!" A bright, delighted voice rang out, making him shudder involuntarily at her eagerness.

He heard her excited footsteps rush closer. "You have no idea how much I've been looking forward to studying one of these creatures ever since I first heard the rumours of them!"

Dogpound grunted. "Well, with how often the stupid mongrel keeps forgetting his place, you'll probably get your chance sooner rather than later."

Mikey couldn't help the small whimper of fear at the not-so-veiled threat and he heard an amused chuckle from above him.

Just then, a small but strong-looking Asian woman in a white lab coat appeared in front of him, her eyes hungrily examining his form. Her expression turned unimpressed and Mikey cringed. She looked up scathingly at Bradford.

"What the hell have you done, Chris?" she demanded angrily. "He looks half dead!"

"Spot deserved it. He tried to kill me yesterday."

The woman snorted derisively. "This little thing? You're more than _twice_ his size. Almost three times, in fact!"

Bradford scowled and dug his fingers into Mikey's shoulder harder, causing him to yelp in pain again. "Damned mongrel tricked me, took me by surprise," he explained sourly.

“By the look of his physical condition, I can't say I'm surprised he turned on you,” the woman retorted as her eyes hungrily examined Mikey, making him feel like a piece of meat laid out on a chopping board. Suddenly, her gaze faltered at his lower regions and she canted her head thoughtfully. “It is a he, isn't it?”

“Assume so,” Dogpound grunted dismissively. “Not like I ever saw him go to his pit.”

Mikey flushed at the reminder of sometimes having to hold on for hours until his tormentor either left the shipping container or the lights were out and the room filled with deafening snoring.

"Just do what you gotta do to patch him up so I can take him to his kennel already. Oh yes, I also want his voice box removed while you're at it," Bradford sneered sadistically.

'No! You can't do that to me!' Mikey whimpered in terror. Even if he couldn't speak, at least the sound of his voice was a comfort, making him feel not quite so alone and it always had been as long as he could remember. How was he supposed to survive this place without a voice?

The vet gave Bradford a sharp look. "Why bother when you already fitted him with a shock collar. An unusually powerful one at that, if I'm not mistaken."

"Spot's a slow learner," Dogpound snarled, digging his fingers hard into Mikey again.

The woman sighed and reached out to examine Mikey's collar, her warm fingers brushing against his neck. "No, I can't do it," she said flatly. Dogpound growled menacingly but she wasn't impressed by his aggression. "You should have had it done in New York, before making that collar impossible to remove. With that in the way, I cannot do as you ask."

Careful not to let anyone see, Mikey sighed inwardly in relief.

"Besides, I have a far more elegant and simple solution," she offered with a smile. Mikey's eyes flew open again and he stared at her as a chill ran through him.

"Yeah? What?" Dogpound grunted.

"I can paralyse his vocal cords with a simple injection I helped develop a few years ago. It works on both humans and most animals and considering Spot's characteristics, I have no doubts about it working on him too."

Dogpound frowned as he considered. "Does it wear off?"

"Oh no," the woman chuckled, making Mikey tremble in fear. "It's quite permanent, although it can be reversed if you have the antidote but I assure you, since it's a drug developed by the Foot, no one else _has_ the cure. It's come in quite handy for operations in high-density population areas where you can't risk anyone hearing the screams."

"Do it, then," Bradford commanded gleefully.

She nodded, "First though, I need to treat his injuries." Mikey tried to pull away as she reached for his neck again but Bradford held him firm.

"The collar stays," Bradford growled as she began to unbuckle the shock collar.

"I assume you must have a remote for it then?" the vet asked as she deftly removed it. "Don't worry, I'll replace it after. I need to treat the chafed and broken skin around the metal collar first. Hmm, that's quite nasty, it's starting to become infected."

Helpless to move, Mikey watched as she turned away to grab something from a nearby cupboard. His eyes widened again as he saw a large needle inserted into a bottle. The plunger was pulled and liquid rushed into it. After flicking the air bubbles out, the scary woman stepped close and Mikey twisted his head to see what she was doing. Suddenly, a sharp prick entered the back of his upper thigh and a numbing sensation quickly spread throughout his body. The woman smiled a cool smile at him before looking up at Bradford again.

"You can leave now, Chris."

Dogpound twitched. "And leave you alone with this vicious mongrel?" he asked in blatant disbelief.

"Aw, I didn't think you cared," she mocked. Then, far more seriously, “I'm ninja too, Chris, as well as a vet. I think I know how to handle wild animals, even exotic ones such as Spot. Besides, he's tranked now. He couldn't move more than a centimetre if he tried."

Mikey whimpered fearfully and tried to move, only to discover she was right. His whole body was numb and his mind becoming sluggish, making it difficult to think.

"Leave, Chris. I have work to do cleaning up some of the damage you've caused."

"Fine," Bradford growled, "but don't blame me when he tries to break your neck with his own chains."

She looked down to study Mikey, then said drily, "I really don't think that'll be a problem. Besides, I'm removing the manacles on his forelegs. Or his left, at least. It'll interfere with the placement of the cast when I set the bone."

"Remove them both then," Bradford sneered scornfully as he looked at Mikey in disgust.

Mikey was dimly aware of her gazing at Dogpound quizzically.

"Chains are far too dangerous in that animal's paws. Already decided they had to go the moment he tried to kill me with them. Besides, they're only going to get in the way when he starts his training. Although, that in itself could be rather amusing to watch," Bradford smiled coldly. Then he left, slamming the door and leaving Mikey at the mercy of the woman who drugged him the moment she lay eyes on him.

The woman began moving around him, placing her hands on him and slowly, carefully removing his restraints and straightening him out to lay flat on his plastron on the cold silver examination table. Hazily, he tracked her with his eyes as she finally came up level with his head. She reached down and finally undid the straps of his muzzle, gently pulling it away and then taking the gag from his overly dry mouth. "You poor creature," she murmured at last. "Chris Bradford really doesn't know where to draw the line between punishment and outright cruelty." She sighed, reaching out to examine the cuts in his face caused by the tightness of the muzzle's straps. "Hmm, you have tough scales so they're not as bad as I first thought. Some aloe should help with that though," she mused softly.

Mikey whimpered in pain as he tried to draw away from her touch.

"It's okay, don't fret so much, Spot, I'm here to help you, not hurt you. I'm Mai, by the way."

"Mikey," he whispered hoarsely, feeling as though drifting through a dream.

Mai's eyes shuttered in displeasure. "Hmm, I see what Chris meant. Well, we really can't have that," She turned away and rummaged through an equipment draw. Then, seemingly moments later, or maybe hours, Mikey was having a really hard time telling the passage of time right now, she returned with a large shining metal and leather instrument in hand, making him quiver in fright at the sight of it. Smiling, she held it up in full view of him, "This speculum is normally used to allow for the safe examination of inside horse's mouths but since yours is quite unusually large for a creature of your size, it should do the trick nicely for you too, Spot."

Now shaking in full out terror, Mikey tried to push himself upright, tried to get to his feet and run but he couldn't move and he began to panic. "P-please don't," he begged desperately, his voice faint from disuse even to his own hearing. "I'll d-do whatever you want me to but please don't..." As he spoke, squirming desperately in place, the woman took the opportunity to promptly insert the speculum into the weakly struggling turtle's mouth. To his horror, he felt flat plates pressed against his top and bottom teeth and his tongue before leather straps were tied behind his head, holding the device firmly in place. With tears of fear and indignation forming quickly in his eyes, he could do nothing as Mai twisted the screw knob to the side of his head and forcibly spread his jaw open wide until they ached. Then humming happily, Mai moved away again, returning a few minutes later and holding a large syringe with a long curved needle in hand. Mikey tried shaking her off as it, along with a small dentist's mirror, was inserted into his mouth and down his throat. He tried desperately not to swallow as he felt it shift around as Mai searched. Then, a twist and a jab and cold, thick liquid entered his flesh and he screamed.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to let me know what you think :-)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.
> 
> A/N: Dialogue surrounded by [ ] is translated from Japanese.
> 
> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 5

His body felt numb and kind of stiff. While he could still feel the aches and pains of his beatings and general mistreatment from the last few days and weeks, they were significantly dulled from what they had been and his body still extremely unresponsive. Slowly blinking open his eyes, Mikey surreptitiously looked around. The woman, the supposed vet, Mai was nearby, sitting with her back turned and far higher above him than he last recalled. Unable to help himself, he softly whimpered as he shuddered at the distant memory of her hands exploring all over his body, poking and prodding as she worked on him. Thankfully, she didn't seem to notice him awake yet and carried on working. With some effort, Mikey tore his gaze away from her to continue studying his surroundings, only to discover he was now laying curled low to the ground on a large mesh, trampoline style dog bed. He cringed at the realisation that they really were hoping to continue this stupid charade that he was something he was not. Still, he mused, at least it wasn't the floor again like in that awful, stinking hot shipping container.

From where he lay, he tried to make out his body as best he could. His left arm was set in an almost full length cast with only a slight bend in the elbow, causing him to frown. Every time any of them had broken an arm growing up, Master Splinter had insisted on casting their arms fully bent so they could be hung in a sling, something about it being better for the healing process, he vaguely recalled their father saying. So why wasn't his set that way now?

'Well, when was the last time you saw a dog with a broken leg in a sling?' a traitorous voice inside whispered mockingly.

His breath caught in his throat. _They were crazy!_ Dogpound really was set on turning him into a dog in all but body, he realised in disbelief and everyone else was just going along with it! A small part of him had believed that once they arrived in Japan, they'd give up on that stupidity or someone would tell Dogpound just why it wouldn't work and then they'd just treat him like any other enemy prisoner, not like this. They were actually expecting him to continue walking around on all fours like an animal, even with a clearly broken arm. No... he shuddered again with a soundless whimper, a broken leg because dogs didn't have arms, they only had four legs. Mikey choked out a sob. A moment later, he frowned as it hit him. Something was wrong. Really, really wrong. Other than a harsh gasp of air, he hadn't heard a thing. What the hell? A dim memory of Mai offering to paralyse his vocal cords and then forcing his mouth wide open and sticking a huge needle down his throat surfaced and another soundless, terrified sob broke free. As he quivered with the emotion wrought by the traumatising memory, his eyes flickered up to Mai again, her back still turned as she continued typing away at the computer in front of her. Swallowing down his fear as best be could and biting his lip, he contemplated if he really wanted to risk drawing her attention by trying to talk, trying to see if he'd really lost his voice. Then realising the risk wasn't worth it, he forced his attention back to examining what he could make out of his body considering he still couldn't move properly yet.

His legs, what he could see of them anyway, were swaddled in bandages covering all the gravel rash and the cuts caused by the braces rubbing against his flesh and cutting into him. Suddenly, Mikey's eyes shot open wide in surprise. The braces! They were gone! He actually had a chance to make a run for it once he could finally move properly again! A small smile of hope and delight made its way to his face as his eyes flickered towards his wrists. They weren't weighed down anymore either and the manacles were clearly removed, soft bandages covering all the cuts and injuries caused by the chafing and being dragged along the road. As for his hands, well, he couldn't see them as they dangled off the edge of the bed but the constant pins and needles feeling was long gone and he could actually flex his fingers slightly now, though they still felt wrong. He could only put that down to the fact they'd been encased for so long in form-fitting plaster with no give and that he was still affected by whatever she'd drugged him with. His faint smile turned sly.

Unfortunately, though, he could still feel the collar hugging his neck tightly and making him feel constantly short of breath and he could only hope nothing was connected to it, chaining him in place. Still, if he really had his hands back, then maybe... just maybe...

Thinking fast, Mikey concentrated hard and carefully tested his ability to move. It was still difficult but the drug was clearly beginning to wear off. Finally, he managed to pull his right arm fully onto the bed, a sight that caused him to hitch his breath in dismay.

The awful plaster stylised paws were gone but in their place, a large pair of focus pads sat, tightly secured in place and then duct-taped to make sure he couldn't work the straps free with his teeth.

"Ah, Spot! You're awake at last," Mai called out pleasantly and Mikey looked up to see her swivelled around on her chair and facing him.

Mikey clenched his teeth in anger. _Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!_ He just had to draw her attention, didn't he?

"Are you feeling any better now, Spot?"

Mikey scowled in disgust and tried to move, to shuffle back, and frustration filled him as he discovered he still didn't have enough control over his body yet.

Her face softened in sympathy, "I'm sorry but it'll be another couple of hours before the drug wears off fully. Still, that's a good thing since you really do need to rest right now."

She stood and came close, crouching down in front of him. "I'm sure you're curious about your injuries and treatment?" Mai stared at him expectantly but he didn't react, refusing to give the woman the satisfaction. Her expression shifted and she seemed to shrug. "Your left arm, I mean foreleg, was broken in two places, at the elbow and midway between your elbow and wrist. I've set the bones and placed it in a cast sturdy enough to help support your weight without putting too much stress on the healing bones. I know that it's going to be difficult for you but you really need to try to keep off it as much as possible over the next couple of months."

And how the hell was he supposed to do that with the ridiculous expectations placed on him by Dogpound?

"You've also probably noticed your leg braces have been removed," she continued and Mikey couldn't help but glance over to where they lay against the nearby wall. "They, along with the manacles you wore on your wrists had chaffed your skin badly, cutting into it even through your thick scales, so I've removed them and treated the wounds. Infection was setting into a couple of the wounds on your legs and neck so I've given you a general antibiotic that I know to be compatible with both reptiles and humans. I've left the braces off for now to give you a chance to heal, however, I will only warn you once. If you try to stand on your feet while they are off, I will immediately have them reattached.” Her eyes narrowed as her expression became stern. “Do you understand me, Spot?"

Mikey simply continued to stare at her and she stared back, waiting. Finally, she sighed.

"It's okay, Spot, you can answer me."

'And give you an excuse to experiment on me? I don't think so, crazy lady,' he thought bitterly, turning his head, unable to keep looking directly at her. However, he continued watching from the corner of his eye.

Mai straightened and rubbed at her arm before looking back down at him. She sighed again. "Yes, I am under orders to do research on you should you forget your place and make no mistake, Spot, I very much look forward to the opportunity. However, as a vet, I also have a duty of care to you so when the time comes, no matter how invasive my research becomes, I will not do you any permanent injury."

'And what do you call taking my voice away?' Mikey thought sourly, continuing to glare at nothing and trying desperately not to let her see his distress. He was sure he was failing and that she could see right through him.

"For that, you can thank Master Shredder as he requires and expects all his animals to be in perfect health," Mai continued with a cold smile.

Mikey couldn't help the shudder of fear that rippled through his body at those chilling words.

"Now that said, you are safe with me while you are recovering in my surgery. Once you leave though, even if you return with more injuries, your grace period will be over and I will do my job as ordered. In the meantime, when the effects of the tranquilliser have worn off completely, I have some questions for you that I would like you to answer."

Mikey clenched his cramped fingers within the glove portion of the focus mitts and wondered if he could take advantage of them once he gained control of his body back.

"In the meantime, I need to establish a medical baseline for you so if any problems arise I will know how to treat you. I already took full x-ray scans of your skeletal structure while you were unconscious, fascinating by the way, and a sent away a blood sample to analyse which inoculations you may have had before and which you need now. However, I need to take another now and I will need to take your core temperature every few hours to establish what is normal for your unique species."

Allowing his expression to darken, Mikey watched her closely as she moved to pick up a syringe and kneel beside him. The woman gently took his right arm and expertly inserted the needle, drawing blood until she deemed she had enough. Then she walked away with the sample out of his sight and he whimpered silently at the invasion, drawing in on himself slowly. Suddenly she was back and he felt her tugging at his tail. His eyes shot wide open and he turned his head to stare at her accusingly. He fought against her grip, trying desperately to keep his tail tucked safely away but he was still weak and moments later, he felt something cold quickly inserted into his bum. "What are you doing? Stop!" Mikey cried out silently, struggling fiercely to get away from it, away from her.

Mai looked up and smiled, resting a gentle hand on his leg, "Shh, Spot, it's alright,” she soothed in what he supposed was meant to be a comforting tone. “I already told you, I'm just taking your temperature."

Mikey's jaw dropped open. From his butt? Seriously? Was this woman insane? God he wished he could yell at her right now. Instead, shaking from the violation, he stuck his tongue out at her, lifting it to show her that that was where you were supposed to insert a thermometer but she just canted her head slightly, then chuckled in understanding.

"Under the tongue or armpit is where _humans_ have their temperatures taken and you are not human. Animals have it taken via their rectums. Now stop struggling so much, you don't want it to break inside of you."

Mikey froze in horror at the thought but then he couldn't help but try to get away from it again, twitching and shifting uncomfortably around it, small as it was.

"Spot, if you continue to struggle like this every time I take your temperature, I'll be forced to dope you up on a muscle relaxant again in the future and I really don't want to have to keep doing that," Mai threatened darkly.

'Oh god! Oh god! Oh god! I'm in hell! _Bros! Master Splinter!_ Where are you? I need you! _Please!_ ' and then tears started falling down his face as he remembered they never came for him and he was taken out of the country and halfway across the world. He began to sob as it really hit him that he would never see home and never see his family ever again.

Suddenly, he jolted as he felt Mai's hand pat him on the head as if trying to be reassuring, "There, there, it's all over for now. Now rest Spot, I'll be back to talk to you later."

-:-

Gasping, Mikey bolted upright and looked wildly around before shrinking in on himself. It wasn't a nightmare, after all, he realised with a desperate pang. He really was in some psycho's vet clinic at a Foot stronghold on the other side of the planet and they really were trying to turn him into some kind of messed-up turtle dog mutant.

He fought to control his laboured breathing as he looked around. There was no sign of Mai close by so he pushed himself up onto his knees and peered across the room. As he shifted, he felt weight pulling from behind on the collar around his neck and he twisted to see a chain attached and securing him to a ring bolted tightly into the floor beside the bed. Sighing in frustration, Mikey dropped back down onto his haunches and stared miserably at the overly large pad taped to his right hand. What was he supposed to do now? His hopes for escape kept getting dashed at every turn.

Kneeling up higher once more, he cast his gaze around the room again but there was no one in sight. He frowned in confusion, surprised to find himself alone when Mai had threatened to put the braces back on him if he rose to his feet, all but implying he'd be watched at all times. For a moment, the part of him that always landed him in trouble with his father and brothers encouraged him to try anyway, to test the boundaries Mai and previously Dogpound had set but then he sighed. What was the point? If someone was watching him from outside the room and told on him, he'd only have sabotaged what slim chance he still had. No, it would be smarter to pretend to behave for now and surreptitiously work on trying to get the focus mitt off his right hand first. Then, he could try to undo the chain and make his run for it then.

With his plan made, Mikey spread his feet apart and plopped his butt on the bed before swinging his legs out in front of him. After nearly four weeks of being forcibly kept off them, he needed to stretch them out and he was doing just that when he heard the door open. He whipped his head around guiltily, meeting Mai's eyes. She smiled knowingly and walked over, bowl in hand. Mikey watched her suspiciously as she placed it down near him. Water. Ignoring the pain and awkwardness of his broken arm, Mikey immediately moved to go drink, then stopped and sat again, biting his lip. He needed it so badly but didn't want her to know just how much.

"Drink," Mai encouraged with an amused chuckle. "Then we'll talk now that the drugs have obviously worn off." She reached back to pull her swivel chair closer, though keeping it conveniently just out of his reach and sat down.

Mikey canted his head, giving the Foot veterinarian a look of 'Dude, seriously?' and gestured frantically to his throat with a sour expression.

The woman laughed again, this time sheepishly, "Okay, well, I guess I talk and you answer me as best you can. I'll try to ask yes or no questions. Okay?"

His eyes narrowed, then Mikey shrugged. No guarantees, he'd see depending on the questions asked.

"Drink first," Mai encouraged again.

Mikey scowled but eased himself off the dog bed and to the water bowl, carefully leaning down to drink all the while careful to avoid jostling his aching arm. God, he hated drinking like this but what choice did he have? Let himself die of thirst? That would be stupid and no matter what everyone else always told him, he wasn't stupid.

Finally, his thirst slaked and feeling slightly better, he sat up, crossing his legs and staring expectantly at Mai. The woman gave his crossed legs a disapproving look but he just folded one arm across his plastron, the other couldn't be bent, and continued staring at her.

"Right, I need to learn about you in order to make sure of your continued health," Mai began after a moment of simply studying Mikey. "I assume you started out life as a human as Chris did?"

Mikey felt a chill at the question and simply continued staring. No way would he answer that one! If she knew the truth that he _had_ actually started out as someone's pet, he'd have absolutely zero rights! Not that he really had any rights now but things would definitely get so much worse if she knew the real truth.

"So how long ago were you mutated?" Mai asked.

Considering for a moment then figuring giving that information away couldn't hurt him, Mikey shrugged and replied, "Fifteen years ago." He felt very odd and even creeped out over the fact he couldn't hear his voice, couldn't even feel any vibrations from his throat and panic started building rapidly again. He fought frantically to swallow it back down.

"You're not human anymore," Mai reminded flatly, "therefore I cannot read your lips, Spot."

Mikey stared in sheer frustration. Well, what happened to simple yes or no questions? he wondered desperately. How else was he supposed to answer? Then, a thought hit him and he brightened. Mikey lifted his hand and tried to mime writing, looking up at Mai hopefully.

"No," Mai replied flatly, without even a pause for thought.

Mikey huffed and leant back, looking away all while carefully watching her out of the corner of his eye. Well then, if that was the case, he wouldn't bother even trying to answer because what was the point?

"Okay then... I understand and it's okay, those questions were just for my curiosity anyway. However, this next question is very important. You are obviously a reptile and yet you have many human characteristics so the question is, are you cold-blooded or warm-blooded, or something in between?"

Mikey's gaze flickered back to her and he nodded hesitantly.

"Which?" Mai prompted, "cold?"

Lifting his hand, Mikey motioned it from side to side as if to say 'sort of' and understanding filled the woman's face.

"Something in between," she concluded and Mikey nodded.

"Okay. So, do you hibernate during winter like natural turtles?"

Mikey shrugged. Not really but still, it wasn't unheard of.

They felt the cold badly, slowed down significantly from it in fact but they never actually hibernated like normal cold-blooded animals. Only once did one of them ever go into hibernation, back when they were seven or eight and that was only because Raph was so sick at the time. Mikey remembered discovering him seemingly asleep on the couch, cold to the touch and huddled up in blankets for warmth. He'd been bored and lonely at the time and had gone to wake his brother up to play, despite having been told he was sick and to let him rest. Mikey had reached out to shake him awake, only to freak out thinking he was dead and run screaming to Master Splinter. It was Donnie who first postulated that maybe he'd simply gone into hibernation from the chill, just like Raph's pet turtle Spike did and the theory seemed to be proven true when Spring came a month later and Raph woke with no ill effects but a ravenous hunger and thirst.

Mai pursed her lips as she thought. "Have you hibernated before?"

Mikey hesitated as he thought. How was he supposed to answer that one?

"I'm sorry but it truly is important, especially with winter only a couple of months away."

He lifted his hand, making the 'sort of' motion again.

"So not a regular occurrence but perhaps under certain circumstances?" Mai prompted and Mikey nodded. "Alright. So I would assume if you get too cold, perhaps even sick, then it is more likely?"

Mikey nodded again, not really certain if he should be answering such things but answering anyway.

"Alright then," she murmured, thinking. "I'll have to make some recommendations about your shelter before you move in then as I doubt Master Shredder will be pleased if your training is delayed due to hibernation. Now, food," she stated suddenly, causing Mikey to perk up in interest. He was starving! He hadn't eaten since the day before he attacked Dogpound back on the ship and he had no idea how long he'd been here since.

Mai chuckled knowingly, "Hungry, huh?"

Mikey nodded emphatically.

"Well, then, continue answering my questions and I'll see what I can do for you," she offered with a smile. "So... what kind of food do you eat?"

Mikey immediately shifted to his knees and enthusiastically mimed making a pizza one-handed; kneading the dough, rolling it out, tossing it into the air and finally sprinkling ingredients liberally all over as Mai studied him.

She smiled in understanding, "Pizza, huh?" and Mikey nodded happily, licking his lips. "I bet you must have been very good at charades."

Mikey puffed out his plastron proudly at the observation. He was the best! His brothers had no imagination. Well, Donnie did but only about boring stuff like science.

"Well, unfortunately for you, pizza will not be an option but I assume that means you are able to digest dairy and other foods that humans eat and turtles don't?"

Mikey canted his head frowning, unsure what she meant by that but tentatively nodded regardless.

"How about foods that turtles naturally eat?" Mai continued, watching Mikey closely as he suddenly stared at her warily once more. "Fish?" a nod. "Fruits and berries?" another nod, "Worms?" Mikey stilled but he nodded hesitantly, "Snails and beetles?" Mikey pulled a face in disgust. "Fungi?" Mikey blinked, unsure, then remembered Donnie explaining it was another word for mushrooms. He nodded again.

"Alright, so basically you can eat just about anything. Now, one more question before I go get you some food. Are you allergic to anything that you know of?"

Mikey shook his head emphatically.

"Okay," Mai replied. "That's about it for now. If I can think of any other questions for you that are important enough, I'll ask then. Otherwise, I'll just learn about you for myself further down the track." She stood and tucked away her chair before heading to the door. "You behave now, Spot. I'm going to have someone come in here to keep an eye on you while I'm at the mess hall."

Mikey swallowed nervously.

"Don't allow them to see you as anything but an animal or I can't protect you," she warned. And with that, she was gone.

A moment later, a Foot soldier dressed in the standard uniform entered the room, walking over to watch him and Mikey crawled backwards, not liking the creepy vibe the mask-covered human gave off.

After some time, the man moved closer and Mikey could see the corners of his mouth tug up against the full-face mask.

[So, you are one of the mutant freaks from America,] he stated in Osaka accented Japanese, a smirk obvious in his voice. [I hear Bradford-sama brought you back to be our latest plaything. Bet you'll be lots of fun.]

Mikey cringed as the soldier crouched down and reached over to lightly run a hand across his carapace, stopping only when the hand slid off where the back of his legs met his shell. He yelped soundlessly and scrabbled backwards, desperate to get the man off, yet somehow still mindful of Mai's warning.

The man chuckled in dark amusement and crouched down before him, devouring him with his hidden eyes and making Mikey feel ill.

Suddenly, to his horror, the soldier's mask covered gaze settled upon his tail and he slowly reached out. Just then, the door opened and the soldier jumped to attention, turning to face Mai. He saluted hurriedly as if caught out. [Hideki-sama!]

Her expression turned cold. [Thank you. You may leave now.]

The soldier all but ran as Mikey watched, breathing heavily in fright.

"I'm sorry if he scared you, Spot," Mai apologised in a soft tone. "Unfortunately, though I am in charge in here, I do not have a say in which guards are assigned. Due to the nature of this organisation, it's unavoidable that they recruit a lot of lowlifes."

Mikey tore his gaze from the door to fix it instead on Mai, squeezing his legs tight together to obscure his tail. 'Then why would you work here?' he wondered with a frown.

Mai suddenly smiled and put down the bowl she was carrying in front of Mikey. He looked down at it. "Evening meal has been over for hours now. Sorry, but that's all that was left."

Scraps. Literal scraps from plates. He curled his lip in disgust. Was that teeth marks in that bit of meat? Oh god! And that piece looked like it had been chewed up and spat out. Everything was mixed together and not in a good way. Cold, tough meat, vegetables, noodles and rice, even a small amount of pudding. What the hell did Mai do? Dig it out of the garbage?

He whimpered soundlessly. He was so hungry and would eat just about anything but this was just... it was too much. Mikey looked up at Mai beseechingly but she just smiled pleasantly back down at him.

"Table scraps," she confirmed. "Dogs can't get enough of them so I suggest you learn to eat them if you wish to keep up appearances and not be sent back here the minute you get out."

“But!” he protested silently, desperately wishing yet again he still had a voice. “Some of it's already been chewed!”

The Foot vet's smile turned hard. "The food has all the basic nutrients but if you prefer, despite its lack of nutrition I could just go get a can of dog food for you. I hear from Chris you learnt to eat it without complaint on the ship."

Mikey shook his head frantically and edged forward to eat, working desperately to swallow his bile.

"Good boy, Spot," Mai purred. "It was too late to get you anything else tonight but I've instructed the kitchen hands to keep the scraps for you for breakfast tomorrow. In the meantime, I'll order in some proper food for you and will start making meals specifically tailored for your needs once the ingredients come in."

As he tentatively ate the cold, congealed remains of the Foot's evening meal, trying to eat around the gross parts, a feat that was almost impossible without the use of his hands, at least it was unless he wanted to leave huge chunks of food behind, Mai walked around behind him and deftly lifted his tail. Mikey froze then turned to stare at her accusingly again.

"Temperature check," she smiled serenely. "I told you I need to check often to establish a baseline for your health."

Suddenly, the cold thermometer was inserted into his anus again and it was all he could do not to cry as he helplessly turned back to his food.

But he wasn't able to bring himself to eat again.

-:-

Sniffling miserably, Mikey lifted his head off his arm and looked around. The surgery was in darkness, Mai having presumably left hours ago, but there was still enough light from the computer screen for him to make out the faint details of the room. Pushing himself up gingerly, he peered around, searching. He couldn't see anyone, yet he was sure there was someone there. Hell, Mai herself told him he'd be watched at all times. He frowned, staring into the deepest corners of the room but still couldn't see anyone nor feel their presence. Sighing, he smacked his mouth, trying to get rid of the tacky feeling and stared over to where two bowls sat side by side, unsure if he should get up to drink or not. Finally, unable to bear the feeling any longer, he moved, edging carefully off the bed. Once more he felt tempted to just get up and walk despite the bowls being only a few feet away but his eyes drifted over to where the braces still lay out of reach, taunting him with the reminder of their presence and Mai's threat. He shuddered. No, he couldn't risk it, not yet. He'd drink for now, then crawl back to his cold bed and try to work the tape securing the mitt to his hand. Only after he got that off could he risk it.

As he reached the bowls, the scent of leftover food teased his nostrils. He stared down at it longingly; he never did finish his meal, such as it was, and he was still hungry. But what were the chances it had gone bad since? Mikey quivered in indecision. Mai was a vet and did tell him that she had a duty of care to him. Surely she wouldn't have left it overnight if there was a chance it could give him food poisoning. Unless of course, it was a way to test his limits of endurance or something. Mikey swallowed painfully as his stomach growled; he could always just eat a little to see if it was still edible. His stomach rumbled again so he moved his face toward the bowl and took a tentative bite. The next thing he knew, he found himself licking the bowl desperately for more and began to shake from shame at his dog-like behaviour.

Sometime after his shaking subsided, he looked up to the ceiling and stared longingly past it, imagining the clear night sky beyond. Desperately, Mikey howled his brothers' names silently before hanging his head again in misery. It was hopeless. Normally, Michelangelo was the very definition of optimism but right now he had none left. He would never see his home or his family and friends again, he just knew it. Tears began to flow and in the darkness where no one could see him, he didn't fight them for once.   
  
Eventually, he finally managed to pull himself together again, reluctantly drinking before limping slowly back to the bed and there he stopped, looking past it to a light-coloured patch on the floor nearby. Puppy training pads, Mai had told him, instructing him that that was where he was to go while in here. He shuddered. Unless he wanted to go in front of her in the light, he had to use them now and with this stupid mitt on his hand, it would be even harder to control his aim and avoid splashback than it had been with the plaster paws.

What, he wondered with a pang, had he ever done to deserve this life?

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to let me know what you think :-)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry, things were busy for a few days there with real-life and doing some heavy editing of the next several chapters of 'Sekai no Owari' and then I needed a break. A break in which I wrote a bit for 'AOtGO' chapter 33. Hopefully, I'll be able to finish that chapter soon. And since there are only two or three chapters left of the first main arc, I will probably concentrate on that before continuing 'Aftermath' and working on plotting the next story arc.
> 
> Long chapter is long (due to the different way I've been writing this story - which was never in chapters but as one big story). Also, fair warning, things get worse from here. Don't kill me or Mikey'll never get out of this.  
> Enjoy!

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 6

Mikey awoke the next morning to the delectable smell of bacon and eggs and his eyes snapped open in surprise. Mai stood there, smirking down at him, the bowl in hand once more.

"Good morning, Spot," she greeted cheerfully.

"Morning," Mikey mouthed back silently. His heart clenched in horror at the fresh reminder he couldn't speak anymore.

"I brought you breakfast," she stated unnecessarily. "I'll give it to you after I take your temperature and another blood sample."

Mikey's gaze narrowed unhappily. He could understand why she needed to but why did he have to be subjected to such indignity in the process when there was a much better, more humane way to do it?

Mai placed the bowl on her desk and picked up her tools before coming closer. "Now, what I need is for you to lay still like a good boy and not fight, wriggle or fidget. Each time you do so, I will wait for you to stop and the more I have to stop, the longer you will wait for your breakfast. I'm sure you'd prefer it while it's still hot, right?"

"Come on, seriously?" Mikey moaned silently. "Why can't you just stick the thermometer in my mouth like a normal person?" he begged.

"And that's another thing, Spot. You need to stop responding to me as if you were human and I could understand you."

"What?" his eyes widened in hurt and not a little helpless fear.

"I know I told you that you were safe in here and that there would be no repercussions until you left and that still holds true. However, if you don't start practising at pretending to be a dumb animal now, you won't last a day once you do leave," she explained as she slipped a blood pressure cuff onto his right arm and started pumping. "Now, to help you out and give you a sporting chance, I will no longer respond to you if you try to communicate with me in any other way than an animal would."

Mikey began to shake. Despite everything she'd done, the indignities she kept putting him through, Mai was a comfort in this otherwise bleak place simply because she did talk to him and treat him (almost) like a person. He turned beseeching eyes on her. How could he cope with living like this if he had no one to talk to?

"Please," he mouthed, begging, "don't do this to me."

But Mai had already turned her gaze away, to stare at the readings on the monitor. Finally, satisfied, she removed the pressure cuff and picked up the syringe to draw another sample before shifting to his rump.

Mikey tensed up at the contact again and she paused.

"Keep still," she commanded firmly as she waited and Mikey forced himself to relax, all the while quivering in shame and discomfort. He felt his tail grabbed and lifted again and the thermometer touch before he tensed up again with a gasp.

"Please don't," he begged miserably, knowing she was behind him and wouldn't see him trying to speak.

"Your breakfast is getting cold," she reminded him harshly and he hunkered down, forcing himself to still. Closing his eyes, he desperately tried thinking of his brothers instead, remembering the last time he hit Raph with a water balloon and forcing himself to smile weakly at the happier memory.

"Good boy, Spot," Mai said warmly as she finally withdrew the offending object a couple of minutes later, stood and walked past him.

Despairing, Mikey's eyes followed her as she placed the thermometer in the sink ready to wash and disinfect and paused to record the readings into her computer. Then smiling, Mai picked up the bowl and placed it down in front of him. Before walking away, she patted him gently on the head and Mikey glowered after her.

He couldn't keep it up for long though, he was starving and the smell of actual, real food pulled at him. To his surprise, the meal wasn't scraps this time but instead, there were a couple of slices of bacon, scrambled eggs, mushrooms and toast. They'd been cut or broken into smaller pieces and were still mixed together but he didn't care about that. Hungrily, he ploughed into it, relishing every bite. It had been so long since he last ate well that he could scarcely remember the last time - it felt like a lifetime ago, yet he knew it was only about a month ago.

"Consider breakfast a reward for good behaviour," Mai suddenly stated and Mikey's head shot up in alarm. She was freaking training him! He felt sick as the woman smiled coldly and then turned away.

-:-

Later that day, the door flew open and Mikey looked up to see Dogpound enter the surgery. The large mutant looked over at him and smirked as Mikey drew back, making himself as small a target as possible. Bradford's eyes suddenly narrowed and he turned to Mai angrily. "Where is the mongrel's collar?"

"On the bench," Mai replied coolly as she turned to face the huge dog mutant.

"Why is it still off?" Bradford growled angrily. "And why the hell are his braces off?"

"To give him a chance to heal, of course," Mai snorted. "I made sure Spot knows the consequences if he tries to stand so don't worry, he won't."

"Not good enough!" Dogpound snarled as he stormed over to the braces and picked them up. Mikey cowered back further, knowing just how rough the vengeful martial artist would be but Mai stepped in between them.

"You will not put those back on Spot until I am good and ready to let him out of my care!" she snapped. "They are poorly made and were only injuring him! Whichever incompetent buffoon made them did not even smooth out the edges! You're lucky Spot didn't get tetanus from the way they cut into him!"

Bradford growled angrily. "I don't care! This is not a holiday for the damn mongrel! It's payback for everything he and his pathetic family have done to me!"

"I understand that, Chris but I am the one in charge of animal welfare in this place and I will not allow you to subject Spot to gross negligence while he is in my surgery." Her expression softened. "I've ordered a new pair of braces made, ones that are designed better. They will be a little heavier but will have a far more secure fit than those. I noticed that the old ones were a little loose on Spot. I assume due to the fact he lost muscle mass from lack of exercise on the journey here. Unlike the old pair, the new ones will be fully adjustable. The blacksmith has assured that they will be ready and delivered in a few days. In time for Spot's relocation to his kennel."

Mikey shook in dismay. Of course, she noticed! He'd been hoping to use that fact to his advantage if it became necessary. Once again though, he was running out of time! He glanced down surreptitiously at his mitt and the tape securing it tightly to his wrist. He'd barely even managed to get the corner of the tape loose after hours of work last night. At this rate, he wouldn't make it before he was moved.

"I was told you'd also ordered new manacles for Spot as well."

Dogpound nodded and a harsh chuckle sounded. "Yes, ones the mutt won't be able to chip away at over time."

"Good. I saw the work order and requested a couple of small design changes to them," Mai stated, folding her arms as she challenged the tall, furry mutant in front of her.

Dogpound bared his teeth in warning. "What kind of changes?" he asked, scowling in annoyance.

"Airholes so Spot's skin can breathe, for one. If they are to remain on permanently, that is a must."

Mikey clenched his eyes tightly closed. He didn't want to hear this! Why were they taunting him like this? He gasped softly, trying desperately not to be noticed.

"What else?" Bradford demanded, his gaze narrowed in fury over Mai's interference.

"Bendable wrist joints with smoothed edges so he doesn't get cut by them and to allow for natural movement," she replied matter-of-factly. "I don't need him brought back here because they have rubbed his skin raw and it's become infected. You have no idea how angry I am over the fact that collar you put on him has that issue! That is something I am going to need to check on at regular intervals! Especially once he starts training and therefore moving more!" She shook her head in disgust. "At least until he develops tough enough calluses to protect him from it. Also, for the manacles to be made of a metal that will not rust."

"I respect you very much, Hideki Mai and that is the only reason I don't deal with you for your presumption in this matter," Bradford growled angrily. "However, I do not appreciate the interference over the care of my dog."

"You mean Master Shredder's dog," Mai responded coolly. She whirled around and snatched up a pile of papers, thrusting them into Bradford's hands. "These are recommendations for changes in his accommodation. Make sure they are implemented before winter. Preferably before he moves in."

Bradford leafed through them, staring in disgust and disbelief. "You expect me to coddle the damn mongrel?" he roared.

"Whatever you are trying to turn him into is beside the point! In body, he is still a reptile and if he is not kept in a warm enough environment, he could go into hibernation or worse die and how do you think Master Shredder will look upon that, especially since he has ordered Spot to be kept alive and trained?"

"Fine," Bradford acquiesced with a glower.

"Also, by the time you take him off my hands, I will have a specific diet written up for Spot. You will make sure you abide by it at _least_ five days a week and I will be checking up on him to make sure of it."

Bradford growled and turned to go. Then a thought occurred to him and he turned to glare at Mikey spitefully. "Mai, has Spot been chipped yet?"

"Not yet," she responded with a shake of her head.

Mikey's eyes widened in fright again. Chipped? What did they mean by that?

Dogpound smiled coldly and it was a malicious thing. "All pets need to be chipped. It's the law," he purred.

'I'm not a pet though!' Mikey gaped, staring in horror at his tormentor.

"I'll do it right now," Mai promised. "I assume you would also like for Spot to have a tracking chip embedded, for the off chance he somehow gets lost?"

"Of course," Bradford's dark smile widened.

Mai turned and strode across the room, coming back quickly with a hypodermic needle. "Could you hold Spot down for a moment, Chris?"

"With pleasure," Dogpound grinned, striding immediately over to Mikey.

"Just hold his arm still for now," Mai instructed, seeing Bradford about to step on his shell to hold him in place. "I'm going to give him a relaxant first. The ID chipping is simple and can easily and quickly be done, however, the tracking chip is not of the same design and I cannot use the same device so I will have to perform a small operation for that one."

"Please don't do this, Mai!" Mikey begged silently, his eyes prickling with heat. Unfortunately, Bradford saw him attempting to speak and cuffed him heavily across the head, leaving Mikey stunned and his head spinning.

"Do not hit my patient!" Mai snapped angrily, glaring at the tall mutant.

"He's a bad dog and needs to be punished," Bradford sneered unapologetically.

Mai sighed in annoyance and inserted the needle into Mikey's inner elbow, pumping him full of the drug within. Almost immediately, he felt his body become sluggish and his mind slowly become hazy like the other day, when he was originally brought in here.

"I thought you wanted him released as soon as possible?" Mikey heard Mai question after the deed, her voice starting to sound a little distant and strangely wobbly to his hearing.

"I do." Dogpound snorted derisively. As if there could be any other option.

"Well, if you injure him further, I'll only have to keep him here for observation longer," she pointed out. “Especially if he winds up with a concussion.”

Bradford was quiet and Mikey distantly thought that maybe it would be a good thing if Dogpound hurt him, if it would mean he'd stay safer for longer. He blinked blearily in disbelief over his drifting thoughts. Safer? Ha! He wasn't safe here. Hell, he'd never be safe again! Still, being in the surgery was at least preferable to whatever Bradford had in store for him. He whimpered silently, shaking with fear as Bradford leant down and whispered in his ear.

"I catch you attempting to speak again and Mai will have her test subject within a day of you being released. Understand?"

Mikey blinked once, slowly and deliberately.

"Good!" Bradford growled, digging his fingers into Mikey's good arm hard enough to leave instant bruises.

"You can release him and leave now, Chris," Mai instructed coolly as she returned with another needle, this one with a large hollow point. Mikey swallowed painfully, his eyes bulging at the terrifying sight.

She stood there watching Dogpound as he turned and stalked out, giving Mikey a pointed look as he did. Then she turned back to Mikey. "Don't worry Spot, this won't hurt. I'll just be injecting a small chip about the size of a grain of rice into you where it will sit under your flesh. Once it's in and your flesh settles around it, you won't even notice it."

“Yes, I will!” Mikey cried muzzily. “I'll know it's there.”

"Honestly," Mai chuckled, "with your scales, I doubt anyone would be able to feel the lump, even if they knew exactly where to look."

Mikey tried to reach out to stop her, giving her a pleading look but his arm barely moved. He tried again, concentrating with all his might but to no avail. Noticing his struggle, Mai smiled gently and patted his head briefly before moving behind him. Then he felt her hands on the side of his thigh and the needle suddenly poked into his flesh. A moment later, the needle was withdrawn and he felt a small lump left behind and he blinked back tears of helplessness.

Mai set the chipping needle aside and picked up a small scalpel. He felt her hands shift to his other leg and roam up close to his shell. There was a fast, sharp but otherwise painless cut and he felt something pinch his flesh and peel it away. Then something alien was inserted and the flesh released. Mai turned away again to pick up a needle and suturing thread. Next thing he knew, he vaguely felt the needle pierce his skin as she deftly sewed the wound up.

"There you go, Spot. That wasn't so hard, was it?"

Mikey whimpered silently in disagreement.

"It's up near your carapace and should barely even scar, not that you'd ever see it there anyway," Mai stated soothingly. She patted his shell reassuringly and went to go pack away her equipment. Soon after, she returned, thermometer in hand. "I'll just take your temperature again and then leave you to rest and sleep off the relaxant."

Physically unable to resist, Mikey felt the device enter him again where it was left for two long, excruciating minutes before being removed and cleaned. Then Mai left the room, turning out the lights as she went, leaving Mikey reeling in shame and self-loathing, branded, ID chipped and tagged with a tracking implant.

Just like an animal.

-:-

Mikey stiffened as he woke. There was a hand on his head. A huge, furry hand that sent chills of terror down his spine.

"Guess who gets to come home tomorrow?" a rumbling voice laughed sadistically.

Mikey opened his eyes to see Bradford directly in front of him, grinning evilly. He swallowed, trying and failing to hide his fear. Mai had removed the bandages on his legs, right wrist and neck just an hour or two ago and pronounced them healed enough to leave them off. The news had shattered him, knowing that meant he would be surrendered to Dogpound's care again sooner rather than later.

"Don't worry though, Spot, I'll let you settle in and get used to your new home for a couple of days before training starts."

' _Oh god! Oh god! Oh god!_ ' Mikey's breath all but heaved in his chest.

"We are going to have such fun! I'm really looking forward to it, aren't you, boy?"

' _No! No, I'm not!_ ' he screamed desperately to himself.

"There is a lot of interest in you throughout the clan,” Dogpound offered, “so first, I think I'll take you on a nice, long walk around the compound, show you off like the champion mongrel you are." Bradford threw his head back and laughed raucously.

'Help me! Someone, please help me!' Mikey begged internally, keeping his terrified gaze fixed on Dogpound. How the hell did he ever, even for a single minute, think that this man could have been his friend? God, he was so naïve back then! If only he could go back in time and warn his younger self to stay the hell away from him!

"What are you doing here, Chris?" a voice called wearily. "I said you could take him in the morning, not tonight."

Bradford rose and turned to face Mai, smiling like a furry shark. "Just thought I'd come visit my beloved pet, let him know how much I've missed him."

"Of course you did," Mai sighed in resignation. "Did you get those changes made to his run yet?"

Bradford's eyes narrowed dangerously, "Yes."

"Should I come inspect them now?"

"If you like. You'll find it all in order."

"Good. Now, I need to feed Spot and then lock up for the night. I suggest you go back to your quarters or whatever it is you do," Mai commanded, holding Mikey's food bowl in front of her.

Bradford turned back to smile menacingly at Mikey, then turned and left with a mocking wave, “I'll see you bright and early in the morning, Spot!”

Mai sighed and walked over, plunking the bowl in front of Mikey. "You really were foolish aggravating him the way you did in your past life. Chris won't make things easy for you, Spot, he's a very vindictive man. Probably a lot to do with the influence from Master Shredder."

Mikey looked away, wishing she would stop rubbing it in already.

"Here, eat up. You're going to need your strength tomorrow. Goodnight, Spot."

Mikey watched her leave, then looked down mournfully at his food. It wasn't awful, by any means but it wasn't nice either. It always had the look and consistency of either stew or mousse style dog food from a can but it smelt and tasted better at least. The food always contained a mixture of some kind of meat and vegetables and occasionally rice, cheese or egg and was mixed together into a sloppy puree. He closed his eyes in resignation. What he wouldn't give for a pizza right now or perhaps even the table scraps he'd had the first night here. Minus the pre-chewed parts, of course. He stared over into the corner of the room. He'd worked out a few nights ago that was where the camera recorded from, with someone constantly watching him at the other end. He'd found out the hard way after Mai expressed delight over the confirmation he was male and considering he never went while anyone was around, a recording was the only way she could have seen. After that, he was very careful to make sure his shell was turned to the camera before doing his business.

Reluctantly, Mikey leant over and ate, before hobbling slowly back to his bed. There, he curled up facing away from the camera and pulled his right hand to his mouth and started working at the tape again. Unfortunately, he had to start over from scratch as a couple of days ago Mai had discovered the corner beginning to lift and replaced the tape, cutting it off and taping around again for several layers, so that even if he managed to get one layer off, he'd have to find the edge of the next and start over again. Tonight though, he had to succeed. His life depended on it. He knew where the tracking chip was along with where the scalpels were kept and he was more than willing to cut into himself to get it out if he could just free his hand and then get the chain off his collar.

He'd been worrying at the tape for a good few hours when the door suddenly opened and the light switched on. Mikey rolled his head back to face the entrance in fright to see a Foot Soldier there, watching him. The man slowly walked toward him in a predatory manner and drew a tanto which he held firmly to Mikey's throat.

[Foolish turtle-dog,] the soldier hissed menacingly. [You think us so unaware of your pathetic escape attempts?]

Mikey swallowed, carefully avoiding letting it show that he understood every word. No one knew he was fluent in Japanese and he had no intention of letting anyone find out otherwise.

The man lifted his mask to sneer at Mikey, to let him see the disgust filling his face as if Mikey couldn't hear it in his voice or anything.

[Now you must pay the price,] the menacing figure said, reaching into a pocket as he spoke. Then suddenly he moved, stabbing something sharp into Mikey's arm.

His eyes flew wide open as a hot agony spread from the puncture point and through his arm before sweeping through the rest of his body, leaving him screaming soundlessly in wordless pain.

The soldier smirked and pulled his mask back down before leaving Mikey alone to his torment.

-:-

Mikey was panting yet wide awake when Mai entered the surgery early the next morning. The pain had been intense for hours, so strong it wouldn't let him sleep, yet not quite strong enough to knock him out.

"I'm very disappointed in you, Spot," Mai chided in disapproval as she gazed down at him, arms crossed.

Still in too much pain to try to move, all Mikey could do was lower his gaze. 'You'd try too if you were in my place,' he thought sullenly. 'So you really can't blame me for trying.'

Mai's expression softened, "Well, I guess I can't blame you for trying but I do wish you hadn't. You needed a restful night to be able to deal with what's to come. Well, it's time to get you ready for Chris. He'll be here to fetch you in a little under two hours." The woman picked up something, the shock collar, Mikey realised in fear, and knelt down beside him where she slid it under his unresisting neck and fastened it securely in place.

Then, as he was reeling from the return of Bradford's favourite torture device, Mai dragged over a large package that he eyed suspiciously. Upon opening it, she pulled out the first of the new braces. Mikey gulped and shot Mai a pleading look which she outright ignored. "They may be a little heavier," she explained softly as she fixed first the thigh section in place before fitting the shin section and connecting them with a short, thin cable to prevent him from straightening his legs, "but at least they won't cut into your flesh like the old ones, no matter how much you struggle or fight back. Also, they can be tightened or loosened as necessary to snugly fit your legs, should you lose or gain any muscle mass." Once done, the veterinarian released his leg and took the other, repeating the process gently.

Finally, Mai placed down bowls of food and fresh water. "Eat, while you still can and take the chance to get used to moving with your new braces," the woman commanded.

Struggling, Mikey tried to do as she suggested, all the while still feeling sick and in pain from whatever he'd been poisoned with in the night. Before long, however, he gave up and laid back down, trying to get some sleep before Dogpound arrived.

Then, before he knew it, Dogpound threw the vet surgery door open, grinning widely at him. "Time to go, Spot! Are you excited boy?" he laughed raucously.

Mikey refused to respond, hoping he'd simply go away or that Mai would take pity on him and say he was too sick but she just looked up at Bradford.

"Don't kill him, Chris. A dead specimen is a useless specimen and I have a lot of plans for Spot once I get the opportunity to go ahead with them."

"I'll try not to," he laughed, coming over and snatching up the muzzle from where it sat on a nearby table, "but no promises. This disgusting creature could try an angel's patience."

"Yes, I got that impression," Mai replied tiredly. "Don't put that muzzle on too tightly.”  
  
Bradford just gave her a look as he lifted Mikey's tired, unresisting head and fixed the muzzle in place, pulling tightly at the straps.  
  
“Goodbye, Spot,” Mai called, “I'll see you in a week to check on how your foreleg is healing."

Dogpound detached Mikey's chain from the ring in the ground. "Let's go, mutt!" he growled, tugging at the chain and pulling on Mikey's neck.

Mikey reluctantly pushed himself to all fours and limped after Bradford, trying to avoid placing any weight on his still broken left arm.

Before long, Dogpound led him out of the building and into the grassy yard and despite himself, Mikey looked around curiously; he'd never been outside in the daylight before. Thick forest grew close to the building, though some space was cleared around it. The trees towered over the building, giving it an almost claustrophobic feel, yet sheltered paths had been cleared immediately surrounding it. As he stared, fascinated, Bradford yanked harshly at his leash and choking, he hastened to follow, much to the laughter and jeers of dozens of Foot clustered around the edges of the paths and in the trees. Mikey glanced nervously at the humans. He couldn't see any faces thanks to the masks they wore but he could feel their disgust and curiosity, their hatred and amusement and he couldn't help but hang his head in shame. Bradford walked him too close to a pair of the dishonourable ninja and one of them kicked him as he passed, yelling out, [Pathetic, ugly mutt!] and that set the rest off, yelling slurs and hitting or kicking him as he was dragged by.

Mikey whimpered at the pain and humiliation, glad for the first time that he had no voice any more so they couldn't hear his distress and be further delighted by it.

He struggled with the walk, having not walked so far on all fours before and in fact barely moving more than a few feet in the last almost five weeks now. The new braces hurt, as unused to them as he was. His broken arm, practically dragging on the ground behind him caned and he kept almost tripping over the focus mitts still taped to his hands like oversized paws. He found himself missing the plaster paws, as at least they were less ungainly and easier to move about with, despite the fact they'd kept his hands so tightly cramped.

As the walk continued and his strength began to flag, Mikey's head hung lower. He dimly noticed the building was no longer in view and that they were now traversing a waterlogged path. He bit his lip in disgust as water and mud soaked the focus pads, leaving them feeling wet, clammy and somewhat slimy against his hands.

Finally, Bradford turned, leading him along another path, this time rough and loose stoned and Mikey winced as the sharp stones dug painfully into his knees and the small part of his shin that was still exposed. Huffing in pain, he tried to move off the path and walk beside it but Dogpound yanked him back into the path and onto his face, to the loud laughter of the Foot following them like a sick parade.

Too soon and yet what seemed like hours later, Bradford stopped before an old shed hidden in the trees that smelled of hot metal and grease, reminding him vaguely of the garage back home and making him more homesick than ever. "Ready for your latest gifts, Spot?" he asked in a mocking tone that had Mikey shuddering in fear.

Mikey whimpered silently and sat in an approximation of seiza to say, 'No, I'm not going in there and you can't make me'. However, Dogpound simply dragged him and Mikey was forced to crawl after him into the deeply foreboding, dilapidated old building or choke from the metal collar digging deeply into his neck.

A short, portly unwashed human with sweat soaking his obviously, even under a shirt, hairy back, stood facing away from them, hammering something glowing dull red from heat. Mikey wrinkled his nostrils in disgust at the smell and looked away. Unfortunately, that caused him to catch sight of the Foot brand of ownership showing just above the top of his cast and he felt the terror rise within. Surely once was enough, right? They couldn't be planning on branding him a second time, right?

He risked a fearful glance up at Dogpound to see him standing there smirking at him in dark amusement and Mikey couldn't look away again fast enough. Dogpound chuckled and tugged Mikey further in, leading him to a table near the other man.

"Get up on the table, Spot," Bradford demanded, yanking at the leash harshly enough that Mikey saw stars.

He blinked hurriedly to clear his vision and looked up at the table and then at Bradford. 'How?' Mikey thought desperately, looking pointedly to his cast arm and braced legs and hoping like hell that the evil mutant would understand how impossible his demand was. He had always been the nimblest of his brothers when it came to running and jumping but not when his movement was so severely hampered as it had been for the past month.

"Don't know, don't care, just do it," Bradford growled menacingly, twisting the chain in his hand just above Mikey's collar and making him gasp for breath as the edge of the rough metal band bit painfully into his throat. The former human chuckled above him at his distress and Mikey clenched his teeth behind the muzzle in hatred before looking around the workshop again.

Getting up on that table was bad, he knew that but then again, so was disobeying and Dogpound had shown no compunctions in holding back on the punishments whenever he tried. He let out a slow breath, trying to calm himself and think. Too bad there wasn't anything nearby he could use to help him, he thought in despair, feeling Bradford pulling impatiently at the chain again. Instead, steeling himself, he reluctantly crawled closer to the table, raising himself up onto his knees and placing his mitt covered hand on the table, hoping to push himself up like a swimmer getting out of a pool. It may even have worked, his ninjutsu training gave him the upper body strength necessary, even one-handed - his broken arm useless for the job given its inability to bend thanks to the cast - but the table was solid metal and he had no grip. The focus mitt on his hand slipped and he fell, whacking his chin hard on the table as he did.

Stunned and breathless, Mikey lay in a crumpled heap on the ground, blinking and seeing stars for the second time that day as Dogpound laughed raucously in delight above him. He was just beginning to sit up again when a sudden obsequious voice rang out.

[Bradford-sama! I am so very sorry to keep you waiting, sir!]

Dogpound wiped a tear of mirth from the corner of his terrible fur-lined eye as he turned to face the blacksmith. [It's fine, Haruto,] he laughed [I've been enjoying the entertainment while waiting.]

Mikey glared up at Bradford hatefully as the former human yanked at the chain attached to his collar again, choking him as he pulled him until he was on hands and knees once more.

[I'm ready whenever you are, Bradford-sama, I was just getting some other work done while waiting for you to arrive with the animal.]

[Let's do this then. You need Spot on the table, right?]

[Better for my back if it is,] the blacksmith agreed dismissively, arching his back, [but I can also work with the creature,] he tossed Mikey a disdainful look, [on the ground if necessary.]

Mikey fought to school his reaction. Dogpound made him try to get up there when he didn't even need to?

Dogpound's lips slowly spread into a disturbing smile and he leant down and picked Mikey bodily up by the shell, before dropping him unceremoniously onto the table. Mikey winced as a jolt of agony shot its way up his left arm. Suddenly, while still reeling from the drop, he felt cold metal clamp around his right wrist and he immediately tried to pull away. Before he could move more than a couple of inches, the short chain jerked him to a stop.

"There, that'll keep you from trying to fight back or escape," Bradford purred evilly as he cupped a hand under Mikey's jaw and tilted it up to look directly into his eyes, "not that you'd be very effective wearing those soft focus mitts," he laughed.

Mikey tried to growl but all that came out was a harsh sound of air from the back of his throat. Still, it was enough for Bradford to realise what he was trying to do and the martial arts celebrity laughed all the harder. Finally, he reached down and cut through the tape securing the mitt to Mikey's left hand as the blacksmith carefully placed a huge black metal paw with the foot clan symbol etched into the top of it on the table. He lifted the top section off, revealing a recess large enough for his curled up hand within. Mikey stared in horror before looking up at Dogpound, wide-eyed in realisation.

"Put your hand inside," the evil mutant growled as the metalworker turned away.

Swallowing, Mikey hesitantly began to do as he was told when Haruto came back, wearing a flip-top visor and carrying a clamp holding a sparking electrode. His jaw dropped as much as the muzzle would allow and he backed away, shaking his head frantically. They had to be kidding, right? Right? He whimpered silently, even as Bradford grabbed at his chain, tugging him forward again.

"Don't make me repeat myself, Spot," Bradford snarled. "You won't like the consequences if you do."

'No! Nononononono!' Mikey chanted frantically in denial. They were not welding his hands inside those things! They couldn't! It was inhumane!

Haruto looked up at Bradford as the dog mutant growled, snatching at Mikey's hand and slamming it to the tabletop. He continued holding it firmly in place as he held out his other hand. [Hammer!] he demanded. He snatched at the proffered tool, a soft-headed mallet the blacksmith held out, then smashed it into Mikey's hand. Once, twice, thrice.

Mikey threw back his head and howled silently in agony as the bones in his fingers and hand shattered beneath the repeated blows. Distantly, he felt his hand roughly picked up, threaded through something and then shoved into the blessedly cool metal paw. With tears rolling uncontrollably down his face, he was helpless as the blacksmith folded his broken fingers into the recess and placed the top back down, all while Bradford still held tightly onto his arm, only shifting the grip higher to make way for the metal sleeve around his wrist. He shook his head violently, trying desperately to pull away but the monster's grip was too strong and his hand hurt far too much. Then Haruto lowered the welding rod and began working to seal the two pieces together as heat quickly spread through the metal, burning the flesh beneath it.

"Stop! _Please_ ," Mikey gasped frantically, the breath harsh in his throat, "it hurts! _It hurts!_ "

[The dog seems to think it's human or something,] Haruto observed as he slowly worked the electrode along, creating a solid seam between the two heavy pieces of metal.

[Or something,] Bradford agreed with a cruel twist of the chain above his collar. "If Spot keeps up this inappropriate behaviour as if he was an actual person rather than the dog he is, he'll be handed over to Mai for research sooner than he expects."

The words somehow reached Mikey through the haze of pain and he tried desperately to stop speaking. Not that it was a problem much longer as the heat against his flesh reached new heights and he found himself screaming soundlessly once more.

Finally, Haruto stepped back and flipped his visor up, releasing the trigger on the clamp. He leant down with a gloved hand and inspected his work, grunting in satisfaction. [Will let it cool down before cleaning it off. In the meantime, I'll do the other paw while we're waiting.] He turned away to bring the matching metal paw, placing it on the table by Mikey's right hand and all Mikey could do was stare numbly down at it and gasping as Dogpound cut free the mitt on his other hand before releasing the manacle, confident the combined pain and weight on his other hand would keep Mikey in place.

Lightly flexing his hand, Mikey swallowed as he shakily brought it up to place in the other paw of his own volition but Bradford stopped him, snatching the appendage and slamming it to the table. Mikey stared up at Dogpound in betrayal as the monster once again picked up the mallet and gave his right hand the same treatment as his left. He smiled sinisterly as he did.

"I warned you that you wouldn't like the consequences of fighting back, Spot," he purred in delight.

Mikey shuddered in agony, trying to clamp his mouth shut to avoid wailing and giving his tormentor the satisfaction but to no avail. It was impossible.

Squeezing his eyes tightly closed, Mikey tried desperately to shut everything else out, to simply breathe through the incredible pain but within seconds, he was screaming in silence but for the sound of raw, harsh breaths as Haruto worked to seal the right paw also, intense heat seeping through the metal to his broken and swelling hand trapped tightly within.  
  
Finally, all Mikey could do was lay bonelessly slumped and heaving in agony as the metalworker finished and began cleaning up.  
  
That was when, through the haze of pain, he became aware of hot, rancid breath blasting into the side of his face. He struggled to open his eyes, only to recoil at the sight of Dogpound's furry features mere inches from his face.  
  
"Vacation time is over," Bradford sneered sadistically, "I'm going to destroy you, Spot. Piece by piece until nothing remains of you but Spot, a pathetic creature that thinks it's a dog and will do anything to please its masters to avoid further pain, no matter how impossible it is."  
  


-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome. 
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.
> 
> A/N: [ ] is translated from Japanese.
> 
> I know 'SnO' was meant to be updated first but due to being busy with other things (read: lazy) and the fact this chapter was more ready to go, I updated this first.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 7

[This is the creature you want trained?] a voice asked in patent disbelief. Twitching slightly, Mikey struggled to open his eyes to see who was talking but the effort was far too much and they utterly refused to open.  
  
[Dog,] Bradford immediately corrected.   
  
[Of course,] the stranger's voice sighed in annoyance.   
  
[I want Spot given advanced obedience training until he obeys any command without hesitation. Do whatever you need to to accomplish the goal, just make sure he lives through it. Then you can train him to do whatever the other Foot dogs do.]  
  
There was the barest shuffle of movement and Mikey breathed in sharply as a hand was lifted and turned as if being inspected, before being simply dropped with a heavy metallic thunk, causing pain to shoot through his broken and burnt hand and up his arm and he wailed and curled in more on himself in silent agony. Then the stranger's unwanted, probing hands moved to his face, lifting his head from where it laid cushioned on his other arm. Mikey tried to pull away but the grip was too strong and a thumb quickly worked its way between his lips, lifting the top one away. The thumb rubbed firmly against his teeth and Mikey all but choked in disgust, tasting the scent of stale cigarettes and dog on the man's thumb. 'Why?' he whined to himself desperately, sure he felt a bit of fur left behind in his mouth.  
  
As suddenly as his mouth was violated, he was released and his head dropped heavily back onto his arm, making his other hand cane with pain inside its metal prison. He moaned inwardly and with a renewed effort, opened his eyes to a slit to see a short, skinny Japanese man with greying hair and a Foot uniform sans the mask standing nearby and gazing down at him in disgust.

[I don't see the point of this, Bradford-sama. It has no claws or fangs,] the man said, dismissing him, [and its paws are so heavy that it will never be able to run fast enough to hunt down prey or fugitives, even if its sense of smell is sufficient for the job. Do you even know how good its sense of smell is?]  
  
[Who knows but Spot lived all his pathetic life in the sewers so I doubt it's that good,] Dogpound replied with an uncaring shrug.  
  
Mikey's gaze narrowed, 'It's good enough to smell your breath over my own fried flesh, dude and man that makes me wonder if you've ever used a toothbrush a day in your life!' he thought desperately, remembering the final moments before he lost consciousness back in the smithy. He didn't have many new aches so he guessed Dogpound must have carried him wherever here was and dropped him, rather than dragging him back.

[It's useless. Why should I waste my time training this... dog?]

[Because Master Shredder wants it done,] Bradford growled.

'And of course, you don't have any say in it at all, do you, Dogpound?' Mikey thought sarcastically, wishing he still had the ability to speak his mind aloud and point out that detail.

[Spot used to be the son of that rat, Hamato Yoshi,] Bradford added maliciously, explaining with that simple statement all the enmity The Shredder held towards Mikey and his brothers.

At those words, Mikey stiffened, glaring up at the former human, 'Used to be? I still am! Just because you turtle-napped me and are trying to turn me into a dog doesn't change that!'

[Ah, now it makes more sense,] the other man exclaimed. [Do you have a preference in how the... dog is trained?]

Dogpound's grin turned wide and full of malice and Mikey couldn't help the shudder racing through his body. [I don't care, just as long as Spot continues to live and suffers for his many, many crimes.]

'Crimes?' Mikey cried silently, indignantly, even as he was careful not to move and show he was following their conversation. It wasn't easy and it took every ounce of his will not to give himself away. 'You're the one who faked our friendship to use me! All my bros and I ever did was defend ourselves! We even tried to warn you and Fishface about the mutagen but you attacked anyway! You brought this on yourselves!'

[I see,] the stranger continued, not noticing Mikey's anguish. [Tell me, it was brought from America, yes?]

Bradford grunted a confirmation.

[Does it understand Japanese?]

[Given that his father is Japanese, I would have thought so. However, this one is too stupid and has shown no signs of understanding anyone in his time here.]

Mikey bristled slightly at the slur but kept his protests to himself; something he was well practised at. His best chance was to continue to feign ignorance. If no one knew he understood, then there was a better chance of them letting something he could use slip in front of him.

[Good. That will work in my favour. If it can't understand, that will make it easier to encourage obedience for the few things it is learning, without it being able to argue or fight back. It will be too exhausted and frustrated to do otherwise.]

The man moved out of Mikey's line of sight and while he tried to track him, it hurt too much to move. Moments later, a bowl was dropped beside the thin mat Mikey was laying on and the man reached out, pushing his face into it.

Mikey spluttered as water forced its way into his nostrils and into his mouth; he wrenched himself backwards in an attempt to break free.

[Water. Drink!] the man commanded, pushing his face into the liquid again.

"Let me go! You're drowning me!" Mikey cried silently as he struggled but his face was just pushed back into the bowl as the man repeated to drink in Japanese again.

[Why are you helping him?] Bradford asked flatly, clearly unimpressed.

[Because your 'dog' is clearly in too much pain to help itself,] the trainer replied.

[I never thought of you as soft before, Hakuba-san,] Bradford growled menacingly.

'Soft? He's trying to kill me!' Mikey cried, his struggles beginning to weaken. True, as a turtle, he could hold his breath longer had he been given the chance to hold it in the first place but he'd wasted most of it in the initial onslaught already.

[Drink, Spot,] Hakuba commanded again, pushing Mikey back to the bowl. Then he faced Bradford once more. [I have often observed sick or injured animals will not drink of their own volition and you need him alive, yes?]

Bradford was silent a moment then grunted yes.

[Then I need to help it until it can help itself.]

Feeling himself pushed down yet again, Mikey reluctantly stuck out his tongue and lapped a small amount of tepid water up, hoping it would satisfy his tormentor. Despite the temperature and the fact it tasted as if it had been sitting in the bowl for a couple of days, it felt good on his sore, parched throat. He quickly worked to lap up a little more - an act that still felt strange and wrong to him, even after having been forced to drink that way for over a month now - and felt Hakuba's grip on the back of his neck loosen.

[Fine,] Bradford growled in disgust. [So when will you start training him?]

[I already have,] Hakuba announced with a cold smile.

Mikey froze and he raised his gaze, shrinking back as it met the smirking trainer's. Then, knowing he couldn't afford for Hakuba to suspect he understood every word, he darted out his tongue and continued drinking until he had his fill before pulling away and laying back down once more, head resting on his right arm.

The two Foot continued to talk over Mikey as if he wasn't there for some time while Mikey feigned sleep. In truth even if he wanted to sleep, the dreadful pain from his broken, burned and cramped hands wouldn't have let him. He didn't know if they'd always feel so cramped in their metal prisons or if it was just from the swelling but it was extremely uncomfortable either way. He listened carefully as they discussed him and their plans for him, trying not to exhibit his dread at every word said. Especially the part where Hakuba said he'd be taking him out and teaching him to heel and respond to commands the very next day.

Hakuba knew his hands were broken, Dogpound had gleefully explained the whole 'incident', laughing raucously at the agony he'd caused Mikey in the process and yet, Hakuba still wanted him to walk around on his hands and knees despite knowing? Yes, the too heavy metal paws would offer some support like a cast would but it was far too soon and his hands weren't just broken but burnt too! Mikey was no medic but even he knew his chances of healing fast or well would be ruined with the constant pressure on them. Not that it would make much difference considering his bones weren't even set before being sealed inside. He took a sharp breath of painful realisation. He'd probably never be able to hold his nunchucks or a pencil ever again, even if he could find a way to get the damned paws off.

Finally, the two Foot took their leave with Mikey hearing a bolt driven home on the other side of the heavy door. It was only then that he allowed his emotions to well to the surface and himself to start shaking with fear, dread, misery and homesickness.

Why hadn't his family ever come?

He'd given them enough information to find him so why hadn't they made it?

It was daylight at the time, he knew that from the slit of light leaking through the bottom and seam of the door, and therefore dangerous for them but they were ninja! The best of the best, all! They would have taken the risk knowing how little time they had.

Or... could it have been that they decided he wasn't worth the risk after all? They loved him, yes but... he always did annoy them a lot and his clumsiness and inability to concentrate often screwed up missions... so... maybe... maybe they decided they were better off without him after all, rather than risking their lives for a liability like him. He sniffled noisily as he shook at the terrible thought that love and brotherhood just weren't enough.

Suddenly, he froze, hearing someone just outside the door. The sound of the bolt scraping reached his hearing once more and he lifted his head in alarm to wipe his face dry against his right arm, careful not to disturb his horribly throbbing hands.

The door opened and Dogpound's malicious, furry face appeared before he walked in, closing the door behind him once more. He dropped a bowl to the ground, as far from Mikey as he could get in the small room.

"Dinner," Dogpound growled in annoyance. "I suggest you walk over and eat it because you won't get anything else until it's gone, no matter how dry and old it becomes."

Mikey swallowed and simply stared up at the former human. That was no idle threat. After his first 'meal' back in the shipping container he'd tried to refuse to eat again - dogfood really was disgusting, even by his standards - but Bradford had just put the muzzle back on him and tried again a couple of hours later when the turtle's stomach was grumbling its protests loudly. When Mikey still refused, he'd muzzled him again and again until nearly a day later, when the food had dried in the heat of the container and was starting to go off. Then instead of giving Mikey another chance to eat of his own volition, Bradford had forced it into Mikey's mouth holding his jaw tightly closed until he'd eventually swallowed painfully, the dried bits sticking in his throat and sending him into a coughing fit. The only good thing about that was the fact that as he'd retched afterwards, he'd hacked bits onto a very displeased Dogpound. The furry villain had taken it out on him, beating him viciously but despite the pain, he'd still found it funny - besides, Raph hit him harder whenever he'd gone too far pranking him in the past. Suffice it to say, Mikey had learnt to eat quite fast after that.

"Besides," Dogpound's smile turned wide and perverse, "you'll need your strength tomorrow," he laughed, as Mikey continued to stare balefully at him. "The man I brought in before is your new training master. He will be working with you every day from now on to teach you how to be a good, obedient dog and he is well known for not holding back and for getting results. Oh, but don't fret, Spot, as your Alpha, I'll still give you special treatment each day. In fact, I look forward to it. Don't you?"

Mikey didn't respond, just continued to stare from where he lay.

"I asked you a question, Spot!" Bradford snarled and now Mikey looked away, knowing he couldn't answer with a nod or shake of his head without consequences he didn't want to face, especially right no hen he was in so much pain.

Dogpound chuckled. "I'll see you for breakfast tomorrow and that better all be gone. Oh yeah, if you need to piss or shit, do it in the sand patch outside the kennel."

Widening, Mikey's eyes shot up to Dogpound again but the large mutant turned around and exited through the door once more, leaving Mikey to wonder. For the first time, he carefully pushed himself onto his right elbow and looked around. Behind him, opposite the door his tormentors entered and left from, was another door, a saloon-style door that could swing in or out when pushed. It had a thick edge of rubber in the middle, obviously to keep the weather out and there was a thick glass window above, letting the daylight enter the small room, kennel, Mikey corrected himself with a shudder as he looked around the rest of the bleak space. The floor beneath the mat he laid on was covered with an old, dirty and almost threadbare carpet, probably placed there as part of Mai's requested changes for winter warmth, Mikey thought bitterly. That was probably the reason for the rubber seal on the door also. He then looked up and saw a small, dim lightbulb in the ceiling out of his reach. Even without the restraints keeping him to all fours he wouldn't have been able to reach without jumping; the kennel was obviously built to accommodate Dogpound's size, allowing for the mutant to easily be able to further torment him

He was curious about outside the saloon doors though, especially since he did feel an ache in his bladder now Dogpound had mentioned it, but it was still daylight out there and no way was he going while just anyone could see. Besides, he hurt too much to walk right now.

His stomach chose that moment to rumble in complaint and he looked over towards the food with a defeated sigh. It truly was better to eat it sooner rather than later but did Dogpound really have to put it so far away knowing full well his hands were freshly broken?

Of course, he did...

Bradford really was a vindictive arsehole but he shouldn't have been surprised at that, given he was the Shredder's prized pupil for so many years, at least until the man disappointed his master.

Mikey stared across the space, trying to work out how to get there. If it wasn't for his casted left arm, he could have simply crawled using his elbows instead of hands but he couldn't bend that arm. The heavy weight of the paws encasing his broken hands prevented him from being able to just shuffle over on his knees. With time, he was sure he'd get used to the weight enough to be able to do so but right now? It was hard enough to shift them, let alone lift them for an extended period of time. Not that he'd really tried. The last thing he wanted to do was feel those searing stabs of agony with any and all movement.

However, there was nothing else for it.

Mikey pushed himself up to his hands and knees, crying out silently with every movement. Panting harshly, he sat back on his haunches, not daring to move further for several minutes. Then finally, he lifted one hand and moved it forward, carefully placing it down. Shaking, he took a tentative breath and braced himself before placing any weight on it to move the next hand.

It was too much.

Mikey howled, unable to draw breath as he collapsed.

Hakuba wanted him to walk around on all fours and 'train' tomorrow when he couldn't even crawl the short distance across the room to get at his dinner? The man was insane! Even if he had mentioned giving him enough painkiller to make it possible. Mikey shook violently at the memory, breathing harshly in and out.

Walking around without feeling the pain would just make things worse! He wouldn't even notice the extra damage he was doing to himself and healing would just take that much longer! Even he knew that! And then, hell! Coming down off that pain relief after making things worse by however many hours he was forced to 'walk' would be a hundred times worse! Hakuba knew that! In fact, it had been his main selling point when convincing Dogpound of the merits of giving him pain relief for training.

But what could he do? He was in no position to refuse. He was helpless and alone. Injured, imprisoned, shackled and voiceless.

Not to mention surrounded by enemies in a foreign country.

And he could no longer even rely on Mai to help him. She'd made it perfectly clear once he left her surgery, he'd be just another exotic animal to her, one she was looking forward to studying fully the moment she was given the chance.

Breath shuddering in his plastron, Mikey stared at the yawning distance between him and the bowl once more, wishing he could straighten his legs at least and use his feet to pull it over. Still, he had to try. Biting his lower lip in determination, he worked to wriggle carefully across the space.

He refused to give Dogpound the satisfaction of winning without even putting up a fight.

-:-

Mikey woke to a foot in his plastron, kicking him into the thick kennel wall. Wheezing in agony from the sudden movement displacing his hands, he looked up to see Dogpound grinning savagely down at him. "Breakfast time, Spot!" he announced brightly, gleefully motioning across the room to where he'd placed the bowl in the opposite corner.

'Seriously, dude? Do you know how hard it was to get to last night?' he groaned, then realised darkly, 'of course you do, that's why you keep doing it.'

"Better hurry up, Spot, your new master will be here for you soon."

Mikey glowered as he watched Bradford leave. As soon as the door was bolted, his gaze shifted across the room. To be honest, he wasn't really hungry but, he realised with sudden alarm, he was desperate to pee. He'd meant to go last night after eating but he'd expended so much energy and effort just getting to the bowl that he'd fallen into an exhausted sleep where he was. Mikey glanced up at the small window letting in the morning sunlight and froze with dread. It was morning! Oh god! He'd have to go in front of whoever might be watching. Crap, crap, crap, crap!

Shaking in self-disgust for his weakness, Mikey slowly and with great difficulty worked his way along the floor, eventually reaching the door and carefully pushing it open. He blinked painfully into the bright sunlight.

Squinting from brightness he simply wasn't used to, he saw a small concrete ramp leading down and his jaw dropped in shock. He couldn't! He couldn't even walk so how was he to make his way back up afterwards? Mikey hung his head in exhaustion for a time, then looked up again, better able to see now that he'd become more used to the light. At the bottom of the ramp was a grassed area about six feet wide and thirty feet long, surrounded by thick bars anchored deep into the ground with concrete and covered in chicken wire. The enclosure was a little over eight feet high, allowing for someone to come in after him or for maintaining the area.

To the left of the kennel was a large, open sandy area for him to do his business in, in full view of the Foot compound beyond. Mikey hunched his shoulders as he looked up at the large Japanese style mansion across the yard, surrounded and shaded by the thick trees that were everywhere. Suddenly, movement caught his attention as a small contingent of soldiers marched silently across the yard on their way to who-knew-where. Mikey watched them warily until they disappeared from view, then returned his attention to the sand and swallowed painfully.

Getting down there and back up would be a nightmare but he needed to go so badly it hurt. Maybe he should just try to roll down? That would hurt like hell too, a lot, but at least it would be over fast. He began to ease his way out of the saloon doors when the subtle motion of a ninja coming to attention caught his eye. Mikey whipped his head around to see a soldier on guard, focused on him. No! He grit his teeth in frustration and not a little anger. He was to have no privacy even to go to the toilet? Fine! Shooting a glare to the guard, Mikey made his way the rest of the way out. The pressure from his bladder meant he couldn't contain it any longer so he'd just have to shield himself from full view by going as close to the kennel as he could and from that night on, make sure he went under cover of darkness so no one could make out any details.

-:-

Michelangelo lay exhausted, feeling sick and unable to move at the bottom of the ramp when Hakuba arrived sometime later. He'd managed to relieve himself, thankful that the Foot Soldier guarding him didn't move closer to watch him and had somehow crawled his way back to the bottom of the ramp and that's when he arrived at an impasse, literally unable to crawl back up. Just from the small amount he'd 'walked', his hands were caning him more than ever and just the mere thought of putting his weight on them again turned his already churning stomach.

[Spot, come!] Hakuba called from inside the kennel and Mikey winced. While he supposedly didn't understand, as far as anyone else was concerned, the use of his new name meant he was expected to respond no matter what. Well, screw that! Not only didn't he want to respond to that stupid name but he couldn't even if he wanted to. It wasn't like he had any way of verbally responding anymore, not to mention he was quite unable to get back inside anyway.

The man pushed open the saloon doors and peered out, seeing Mikey at the bottom of the ramp and concern briefly flitted across his face before quickly being covered up. [Spot?] he repeated.

Mikey blinked wearily up at him before turning his gaze away and closing his eyes again.

Suddenly he sensed movement by him and he jumped, wincing in pain. He opened his eyes again as his head was touched.

[Can't get back inside again, huh?] Hakuba asked, the barest hint of sympathy in his voice. [Bradford-sama asks a little much, I'm afraid.] He sighed at the lack of response from Mikey. [Well, it seems Bradford-sama was correct that you can't understand. Never mind, you'll learn eventually. The simple things, anyway. Wouldn't do for you to pick up on any more than that.]

'Just let me sleep,' Mikey whined to himself, closing his eyes again. 'I'm fine here, in the sun. It's actually kinda nice. Not so cold...' There was a sound of rummaging and foil being popped. Mikey frowned.

[Open your eyes, Spot,] Hakuba commanded.

Reluctantly, Mikey did as bade, not having the excuse since his 'name' was mentioned once more. He saw a small packet of painkiller in Hakuba's hand as he held it up. The brand and contents were written in Japanese of course, a combination of kanji, hiragana and katakana which he could read, though he was somewhat rusty on the kanji, but the logo itself was universal. Mikey shook his head rapidly in alarm.

[It will help. Make you feel better.]

Mikey shook his head again and closed his eyes defiantly.

"Make feel better," Hakuba repeated in halting English.

'No, it won't,' Mikey thought sluggishly, shaking his head in disagreement again, despite having been warned not to communicate like that but what other choice did he have? If only he could still talk. Mai and Dogpound had a lot to answer for.

Hakuba sighed again and all of a sudden, Mikey felt the man's fingers pushing between his lips again and forcibly prying open his mouth. He tried to pull away violently but he was too weak and next thing he knew Hakuba was tossing in two pills and holding his mouth closed.

'No! Stop!' Mikey cried mentally in panic and he desperately fought back, 'I can't...' but at that moment the man began rubbing downwards against his throat, triggering his swallow reflex and gagging, Mikey tried to stop himself but was unable. Before long, the pills went down and Hakuba finally released him. Mikey immediately tried to throw up, something that shouldn't have been too hard since he felt so ill but he had little in his stomach, having not eaten since shortly before sunset the night before and of course he couldn't stick his broken, entrapped fingers down his throat.

Hakuba immediately walked inside, soon coming back with his bowl of breakfast which he placed down beside Mikey on the grass at the base of the ramp. [Eat,] he commanded. Then repeated in English before saying it again in Japanese.

Mikey glared daggers up at his trainer but Hakuba stood over him, arms folded and uncaring as he stared down expectantly.

[Eat,] he repeated again, nudging the food closer.

Stomach twisting in fear, Mikey struggled to push himself up and lean over the bowl, figuring that maybe if he ate, at least he'd be able to throw up sooner than later.

-:-

To Mikey's disgust and fear, the painkillers worked well and fast and as soon as he'd finished eating, Hakuba clipped the leash to his collar, spoke the word [Heel] and led him up the ramp and out through the door. Mikey tried numerous times to stop and try to throw up but Hakuba simply tugged harshly at his leash, choking Mikey and continued leading him on.

Both before long and what felt like hours later, they reached a large, thickly tree-lined enclosed yard filled with obstacles, balancing poles and even some hoops. Mikey gazed around in dread, feeling sick at the sight, especially that of a small audience standing and staring expectantly at him around the outer edge of the training yard as if he were the only entertainment to be found in this dump.  
  
Knowing this place was in the middle of nowhere, he probably was...

[Sit!] Hakuba commanded, pushing Mikey's rump down. Mikey glared at the man while he turned and fixed the chain leash to the nearby fence before walking away.

Mikey sighed miserably and laid down to take his weight off his hands. The pain had diminished further as he'd walked on them to the point where there was only a dull ache to remind him of the damage done with an occasional sharper pain as he placed his weight badly. However, the ill feeling he'd awoken with that morning had only increased the longer he'd walked.

What felt like moments later, Hakuba returned. [Up!] he commanded, pulling at the lead. [Up, Spot!]

Mikey groaned in misery as he was pulled back to a sitting position. Thanks to the resulting choking, he didn't fight back but his arms quivered beneath him, threatening to give way and dump him face-first on the ground; he really hoped he wouldn't give his audience that bit of entertainment.

[Stay still, Spot,] Hakuba commanded again, holding yet another collar in front of Mikey's sight.

'Another one?' Mikey thought tiredly. 'Already wearing two, isn't that enough, dude?' Then at the sight of wicked-looking spikes pointing inwards, his eyes widened in terror. He shifted his gaze to look pleadingly up at the human and shook his head rapidly, mouthing desperately, "Please don't put that on me! I'll be good!"

Hakuba's face twisted in displeasure as he snatched at the leash again, holding it high. [Bad dog! Stay still!] he demanded as Mikey choked again at the mistreatment.

"Come on, dude, please!" Mikey begged silently, trying to lift a hand to the collar at his throat. The combination of the weight of the metal paw and the sudden sharp pain lancing through him from his weight all supported on one broken and burnt hand made him drop it again and he momentarily blacked out as the paw slammed heavily onto the ground. When his vision cleared, the new collar was secured around his throat above the older collars and the leash reattached to it with a final sounding click.

Hakuba began to walk, commanding [Heel, Spot!] as he did and feeling the spikes pressing dangerously into his tender, abused throat, Mikey rushed to join him, shivering violently in the warm sunlight.

After numerous harsh tugs and pulls when Mikey didn't respond to various simple commands, he just started to obey when they were spoken, too tired to fight or feign ignorance any longer. It didn't help feeling blood trickle slowly down his throat or the fact he felt so awful and freezing cold. He lost track of time and one moment began to blur into the next until finally, his hand turned underneath him as he put it down onto a rock and he stumbled. Hakuba demanded for him to get up again but try as he might, he couldn't. His arms and legs felt like jelly even as sweat poured off of him and he shivered with cold.

The trainer reached down, touching Mikey's forehead and he couldn't help but subconsciously lean into the warmth of the hand. He was vaguely aware of a sharp intake of breath and then a yell, before being picked up moments later and carried off at a run.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome.
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Possible trigger warning for this chapter for implied situations.
> 
> Thank you everyone who has commented, favourited or followed this story. I appreciate you all :-)

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 8

Surrounded by warmth, a strong antiseptic smell and the quiet yet familiar tapping of fingers on a keyboard, Mikey worked to blink open his eyes and look around. To his surprise and fright, he found himself back in the vet surgery laying on the low dog bed he'd spent nearly a week on with a warm blanket draped over him and a drip inserted, taped down into his right elbow. Blinking in confusion at how and when he came back here, Mikey swallowed painfully. Man, but his throat was sore, both inside and out and his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth.

Weakly, he tried to push himself up, crying out silently at the pain lancing through his hands and collapsing again as they gave way beneath him. The typing stopped and Mai was on her feet, rushing toward him.

"You're awake at last," she said in relief as Mikey gazed blearily up at her in confusion. "You've been unconscious for three days, Spot. We almost lost you."

'Three days?' Mikey stared in shock. Then he shuddered as the rest of her words hit him. 'Almost lost me? What? Why? How?'

His look of alarm must have communicated itself to Mai because she decided to explain further. "I believe infection began setting in from the burns and broken bones in your paws," she said softly as Mikey turned his head to stare down at the paw nearest him, his right one, in disbelief. "Chris is a fool! Those were meant to be lockable, not sealed by being welded together! Apparently, he had it changed because you kept trying to work yourself free of your previous restraints and he decided not to take the risk going forward.”

Mikey's glower darkened.  
  
“Unfortunately, that means it is not possible to treat your paws properly. Thankfully, they do have slits for allowing air in and because of this, I have repeatedly soaked your paws in an antiseptic solution to disinfect them while you have been unconscious."

'That explains the smell,' he realised with another shudder.

"I've also been giving you doses of the antibiotics I know work on you. Thankfully, that has been enough to bring your fever down. However, I can't do anything to set the broken bones," she continued apologetically. The woman then reached over to bring the nearby bowl of water within Mikey's reach and waited while he thankfully drank, soothing his dry throat. When he finished, she started talking again.

"And that brings me to another problem. Hakuba-san gave you some painkillers to enable you to walk - a very ill-conceived notion considering your condition at the time."

Mikey nodded emphatically, then froze in fear as he caught her stern, warning look.

"Hakuba-san mentioned how you fought against taking it, that you kept trying to throw up afterwards. Did you know that medication was poisonous to you?"

Mikey hesitated, then blinked once, very deliberately. Donnie had long drilled it into them not to take untested medication, even simple headache tablets, as they were designed for human use, not mutant turtle use. Thanks to the human part of their DNA, his brother discovered after much careful testing that much of it was fine for them to use but many others were not and the side effects could either just make them sick or worse, potentially kill them. He'd known the brand Hakuba showed him to be one of the latter and that was why he'd fought so hard against it.

"Right..." Mai muttered. "I'm going to have to test common medications thoroughly in case you ever need any."

Mikey shrank back, eyes wide with terror. He so shouldn't have nodded! Now she had the excuse she needed to experiment on him, no matter if it was for his own safety in this particular case.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to use anything on you until I know it's safe for you. I'll take more blood to test while you are here," Mai reassured Mikey gently with a pat on his head. "Now, thanks to your injuries, you'll be staying here for a few more days. I can't have you walking around while your paws are in such grievous condition and I don't trust Chris to look after you properly in the meantime."

Mikey's gaze darted frantically around the room. He wasn't safe here by a long shot but he was better off in here than out there. At least Mai cared a little. Then he froze again, horrified by his traitorous thoughts. No, she didn't care, she just didn't want to damage her precious specimen and that was all he was to her, he reminded himself with another shudder. A specimen to be studied once the opportunity finally came. He had to stop letting his guard down around her before she used it against him to get that chance.

"You know, after I stabilised you, I took x-rays to see how badly your paws were broken and decided I may as well also take one of your left arm, to see how that is going while I was at it," Mai suddenly stated excitedly. "It's healing at an incredible rate! Far faster than humans or other animals normally heal. I assume that's the mutagen in your system at work?"

Mikey just stared up at her, shaking slightly and refusing to respond for his own sake. He and his brothers always had healed faster than humans, something their father was constantly amazed at when they were little and just one small part of why he feared them falling into the hands of human scientists.

"At the rate your arm is healing, I'll probably be able to remove the cast in another two or three weeks," Mai gushed enthusiastically, rubbing her hands briefly. "This raises so many possibilities. If I can just isolate what it is that enables to you heal at such a rate, think of all the good it could do for the Foot!"

'Yeah, because forget everyone else outside of your evil organisation,' Mikey snorted to himself, turning his head away from her again.

"I tried asking Chris for a sample to compare to but he refused. Oh well, I'll just have to try again later. Maybe after the next time he displeases Master Shredder. Something he's done a lot since first meeting you, Spot," Mai smiled; it wasn't a pleasant sight.

Mikey shuddered. Yeah, so he gathered from what the bitter former martial arts hero often claimed.

"Well, that's something to look forward to at least. Oh, do you need to urinate?" she asked, picking up a large bowl and bringing it close.

Mikey stared back up at her in disbelief, mouth agape.

"Because I was serious before. I don't want you moving around and putting any weight on those forepaws of yours. As a result, you'll notice your leash is much shorter this time."

Mikey turned his head to see she was right. In fact, there were two chains leading from what he assumed was the collar on his neck, one each leading to rings bolted to the floor on either side, giving him wriggle room but not enough to even get off the matt. Tears threatened but he blinked them back rapidly. He wouldn't cry in front of this woman or anyone else in this horrible place for that matter!

"Needing help is nothing to be ashamed of Spot, it's a natural bodily function."

Unable to express himself any other way, Mikey bared his teeth and turned away. Like hell would he ever allow her to help or even see!

-:-

Another week of humiliation and questions he could only answer though blinking passed before Mai deemed Mikey healed enough to be released from her care back to his kennel. However, it was with the strict instructions that he stay off his paws as much as possible and that neither Bradford nor Hakuba were to take him out of his kennel for training until she approved. That didn't mean, however, that they couldn't come into his enclosure and torment or train him in other ways.

Hakuba, in fact, decided to take it upon himself to train Mikey to only be allowed to eat upon command, punishing him with the shock collar or his belt strap if he tried to eat without permission or if he didn't eat immediately when told to, no matter what the dish was. He even went so far as to taunt him with treats such as pizza a couple of times, having found out from Mai's file on him that that was something Mikey loved. Then, to make matters worse, he moved on to toilet training, forcing Mikey to suffer for hours with a full bladder before allowing him to go in front of curious onlookers. To his chagrin, Mikey had discovered on his first night back that even at night, his sandpit was lit with a floodlight, affording him no privacy even then and he burned with anger, shame and hatred towards his captors.

Then came other typical dog training. That of learning to sit, lie down and roll over on command. Anything that didn't involve actually walking around and putting weight on his hands for long. All done on the grass of his enclosed run where anyone could watch and laugh, provided they didn't have other things they needed to do. Often, Mai even came along to watch, ostensibly to make sure Hakuba and Dogpound weren't disobeying her orders of Mikey keeping off his hands.

After the cast on his arm was finally removed, Mai gave the go-ahead for Hakuba to take Mikey from his run, as long as he took it easy to begin with and that's when the training to heel and then fetch began anew.

Mikey was tired. The day had been long and hot and it was his first full day of training after taking it slow for the last week. He hadn't been allowed to sit or lay down since being taken from his kennel soon after dawn, nor had he been allowed to relieve himself. Any time he tried to sit while Hakuba worked with actual dogs in front of him was met with his shock collar being activated by a maliciously grinning Dogpound at Hakuba's request. He stared longingly over at the trough of water, desperate for a drink but even had he been allowed to move from the spot, the muzzle, which was now always on when he was removed from his kennel, other than when 'playing fetch', was tight enough to prevent him from doing so. A quick jolt of electricity suddenly arced through his neck again, causing him to gasp and stumble.

"Eyes on your training master, Spot!" Dogpound growled gleefully and Mikey stiffened, quickly getting back to his hands and knees lest he be shocked again for being too slow and tried to focus on Hakuba again as he trained yet another dog in an advanced technique. He shook in anger. He knew he was supposed to watch to learn what was expected of him but it was too much. Mikey wobbled on his feet as his vision swam alarmingly. He needed to rest and drink. They seriously couldn't expect him to continue like this in this heat. Hell! He wasn't even used to the blazing sun, having spent all his life in the sewers and only coming out under cover of night more recently. It may have been Autumn but this part of Japan was experiencing a late last-ditch heat-wave, as he'd heard a couple of Foot Soldiers complaining about as they pulled their all-cover black uniforms away from sweat-drenched bodies when passing his run yesterday afternoon. He'd just been glad of the shade from the trees surrounding him at the time. It was much cooler in the shade than inside the kennel itself.

With his eyes glazed over, he didn't notice Hakuba finish working with the actual dogs until the human was in front of him, pulling the muzzle free from his face. He blinked sweat from his eyes rapidly and looked up expectantly at the man who simply stood there, watching him in return.

[Drink!] Hakuba commanded, unclipping the leash from his collar.

'Oh, thank god!' Mikey thought desperately, immediately racing over to the trough as fast as the pain and heavy weights on his hands and legs would allow. He'd only had a couple of mouthfuls, his mouth fully in the trough instead of lapping it up like expected of him when Hakuba appeared at his side.

[Leave it!] Hakuba demanded angrily. [Back away and sit!]

'What?' Mikey glared up at him in disbelief, refusing to back away as told. He was far too thirsty.

[Back up and sit!] Hakuba repeated darkly. [If you are not going to drink like the dog you are, you will not drink at all.]

Mikey felt the fury at the unfairness rise within. "I can't get enough by using my tongue," he protested voicelessly, "and you haven't let me drink all day, dude!" He bared his teeth a moment, then quickly returned to the trough, drinking once more. At that moment, he felt the leash snap back onto his permanent collar and yanked, before a faceless soldier dragged him away, returning him to his kennel for the night without dinner.

-:-

Michelangelo awoke the next morning, stomach aching with hunger as Bradford threw the door to his kennel open with a maliciously wide grin. He shuddered in fear at the sight and fought not to draw away; it always made things far worse when he did.

"Change of plans, today, Spot," Bradford growled with pleasure as he came at him with his muzzle and leash. Trembling, Mikey stayed his ground as the mutant dog put them on him, pulling the straps of the muzzle as tight as he had when they were back on the ship. [Heel, Spot,] he demanded, using the command he'd been trained to respond to over the last few days.

'What about breakfast?' Mikey thought desperately, starving through lack of dinner the night before. He looked towards where the bowl was usually placed.

[Heel!] Bradford growled again, tugging painfully at him. "You really are a stupid mongrel, Spot. Even the most stubborn dog learns faster than you!"

Mikey bared his teeth beneath the muzzle, not caring if his captor saw or not.

"You really shouldn't have disobeyed yesterday, or shown you were anything more than a stupid mutt by trying to talk back," Bradford continued mockingly as he led the way from the building, making a shiver race down Mikey's shell. To his horror, that was when he realised he was being led back towards the main building, where the vet surgery was.

'Oh god! No! No! Please don't take me to Mai!' he cried mentally, the terror rising within. He pulled away, ignoring how the collar cut into his throat and choked him but Bradford merely pulled back, dragging him along the ground and laughing.

"Yes, as a consequence of your bad behaviour, Mai gets free reign to do with you as she pleases today," Bradford crowed with pleasure. "You should hear some of the exciting plans she has for you. She's told me about them often."

'Nonononono!' Mikey cried to himself in distress, scrabbling wildly at the ground with useless paws to escape.

"Be thankful, mongrel, she said she'll be going easy on you for your first session," Bradford continued taunting him. "In fact, I believe you'll be in for quite a treat, perhaps even some pleasure at the end!" He roared loudly with laughter.

All too soon, a half-conscious Mikey was dragged up the steps and along the hallway to the surgery where Bradford knocked on the door before simply opening it and dragging Mikey inside.

Inside, Mai stood, beaming excitedly at Bradford. Mikey immediately pressed himself to the floor, instinctively sticking his legs out to catch the doorframe. Unfortunately, two Foot Soldiers standing outside each grabbed a foot, freeing his hold on the door and flinging him inside.

"Lay the animal on its side on the table, Chris," Mai commanded, referring to him as if he were an object instead of a sentient being. "Soldiers, come inside. I want you to hold it firmly in place so it can't move."

Still fighting desperately against Dogpound, Mikey felt hands grab hold of him. They lifted him into the air, all but dropping him onto the cold metal table. There, he was roughly grabbed and turned onto his left side. Straps were pulled tightly across him, securing him in place as best they could, all while the two ninja continued to hold him while he struggled valiantly.

"I suggest you stay still, Spot," Mai warned sternly. "This will hurt as I will not be giving you any anaesthetic and I would hate for you to be paralysed because you fought back like the idiot Chris suggests you are."

Mikey's eyes widened in horror. 'Paralysed? What are you planning to...' Suddenly, he felt something cold and damp wiped against his neck where his spine met the rim of his shell, followed by a painful prick of something, a large needle being inserted. "AH!'' he gasped in agony. He tried to turn his head but the tight strap holding it down prevented him from doing so.

"Lumbar punctures aren't normally performed so high up on the subject but unfortunately, the shell on this one makes it impossible to go any lower," Mai explained to, Mikey assumed, Bradford.

"Can't you just remove the shell? No other dogs have them."

Mikey's eyes widened again in terror and if he'd been capable of whimpering, he would have done so. Loudly.

"Not without killing it," Mai replied distantly as she worked behind Mikey. "Here, Chris, do me a favour and place this container on my desk carefully while I draw another sample."

In the end, five samples in total were taken with Mai moving the syringe twice to other locations higher on Mikey's neck. He wasn't sure if it was necessary to do so much but he would have bet it wasn't, that she was only doing so to torture him further. Finally, after feeling a bandaid placed on the final puncture site, Mai walked past him to clean up her equipment and put her samples away as he was left laying, trembling in place.

Finally, the vet returned. "Remove the animal's leg braces and turn it onto its shell. Make sure the straps are firm but do not strap its head down yet."

The two Foot Soldiers worked quickly to do as bade and Mikey's vision swam before him from the growing headache and sudden movement. He fought weakly against the straps again but they were tight and felt like they were cutting into his flesh.

'Someone help me...' Mikey moaned pitifully to himself as Mai entered his vision again, smiling happily. She reached down to ease his head up and undo the straps of the muzzle before turning to face Bradford, suddenly annoyed.

"I thought I already spoke to you about how tight you always put this on," she chided, bothered by seeing the deep indentations in Mikey's face where the straps cut in.

Bradford grunted, "It was punishment. Can't expect me to take Spot's misbehaviour lightly."

Mai sighed exasperatedly. "There is punishment and then there is unnecessary cruelty. You need to learn the difference, Chris."

"There's no blood, is there?"

"No," Mai conceded with another sigh. “Not this time.”

"Then what does it matter?" Bradford growled. "Maybe next time Spot will rethink his disobedience. Especially after today. Though somehow, I doubt it. He's far too stupid," he added, sneering down at Mikey.

"Well, I don't think it takes much excuse for you to mete out punishment, Chris," Mai scowled. "And quite honestly, not feeding it in preparation for today's session would be punishment and deterrent enough, without adding in needless torture on top of that."

Mikey blinked as he wriggled his jaw around, trying to get the blood flow and feeling back. So that was why he hadn't been fed? Part punishment and part... he swallowed uncomfortably, partly for today's experimentation.

"You're entitled to your opinion Mai but you will not change mine. Spot is in my charge. You are only in charge of his health and I will treat him as I see fit as long as he is alive and in somewhat decent health. Now just get on with your job."

Anger filled Mai's eyes and she retorted, [Hai, Bradford-sama!] Then, turning to Mikey again, she commanded, "Open your mouth, Spot."

Mikey stared up at her for a moment, then thinking better of it, reluctantly opened his mouth, only to see a speculum similar to the one she had used on him when she paralysed his vocal cords all those weeks ago. "No, not that thing again," he whispered silently in terror.

Mai's expression turned cold. "And with that, Spot, you have just earned yourself another session with me later this week. Thank you for your donation towards science."

Mikey looked at her pleadingly, opening his mouth to beg when she countered with, "Do you want to make it another two sessions? I really wouldn't mind. I have a lot of research I've been anxious to get on with."

'No...' he thought to himself, closing his eyes in defeat and opening his mouth as commanded. A moment later, he felt the device inserted into his mouth, two solid metal plates against his upper and lower teeth and a third smaller one extending out to press his tongue to the bottom of his mouth. The straps were tied firmly behind his head and the wheel cranked, prising his jaws apart until it bordered on painful. Then, and only then, was his head strapped down against the table so he couldn't move it.

"Comfortable, Spot?" Dogpound guffawed from somewhere behind Mikey. Mikey didn't even bother to open his eyes. He didn't want to see or give the monster behind him any extra satisfaction.

Suddenly, he felt something pass through his mouth and slide into his throat and remembering last time, he panicked. His eyes shot open and he bucked, his breath wheezing in distress as he stared up with bulging, terrified eyes at Mai.

"Settle down, Spot," she warned. "There is nothing to worry about."

'Like hell, there isn't!' Mikey screamed mentally, wriggling ineffectually where he lay. ' _Get it out! Get it out! Get it out!_ ' he begged, gagging on the foreign object as it continued its inexorable slide down inside of him.

"It's just an endoscope, Spot," Mai soothed distantly, talking to him once more. "A camera with a tool for taking samples so I can explore your insides without cutting you open to get at them. I'm sorry that I can't give you the paralytic I gave you last time to keep you still but it would interfere with the results of the final test I need to perform today."

"Added bonus of giving him space to panic," Dogpound mocked loudly in delight.

"If you can't keep your unhelpful comments to yourself, Chris, you can leave," Mai warned flatly as she focused on her computer screen. "As you already admitted, I am in charge of its health and this surgery is my domain. Despite outranking me, you have no say in here."

Mikey's eyes darted around wildly, seeing how the Foot Soldiers too were enjoying themselves at his expense.

"Seriously, Spot, this will go far easier on you if you calm down and keep still," Mai suggested without even glancing his way.

But Mikey couldn't. Not with that thing inside of him working its way slowly down his throat. His breathing hastened uncontrollably as his breaths turned shallow and he couldn't get enough air, even with his mouth forced wide open.

Mai stopped pushing the device down his throat, letting it just sit there in place as she waited. While it didn't make things feel any better, neither did it make it worse and the stillness of the thin cable made it easier for him to get used to its presence and slowly, finally, Mikey's breathing calmed again.

"I'm starting again. Stay calm," the veterinarian warned quietly.

"Or don't," Bradford laughed again. "It's much more entertaining watching you squirm and panic, Spot."

Mikey scowled as best he could with his face spread the way it was and Mai whipped around in anger. "Get out, Chris! You are no longer welcome in here while I am operating."

Bradford stood up, glaring in shock. "You can't order me around, Hideki Mai! I am your superior!"

"Not in this surgery, you are not!" she retorted furiously. "You are making my job harder by both antagonising the subject and distracting me! Foot Soldiers, remove him!"

Dogpound stared at them in disdain. "You know I can wipe the floor with these pathetic little nobodies, even in this slow, clumsy body your 'subject' gave me!"

"Then I will just go higher up the chain of command," she retorted, getting up and walking out of Mikey's range of sight. His sensitive hearing recognised the sound of her pressing buttons on a phone.

"Fine, I'll leave but you better not coddle the damn mongrel."

"Wouldn't dream of it," she fired back immediately.

"I'll be watching from the security room!"

"As long as it's not from in here!"

Bradford growled and slammed the door behind him as he left and Mai returned to Mikey's side, seething quietly as Mikey searched her face. He couldn't understand her. One minute she was indifferent to him and the next, seemed to sympathise but he couldn't tell if she truly felt sorry for him or if it was just because of a love of animals that somehow, partially extended to him, despite him not being just an animal. And yet, she was still Foot and relished the job that allowed her to do things she'd never legally be allowed to do otherwise. He tried to communicate to her with his eyes, hoping that sympathy might lead to her stopping what she was doing but it was not to be and he gagged again as he felt the tube begin sliding down inside him once more.

Nearly two hours of uncomfortable probing and sample taking passed before Mai was satisfied and pulled the endoscope out. Not a word had been spoken in all that time, not even from the silent Foot Soldiers nearby.

When she was done, she stalked away and Mikey could hear the fridge door open and water being poured. His throat felt irritated from the violation and just like yesterday, he was thirsty as well, having not had a chance to drink since being so rudely woken today.

[Take a break, Soldiers. You have thirty minutes before I want you back in here,] Mai called tiredly from across the room.

[Hai, Hideki-sama,] one answered cheerfully. Mikey couldn't tell which.

[What about the... dog?] the other asked warily.

[Leave it. It's fine where it is,] Mai replied and Mikey bristled. He wasn't fine. His body had been violated twice and he was hungry, thirsty and needed to pee so badly it was an effort not to wet himself and most of all, he just wanted to be able to move. By now, he'd happily have taken the chance to even crawl around on all fours in his enclosure with the whole compound watching and taunting him.

[Would you like us to send someone in to guard it in our place, Hideki-sama?]

[No need. It can't move anyway.]

Anger flashed in Mikey's eyes and with his mouth still forced wide open, he struggled to swallow his anger back down. Heck, his mouth was too dry to swallow anyway and it the longer it was forced open this way, the more it hurt!

The door closed as the two humans left and he was left alone in silence with Mai somewhere in the room, unable to do anything but stare towards the ceiling or close his eyes so reluctantly, he chose to do just that.

Sometime later, Mikey felt more than heard movement by his side and his eyes flashed open again to see Mai studying him thoughtfully. She gave him a half-smile and asked, "Thirsty?"  
  
Mikey was so desperate he tried to nod until he remembered that was a punishable offence for him and for the first time that day, he found himself grateful for the strap holding his head firmly in place. Instead, he blinked, fully aware that while answering like that wasn't dog-like behaviour either, at least Dogpound had never actually banned it.  
  
"Good. Blink when it's too much and you need me to stop or slow down," Mai replied, holding up a bottle of water.  
  
Mikey blinked once again and suddenly her hand was hovering over his open mouth and she dropped something inside. A couple of pills of some sort, he realised with panic as he felt them hit the back of his mouth, 'What are those?' Then the woman tipped the bottle, slowly pouring liquid into his wide-open mouth.  
  
Being unable to move his trapped tongue made it hard to swallow, not that he wanted to with those unknown pills in his mouth. Distressed again, he tried to expel the pills and therefore the precious water but Mai slowed down, not allowing the water to fill too much of his mouth.  
  
"Just let it flow down, Spot."  
  
Mikey blinked twice in quick succession desperately. He wouldn't!  
  
"Let it go down and I'll remove the speculum."  
  
'You're insane!' Mikey screamed to himself; he'd had enough. 'Last time someone made me swallow pills it nearly killed me!'  
  
"You know I wouldn't knowingly give you anything that will cause you harm," Mai soothed as if she'd been able to read his mind.  
  
'Bullshit, lady! Everything you've done has harmed me one way or another from the start!' he spat mentally as he choked, hating that he could feel the cool, soothing water slipping down his throat yet was unable to do anything to stop it.  
  
"That's it," Mai soothed gently. "Drink up, let it flow. Good boy, Spot." She watched him as he breathed harshly, trying to get his breath back. "Do you want some more?"  
  
Damn it but he did. He was still desperately thirsty and fighting tears of frustration, he managed to blink once deliberately.  
  
Finally, a few minutes later, the vet removed the speculum and the strap holding down his head. Then patting his arm as he worked his jaw, she moved away again. Frustrated beyond belief, Mikey lifted his head and thumped it back hard against the metal surgical table before turning his head and staring miserably in the opposite direction of where Mai went.  
  
Suddenly, the door opened and Mikey's eyes widened in fright as the two faceless ninja entered and reported back to the woman.  
  
[Keep an eye on it but relax. Let me know the moment you see any effect.]  
  
'Effect?' Mikey wondered, feeling a terrified chill race through him again. 'What effect? What did you give me?'  
  
[Hai, Hideki-sama!]  
  
[Feel free to stimulate it to speed up the process.]  
  
Mikey picked up his head again and slammed it back down to catch Mai's attention, then fixed her with a desperate questioning look. ' _What_ did you _give_ me?' he repeated, hoping she'd suddenly be able to read his mind again.  
  
Mai pursed her lips a moment. Then, "Do you know what Viagra is, Spot?"  
  
Mikey stared in confusion and then blinked again, once.  
  
"Well, what I gave you is not that but it's based on it and it should have a similar effect on you," she explained with a serene smile. "This drug has been engineered specifically for your biochemistry based on the blood samples I've taken from you and unlike Viagra where it won't work on someone who is not sexually excited, this one is guaranteed to bring you to attention whether you want it to or not."  
  
Mikey's jaw dropped in horror. 'I don't want my private parts out in front of you or anyone else!'  
  
"I need a semen sample," Mai explained with a shrug. "This is the only way since I somehow doubt you'd give me a fresh sample otherwise. Besides, you haven't let me properly study that part of you before now so I aim to rectify that lack of basic knowledge in the process.”  
  
Mikey shuddered in disgust and horror. Well, besides the embarrassment of being fully on display when his penis engorged to a point he could no longer keep it contained in its hidden pouch, she was going to dip out on what she wanted because even if he had use of his hands, he wouldn't have masturbated in front of them. They were therefore at an impasse.  
  
"Don't worry, Three-Five-Eight here is apparently very skilled and will help you relieve yourself."  
  
One of the Foot Soldiers gave him a jaunty wave.  
  
"He's been admiring you since you arrived and has been looking for a chance to indulge his curiosity. This is the only way I will allow him to do so."  
  
A nightmare, Mikey realised, mortified and terrified. He was trapped in a nightmare he was never waking up from.  
  


-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fandom Announcement! - 13 Days of Halloween is on again this year! Writers and Artists are welcome. For more information, look for sampsonknight on Deviant Art or https://tmnt-allstories.tumblr.com/


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: M for occasional language and non-con situations. Also see other warnings.  
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.   
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU. 
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for this chapter. There's nothing too detailed but it's there and upon reflection, I decided to up the rating because of this chapter.
> 
> Also, several of you have asked for me to show his family coming for him and I'm sorry but since this story is from Mikey's PoV until it absolutely can't be (and it's already written), I won't be showing from theirs. Still, it won't be too much longer until we see them.
> 
> And good news for anyone following 'AOtGO'. I've finally finished and typed up the next chapter. I'll post it sometime in the next few weeks, once I'm happy with the editing because it definitely needs much touching up XD
> 
> Fandom Announcement! - 13 Days of Halloween is on again this year! Writers and Artists are welcome. For more information, look for sampsonknight on Deviant Art or https://tmnt-allstories.tumblr.com/

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 9

The next morning, Bradford turned up with his first meal in two days, glancing at him in disappointment before leaving him to eat in peace after giving finally his permission. Afterwards, Mikey slipped outside to relieve himself, hiding from view as best he could and then laying down on the grass to bask in the dappled sunlight shining through the trees. Occasionally, random ninja would wander past, mocking him for finally proving he was the 'animal' he was made out to be and Mikey did his utmost to ignore them. Not long later, Hakuba turned up, commanding him to come. Sighing in resignation, Mikey reluctantly pushed himself up, wincing at the persistent headache he'd had ever since Mai drew fluid from his spine and walked into the kennel as fast as his still healing hands and the metal paws allowed, too ashamed over yesterday's 'display' and its consequences to meet the dog trainer's eye.

[Sit, Spot!] the man commanded, accompanying his verbal command with a series of clicks from a handheld clicker.

Mikey quickly did as he was told and sat as patiently as he could, staring vacantly at the door as Hakuba fixed first the muzzle in place and then the collar with the inner spikes. Oh, how he hated that thing! It hurt so much whenever he didn't move fast enough, causing it to jab painfully into his neck. It occasionally drew blood when it dug in hard enough but Mai never complained about its use seeing as Hakuba would treat and bandage any cuts incurred when returning him to his kennel after training.

Suddenly, Mikey heard a fast double click, the new command for 'heel' that the man had started drilling into him two days ago. As Hakuba began to walk and Mikey quickly stood on all fours to trot after him, he noticed an uncomfortable, tight feeling building in his nether regions again. His eyes widened in terror, remembering this was how it began yesterday while he was helpless on his shell on that cold, metal table surrounded by crazy paedophiles. 'No! Not again!' Mikey wailed internally, squeezing his eyes closed at the memory of the hands on him, working him until he thought he'd go crazy with fear, shame and hatred, all so Mai could get her 'precious sample' and take a good look afterwards.

How could this be happening again? He thought it was finally over! The drug had finally worn off a couple of hours after sundown the previous night, allowing him to get more comfortable and tuck his manhood away at last! He stopped walking, trembling in the doorway as his breathing began to quicken in line with his renewed panic. He couldn't go out there! He couldn't be seen by his captors again! Not with that about to happen to him yet again!

Hakuba clicked the device twice again but Mikey refused to move. [Heel!] The man demanded harshly but the tight feeling within his protective pouch continued to grow and Mikey gasped as his penis began to force its way free of its confines, even while he tried desperately to fight against it. He hunkered down desperately as Hakuba pulled hard on the lead, digging the points of the prong collar painfully into his neck. Mikey stared up plaintively at Hakuba, begging him with his eyes to let him stay just this once and the man simply looked at what he was trying to hide and grunted.

[You are nothing more than a useless, good for nothing dog. Property of the Foot. You will heel or you will face punishment far worse than merely having Viagra mixed into your food.]

'Mixed into my...? Are you serious, dude? Why?' Mikey stared, his face betraying the fact that he understood every single word.

Hakuba grunted again in displeasure, though no surprise. [So, you have been merely pretending not to understand all this time,] he stated. [That makes sense, considering your previous owner was the heir to our rival clan. I will have to spread the word for everyone to limit the amount they speak in front of you beyond the simple commands you are trained to obey. No matter how long it takes, you will learn your place, dog!]

Mikey stared up at the man, quivering in horror at the thought of no one speaking to him at all ever! He was a social turtle who thrived on attention and contact, needing others to acknowledge him for his own sanity, even in this awful place! Even the constant jeers and taunts of the enemy were better than being shunned as if he were a simple animal that couldn't understand so what point was there in talking to it. His face crumpled in terror of being otherwise completely ignored.

[Heel!] The cruel animal trainer repeated harshly as Mikey still stood there shaking. When he still wouldn't move, the man pulled out his ever-present strap, whipping it hard across the back of Mikey's legs above where the tops of the braces sat.

Mikey sucked in a breath at the sudden pain but he'd grown up with randori as punishment whenever he misbehaved and this was nothing compared to that. Still, where Master Splinter always stopped with one hit in a place it would never do any serious damage, he knew he couldn't count on that with this psycho, so swallowing his pride, he stood straighter on all fours, wincing as his engorged penis fell completely free of its confines and mortified, followed the man to the training grounds where his session attracted a larger jeering crowd than usual.

-:-

[Just why is the subject sporting an erection?] Mai demanded of Bradford five long, torturous days later.

[Viagra,] Dogpound replied, amusement darkening his voice.

Mikey shuddered in misery. Every day. Every damn day, Bradford had force-fed the drug to him in his food and every day he'd been paraded around in front of the rank and file or forced to train in an engorged state and there'd been no relief. Even while watching the other dogs training, he'd been instructed to stand straight and shocked or painfully grabbed and twisted if he tried to hide it or sit down.

The first day, the drug had worn off by midday so the next, Dogpound simply upped the dose and it had lasted well into the evening, leaving Mikey unable to rest or sleep or even pee until his erection at long last receded. The first time he'd woken with morning wood upon hitting puberty, he remembered panicking and running to Donnie in distress when he couldn't go and Donnie had explained how it was a common problem for human males. There were solutions for humans to deal with it, his brother had discovered upon research, but it was harder for them as their plastrons were in the way, preventing them from pressing against and putting pressure on their bladders. Now, however, things were far worse than back then as the erection lasted far too long and he couldn't do a thing about it. As a result, Mikey had often shivered and shuddered with need for hours and since then had made sure to go immediately after breakfast, knowing what was to come throughout the day.

The worst thing though, he discovered to his perpetual horror and shame, was the late-night visits that started from curious onlookers who wanted to take advantage of his state and helplessness. He shuddered again in misery, shoving the thought from his mind as harshly as he could.

Mai whirled around and stormed to her drug cabinet, pulling the door open a little too hard to inspect its contents. [You raided my supply?]

[Don't you think the mongrel looks more the part by swinging in the breeze like any other male dog?] Bradford laughed raucously.

Mai actually growled as she all but charged over to the tall dog mutant, jamming her finger in his bare, hairy chest. [How dare you help yourself to the drugs in my surgery! Didn't you learn anything after Hakuba gave Spot that painkiller? You do not give it anything without my express approval first! _Anything!_ ]

[What's the big deal? It's not like a little bit of Viagra is dangerous!]

[It does have its side-effects and this isn't normal, fully-tested Viagra. This is something based on it but designed specifically for Spot's biochemistry. I cannot be sure of the effects of long term use,] the vet explained angrily and Mikey shuddered again at the possible ramifications. [That's not even taking into consideration the fact I needed the subject to be drug-free for what I had planned for today's session! You've ruined my plans, Chris!]

Mikey's eyes flickered to try to see Dogpound from where he laid, tightly strapped to the table but the dog mutant was out of his visual range.

[What were you going to do?] Dogpound asked seconds later, sounding ever-so-slightly chagrined at being chastised so.

[R&D have a new psychotropic drug that is about ready for human testing and they asked me to test it first. Spot should be the perfect candidate considering he thinks like a human and shares some of their DNA.]

Mikey wilted in relief at having dodged a bullet. He never thought he'd have actually been grateful to be drugged up by Dogpound like this.

[Good thing the subject's already lined up for another session with me," Mai groused in annoyance. "Unfortunately though, it means I will have to delay my plans for a few days and do something else today. Something I hadn't prepared for.]

The chill raced through Mikey anew and he wriggled frantically on the table, hoping to somehow find a way to break free of the straps securing him tightly to it.

[Someone cover up the subject's erection. It's distracting!] Mai demanded, from wherever she was over his shoulder.

One ninja moved quickly away, while the other moved closer, his build reminding Mikey of the creepy Three-Five-Eight and he whimpered silently.

[That looks painful,] the ninja purred silkily, reaching out to touch him. [Would you like me to do something about it?]

'Get off of me!' Mikey begged desperately, trying to wriggle away once more. Unfortunately, his erection wobbling in place only seemed to encourage the sick bastard.

[You know you aren't to talk to it!] Mai snapped, turning on and taking her anger out on her assistant. [After we are done here today, you will report to your team leader for disciplinary action!]

[Hai, Mai-sama,] the ninja replied, snapping to attention as the other ninja returned with a towel which he quickly draped across the lower part of Mikey's body.

[You know, it would be extremely cruel to just leave Spot in that state unaided,] Dogpound chuckled thoughtfully. [I say go ahead and help him.]

'No! Don't encourage the creep, Dogpound!' Mikey screamed internally as the Foot Soldier stepped forward once more, lifting the towel and sliding his hand underneath to come into contact with him. He shuddered in terror at the unwelcome touch, tears prickling the corners of his eyes.

[Since when do you care about helping Spot?] Mai asked flatly in disbelief, staring at Bradford.

"Oh but Spot wants it so bad. Look at his face, begging for relief," Bradford mocked with a sneer. Then ignoring the look on Mai's face, instead asked, [Will the drug you plan to test on Spot cause him harm?]

[No. In fact, if it works as promised, it should even help Spot to adjust to his new life better,] she replied and struggling to focus over the paedo's ministrations, Mikey strained to hear what she planned to do to him but it was so hard to concentrate as the ninja worked him. He gasped for breath, his sight and mind swimming and reeling in the combination of relief and humiliation, pleasure and self-hatred that threatened to overwhelm and swallow him whole.

[What do you mean?] Bradford frowned.

[While the drug does not control minds, it is designed to numb the mind, making the subject more pliable, susceptible to suggestion,” Mai explained. “With repeated use, you could probably convince Spot to both think and act like an actual, a real dog in a matter of days instead of months or more.]

[Forget it! I don't want you using that on him!] Bradford snapped adamantly.

[Really? I thought you'd be all for it,] Mai exclaimed in surprise.

[I want to break the damn mongrel piece by piece not let him take the easy route. Where would the satisfaction be in that?] Bradford growled angrily. [Besides, he _owes_ me for everything he's done to me!]

[I see your point,] Mai replied drily.

Mikey sobbed in disgust, his vision blanking out as relief suddenly filled him and he felt a familiar hot and sticky mess splash all over him.

[I forbid you to use such a drug on Spot,] Bradford commanded, continuing their conversation regardless of Mikey's inability to pay full attention.

[Well, unfortunately, Chris, you don't have a say in whether I test it or not. R&D is relying on me and I will be testing it on him in a few days time,] Mai retorted obstinately. Then she softened in deference, [However, I will only test the minimal amount necessary and won't use it to force him to behave like a real dog. Since you don't want that, though, if you have any ideas for what you want to be suggested to Spot for the testing, feel free to submit them to me before the day. They need to be things that will bring about a noticeable change in behaviour so we can observe the results. Now, I need you to leave so I can get on with my work.]

Then Mikey was aware of hands on him again and he tried to flinch away even as more straps were pulled across him, arms, legs and torso, tightening so much he could barely move even a millimetre. He snapped his eyes open in panic, staring wildly up at Mai who leant over him as her hands lifted his head gently to slide something in around it. He blinked at her, begging her to stop, begging her to tell him what she was doing but as per orders given several days ago by Hakuba, she refused to acknowledge him, instead tightening the helmet-like thing around him and covering his head completely with the exception of his face. White noise immediately filled his hearing, drowning out anything from outside of the helmet and he began to panic even harder.

"Let me out!" he tried to scream but he was unable to open his mouth properly due to the solid piece of plastic clipped tightly under his jaw to the helmet, holding it close to the rest of his head, not that he had a voice any longer anyway, but it didn't stop him from trying repeatedly.

A hand patted his arm reassuringly and his gaze swivelled in place to catch sight of the sicko's hand on him again and freaking, he tried to buck free once more.

Above him, Mai mouthed something soundlessly and the hand immediately withdrew.

Suddenly, the woman's hand came far too close to his right eye for comfort and he tried uselessly to shy away. She pulled back his upper eyelid, clamping it painfully away before doing the same to the lower eyelid. Then, unable to block his vision, he saw something metal, long, slim and slightly curved yet blunt coming at him again, past his eyelids and digging under his eyeball.

-:-

Mikey hiccuped fitfully as two sets of hands lifted his shaky body off the table and back onto the floor. He wobbled unsteadily in place before falling over, unable to support himself as the memory of that psychopathic vet removing his eyeball from his skull to examine it replayed through his mind. She eventually replaced it before taping his eyelids closed and covering them with a bandage. At which point, she'd put some eyedrops into his other eye to dilate the pupil before running some tests on that as well and similarly eventually bandaged that eye over too. Afterwards, she'd taken scale, skin and shell samples and done a few other things he had no idea of since he couldn't see nor hear, only feel. Now that it was over, he still couldn't see but with the helmet off, at last, he could at least hear again. Could hear three Foot surrounding him, one set of light feet moving away before coming back and kneeling in front of him.

[Hold the subject upright and steady,] Mai commanded softly.

Two sets of hands grabbed at him, pulling him back onto his hands, no... paws and knees and held him steadily in place as he felt Mai's soft hands around his neck. He tried desperately to pull away.

[Keep still, Spot,] Mai commanded firmly.

“No, let me go! Don't touch me again!” Mikey cried hysterically, mouth moving soundlessly other than the sound of his ragged breath escaping through it. He could sense her displeasure but he didn't care. He was just done by it all.

Someone grabbed the D-ring on the back of his permanent collar and pulled on it, causing him to gasp and choke as the rough edge dug into his neck, squeezing into his windpipe. Trembling, Mikey immediately obeyed her command of keeping still and he felt something pull around his neck and tighten enough so it was not loose. He shook his head, feeling something smooth and cool hit the sides of his face and wished he could see what it was. Then the lead was reattached to his collar and he was left alone to slump miserably onto the familiar dog bed near the corner, the strange object a barrier between his chin and arm when he laid his head upon it wearily.

Suddenly, the surgery door opened and familiar, taunting laughter filled the air. [Nice! So what's the cone for?] Bradford asked in amusement.

[So Spot doesn't try to scratch his bandages off, of course,] Mai answered curtly.

Mikey lifted his head and glared as best he could in the direction her voice came from; a hard thing to do when your eyes were covered and wrapped in bandages. 'You could just tell me not to take them off! I'm not stupid!' he spat mentally as he clenched his aching fingers as much as he could within their metal prisons. 'Not that I could or would anyway! Not after what _you_ just did!'

Bradford laughed again. [So I can take Spot home now?]

[On three conditions,] Mai replied tiredly.

Mikey pulled in on himself. He didn't want to go anywhere with Dogpound again. Then again, he didn't want to stay in here near her any longer either. There were no good options. Not that he had a choice about any of them anyway.

He just wanted to go home and be free from all of this... but that wasn't ever going to happen now.

[What?] Bradford grunted.

[No more Viagra or any other medications without consulting me first. Ever!]

[Fine...] Dogpound groaned in dismay. [Next?]

[Neither you nor Hakuba is to remove Spot from his kennel until after my next session with him.]

Mikey would have blinked in confusion if his eyelids hadn't been taped closed and bandaged over.

Dogpound grumbled.

[His bandages need to stay on to give his eyes time to recover from today and he needs to be kept quiet and calm while doing so.]

[Fine! Hakuba won't be happy though. He says the training needs constant reinforcing, especially at these early stages of it considering how stupid the mongrel is.]

[Too bad!] Mai retorted snippishly. [I have to look after my patient's best interests and training and running around in the next few days are not those.]

[What's the third condition?] Dogpound asked wearily a moment later.

[Give him a damn bath! He stinks and it looks like he's beginning to get shell rot!] Mai snapped angrily. [When was the last time you bathed him?]

[I haven't,] Dogpound growled and Mikey cowered at the menacing sound. [That's something you'll have to take up with Hakuba.]

There was silence for a moment and then, [Hakuba doesn't have time to bath _your_ dog!] Mai exclaimed in astonishment. [He has other animals to train and he's been neglecting them to work so heavily with Spot!]

'Oh, in that case, tell him not to bother with me at all, then!' Mikey thought desperately. 'I really don't mind being the one that's neglected!'

[You really expect me to _bath_ this disgusting mongrel?] Bradford asked, the astonishment clear in his voice.

[Of course! As you've already stated, repeatedly, he's in _your_ care. If you don't want to do it, then arrange for a lackey to do it but make sure it gets done. Regularly! He's covered in filth and it is going to make him sick!]

'Not my fault!' Mikey protested desperately to himself. 'They're the ones who keep dragging me through it. He's the one who had my hands sealed in these giant metal paws! And he's the one who keeps feeding me that stuff and then...' he swallowed, not wanting to complete the debilitating thought. At least he'd be safe from that happening again after this dose finally wore off thanks to that woman banning further doses.

Oh god, but he hoped... He wouldn't put it past Dogpound to do it anyway if the mood hit him.

Suddenly, he felt the collar tug slightly as the lead shifted and he tried to look around wildly, wishing he knew where that monster was in relation to him.

[Heel, Spot!] Bradford growled and Mikey baulked in panic.

He couldn't see him! Couldn't see anything so how was he supposed to know where to walk?

The lead was suddenly pulled up short and Mikey stumbled to his paws and knees in a frantic effort to avoid being choked again.

[Just carry him back to the kennel, Chris,] Mai chastised. [You're more than strong enough.]

Bradford sighed in disgust and picked Mikey up, who struggled desperately in the giant mutant's grasp. [Keep still, mongrel. I don't want that disgusting boner of yours touching me.]

'You think I want it either?' Mikey huffed in distress as the monster left the surgery and stormed through the building. Once they were outside, Mikey felt himself fall as Bradford finally dropped him. He crashed to the ground, unable to support himself as twin jolts of agony ripped through his hands and up his arms and he gasped for breath as he laid there, trying to ride out the pain.

"Get up!" Bradford snarled. "You can either walk back or be dragged back! Stupid mutt!"

Shakily, Mikey pushed himself back up again and feeling the lead pulled in short, kept close to Dogpound as he struggled to keep up, stumbling multiple times as the monster went too fast over terrain he just couldn't see.

Finally, he heard a door open and he was led inside of his kennel. As usual, like the last few days, it was far too warm inside, having held the heat of the day but at least he was out of sight of prying eyes. Trembling in fear, he waited for Dogpound to remove the lead.

"Get to your bed and stay there!" Bradford snapped as soon as Mikey was released and cringing, Mikey turned and tried to feel his way toward the mat - a difficult, though not impossible task given the metal encasing his hands - crying out silently as he accidentally walked into a wall instead with the edge of the cone surrounding his head, pushing it painfully back into his throat and making him stumble.

Burning in embarrassment at the sound of his tormentor's laughter, Mikey shifted around, touching his right shoulder against the wall and carefully feeling his way along it. He soon came to a corner, the cone hit the wall again though this time not as hard, and he turned to follow it. Finally, he came across the saloon doors and used them as a guide for here to turn to find the middle of the room where his mat was. Then, when fully on it, he let himself collapse tiredly upon it, curling into himself and grateful when the laughing monster left, locking the door behind him.

He would have much rather left the hot kennel and gone outside into the shade or even taken the chance to have a drink but he was too afraid to move. Before moving onto being trained to respond to clicked commands, Hakuba had trained him to go to a specific spot, like his bed for example and stay there until given permission to move. If he moved before given it, he was punished with a beating or the shock collar and right now, he couldn't take that. He really couldn't take anything more. Especially since he knew there was a camera in here allowing them to watch him at all times. More than once, as soon as he stepped off the mat when commanded to stay, the collar had been remotely activated, shocking him long after he'd already collapsed.

'Leo...' he called silently, plaintively, 'Donnie... Raph... Daddy...'

He curled in on himself tighter. All he wanted was to see them again so badly but it was far too late. They hadn't come for him and he'd been whisked away out of New York and halfway across the planet. Even if they had a way to know where he was being kept, they had no way to get here and no way to leave America. If he wanted out of this place, he was going to have to find a way on his own but he was so tired. Everything had been taken from him piece by piece. His freedom, his legs, hands, voice and now his sight and if Mai tested that drug on him like she wanted to, he might not even have his mind or free will for much longer.

And even if he didn't lose it due to drugs - Mikey began to tremble harder as he tried to stifle the tears - he'd lose it anyway thanks to how everyone treated him like a mindless animal incapable of even understanding human language...

-:-

Mikey didn't know how long he dozed fitfully for, between the ache in his groin, the heat and the desperate need to empty his bladder, but the sound of the bolt sliding on the other side of the door to his kennel caught his attention, making him sit up quickly in fear for whoever came for him.

He wrinkled his beak as they silently entered, trying to catch the scent of the person. There was no smell of wet dog so it wasn't Bradford at least, he decided, not sure if he should be relieved or not, then again, Hakuba may not have been much better either. That human was the reason things had become so much worse for him, though at least unlike Dogpound, he wasn't as cruel for no reason.

[Heel, Spot,] a voice called, sending a shiver of terror down Mikey's spine and his breath hitched painfully in his chest.

It was worse than either of them! Three-Five-Eight!

[I said, heel!] the man repeated, his tone hardening dangerously in warning.

Shaking with fear and not a little anger over how this pedo had been treating him, Mikey reluctantly made his way slowly over, stepping carefully, unsure where the walls were or even the ninja himself.

[Good boy, Spot!] Three laughed softly, his tone easing with Mikey's obedience. [Would you like a bath?] he asked, slapping his thighs and acting excited as if speaking to a small puppy.

Mikey shuddered again. He did! He needed one so badly to get the crust, mud and other gunk off of him but he didn't want it at the hands of this monster.

[Aww, you don't like baths?] Three cooed sweetly. [A lot of doggies don't but some love them! Just give it a chance, I'm sure you'll learn to love them too and I'm going to be bathing you every week from now on. We'll have such fun together!]

Mikey hung his head, disheartened. Dogpound... this was just another way for the former martial arts idol to torment him, knowing full well how he felt about Three-Five-Eight touching him.

He felt the lead clipped back onto his collar and was led out through the saloon doors and into his run. The ninja at least was gentle with him, leading the way carefully down the ramp and across the scratchy grass. Mikey gratefully breathed in the fresh, cooler air in relief and tried to ignore the fact that he knew who had control of him. Finally, standing in the dappled light of the late afternoon sun, they stopped at the other end of his run. Mikey heard the lead clipped to the fence of the enclosure, preventing him from trying to get away and the next thing he knew, the man walked away. All too soon though, he came back with what Mikey guessed was a bucket, full of sloshing, soapy water by the sound of it.

The ninja removed his leg braces, putting them aside and Mikey relished in the partial freedom, taking the chance to stretch his legs out slowly, one at a time. It was too bad he couldn't have stood but the massive weights on his hands did their job well by preventing that. That and he didn't want to be shocked for even trying, especially with soapy water being dribbled over him before being vigorously scrubbed down.

[Do you like that, boy? Huh? Do you like that?] the faceless ninja asked and Mikey drew in on himself slightly, baring his teeth as the only way he could answer. The man laughed, knowing Mikey was no threat right now and moved around him to work on the other side of his body.

Suddenly, Mikey stiffened as Three-Five-Eight's hand shifted underneath him to wrap around his unrelenting erection. Desperately, he tried to pull away but the grip tightened, squeezing and hurting him.

[Shh, shh! It's okay. That magnificent organ needs to be washed too, Spot,] the ninja cooed soothingly.

'Not by you!' Mikey cried desperately to himself. 'I'll do it myself!' Then he froze. He couldn't do it himself... he had no hands any more. He was completely at this weirdo's mercy and it was all he could do not to sob at the realisation.

Before too much longer, it was finally over and a towel draped over him. [You know, Spot, you're lucky you don't have fur,] The ninja laughed as he dried Mikey vigorously before leading him back inside and to his water bowl where Mikey gratefully drank from, even with the difficulties of dealing with the cone on his head and being unable to see.

As he drank, the ninja left his kennel and relieved, Mikey relaxed and continued drinking. Finally, satisfied, Mikey began blindly working his way back to the doors, intending to go back out into the sun or perhaps the shade of one of the trees that overhung his run when he heard the bolt slide. He whipped his head around towards the sound.

[You feel better, now, Spot? Huh? All nice and clean?]

Mikey lowered himself to the ground, not wanting to deal with this guy again so soon and tried searching again for the saloon doors to get out.

[You've been such a good boy, Spot. I've got a nice, juicy boner for you!]

Oh no! No way in hell! Mikey shook his head vigorously as he frantically backed up, only to find the door wouldn't budge. Wondering why, he whipped his head blindly around again, when he suddenly remembered those doors had a bolt up the top too and that it must have been that bolt that he'd heard close, not the one on the outside of the main kennel door like he'd originally thought. His blood ran cold as he heard the sound of clothing being shed and tossed aside.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to let know what you think; concrit, thoughts and comments are always welcomed :-)


	10. Chapter 10 - Pt 2 - Spot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also, see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.
> 
> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fandom Announcement! - 13 Days of Halloween is on again this year! Writers and Artists are welcome. For more information, look for sampsonknight on Deviant Art or https://tmnt-allstories.tumblr.com/
> 
> A/N: Just to give you a head's up, the next chapters of this story and 'SnO' will probably be delayed by a week each as I'll likely be posting the next chapter of 'AOtGO' next week instead, cutting into my regular update cycle.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 10

Spot lifted his head, alert as something unusual caught his attention. There was a disturbance in the trees where there never was, a series of muffled thuds and strange, yet somehow familiar scents blowing his way in the cool night air. Though his ever-present fear played havoc with his mind and body as always, his curiosity piqued so he pushed himself onto all fours and stalked quietly along the fence of his run, hoping to catch sight of whatever or whoever dared to intrude into his home grounds, praying whatever it was wouldn't notice him and try to hurt him the way his masters and Alpha always did.

His eyes narrowed as four large, strangely shaped shadows dashed quickly and silently across the grass from the surrounding woods, heading directly for the mansion. He'd long since learnt that anyone who went there was bad news so, with a faint growl on the edge of his breath, he warily watched their progress, following them from one side of his run to the other as they raced ever closer to the foreboding, shadowy building, only stopping long enough to knock out a pair of his keepers who were patrolling the area.

Moments later, he lost their scent as they moved upwind from him and that was when the largest of the shadows stopped moving and tall ears twitching, turned to peer in his direction. With but a softly hissed command that Spot couldn't quite hear, the other three shadows stopped running and also turned to face him before racing towards him with barely contained excitement.

A part of him, the part that was so often beaten into submission by his Alpha warned him to cower, to turn and run back into his kennel for dubious safety but the other more curious, stupid side that so often got him into trouble bade him to stay and though he backed away from the fence, he gave into it.

"Mikey?" the stranger wrapped in blue asked almost breathlessly, his eyes fixed unerringly on Spot.

The tall one in purple practically skidded to a halt, crouching down and clutching the wire of his enclosure desperately. "Darwin's beard! I-I don't believe it! We-we finally found you!" he babbled quickly in excitement mixed with... concern? But that couldn't be right. No one was ever concerned about him. Just angry, cruel and mocking. “Are you alright?” Spot stared at him uneasily, head canted in confusion before his attention was drawn to the tall furry creature as he spoke, an unfamiliar emotion soaking his voice that made Spot desperate to approach and seek comfort despite the fact no one could be trusted to give such things.

"My son! We feared we might never see you again. Thank goodness you are still alive." For a moment his eyes closed and when they opened again, Spot noticed an unusual brightness to them, as if they were wet.

"What the hell have they done to you, little brother?" the fourth asked testily as he crouched and reached out a trembling hand. Spot hunkered down before backing away further in fright as an angry light filled the stranger's bright green eyes. "I'm going to fucking kill those arseholes for what they've done to you, Mikey!" he spat furiously.

"Calm down, Raphael," the furry creature soothed, reaching out a calming hand and resting it on the other's shoulder, "you are frightening your brother."

Raphael whipped his head around to stare up in disbelief. "I'm frightening him? How?"

"I do not know, my son but perhaps it is due to your current aggravated state."

His terror quickly rising, Spot stared from one to the other from where he lay pressed close to the ground and well out of reach of probing and often violent hands. As long as none of them tried to go to the other side of his enclosure and surround him like his masters often did, he would be safe.

Suddenly, one of the strangers reached back, drawing a shining sword and Spot's eyes widened, glued to the sight, mesmerised. He hadn't had a good experience with people with weapons before now but something about this one rang of safety and... protection. Against his better judgement, Spot slowly rose and took a careful step closer, his eyes focused intently on the sword in that forest green hand.

The red-eyed stranger, his hands still gripping the wire of his run, followed Spot's gaze, "Leo?" he hissed, "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to cut this fence open so we can get Mikey out and leave," Leo replied firmly and quietly.

"You can't!" came the immediate panicked reaction.

"Why not, Donnie?" Leo asked, lowering his weapon a little as he gazed down at Donnie questioningly.

He pointed up at a box protruding from the wire. "Because the fence has an alarm built into it. If you cut it open, the alarm will sound and Foot will come swarming out here like a horde of cockroaches with their shelter uncovered," Donnie explained agitatedly, looking up and down the run as if searching. "We need to find another way in."

"How about that?" Raphael asked, motioning to Spot's kennel.

“Yes, let's try it,” Donnie agreed, releasing his grip on the wire to stand. He then rushed towards the kennel at the end of the run with Raphael following.

Spot glanced after them but otherwise ignored them in favour of Leo and his shiny sword. He came right up to the fence as Leo poked his fingers through the gaps in the wire, pressing his fingers against Spot's face and Spot relished the warm, gentle touch, something he hadn't felt since... since... He couldn't remember the last time someone was so gentle with him and he frowned. No one had ever been gentle or kind to him before now so why, how, could this seem so familiar?

"It's alright, Mikey," Leo said softly, confidently. "We're getting you out of here tonight and we're taking you home."

Spot cocked his head in confusion at the strange words. He felt as though he should know what they meant but... suddenly, the sound of his kennel doors swinging open reached his hearing and he shuddered. He whipped his head around to see Donnie and Raphael pelting down the ramp towards him and he panicked, racing to the end of his run but there was nowhere to go. He was trapped! He was always trapped and he didn't know why he even bothered to try to get away anymore, especially since he was always punished for trying.

Baring his teeth in warning, Spot growled lightly with his breath. It wasn't as mighty or fierce as the growls the other dogs or his Alpha had but still, it's enough to let anyone who came too close how he felt about it. They all always ignored or laughed at him for it but what other choice did he have? He had no voice, no other way to tell them to leave him alone anymore. To his surprise, these two actually hesitated at his warning but still, they kept coming. Straight for him. Tears he refused to let free prickled at the corners of his eyes as he lowered himself to his stomach, immediately submitting to their power over him so they wouldn't hurt him so much for speaking his mind.

"Hey, it's alright, Mikey," Donnie exclaimed softly in alarm, "we're here to help you, not hurt you."

Lying! He was lying! Spot gasped. No one ever helped him, they only ever hurt him and there was nothing he could do to stop them or it just became that much worse. He quivered in terror as Donnie came too close, reaching out to touch him.

"What the hell's wrong with him?" Raphael demanded angrily, making Spot panic all the more.

"I-I'm not sure, Raph," Donnie replied quietly. "It's almost like he doesn't recognise us," he theorised, his gaze flickering around the run sadly before settling on Spot once more.

"I promise you, Mikey, it's going to be okay. Let us help you," Donnie pleaded gently.

Spot closed his eyes, lowering his head - he didn't want to see the blow coming; it was always far worse when he saw it coming. And why did they keep saying that strange word? Mikey. Why did it feel like he should know it? Why did it feel like he should know them when he only knew his Alpha, his Master, Mai and his faceless tormentors?

At that moment he felt hands on his legs, releasing his braces and he gasped in panic.

But he hadn't done anything wrong! He hadn't done anything wrong and it was only a couple of days since his last bath; he wasn't due for another for nearly a week! He wailed desperately to himself, scrabbling away in terror. He needed them to walk properly and the only times they were removed were when he was bad and taken to Mai for punishment or for bathtime and that was a whole other nightmare!

"Calm down, Mikey!" Raph snapped irritably. "You're making it really hard for Donnie to get you free, bro!"

"Mikey," that calm soothing voice commanded from the other side of the fence. Spot couldn't help but look up and meet Leo's sharp yet kind, patient gaze. "Keep still and let Donnie work. He won't hurt you, I promise."

Though he couldn't fully understand the words, the tone soothed him and Spot's eyes flickered back to Donnie warily, watching as he pulled away first one and then the other brace and waited for the punishment to come. Nothing happened except for Donnie shifting to carefully examine his neck. Moments later, his deft hands were at work and Spot felt the ever-present shock collar come free and he wriggled his neck in delight. That horrible thing never came off and it felt so good feeling the cool, night air touching his bare skin. He shivered in delight at the feeling, marvelling at the fact that there was no longer a faint, dangerous hum against his neck.

"Aren't you going to remove the other one too?" Raph asked when Donnie shifted away to study Spot's paws.

"Can't," Donnie replied in an empty tone. "The lock's been filled in to make it unpickable. It'll have to wait..." Then he sighed in frustration and Spot could smell the anger rising off the strange person in front of him. He backed away again, his own fear rising rapidly once more.

"What's wrong, Donnie?" Leo called softly as Donnie began to shake in fury.

"Those bastards welded those manacles to Mikey's hands!" he spat furiously. " _Welded them!_ "

Raph's expression darkened. "So you can't remove those either?" he asked in barely suppressed rage.

"Not without specialised cutting equipment, no," Donnie replied angrily. Then his expression softened as he noticed Spot's fear of him and reached out a gentle hand, only to pull it back miserably when he saw Spot quail all the more. "I'm so sorry, that must have hurt you so much when they put those on,” he murmured sympathetically.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that welding is done by using extreme temperatures to melt and join the metal and that metal itself conducts the heat. Mikey's hands... They must have been badly burned in the process." Donnie sighed sadly again. "Don't worry, Mikey, I'll find a way to get them off of you as painlessly as possible I just... It'll probably have to wait until we can get you home. I'm so sorry, buddy."

"But that'll take nearly a month!" Raph protested loudly in disbelief. He quietened again at a hissed warning from Leo. "You have to do it before then, Donnie!"

"With what equipment, Raph?" Donnie retorted emotionally. "They might have what I'd need here if here is where those were... attached... to him but..."

"But we can't take the risk of staying and searching to find out," Leo spoke up firmly. "I assume those manacles will make it too heavy for Mikey to walk properly?"

Donnie nodded sadly. "That and I don't think he's walked in all the time he's been here. It's hard to see for certain in this lighting, but he has obvious tan marks and callouses from those braces suggesting they've been on him a long time, if not the entire time. We'll have to help him. Or rather, you and Raph will have to help him," he explained.

Raph looked at Donnie incredulously. "I've got no problem with helping him but wouldn't it better to have Leo or me being free to fight if need be? No offence but you really aren't as good a fighter as us."

"I'm too tall. You and Leo are similar in height and far closer to Mikey's," Donnie explained, bristling at hearing the stark truth which he knew all too well.

"Donatello is correct," the tall furry stranger spoke up, calming Raphael and Donnie both. “The two of you must be the ones to help Michelangelo walk.”

"Come on, I'll help until we get out of this...” Donnie choked a moment, “cage... and then Leo can take over."

Suddenly, the two came at Spot and grabbed his forelegs, draping them over their shoulders and pulling him upright. Spot gasped as his back legs took the brunt of his weight in an unfamiliar position and he tried to fight back, cringing in fear when Raph looked at him and told him to “Stop fighting us!"

It was a command and he had to obey those unless he wanted to be punished. Head hanging in resignation, he stopped fighting and simply let them do as they wanted.

Finally, with Spot's back paws mostly dragging on the ground, they made it into the kennel and headed for the door. Spot looked over to where his lead and muzzle hung on the wall, wondering why they weren't stopping to put those on. He never left the confines of his run without them but Donnie followed his gaze and murmured darkly, "Never again, Mikey."

Raph gave Donnie a curious look but didn't say anything, instead opting to reach out and push the door open where the other two met them. As soon as they were outside, Spot looking around everywhere in curiosity at how everything appeared so different not only in the dead of night but also at his current height, Leo stepped in, taking Spot's arm from Donnie and slinging it around his neck instead.

Leo smiled gently at Spot, "It's okay, little brother, you're safe now. We're going home."

-:-

His bones ached, his muscles cramped and his legs felt unusually tight. Spot felt ready to drop from exhaustion. The sun was just beginning to rise through the trees surrounding them and they'd been running all night, with him held upright on his hind legs by Leo and Raph the entire time. His back paws hurt terribly from being dragged along the ground behind them so he'd tried moving them the way his masters and Alpha always did, the way Donnie and Master Splinter in front of him did but they were cramping up and hurt so much from the unfamiliar movement. On top of all that, other than short naps before and after dinner, he hadn't slept and being almost breakfast time, he was beginning to feel really hungry again as well as tired.

Thinking of breakfast time, Spot stared back over his shoulder anxiously. His Alpha would be coming to feed him at any moment and would find he wasn't where he was supposed to be. He began to quiver in fear; he'd be punished so badly when his Alpha caught up with him and he would. His Alpha always knew exactly where he was. Spot's gasping breathing quickened and he began fidgeting frantically. He had to get back! Now! These people may have been strange but they were also kind, almost never raising their voices at him and he didn't want them to be hurt for taking him away from where he belonged. He had to leave them now and get back before his Alpha caught up to them and killed or hurt them too.

"What's wrong, Mikey?" Raph grunted in his ear. Having no idea what he meant, Spot ignored him and just began trying to break free.

"He's probably tired," Leo replied, actually sounding tired himself. "We've been running all night. Maybe we should stop for a few minutes to rest and catch our breath."

Splinter looked around worriedly. "I am not so sure that is a good idea, my son. We are still far too close to Foot territory."

"At least let us stop long enough for me to bandage Mikey's feet," Donnie suggested worriedly, looking down at Spot's scratched and scraped back paws.

Squeezing his eyes closed, Spot whimpered silently to himself. Scraping along the ground like they constantly did since they began running hurt badly but it was nothing he couldn't handle. Unlike what would happen if he didn't get back now.

The small group finally came to a stop. Leo and Raph gently lowered Spot to the ground and sitting down themselves, they rolled their shoulders, stretching. Spot took a moment to shake himself, to get feeling back into his front and back legs before turning around to trot back the way they'd come.

"Uh... Mikey? Where are you going?" Donnie called in disbelief but Spot kept moving, picking up the pace. He didn't know how long it would take to get back and he was terrified he'd be too late but he had to try. For his sake and theirs!

Suddenly, someone caught him by the shell on his back, holding him in place. "Damn but he can really move with those heavy manacles!" Raph snorted as Spot fought desperately to pull free.

Nonononono! They couldn't stop him! He had to get back before he was punished again! His Alpha would be coming for him by now and he'd be so angry at him that he'd probably get sent straight to Mai again! He didn't want to go to Mai again! She always hurt him in ways his Alpha couldn't even begin to dream of and he could dream up plenty of ways, each more twisted and painful than the last.

"Mikey! Stop!"

The command was familiar in any language and Spot couldn't help but stop, quivering in terror where he stood. He looked up fearfully at Leo who then looked at him more gently.

"Tell us what's wrong," he commanded softly.

Spot stared at him for a moment, then looked back in the direction they'd come from before lowering his head and staring helplessly at the ground.

"I believe your brother fears the Foot coming after him," Splinter offered tightly, his ears pressing back unhappily on his head.

"So why the hell would he want to go back?" Raph exploded in disbelief. "And why the hell won't he talk to us?"

"I-I don't think he can," Donnie replied tightly after a moment.

"And what the fuck does that mean!" Raph demanded furiously, earning a chastising look from Splinter and making Spot whimper silently as he cowered to the ground again in terror.

"I mean, he's obviously been trained not to speak in the time they had him. That collar I removed... it was a shock collar," Donnie explained, clenching one hand tightly onto his opposite arm. "Mikey was probably shocked every time he tried to speak and now it's ingrained in him not to."

"Those monsters!" Raph spat, shaking angrily as he held tightly onto Spot, preventing him from escaping and running back to his masters.

"Wait, you said trained like you expected something like that,” Leo cut in sharply. “Donnie, what exactly aren't you telling us?"

Donnie sighed miserably and then met Leo's gaze. "Judging by his environment and the... accoutrements attached to him, I think... I believe... they were treating him as if he is a dog," he explained hesitantly. "I mean, look at the way he's been acting since we got him out. He was even expecting us to put a leash and muzzle on him before we left the kennel!"

"Why didn't you say something earlier?" Raph hissed angrily, glaring at Donnie.

"I wasn't certain! I hoped I was wrong..."

"You're almost never wrong when it comes to things like this," Leo pointed out softly.

"I know..." Donnie hung his head, "but there's always a first time for everything and I really hoped.... that this time I would be..."

"My poor son," Splinter murmured softly, coming over and laying a comforting hand on Spot's head. Flinching, Spot peeked up fearfully at him and Splinter's heart broke. "If only we were able to get to him before the ship left New York."

"But we weren't... it was an ambush..." Leo muttered in shame. "We weren't able to break past it in time and we were also almost caught by the authorities."

"Yeah, we know!" Raph snapped, glaring furiously at him. "We were all there, Leo! Remember?"

Leo shot Raph a look but before he could retort, Donnie stepped between them. "We don't have time for this. I need to treat Mikey's feet before those cuts end up worse or infected. Mikey, I need you to sit down and let me examine your feet."

But Spot ignored him, trying frantically to break free of Raph's hold again. He had to get back before his Alpha caught up and hurt him or them. He didn't know why but some instinct deep within him demanded of him to do everything he could to protect these people in any way he could.

"Raph," Donnie began but said no more as Raph shifted his grip to pick Spot up and deposit him on his rump, legs and paws extended out in front of him. Spot yelped silently at the unfamiliar and unstable position. In fact, he would have fallen over if it wasn't for Raph's death grip on his shell, holding him in place.

"It's okay, Mikey, we're just trying to help you," Donnie soothed as he carefully took the closest foot.

Distressed, Spot tried yanking his paw back out of reach but the strange person's grip, while gentle, was too firm.

"I'm going to stop it hurting quite so much," Donnie explained softly as he began cleansing it of the blood and dirt coating it. "The last thing you need right now is bacteria taking hold and infecting the cuts."

Spot stared wide-eyed at Donnie as he realised what he was trying to do and unused to anyone but Mai, or to a lesser extent his Master, treating his injuries, he couldn't believe it and it made him wonder if Donnie too, would turn around and start hurting him afterwards like they sooner or later always did.

Suddenly, he became aware of Leo shifting closer and wrapping a comforting arm around him. Spot stiffened a moment but then couldn't help but give in to his deepest instincts and lean into him, allowing Leo to calm him and relishing the rare comfort that somehow felt so familiar yet so alien to him. He finally settled down and watched Donnie gently work on his paws with drooping eyelids, enjoying the tender care, unlike anything he could ever remember feeling.

-:-

Suddenly awake, Spot shot to all fours as he stared intently into the brush. His eyes widened in fright and he quickly took a step forward.

"Mikey?" Leo called softly, coming to alert. "Where are you going?"

But Spot continued to walk shakily, one step, then another and another. His Alpha had come for him at last and he was in so much trouble. He could only hope that he could get to his Alpha before his Alpha noticed the others and tried to hurt them too.

"Mikey! Come back here!" Leo called again and vicious laughter filled the air, making Spot quiver in terror. There would be no escaping his Alpha's wrath this time. Not when he laughed like that.

"Haven't you noticed by now that Spot doesn't answer to that name any more?" his Alpha guffawed nastily as he appeared from behind a large tree. His hand snatched out and grabbed the D-ring of his collar with a vicious twist. Spot gasped in pain and his legs almost gave out beneath him.

"Dogpound!" Raph snarled angrily, whipping out his sais as he took a menacing step forward.

"Uh, uh, uh, uh! Unless you want your precious... dog..." his Alpha laughed again "to suffer more than necessary, I suggest you keep back."

Spot heard the leash snap into place on his collar and he immediately lowered himself to the ground in submission, too terrified to meet his Alpha's eyes.

[Foot ninja, kill them all!] Dogpound commanded, before whirling in place and dragging a startled, choking Spot after him.

It was several minutes beyond the last sounds of battle before Dogpound stopped and glared down at Spot. [How dare you go with those freaks, you mongrel!] he snapped furiously, kicking him viciously in the side.

But it wasn't his fault! He tried to stay, he tried to return earlier but they wouldn't let him! Spot turned pleading, desperate eyes up to his Alpha, begging him to listen, to understand but his Alpha never listened to him, not that he could even talk anymore anyway. To be honest, after so long, he wasn't even sure he could remember how to talk even if he still had the ability.

[You belong to the Foot, not them!] Dogpound roared. [When we get back, you will pay dearly for your behaviour and betrayal, Spot!]

Spot recoiled in terror. Please! He didn't want to see Mai again. Couldn't stand the idea of being handed over to Master Hakuba for gruelling corrective training again. His Alpha was bad enough on his own without also being punished by being handed over to them too!

Dogpound reached down with one hand, undoing the belt wrapped around his waist and gripped it, spikes facing down, then raised it into the air and...

"Get away from our brother!"

Dogpound laughed and brought the belt down hard across Spot's legs, making him cry out in silent agony, his breaths harsh and shallow in his sore, dry throat. "This mongrel isn't your 'brother' any more. He's just another mutt belonging to the Foot!" he crowed cruelly. [Spot, stay!]

Whimpering silently in a combination of pure terror and pain, Spot crouched down, watching fearfully as Dogpound rushed at Raph and Leo. There was a flurry of punches and kicks that he could barely follow, Leo and Raph striking out hard and fast with sharp weapons and Dogpound working to overwhelm them with his overpowering brute strength and size. Spot couldn't keep watching so he buried his face in his cold paws, gasping for breath in fear for what would happen to the nice people once his Alpha was done with them.

He wished they would just forget about him and run, flee for their lives but some deep forgotten part of him knew they never would. That they'd fight for him until the end and he really didn't want to see that. He couldn't, not again; he still had nightmares after the last time.

Suddenly, he felt warm, steady hands on his shoulders and though he was petrified, he risked peeking up into Donnie's kind, reddish gaze. "Come on, Mikey, we need to get you away from here."

Spot looked back over to where his Alpha was still fighting Raph, Leo and now Master Splinter and shook his head wildly in panic. He couldn't go! He was already in enough trouble as it was.

"Mikey," Donnie repeated sadly. "We'll protect you from him but we need to get you away from him first." Then his expression shifted, a look of understanding spreading across it, before hardening. [Spot, heel!] Donnie suddenly commanded and Spot stared fearfully up at him, his body automatically responding the way it had been conditioned to.

Donnie's face crumpled in pain but he took the lead gently and quickly led Spot away from the clearing.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, Mikey's family finally turned up for him. Better late than never, right? But don't worry, there's still plenty to be revealed about his time in captivity and it'll pop up as appropriate.
> 
> Don't forget to let me know what you think :-)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Well, I wasn't going to update any of my other stories until Halloween was over but *shrugs* here you go :-P

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 11

It was hours later before the others caught up to them and Donnie finally removed the leash in favour of Raph and Leo helping Spot to run on his hind legs again, not stopping until they came to a stream where Spot pleaded to stop to drink from.

"We're leaving a clear trail behind us," Leo pointed out worriedly, "we can't stop for long."

"Just a few minutes, Leo," Donnie promised, helping his brothers gently lower Spot to the ground.

Spot looked up at each of them, hesitant to just go help himself and Donnie sighed. "Go drink, Mikey." But Spot just stood there looking up at them desperately and Donnie reluctantly repeated in a commanding tone, [Go drink, Spot.]

Raph twitched as Spot sluggishly took a wobbling step to run and walk toward the stream. "What the hell was that, Donnie?"

"Japanese," Donnie replied drily. "I would think even you would be able to recognise that much, Raphael."

Raphael growled and Leo placed a calming hand on his brother which was immediately, violently, shrugged off. "I meant, calling him that name! Commanding him like he's just... just some dog!" he spat angrily. "What the actual fuck!"

Donnie hesitated, then wearily closed his eyes. "Didn't you see the way Dogpound spoke to him earlier? Mikey's been conditioned, trained to respond to the name 'Spot' and to commands in Japanese. Haven't you noticed his confusion whenever we've been speaking to him all this time? It's like he doesn't fully understand what we are even saying. Mikey probably hasn't heard English in a long time and who knows what they've done to drive it from him so it could take him some time to get used to it again in the face of his conditioning."

"That's no fucking excuse to talk to him like that!" Raphael yelled furiously. "He's our brother, not a fucking dog!"

"Raphael! Language!" Splinter snapped sharply, slamming his walking stick into the ground. Spot, already freaking out from the raised, angry voices behind him, couldn't help but jump and whirl around to watch the others warily in case they decided to come over and start hurting him just like his masters and Alpha so often would.

"But Master Splinter! Donnie..."

"Donatello has done what he had to do to help your brother," Splinter interjected, his eyes narrowing in displeasure. "Do not take the situation out on him. Save your anger for when we have another run-in with the Foot and make no mistake, we are sure to do so."

"Hai Sensei..." Raph muttered, clearly unhappy. Then his head shot up as he stared at Spot.

Spot, seeing the situation quickly calm and not liking being watched so closely, turned back to the stream, lapping up water from it quickly in case they changed their minds about letting him drink. However, he kept a careful ear on them, listening intently for them to turn on him too.

"But how do we fix this?" Raph asked plaintively, gesturing at their brother.

"One step at a time," Donnie replied softly, "but unfortunately, it's going to have to wait until we are safely out of range of the Foot. We don't have time to stop and deal with it now."

“There is one thing we can start with for now, however," Leo mused thoughtfully as he walked slowly over to Spot so as to not alarm him.

"Spot?" he called softly, planting a small smile on his face and trying to exude a calming presence.

Spot looked up at Leo from the stream, an anxious look in his baby blue eyes.

Leo's expression hardened as he realised Donnie was right, then he sighed. He wouldn't let this defeat them. [Your name is Mikey, not Spot,] he explained gently. [We're going to call you Mikey from now on and we want you to answer to that again. Like you used to.]

Spot began to tremble with desire. He liked the sound of that name so much more than his own. It was somehow familiar and had a warmth to it that made him desperate to claim it but his Alpha had spent so long drilling into him that his name was Spot and that he wasn't to respond to anything else but that or derogatory slurs that he wasn't sure he should or even could.

[It's okay to answer to Mikey, it's your real name, remember?] Leo reassured softly, still with that small but warm smile on his face

Spot stared at him quizzically, then blinked twice and hung his head. No, he didn't remember. After so many sessions with Mai, his thoughts were fuzzy and his memory filled with holes that always took too long to fill; so long that he eventually stopped bothering to try as it always hurt too much to regain only to have them ripped away again mere days or weeks later.

Leonardo regarded him in confusion, then [I'll tell you what, I'll make you a deal, little brother. We're going to call you Mikey from now on and you're going to respond to that but if Dogpound catches up to us again before we can get somewhere safe, we'll call you Spot in front of him so you don't get into more trouble. Is that okay?]

Spot lifted his head again, studying Leo carefully. Something about him made him want to trust him and make him happy, something he'd felt from the moment he'd laid eyes on him, so reluctantly, despite his almost paralysing fear, he blinked once, wagging his tail half-heartedly.

If nothing else, he'd try.  
  
For Leo.

-:-

The group continued travelling through the thick, overgrown woods for hours on end with no sign of pursuit and they eventually came across hard, rocky ground where it was far easier to hide their trail. After the sun went down, they left the rocks and moved back to the forest, working especially hard to hide signs of their passage in case any pursuit became lucky. After some time, they found a small stream where everyone drank eagerly from after Donnie determined it was safe. He hadn't been too thrilled with the idea of drinking without boiling it first but they couldn't risk lighting a fire and drawing attention they had fought so hard to lose. Still, Donnie had only let them drink a little before refilling their water bottles and mixing a little condies crystals into each to purify the water. Afterwards, they continued on for a couple more hours before settling down to rest, sure they were safe at last.

Spot, no, Mikey, he had to continually remind himself, crept close to Splinter. Since being rescued, he hadn't had much to do with the tall, furry stranger, given that he was mostly being half-carried by Leo and Raph the whole time but something about him drew him, making him want to, no, need to get close to him.

Splinter reached out to wrap a warm, cloth swathed arm around him, drawing him gently into his side and allowing Mikey to rest his tired head on his lap, all while rubbing soothingly at his shell. "My son, I feared greatly we would not find you alive again,” he murmured. “You have no idea how gratified I am to have my fears proven wrong."

Mikey closed his eyes, enjoying the repetitive, gentle touch as he listened to words he only half understood. The language was somehow familiar like he'd heard it a lot a long time ago and the more he heard it, the more he understood but it was still difficult and right now he was far too tired to concentrate on what Splinter was actually saying.

"I am so, so sorry it took us so long to get to you, my son. I hope that one day you can forgive us," Splinter continued softly as his other sons gathered close around them, each of them reaching out to touch Mikey as if they couldn't quite believe he was really with them again, safe at last.

Mikey opened his eyes, allowing his gaze to drift lazily from one to the next to the next, a small smile etching itself onto his lips at the concerned warmth exuding from each of them. Each of his... brothers, he'd heard them referred to as. Suddenly, he opened his eyes wide and pushed himself up to really study them for the first time since he'd seen them from inside his run.

Brothers? Could they actually be? He didn't really remember having brothers or what it meant anymore but somehow it felt right. Really, really right.

Mikey reached out his left forepaw to touch Donnie with it. Frustration at not being able to feel his warmth through the cold metal wrapped around the flesh he knew was inside welled up, overwhelming him. He drew it away again, lips peeled back in a resentful but silent snarl as he glared down at the offending appendage. A moment later, Donnie reached over to take it instead. Mikey lifted his gaze again, looking fearfully into his brother's reddish eyes as Donnie ran a hand along the paw and up until reaching his arm and Mikey shivered at the touch. Donnie immediately shifted closer.

"I promise I'll get these off you as soon as I can, Mikey, but it's likely that it'll have to wait until we get home," he explained slowly, giving Mikey time for the words to sink in. "Okay?"

Mikey just stared at him as he concentrated on what Donnie had said, then he blinked once in agreement while pushing away the dangerous taste of hope that threatened to well within.

Disappointed, Donnie gently put his paw back on the ground. "Don't worry, Mikey, I'm sure it'll all come back to you soon," he misinterpreted as Mikey stared at him in confusion. "I'm... going to look around, see if I can find anything for us to eat around here."

And with that, Donnie shot to his feet and looking all around, took off into the trees, Leo close behind.

Upset at having somehow upset Donnie, Mikey sadly watched them leave before allowing Splinter's soothing touch coax him back to his lap where he closed his eyes and slowly drifted off.

-:-

Mikey twitched as soft, twin footfalls woke him. He raised his head, watching warily as Donnie and Leo came back into view.

"It's not much but Leo and I found a little for us to eat," Donnie said quietly as they returned to the makeshift campsite. "It'll probably be easier in the daylight to find more edible foliage but then again, we really shouldn't linger. We need to get back to the road and civilisation as soon as possible."

"I quite agree, my son," Splinter said firmly. "Although, I do suggest we keep an eye out for edibles as we move come morning."

Sitting down close by, Donnie looked up at Mikey and smiled softly, "Are you hungry, Mikey?”

Mikey eagerly blinked once as he quickly sat up. Considering he hadn't eaten since before they took him, he was starving!

"I get that it's hard for you to talk right now, bro, but you could at least answer Donnie by nodding or shaking your head," Raph grunted in annoyance as he reached out for the small handful of vegetation Leo offered him, completely missing the look of panic Mikey shot him as he blinked twice rapidly and then repeated.

Donnie studied Mikey with worry and curiosity, his head canted. "Mikey?" he ventured after a bit, "is that one blink for yes and two for no?"

Mikey drew in on himself as he turned back to Donnie fearfully. The only ones he could use that method of communication with before now were his Alpha and Mai. If he dared use them around anyone else and they realised what he was doing, he would've been punished. But... but these were his brothers, his family and they were nice to him. Surely they wouldn't hurt him for it since they seemed to genuinely want to know things, he convinced himself, so he blinked once again, very deliberately. He wasn't prepared for Donnie launching himself at him and throwing his arms around him ecstatically.

"Oh, thank god for that!" Donnie breathed happily, hugging him too tightly. "It's so good to know you're still in there, Mikey!"

Mikey struggled frantically to pull free; the pressure of his collar pressed into his neck against Donnie was too much and he began panting and wheezing as he fought desperately to regain his breath.

"I-I'm sorry, Mikey," Donnie apologised the moment he realised. He immediately released his brother. "I didn't mean to choke you. So, uh... do you... do you have a meaning for three blinks?" he asked once Mikey had recovered enough that he was no longer gasping for breath.

Mikey blinked twice.

"Then how about this, if you don't understand something, blink three times, okay? That way we'll know and can try again."

Mikey thought about it for a bit as he let the words sink into his mind, interpreting them, then he blinked once.

"That's a great start and I really don't want to get too complicated but we need to be able to communicate a little more than that at the very least, so how about, four blinks for if you're thirsty, five for hungry and six when you need to stop and relieve yourself. Is that okay?"

Mikey considered it a bit, then blinked three times and Donnie repeated it more slowly in Japanese. This time, smiling slightly thanks to his growing ability to communicate, at last, Mikey blinked yes before telling Donnie he was hungry.

-:-

There was a faint snap of a twig in the woods and Mikey's eyes flew open as he lifted his head from Splinter's lap to stare where the sound came from.

"You heard that also, Michelangelo?" Splinter breathed softly.

Mikey blinked once even as he cowered, trembling, to the ground. It was his Alpha and a group of his tormentors; they were coming from downwind and he could smell them! It was all he could do not to panic!

"Leonardo, wake your brothers and prepare to escape with Michelangelo. He must not fall into Chris Bradford's hands again, even for a minute."

"Hai, Sensei," Leonardo breathed back, already rising and creeping over to shake Donnie and Raph awake.

Suddenly Mikey heard the double click of 'Heel' and horrified, he rose to all fours and began walking in Dogpound's direction, quivering in fear with every step. The double click came again and Mikey sped up, even as someone grabbed his shell and Leo commanded, [Mikey... Spot, stop!]

Mikey stopped, torn between obeying the two commands, blinking his confusion and fear up at Leo for what to do. He felt like crying, too terrified to disobey his Alpha and wanting so desperately to stay with the nice people, his brothers.

His _family_.

Foot suddenly flooded from the darkness and Leo snapped, "Donnie, get him out of here!" and hating himself for it, Donnie nodded and took out the lead, clipping it to Mikey's collar again.

"I'm so sorry, Mikey," Donnie breathed, "please forgive me." [Heel, Spot!]

With the lead on, his confusion dissipated but the overwhelming fear remained. Never-the-less, Mikey dutifully followed Donnie as his brother led him away, only stopping to quickly deal with the few ninja that escaped past their brothers and father.

-:-

No matter what they did, no matter how they tried to disguise their trail over the next day and night, whether it was walking along rocks, through water or along the road, Bradford and the Foot kept catching up to them, five whole times before Raph exploded once they put some distance between them again.

"How the hell do they keep finding us! They don't have any dogs with them so they can't be tracking us by scent and surely it's too dark to follow our trail!"

"Actually, Chris Bradford himself is a giant dog. They could be following his nose," Leo pointed out as Mikey blinked twice repeatedly but running as they were in the middle of the night, his forelegs slung around Raph and Leo's shoulders, no one was looking at him or paying any attention to him.

"Well, that's gotta be it, then!" Raph snapped in frustration. “So what do we do about it?”

"Actually, that's unlikely since we washed off in a stream and disguised our scents with mud and other things earlier," Donnie pointed out, deciding it was far better not to elaborate on what they used to disguise their scent with as they continued to run, lest Raph lose his temper yet again. "It's far more likely that Mikey has a tracker of some kind on him but I wasn't able to see anything earlier and if it is part of that collar or those shackles, there isn't much I can do about it at this point since I don't have the equipment necessary to deal with it on me."

"So we should have taken the time to get them off at the Foot Compound then?" Raph hissed in furious disbelief.

"If we did, we would have been discovered far sooner," Leo disagreed with a quick shake of his head, "and being on the Foot's home ground, they would have had the numbers to make sure we couldn't make it out again."

Frustrated, Mikey tried tapping Leo's arm to get his attention again but Leo obviously thought it was just his paw bouncing against him as they ran and ignored it.

"Leonardo is correct," Splinter spoke up. “It was far too dangerous to linger in that place.”

"Course he is, golden child can't do anything wrong," Raph muttered bitterly in Mikey's ear. Mikey glanced at Raph, frowning at the tone as he wondered what he'd meant.

"Donatello, are you able to build something to detect or perhaps block such emissions?"

"Y-yeah, of course I could, Master Splinter," Donnie replied, flabbergasted that anyone would even question such a thing. "However, not without parts. Maybe, I could program an app in the t-phone but I'd still need to find which frequency to block and either way, it would take time I don't have while we're actively running."

Mikey grit his teeth. He'd only half-understood all that but he'd picked up enough to work it out. Feeling a horrible sense of deja vu over not being listened to, he threw a foot out in front of Raph, causing him to stumble and the three of them to fall.

"What the _hell_? Why'd you trip me up, Mikey?" Raph all but yelled as he fought to untangle himself.

Mikey did his best to ignore him despite the rising fear at his anger and instead blinked repeatedly up at Donnie, hoping his brother would realise and start asking him the right questions so he could answer and 'tell them'.

"It would seem Michelangelo has something to tell us," Splinter observed calmly.

"Ugh! We don't have _time_ for this!" Raph snapped. He picked himself up then reached down, lifting Mikey up and flinging his left foreleg around his shoulder once more. Mikey struggled to fight him off.

"If it was important enough for Mikey to trip you to get our attention, it must be important enough to make time for," Leo said softly.

Mikey blinked once, slowly, at Leo before pulling free of Raph and turning back to look up at Donnie as he fell back to the ground, the heavy weight of his paws pulling him down hard.

"Do you know something about how they're tracking us?" Donnie ventured, crouching down in front of Mikey.

Mikey blinked quickly. Almost too quickly, and Donnie blinked back.

[Is it some sort of tracking device?] he asked worriedly.

'Yes!' Mikey blinked.

[Do you know where it is?]

'Yes!'

Donnie thought a little. Then, [Is it part of your collar?]

'No!'

[Your... uh... manacles?] Donnie asked, clearly trying to avoid calling them what they were designed to emulate.

'No!' Mikey blinked again, a little more desperately.

[Oh god... it's in your body somewhere,] Donnie realised, his heart sinking, [isn't it?]

Mikey hung his head in shame but not before answering yes.

[Do you know whereabouts, Mikey?]

Mikey sighed and looking back up at his brother, blinked yes again. Then before Donnie could start trying to narrow it down, he stepped forward and struggled to reach up with one cold metal paw to touch Donnie on the back of his thigh, just below his shell; damn but he was tall and hard to reach. Then he laid down on his plastron, head in the crook of his foreleg, waiting for Donnie to check for himself.

Donnie reached into his bag, pulling out a torch as he searched Mikey's thigh for any sign of the tracking chip as Leo crouched down in front of Mikey.

"You knew this all along?" he asked softly.

Mikey lifted his head and blinked up at Leo.

"Is that why you didn't want to come with us at first and why you tried to leave us the first opportunity you had?"

Mikey wasn't sure how to answer that. It was far more complicated than just yes or no. Yes, he remembered the tracking chip and that was a big part of why he'd been so afraid to go with them. It was how he'd known his Alpha could always find him and punish him for running away and then there was the fact that he didn't remember them at first. He still didn't fully but he was starting to. Mikey felt so ashamed that he'd blocked his family and his life from his memory but everything had been so hard and he'd discovered it was just easier to stop thinking about them especially knowing there was no chance of them coming for him halfway across the world.  
  
But he'd never meant to actually really forget... He'd just wanted to survive without losing his mind... but he'd lost it anyway...  
  
Even now that they were here and he was with them and beginning to remember, he was still terrified of being found and forced to go back and he knew without them here to keep such a tight hold of him, he'd have no choice but to return with his Alpha. A couple of days of being on the run with people that actually cared for him didn't fix everything.   
  
Or anything at all, for that matter.

Mikey blinked yes, then no and Leo mistook it for confusion and without any way to clarify things, Mikey didn't bother to try to correct him. He just buried his face back into the crook of his elbow, trying to block out the crawly feeling of Donnie running his hand along his upper leg lest he begin to shudder and pull away and have to face more questions he couldn't and wouldn't ever answer.  
  
Leo sighed miserably and placed a gentle hand on Mikey's head, rubbing comfortingly with his thumb. "Is there any chance you can at least try to talk?" he asked softly. "The shock collar is gone now so there's no reason for you to stay silent any longer, little brother."  
  
The tears prickled at the edge of Mikey's eyes and he just buried his face deeper.  
  
"Just one word? A sound even?” Leonardo pleaded desperately. “It's been so long since we've heard you speak and we miss your voice so much, Mikey."  
  
Not as much as him... Tensing up all over, Mikey hunched his shoulders in on himself as he fought not to shake.  
  
"Don't push him, Leo. He doesn't need that right now," Donnie reprimanded softly, looking up to fix Leo with a look that brooked no argument.  
  
Leo's mouth dropped open in shock, "But... I... right, I'm sorry, Mikey. Just...” he sighed softly, hoping Mikey wouldn't notice. He did. “Just talk again in your own time, okay? We'll all be waiting for you when you're ready."  
  
And that's when Mikey began to shake as his frustration and fear of knowing he'd never be able to speak again overwhelmed him. Worse was the fact that no one could understand because they didn't know and he had no way to tell them since he was completely unable to talk or even use his hands!  
  
"I-I found it!" Donnie suddenly exclaimed, startling him from his mini-breakdown. "At least, I found the scar from an old incision site. Right up against the edge of your carapace, Mikey! Is that the right place or was that from something else?"  
  
Mikey lifted his head and turned too-bright eyes to face Donnie, blinking once, clearly.  
  
For a moment, Donnie was elated, then he paled as he realised. "I'm sorry, Mikey, but I'll have to cut it out or they'll just keep finding us."  
  
Mikey just blinked once again. It was okay, he wanted it out anyway for his own reasons and wished he could also get Donnie to remove the ID chip he'd also been injected with at the time but that one hadn't even left a scar. Sometimes, he imagined he could still feel it sitting in his flesh but when he was being honest with himself, he knew he couldn't. Hadn't been able to since a few days after being tagged and considering the fact that he'd been doped up on a muscle relaxant that fogged his mind at the time, he couldn't even be sure which leg it was even injected into anymore. He stared at Donnie pleadingly, silently begging him to just hurry up and get it out already.  
  
Donnie took a deep breath, then held out a hand to Leo. "Tanto," he requested, already digging in his bag with his other hand for the lighter he knew was in there.  
  
"You're using a tanto to cut it out with?" Leo asked in disbelief.  
  
"I don't have much choice. It's not like I could bring the infirmary with us!" Donnie snapped, snatching at the small bladed weapon impatiently. He lit the lighter and ran it over the blade for a good minute. "Someone hold the torch for me.” Then switching to Japanese to be certain Mikey understood the first time, he added, [Mikey, I need you to kneel. It'll make it easier for me to access the site. Also, try to keep still, the last thing I want is to cut you any more than I absolutely have to.] 

Mikey gave a minuscule shrug to show it was alright, then pushed himself up. Moments later, he felt the sharp slice of the tanto as Donnie sliced into the old scar before carefully digging around inside as he searched. A minute later, Mikey winced slightly as he felt the chip shift under his skin as it was pried out and tossed aside. Donnie then pulled out the small first aid kit and quickly sewed the wound closed again.

"All over," Donnie smiled calmly as he covered the small wound with a band-aid.

Mikey turned to smile gratefully at his brother when Splinter picked up the discarded tracking chip.

"The four of you must depart now," Splinter suddenly commanded firmly. Mikey frowned up at Splinter as panic quickly began to build within him again.  
  
Was his father actually leaving them?

"I am counting on the three of you to get your brother to safety."

No! Splinter couldn't leave them! Mikey's face began to crumple as fear twisted at his gut again. They'd only just reunited! He was only just beginning to remember what having a family, people who actually cared about him was like! Splinter couldn't leave him _now_!

"The Foot are close by again," Splinter explained, his ears twitching in the direction they'd come from. "I will lead them away."

Mikey blinked 'no' rapidly. 'Please don't leave me!' he thought desperately, stepping forward on wobbly limbs as he stared beseechingly up at his father.

"Just destroy the chip so they can't track us anymore!" Raph protested and Mikey frantically blinked in agreement as he tried not to hyperventilate with his rapidly escalating fear.

Splinter smiled down sadly at Mikey, though he addressed Raphael. “You know that is not a valid option, Raphael. If they lose sight of their target, they will simply fan out and surround the area, making it far more difficult for you four to flee. No, I must lead them away. You know I am right." Then he crouched down in front of Mikey, cupping his face fondly.

"I will see you again soon, my son, I promise."

Mikey closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, trying to wordlessly communicate how much he wanted that and how much he wished Splinter would stay.

"I will meet you all at the rendezvous point," Splinter assured firmly. "If for some reason I am waylaid, do not wait for me. You must take your first chance to get back to New York. I will catch up with you there, if necessary."

Leonardo bowed his head respectfully, "Hai, Master Splinter."   
  
Mikey and Raph both shot Leo looks of disbelief that he was just agreeing to Splinter's insane plan, while Donnie simply looked resigned.  
  
"Keep your brother safe," Splinter said softly before turning his head to look into Mikey's eyes once more.   
  
[Michelangelo, allow your brothers to help you,] he commanded as Mikey stared up at him, still shaking terribly at the thought of Splinter leaving them so soon. [You must stay strong and remain by their sides, no matter what happens. Do not give in to your fear or conditioning at the hands of the Foot if they should come close again. Can you do that, my son?]  
  
Mikey hesitated, unsure, but then steeled himself and blinked once, determinedly.

Splinter smiled warmly and stood straight, looking around in the direction Mikey could now also hear the muffled crunch of light steps through the thick forest from. The pounding of his heart sped up once more.  
  
"I will see you all again soon, my sons," Splinter assured quietly before taking off at an angle away from them into the predawn darkness.  
  
"Hide," Leonardo commanded sotto voce once Splinter was out of view.   
  
Raphael immediately picked up a startled Mikey and carried him to hide amongst a cluster of bushes where he settled beside him, putting a finger to his lips to warn Mikey to keep quiet. Mikey glared in disbelief and hurt but Raph didn't seem to notice, staring out looking for threats as he was.  
  
Upset, Mikey lowered himself to the ground and tried not to sniffle as old hurts and memories flooded into his mind, memories of other times his brothers had no faith in him. He was ninja too! Or, he had been before all... this... and even without this enforced silence, he could be quiet when it really counted. So why was it when they all knew he couldn't speak, even if they didn't know the reason why, that Raph still felt the need to remind him to be quiet?  
  
Suddenly, Mikey stiffened as he heard the double click command of 'Heel' just at the edge of his hearing. He couldn't help it but he rose, taking a step forward out of the natural shelter, all the while screaming at himself to stop! To stay with his brothers where he would be safe!  
  
Then he felt Raph's warm, familiar hand on his shoulder and froze mid-step. Startled, Mikey turned his head, meeting his brother's fierce, yet protective, bright green gaze and suddenly he had control over his own actions again. He carefully, quietly stepped back and hunkered down again, leaning into Raph for comfort and security and closed his eyes while they waited for the Foot to move on.

  
-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome.
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.
> 
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.
> 
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: petaQ – contemptible person (one without honour) – Klingon. Used in place of the 'Space Heroes' version of Klingon. Fuji-san - Mount Fuji.
> 
> Sorry for the lack of other updates in the past couple of weeks. I've been a little *cough* preoccupied with trainwreck events of the real world. On the positive side, I ordered a new custom-built computer! Should only be a couple of weeks 'til I get it XD Scary thing is, I'll have to clean up my desk I turned into a dumping ground over the last 3 years, haha Y_Y
> 
> Possible trigger warning applies for this chapter.
> 
> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 12

Mikey blinked his watering eyes rapidly as the sun peaked over the horizon, blinding him with its dazzling brilliance.

Once the Foot were well gone, Leo had emerged from the shadows followed closely by Donnie. Then, wordlessly, Leo helped Raph to pull Mikey to his feet again and the foursome began running through the dense cedar woods once more. Shortly before dawn, they finally reached the mountainous, winding road and keeping to the edge of it in case of traffic and the need to dart back into the protective forest, they began running along it. Now tiring, they raced around a bend and were met with the brilliant sight of the rising sun over the side of Fuji-san.

Despite their father's many stories when they were young, they'd never actually imagined seeing such a thing for themselves and for a moment, all four brothers were overwhelmed by the glorious beauty but all too soon that moment was broken by the sound of a vehicle approaching from behind. Leo motioned with his head to the left and the four dove back into the forest, ducking just in time to see a small bus full of sleepy tourists sail past.

"Come on, let's go," Leo said softly when the sound of the engine was long gone from Mikey's hearing. Mikey stared up at Leo with a plaintive look; he was so tired. Yes, Raph and Leo were helping him but he wasn't used to moving on two legs anymore and even with his arms around their shoulders, the weights of the paws encasing his hands and wrists were weighing him down and hurting like hell.

"I'm sorry, Mikey, we can't afford to stop," Leo murmured apologetically, reading his mind as he and Raph forced Mikey to his feet again. "We need to keep moving. We're still far too close to Foot territory and we need to put as much distance between us and them as we can before there is too much traffic on the road."

"That's unlikely to take long," Donnie pointed out matter-of-factly as he edged out onto the road once more. None of them felt comfortable running along the road being so exposed as it was, especially given the morning light, but it was far easier to run three-abreast there, than in the dense human-made forest.

Mikey sighed miserably but tried his best to help support his own weight, despite how sore and stiff his legs were after just over two days on the run.

They had to duck for cover another six times before they came across a small road leading off the main one to a tourist area. It was here that Leo decided to turn down, much to Donnie and Raph's annoyance.

"Are you insane, Leo?" Raph snapped, making Mikey wince in fright and try to pull away. "God knows how many people will be down there!"

"Raph's right! You know we can't go there!" Donnie immediately chimed in. "It's far too dangerous, even this early in the morning. We'll be seen for sure!"

"Staying exposed by the main road is far more dangerous,” Leo countered firmly. “It's getting busier with each passing minute. At least down here, we might be able to find some transport."

Mikey blinked in confusion at Leo. Transport? Was Leo, his straight-laced, goody-goody brother really talking about...

"Stealing? You want us to steal someone's car?"

"Borrow," Leo immediately corrected, “and preferably a van rather than a car.”

"What, you plan to bring it back after we're done?" Raph asked sarcastically with a short disbelieving laugh. "Perhaps leave a note explaining how we're so sorry but we had no choice but we'll leave it at such and such a place to collect at a set time?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Raphael," Leo retorted in a prickly tone.

"Borrowing implies returning it afterwards. How are we supposed to do such a thing?" Donnie asked, staring Leo down.

'Yeah, Leo,' Mikey agreed silently, blinking once in Leo's direction to show his agreement with their brothers.

Leo sighed, "Fine, then we are stealing but we'll leave it somewhere safe and in good condition with a note asking for the vehicle to be returned to the owner with an apology."

Raph snorted derisively and pulled Mikey and Leo, off the road as a vehicle turned into it. "Look, I'm not arguing that we shouldn't do this," Raph grunted, "I mean, we don't exactly have a lot of choice right now, I'm only shocked that _you're_ the one suggesting it!"

Leo fixed Raph with a sideways look.

"It's just you're such a self-righteous bastard that I never would have guessed you had it in you. Normally, the rest of us would probably have to knock you out and drag you into the stolen car to make you even consider such a 'dishonourable' act."

Leo stiffened, offended. "Well, as you just said, Raphael, we don't exactly have much choice right now. We need to put as much distance between us and this area as we can to keep Mikey safe and this is the only option open to us. We're still close enough that if the Foot realise using the tracking device is no longer an option, they could still set the dogs on us to find us."

Mikey wilted in shame. It was all his fault Leo was considering doing something so bad... If only he hadn't been so weak as to get captured in the first place or he'd been strong enough to fight back, then Leo never would have to debase himself so. Leonardo would always do whatever was necessary for his family, he now remembered, but doing this would hurt him deep down in his soul.

"Hey," he felt a hand suddenly cup his chin, pushing it up so he was forced to meet his brother's reddish eyes, "Don't blame yourself, Mikey, none of this is your fault," Donnie said softly, making Leo and Raph abruptly stop arguing to also look at him in worry.

Mikey wrenched his head away from his brother's hand; he had no idea! How could he? Donnie hadn't been there, only he was! He was probably goofing around that night, as usual, leading to all of this! His Alpha probably took advantage of his usual lack of focus, beat him and dragged him back to... he gasped and started to tremble as the terrifying memories of the Shredder condemning him flooded his mind.

“ _Bradford, make arrangements to ship it to the Foot Compound in Japan where it will never be found again. You'll be joining it to make sure it gets there safely.”_

_“At once, Master Shredder,” Dogpound replied in a pleased tone, bowing deeply again._

_Mikey gasped in horror.“You can't do this!” he yelled desperately._

“ _On the contrary, you reptilian freak, I can do as I like,” Shredder smiled nastily behind his mask. Then he turned to Bradford, fixing his unnerving, scarred visage on the former human. “The next time I see either of you, I want it cowed and obedient. Have it trained like the mongrel it is.”_

He hadn't thought about that night in so long. Hadn't remembered the Shredder handing him over to his Alpha. Mikey shook his head wildly, trying to clear it of the horrible memories of being helplessly dragged down to the dungeon, of being collared and branded, all after Shredder's damning words of 'treating it like the mongrel it is' and not wanting to see him again until he was trained to be obedient.

_No!_

He didn't _want_ to remember!

Why did his brothers have to come after him after so long?

_Why did they have to make him remember?_

Unable to help himself, he glanced down at his upper left arm, catching sight of the once vicious brand proving to all who saw it that he was property of the Foot and he cried out, the only sound escaping him that of harsh, gasping breath.

He was far better off not remembering but they just had to find a way to come after him and force him to remember, didn't they? They were better off without such a useless, pathetic failure as him, someone who only ever disappointed everyone around him and caused trouble so why couldn't they have just stayed home and left him to his fate?

"Mikey!"

"Hey, what's wrong, bro?"

He fought desperately to pull away from probing hands, from octopus arms seeking to hold him, to contain him.

_"What's wrong with him, Donnie?"_

"I-I don't know! I-If I had to guess, I would think he's caught up in a flashback or something. God knows what he's been through all these months and he can't tell us, meaning he's forced to bottle it up inside. B-but I don't think the sight of that brand is helping!"

An impatient snarl sounded out making him recoil and suddenly a red cloth blocked his view of the hated burn, wrapping around his upper arm. Then he was pulled in tight by emerald green arms that ensconced him, rubbing at his shell. Breathing raggedly and gasping for air as he slowly became aware of more arms wrapping around them, around him and of soothing words being repeated in a low tone over and over, Mikey finally buried his head into Raph's shoulder, shutting out the world as best he could.

-:-

"Is he finally asleep?" Leo asked softly as he continued to drive the van they'd eventually managed to steal along the road.

"Yeah, poor kid's exhausted," Raph answered after a few moments, causing Mikey to frown ever-so-slightly and shift to bury himself deeper into his brother's side.

"Physically, mentally and emotionally," Donnie added quietly from his seat beside Leo. "Not that any of us are much better, right now. Are you sure you're alright to drive, Leo?"

"I'll be okay," Leo replied after an almost too-long pause. "Once we put some distance between Fuji-san and ourselves, I'll find somewhere we can pull off the road to rest for a few hours."

Mikey felt Raph move slightly as he nodded. "If you need a break, let us know. We can take turns driving."

Leo snorted in tired amusement, causing Raph to bristle under him, "Would you even remember to drive on the left, Raph?"

"When I see oncoming traffic, sure!"

"Well, I think we can all see it doesn't take a genius to realise you shouldn't be driving in Japan, Raph," Donnie teased lightly.

“Or anywhere, for that matter,” Leo chuckled. Mikey briefly fought the urge to smile in faint, sleepy amusement.

Raph growled warningly and the stolen van was filled with silence other than the soothing hum of tyres running over smooth asphalt, allowing Mikey to sink closer to sleep.

After a time, Leo sighed quietly. "Now he's finally asleep, tell us about him, Don. What have those petaQ done to him?" Leo didn't use such language lightly and Mikey could quite easily imagine Leo's hands clenching the wheel, the blood forced from his knuckles at the tightness of his grip.

"I haven't exactly had a chance to sit down and examine or question him, Leo," Donnie replied stiffly.

There was silence for a moment, then, "I know that Donnie but knowing you, you have made some observations and come to some conclusions. Just... tell us what you can. We need to know."

There was another soft sigh from the front, this time from Donatello.

"Well, even without seeing him, it's pretty obvious to tell that he's been physically, mentally and emotionally abused this whole time," Donnie began hesitantly.

"Yeah," Raph grunted, " but we knew that would be the case from the moment he'd been taken."

He heard Donnie swallow nervously from the front seat and Mikey almost forced himself to sit up and reach out to Donnie, knowing that would stop him. However, as much as Mikey wanted to, for his own sake as much as his brother's, he knew Leo and Raph needed to know just as much for their own peace of mind so he stayed still because they'd all shut up again if they realised he was actually awake and listening.

And... and it wasn't like he could answer their questions...

Suddenly, Donnie started speaking again, his voice clipped and clinical as if he'd locked away his emotions in order to cope. Sounding like that, Donnie reminded him of Mai when she was working on him and it was all he could do to suppress his shuddering to avoid giving himself away.

"Some things we can be sure of are that they've treated Mikey like an animal, like a dog. We've seen proof of his conditioning in how he responds to common commands, both verbal and non-verbal. The way they'd shackled him was obviously an attempt to emulate dog-like behaviour as much as possible, given that his arms and legs are not naturally designed the same way. Those..." Donnie's voice broke and for a moment, it was obvious he struggled to go on, "metal paws have been welded in place to ensure Mikey would not be able to get them off, effectively rendering him helpless between those and the shackles that were on his legs when we found him and I can only imagine the burns he sustained in the process and the intense pain it caused as a result."

Raph's arm around him tightened slightly as if unwilling to ever let him go again and Mikey was more than happy to stay right there, where it was safe.

"It is also obvious that collar has cut into him numerous times, judging by the scarring and callouses on his neck around it. Then there are both faded and recent burn marks from being electrocuted by the shock collar I removed back at the Foot base."

"Speaking of that thing," Raph spoke up, his voice taut with pain and barely suppressed anger, "why won't he talk? And don't give me that bullshit about being trained not to! That might be part of it but you saw him earlier! He was screaming but he didn't make a damn sound! There's no way that just training him not to speak would stop him from even making a sound when he's freaking out that much!"

"You're right Raph, it... it wouldn't,” Donnie admitted hesitantly, “but trauma might."

"What kind of trauma stops someone from being able to even make a sound?"

Donnie shrugged reluctantly. "I'm not a psychologist, Raph but it could be anything. I've read all kinds of accounts how the simplest things like the trauma of losing a loved one or things such as repeated torture or torment, even just being forced to keep terrible secrets can cause someone to become mute."

"What kinds of secrets..?"

There was silence and Mikey figured Donnie couldn't bring himself to elaborate and he was extremely thankful for that.

"You said they treated him like a dog, Don," Leo spoke up hesitantly, "is... is it possible that they removed his voicebox like some humans do to stop dogs from barking?"

"They don't actually remove their voiceboxes when they debark dogs, Leo, they cut their vocal cords and it doesn't make dogs unable to bark, it just mutes them significantly so they sound like they have a raspy voice like a person with a bad throat infection."

"So you don't think that's what happened to Mikey?"

"I don't," Donnie replied firmly. "It would be a waste of time and effort doing that if they were trying to stop Mikey from talking altogether."

"Then what do you think..."

"I don't know, Leo!" Donnie snapped. “If I knew, I'd tell you and then I'd be doing everything in my power to fix it!”

"Sorry, Donnie."

"N-no, I'm the one who's sorry. I-I shouldn't have snapped at you like that."

"It's okay, we're used to you being irritable when you're stressed."

And boy were they, Mikey remembered distantly.

Donnie took in a deep breath and everyone was quiet for a few minutes until Raph broke the silence again.  
  
“Once upon a time if someone told me there was a way to shut Mikey up for just five minutes, I'd have been demanding they tell me how and asking how long it would take to do it. Now... I'd give anything to hear his voice again...” he said softly, his own voice breaking as he spoke.

“You and me both, Raph,” Donnie replied in a strained tone.

Mikey clenched his fists as best he could within the giant metal paws, trying not to wince at the discomfort it caused in case it gave him away.

"What else can you tell us?" Leo asked softly after another minute to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Well, it's all conjecture at this point but there is evidence to suspect that someone's been experimenting on him. Small slices of skin removed, a few cuts here and there obviously made by someone skilled with a scalpel, old track marks... Nothing major as if whoever it was was trying to be careful with their only specimen but... it's evidence nonetheless... and then there's..."

"There's what, Donnie?" Leo pressed when Donnie fell silent again.

"No, I can't be sure," Donnie replied, obviously shaking his head from the way his voice sounded.

"Can't be sure of what?" Raph growled threateningly, tightening his hold on Mikey again and causing Mikey to wince slightly.

"Nothing. Just forget I said anything."

"Yeah, you're really trying my patience, Donatello."

"Too bad, Raphael," Donnie replied too coolly. Then he sighed again, changing the subject. "Mikey's going to have a lot of trouble adjusting to being able to walk properly again after ten months of being unable."

_Ten months?_ Mikey stiffened, unsure whether to be relieved it was only ten months or aghast that it had taken his brothers so long to find him.

"We'll just ha..."

"Guys," Raph spoke up tightly and Mikey felt a slight movement from him.

"Mikey's awake, isn't he?" Donnie asked flatly.

"Yeah," Raph grunted reluctantly.

The jig was up. Mikey fluttered his eyes open and looked up to see Leo's concerned gaze focused on him in the rear vision mirror and Donnie turned in his seat, facing him.

"How long have you been awake?" Donnie asked gently and all Mikey could do was shrug and give a small, sheepish smile.

Leo sighed. "The whole time," he confirmed. Mikey looked away. "You should have let us know you were awake, Mikey. Why didn't you?"

"How's he supposed to answer that?" Raph snorted as Mikey yawned in response.

"Because you're tired and were trying to sleep," Donnie interpreted.

Mikey blinked once in confirmation. That, of course, wasn't the only reason but it was part of it. Even if he couldn't sleep, just resting helped and took the edge off.

"Still, you should have let us know and we would have stopped talking about you," Donnie continued apologetically.

Mikey huffed. They'd needed to, he knew that and who was he to upset his brothers more than he already had just because he was uncomfortable hearing them talk about him?

Donnie sighed and reached a hand back, resting it comfortingly on Mikey's knee. Mikey's gaze fixed on it. "Still, next time, tell us. We don't want to make you more uncomfortable and we can easily wait until you're actually asleep."

Mikey blinked in agreement, knowing full well he'd do no such thing. Then, he settled back down, head on Raph's lap again and closed his eyes, trying to sleep once more.

-:-

He'd allowed the quiet hum of the van on the road to lull him to light sleep at last but every time someone spoke or suddenly moved, he was instantly awake again. That had been his new normal for quite some time now if he was honest, something that living in constant terror had long since taught him. He was pretty good at feigning continued sleep when necessary though and that was a skill that had come in handy, he'd discovered during a few late-night visits by Three-Five-Eight and his friends when they'd come looking for entertainment. Luckily for him, if he didn't react, they often lost interest, though there were certainly times they worked hard to 'wake' him up instead, especially in the earlier days... Unfortunately, after earlier when his brothers realised he'd been awake all along, they'd paid closer attention to him and soon realised the slightest noise woke him now or kept him awake if he hadn't had the chance to fall asleep.

Mikey blinked his eyes open and turned his head to look up at Raph. His brother, too, had finally fallen asleep, his head resting heavily against the window and he was lightly snoring away. Mikey gave a slight smile. He hadn't realised just how much he'd missed the raucous sound of Raph's snoring or that it would even be possible to miss it.

"You didn't sleep long, Mikey," Donnie observed quietly. "Did we wake you again?"

'No,' Mikey blinked, once he'd turned his head to face front again.

"Are you alright?"

Mikey gave a minuscule nod, then blinked instead, hoping desperately that Donnie missed it. But a delighted grin split Donnie's features, sending a thrill of utter terror coursing through Mikey's veins.

"That's the first time you've nodded since we got you back!" Donnie exclaimed happily. Mikey's heart began to pound heavily in his plastron.

A delighted grin split Dogpound's wide, furry features, [That's the first time you've nodded for a couple of weeks now, Spot. Guess it's too much to think you'd have learnt already.] Dogpound's smile turned cruel as he began dragging a struggling Mikey towards the vet surgery without even stopping to put the muzzle on him first. [Mai will be so happy,] he purred, [she's been wanting to examine how you heal so fast compared to humans and has been asking when you'd be paying her another visit.]

"I'm sorry! Please d-don't take to Mai," Mikey begged silently, wishing like hell he still had a voice to protest with as he struggled all the way, trying desperately to ignore the choking of the collar cutting into his throat as he was dragged flailing across grass, gravel and dirt.

[Oh ho! The little mongrel earns itself a second session with the scary surgeon for forgetting its place and pretending it's more than the pathetic, useless mutt it really is,] Bradford guffawed in delight.

Mikey's eyes flew wide in horror and though he was panicking, he fought to keep his mouth shut.

All too soon, the dreaded building loomed in front of him and Dogpound opened the door to drag him inside. Mikey cried out ever-so-silently and scrabbled desperately at the door frame, attempting yet again to hang on with metal paws that couldn't bend or grip but as always, it was no good. Bradford pulled harshly at the lead and his vision blacking momentarily, Mikey collapsed and was dragged helplessly inside.

"Mikey? What's wrong?" Donnie asked, alarm filling his voice.

Leo eased his foot off the accelerator and slowed down as he looked back at Mikey in the rearview mirror.

Mikey rapidly blinked, 'no,' pushing himself up and cringing frantically back into the corner of the seat furthest from Raphael.

"You can't tell us nothing's wrong when clearly there is something wrong," Leo frowned as Mikey's heart sped up further as fresh panic took over.

How could he have been so stupid? Human gestures like nodding and shaking his head got him punished every time and he'd been so good for ages now. Tears filled his eyes and he was helpless to stop them from overflowing as he feared what she'd do to him this time!

Mai smiled excitedly as Dogpound dumped Mikey painfully on the floor at her feet. Dogpound, fed up with his fighting, yanked back the leash to stun him before proceeding to pick Mikey up and carry him inside.

[Has someone been a naughty boy?] Mai asked in the tone of an adult talking to a small child or pet as she followed them into the surgery and Mikey cowered away in fright. [Well, we'll just have to see about correcting that bad behaviour.] She whirled around and walked over to the phone on her desk to call for her assistants. A few minutes later, two ninja entered, including Three-Five-Eight and Mikey quailed at the sight and smell of him. Without a word, the pair stripped him of the shackles on his legs and lifted him onto the table, strapping him down even as he fought fiercely against it, knowing all the while there was no escape.

There was never any escape.

[Lift the subject's head,] Mai commanded, emotionless.

Three-Five-Eight did as she bade, even as Bradford grunted, arms crossed, [What's the deal with the stupid helmet anyway? It's not like it keeps his head tied down.]

Mai smiled coldly. [Cuts off his hearing. Hakuba wants him isolated as much as possible to aide his training, remember? That's why no...]

At that moment, the helmet was clipped in place and switched on, activating the white noise filter that prevented Mikey from hearing them talk. Still struggling futilely, he glared defiantly up at Mai, staring at her mouth. 'Joke's on you crazy lady, I can still lip-read!' he thought insolently. Then he realised that though he could see her lips moving, he couldn't understand a word she said and a fresh chill filled his soul.

Learning to lip-read while growing up was a requirement of their ninja training. However, since they weren't human, they were forced to learn it by watching television with the sound muted and in New York, with the few stations available to them in the sewers, they'd only been able to learn to lip-read English and in this nightmarish place, no one spoke ever English around him anymore.

A fresh determination filled him as he realised he would just have to learn to lip-read Japanese. Then his heart sank. Dogpound, Mai and Hakuba were the only ones he could even see the lips of as everyone else wore full-body uniforms which completely covered their faces. To make matters worse, being so low to the ground, he only rarely saw their faces as they spoke and Dogpound wasn't human anymore either.

He was so screwed.

Suddenly, a green and purple blur rushed him and Mikey screamed, trying and failing to raise his paws to ward them off, to fight back but they were just far too heavy to be effective.

He might've become used to them enough to move quite fast on all fours when need be but lifting them to defend himself with was another story.

Olive green arms snaked around him, entrapping him and pulling him forward and Mikey panicked all the more as he fought against the firm hold. His breathing sped up but he couldn't get enough air and he quickly began to feel lightheaded.

He sobbed hysterically as they held him down, making a game out of violating him in turns, playing with him like a toy.

"Mikey, calm down, it's just me, it's Donnie!"

He couldn't escape! His saloon door had been bolted closed again so he couldn't run when they first entered, chains then clipped onto the D-rings welded to his paws and stretched taut across the length of his kennel, his muzzle tightly in place so he couldn't bite again.

"It's okay, you're safe now. You're with us now, you're with your brothers."

"What the hell's going on?"

His braces removed and replaced with shackles tight around his ankles, forcing him spread-eagled onto his plastron with his tail cruelly yanked aside and clipped painfully out of the way.

"Mikey, look at me! It's me, Donnie. Leo and Raph are here too. You're alright now. You're safe!”

He quailed in terror and pain, trying fruitlessly to break free.

"Mikey! You have to calm down!"

_No!_ He wanted them off of him! _Get off! Please!_ He sobbed desperately.

"He's getting more worked up by the second. Donnie, we need to sedate him before he hurts himself or one of us."

Mikey's eyes opened wide as she jabbed a needle into his leg, feeling the cool rush of liquid injecting swiftly into his body.

_No!_ _Please! Not this again! Why wouldn't anyone help him?_

"With _what,_ Leo?"

A now familiar but weird numbness spread quickly throughout his body. It was becoming so hard to think, to move, yet he was still awake and aware. He could feel as she spread his jaws painfully apart, reaching in with scalpel and forceps.

"Ugh! I'll do it!"

A sudden stab of pain exploded against his neck. Then all went dark.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Honestly, that last section I agonised about how to handle it since it was mostly choppy pieces of flashbacks instead of a solid flashback but in the end, I decided not to italicise the past because Mikey himself was confused and caught up in it. He couldn't tell the difference between now and then so therefore, I left it as you read it.
> 
> Don't forget to let me know what you think :-)
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey jolted upright with a terrified, silent cry, his breathing harsh and panting as he stared wildly about, taking in surroundings he wasn't entirely sure he could believe in.
> 
> The van! He was in a van on the run across Japan! After so long, his brothers and father actually really, truly came for him!
> 
> Suddenly, his panicked gaze caught Donnie's and he watched as his worried brother hesitantly reached out to him as if scared of his reaction.
> 
> "Are you alright now, Mikey?" Donnie asked gently, concern and unbelievable warmth filling his voice.
> 
> His face crumpled and it was all he could do not to sob as he remembered that first day.
> 
> Donnie gently placed a thick finger under his jaw, tilting his head gently up to look him in the eye. "Mikey..."
> 
> Mikey blinked away the tears before throwing himself at his brother, desperate for reassurance and Donnie wrapped his arms around the distraught turtle tenderly, rubbing soothing circles against his shell.
> 
> "It's alright, you're safe now, buddy. I've got you and I'm never letting them take you again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Possible trigger warning applies for this chapter.
> 
> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 13

Exhausted, Mikey stood shivering violently in the field as the icy cold wind whipped viciously past him. He'd been dragged out of his warm kennel – warm compared to outside, that was - into the cold, late Autumn air before the sun had even cleared the horizon that morning, all before being given breakfast or being allowed to drink. Luckily, it wasn't hot, he thought sourly as his intense thirst pressed down on him, making him feel far wearier than he normally would.

His trainer had forced him through his paces eight times before he was satisfied enough to tell him to stand in his corner and watch as he worked the other animals. Despite the chilled mud he stood in, all Mikey wanted was to lie down and curl in on himself for warmth but that was denied him as Dogpound stood ever vigilant and looking for any excuse to electrocute him with that damn collar yet again.

Mikey tossed a small, quick glare Bradford's way before immediately turning his attention back to Hakuba who'd commanded him to pay attention and learn by watching before forcing the awful white noise helmet on his head, this time fastening it with the simple strap instead of a solid piece of plastic that kept his jaw closed when it was used in the surgery or lab. He shook his head violently, wishing he could dislodge the nasty thing so he could hear but it was strapped on securely and it wouldn't come off until someone took pity on him and removed it.

The day dragged on for hours and his arms and legs began to wobble from standing so still, along with the cold and lack of food and water. He felt dizzy and sick, overwhelmed by the constant white noise and his thoughts began to turn fuzzy as it became harder to think against the constant sound droning them out.

Finally, a random ninja ran towards Hakuba and took the leash from him, leading the large vicious dog away and Hakuba turned back towards him. Mikey blinked watery eyes, irritated from the wind and small bits of grit that had blown into them as the dog trainer came close. Suddenly, the man made a sign with his hands and Mikey shrank back, staring in confusion and not a little fear.

He was supposed to know this from having watched Hakuba working with the other dogs the last few hours but his mind and body were weary, exhausted from cold, hunger, thirst and tiredness.

The man repeated his command and Mikey canted his head, still not understanding and ready to just fall over where he stood. He'd barely even slept the night before, having had to put up with the company of his tormentors for hours on end on top of a day spent with Mai which resulted in him puking up his dinner the night before.

Suddenly, Hakuba locked eyes with someone behind him and before a fearful Mikey could turn to look, a painful jolt of electricity surged into his neck and he cried out soundlessly, collapsing to the cold mud beneath him.

-:-

Mikey jolted upright with a terrified, silent cry, his breathing harsh and panting as he stared wildly about, taking in surroundings he wasn't entirely sure he could believe in.

The van! He was in a van on the run across Japan! After so long, his brothers and father actually really, truly came for him!

Suddenly, his panicked gaze caught Donnie's and he watched as his worried brother hesitantly reached out to him as if scared of his reaction.

"Are you alright now, Mikey?" Donnie asked gently, concern and unbelievable warmth filling his voice.

His face crumpled and it was all he could do not to sob as he remembered that first day of visual commands training. He'd been forced to stand again, watching as yet another dog was brought out and trained. Mikey had tried harder to pay attention but it hadn't done any good. He'd been punished again and again until he finally wearily put one paw forward and went to Hakuba, hoping that 'come' was what was meant. No electricity seared his neck so he figured he'd been right but why couldn't the man have just used a simple 'come here' beckoning of fingers like any other normal person would have?

He knew the answer of course. Because he was no longer a person, normal or otherwise. At least... not in their eyes.

Then the Foot trainer tested him on other commands and Mikey ended up punished, again and again, this time with the studded strap Hakuba always carried and it wasn't until the sun went down before Mikey was returned to his kennel at last, where he collapsed just inside the door. His leash removed but the white noise helmet left in place as the door locked behind him.

It felt like hours later when Bradford returned with his meal, kicking him away from the doorway and Mikey could barely even open his eyes to watch the former human. The bowl was placed down on the ground farthest from him and the door locked behind him again.

The smell of the food called to Mikey's twisting stomach and eventually, he pulled himself along the floor to eat, grimacing in disgust as he realised it was the canned dog food again. Bradford made it a point of sticking to Mai's commands about his care to the letter. She'd told him early on he must stick to the recommended diet at least five days a week and Bradford took that upon himself to mean he could give Mikey whatever the hell else he wanted the other two days a week, be it actual dogfood or leftover table scraps from the mess hall. Once, he'd even just supplied Mikey with a bone to chew on with small bits of meat and gristle left on it and if he didn't eat what he was given, he wasn't given anything else until he did. Mikey had learnt on the ship that if he left it too long and was eventually force-fed the so-called food, he'd wind up sick afterwards.

Sighing miserably and still stuck with the white noise helmet on, Mikey ate, unaware of the door opening behind him and a solitary ninja making their way towards him.

Moments later, he was dragged away from his meal, such as it was, to outside where Three-Five-Eight washed the mud off him using freezing cold water before visually commanding him back inside.

Donnie gently placed a thick finger under his jaw, tilting his head gently up to look him in the eye. "Mikey..."

Mikey blinked away the tears before throwing himself at his brother, desperate for reassurance and Donnie wrapped his arms around the distraught turtle tenderly, rubbing soothing circles against his shell.

"It's alright, you're safe now, buddy. It's okay, I've got you and I'm never letting them take you again."

Mikey stayed wrapped in Donnie's embrace until long after his shaking died down before eventually pulling away and blinking six times in embarrassment. Donnie gazed at him for a moment. Then realisation dawned.

"Oh right! You need to go! Um, okay, just give me a moment," Donnie let him go and stood up, moving across the van to open the sliding door.

Still trembling slightly from the recent assault of memories, Mikey carefully stepped off the seat onto the floor and made his way across the van.

"Is he alright?" he heard Leo ask softly as he approached the door.

Donnie glanced back at him with a reassuring smile, before turning back to Leo. "Not entirely but he's doing better than earlier," Donnie answered quietly.

Mikey stiffened slightly in embarrassment before jumping down from the van to the ground.

"Hey!" Raph barked in surprise but Mikey ignored him, dashing directly for the bushes and darting behind them.

"Where's he going?" Leo asked, even as Raph made to go after Mikey.

"Call of nature," Donnie answered succinctly. "Give him some privacy, Raph."

"But what if he tries to take off again? You know, if someone comes along and commands him to heel or something?"

"There's no Foot around for miles," Donnie replied dismissively as he gazed worriedly after Mikey, "and even if there are, they don't know where we are. He'll be fine. Just give him some space for a couple of minutes."

Mikey stared miserably back in the direction of his brothers' voices as he took care of his needs, at once glad they were looking out for him and upset that they didn't trust him when he noticed the faint music of running water from nearby. He turned his head and gazed longingly towards it, unable to see any sign of it. For a moment, he considered going back to his brothers to let them know about it but he was so thirsty, hot and emotionally wrung out, not to mention being unable to speak, that against his better judgement, he quietly took a step away from them, making his way towards the melodious tinkle gently ringing out from across the rocks and through leaves and low hanging branches.

Without realising he'd even arrived, Mikey found himself standing in water up to his elbows. The water rushed past invitingly and he ducked his head happily, taking the chance to drink directly from it when a voice exploded from nearby.

"So this is where you went! Mikey! How could you just wander off like that? We were worried sick!"

Mikey looked guiltily up at Raph who stood on the bank of the stream and he shrank back in shame.

"What if you couldn't find your way back, huh? What if we couldn't find you!" Raphael continued berating angrily, not seeming to notice how Mikey shuddered, terror written all over him.

"The ground's too hard around here! We couldn't even find your tracks..."

"That's enough Raph, you aren't helping," Leonardo interjected mildly as he stepped into view from the foliage. His sharp gaze fixed on Mikey even as he placed a calming hand on Raphael's arm.

"What the hell do you mean?" Raph retorted furiously, whirling on Leo. "Master Splinter told him to stay with us no matter what before he left! He's helpless on his own! Can't help but obey commands like a..."

"Raphael!' Leonardo snapped, struggling to contain his own temper.

"Look at him, Raph," Donnie spoke up quietly as he too arrived. "Just stop talking and really look at him. You're scaring him. Again."

Open-mouthed, Raph stopped and turned to see the way Mikey quivered, to see the fear etched deeply into his face, eyes and in fact entire body.

"Do you want a repeat of what happened earlier, where you were forced to knock him out with pressure points?" Donnie continued softly, his forced calmness not quite able to hide how exasperated he'd become. "Because I sure don't."

Raphael slumped in defeat, "I still don't know what happened then, you never explained."

Donnie took a ragged breath, "Well, I'm not too sure myself. I haven't exactly had a chance to examine the facts as I was far too busy trying to look after our distraught and abused brother."

Leo glanced at the pair before turning back to Mikey and walking closer to the water's edge. "No one's going to hurt you, Mikey," he promised softly. "Can you please come out of the water?"

Mikey managed to tear his gaze away from Raph but he couldn't meet Leo's eyes. Shakily, he began to make his way out, whimpering silently to himself until he stood trembling on the shore, his head hanging from fear and shame. Leo crouched down beside him.

"It's alright, you're not in trouble, just... please don't wander off like that again," Leo pleaded desperately. "Raph's right, you really scared us when you disappeared again. We can't take that kind of fright anymore."

He tentatively lifted his head, trying to look his brother in the eyes to communicate how sorry he was but it was impossible to hold the gaze for more than a second.

Crushed by the situation, Leo sighed despondently, "Come on, let's head back to the van before we forget the way. We might not be in the Aokigahara anymore but the forest around here is still thick and far too easy to get lost in."

His curiosity momentarily overtaking his fear, Mikey canted his head in recognition. Aokigahara? He knew the name but couldn't remember where he'd heard it before.

Leo rested a hand on the top of his head for a moment. "That's the famous forest where so many people go to commit suicide because of how dense and easy to get lost in it it is and as it happens, it's also where the Foot hid their base," he explained sombrely. "Honestly, we might not have been able to navigate it safely without Master Splinter's tracking abilities earlier."

Master Splinter... Mikey felt a terrible ache rip through him at the new reminder and he glanced warily over at Raph who stood nearby, obviously trying to control his impatience and agitation. Raph had been right, Master Splinter had expected him to stay with his brothers no matter what.

 _[Michelangelo, allow your brothers to help you,]_ he'd commanded. _[You must stay strong and remain by their sides, no matter what happens. Do not give in to your fear or conditioning at the hands of the Foot if they should come close again. Can you do that, my son?]_

Mikey shuddered. He hadn't given in to his fear in this case; his attention was just caught by the water he'd so desperately wanted, by his thirst and intense need to feel clean again but in doing so, he'd gone against his former owner's... no, he shook his head wildly to shake that way of thinking from his mind, his _father's_ expectations and scared his brothers yet again.

Leo sighed and stood, turning around to look for where they'd come from. He was great at tracking in the city or the sewers but none of them had ever left the city before. They knew the theory of tracking in more natural environments but in practice was another story.

Mikey blinked at the intense concentration in his brother's body, then, despite the shame, decided to help him out.

Ignoring the fact the Foot knew he wasn't really a dog, they'd treated him like one in every aspect. From his housing conditions with its oversized kennel (to accommodate for his Alpha's handling of him) to his run and outdoor defecation site to his training, which had also included learning to track by scent like any other dog. He wasn't as good as the real dogs by any means but he'd learnt his sense of smell was far superior to a human's; surprising really since he'd grown up in the sewers with his olfactory senses continually assaulted every single day of his life. While more difficult for him, not to mention embarrassing, he'd learnt soon enough that scent tracking was one thing he didn't get punished for. Of course, they were never going to use him in the field since he was actually a prisoner but Master Hakuba had made sure of teaching him everything regardless, in his efforts of helping Dogpound to break him.

Mikey put his nose to the ground and sniffed around, looking for his own tracks. He quickly found them, then began leading his flabbergasted brothers back towards the van.

Donnie was the first to speak. "So you wouldn't have been lost, Mikey?" he asked, awestruck.

Mikey paused, turning to blink twice in answer.

"Great, that's just great," Raph bit out, his jaw clenched in anger. "Now, never do this again, Mikey! You aren't a damn dog, you're a turtle!"

Leo shot Raph a rebuking look as Mikey wilted in shame.

"What? He's not and he should stop behaving like one!"

"Actually, Raph, turtles do have an acute sense of smell, far better than humans," Donnie piped up, scratching nervously at the back of his neck. "It helps them to find food in the wild."

Raph glared at Donnie unappreciatively. "Now who's not helping?"

"If we were still natural turtles, following the scent of food or even water would be entirely normal. In our case, our sense of smell has been somewhat muted by our mutations but it's still very strong compared with humans."

Mikey turned wide, grateful eyes on Donnie for helping him feel a little better about himself.

"We only never really thought about it due to living in the sewers all our lives and not having anything to compare to other than Master Splinter. Even so, there has certainly been times topside or in the lair where our sense of smell has come in handy and surprised or embarrassed April," Donnie smiled tightly, skin darkening in shame.

Feeling like the answer why was on the tip of his tongue, Mikey frowned, struggling and failing to recall who April was and just why Donnie would have been embarrassed by that.

Leo nodded sagely as if he'd realised all along but Raph still looked miffed. Thankfully, he declined to comment further and instead just silently followed them as Mikey led the way.

Soon after, they were back at the van and Leo and Raph made to sit down. Mikey looked around, eyes wide to see how they'd camouflaged their borrowed vehicle.

"After you... uh... got upset earlier, I decided to find a place to pull over out of sight of the road," Leo explained, noticing Mikey's curiosity. "We were also getting a little low on gas but we can't afford to ditch the van and take another in broad daylight. Anyway, I figured we could all use a rest since we've been on the go almost non-stop other than a couple of brief breaks here and there."

Mikey blinked once in acknowledgement as Donatello disappeared inside the van.

"We'll stay until dark, then we'll leave and find another tourist site to leave the van safely at. If we can, we'll borrow another vehicle, otherwise, we'll continue on foot until we can find something else suitable for us."

Mikey blinked again, relieved at the idea of real rest at last but he didn't sit down. Instead, he turned his head to stare back towards the stream. It was still hot and he felt dirty and disgusting, having not had time to try to wash off.

Just then, Donnie came out again, looking far more cheerful than Mikey could remember seeing him since before he'd been... well, in a long time. "I looked through the back of the van while we were waiting for Mikey to wake up earlier and found snacks!" he exclaimed happily. "We have Mochi, Calbee Shrimp, Ponzu and Wasabeef potato chips and two packets of pocky, Almond Crush and Matcha."

"It's bad enough we took their van, I don't think we should be eating their snacks too," Leo spoke up, looking extremely uncomfortable at the idea.

Raph snorted derisively as he held a hand out to Donnie, "I'll take the Wasabeef!"

"Or we could all share," Donnie put in drily.

"Pft! Leo doesn't even want anything anyway, the rest of us can each have a bag of chips and then split the mochi and pocky."

"Or we could all share and save some for later," Donnie repeated obstinately. He looked to Mikey with a smile. "Which should we open first?"

Mikey blinked in confusion as he stared at the unfamiliar packets.

"Oh, right! Shrimp is self-explanatory but Wasabeef is wasabi and beef, and Ponzu is citrus seasoned soy sauce."

His eyes widened in delight. To think his brothers always ridiculed his sense of taste and flavour adventurism. If circumstances were different, he could have fit right in over here in Japan. His gaze lingered longingly on the Ponzu but knowing Raph wanted the other, he carefully lifted a paw and motioned to the Wasabeef before letting it drop heavily to the ground again with a thunk.

Donnie opened the pack, took out a handful to feed Mikey with and passed the packet around. Mikey cringed at the idea of being handfed and tried to get Donnie to just place it on the ground for him. After all, it wasn't as if he wasn't used to that already. Not all his food had been in a bowl and he'd often been forced to eat directly off the floor. Better that than being handfed at least.

"I am not putting it on the dirt for you," Donnie protested stiffly. "You don't know what germs you could pick up from that! For all we know, there could have been faeces there at some point, whether exhausted there or walked there by a bird or animal."

Mikey pulled a face. No worse than when they were in the sewers. That place was full of it and long before they'd learned to cultivate their own food they'd often scavenged food from there so what was the difference? Then he reeled, disturbed by the sudden memory.

Donnie sighed and jumped to his feet, going back into the van. A half a minute later, he came back with a sheet of paper which he placed on the ground to put chips for Mikey on, making him far happier for not being forced to eat out of his brother's hand again.

After the packet was finished, Donnie broke open the packet of Matcha Pocky and gave everyone one piece. Leo's eyes lit up in delight at the flavour. Mikey wasn't a fan but he was still hungry and since he'd had far worse since being captured, he ate it without complaint anyway.

Once they were done eating, Leo and Raph laid back to rest after Donnie offered to keep first watch. Mikey soon stood and walked to the edge of the small clearing, looking longingly in the direction of the stream once more.

"Mikey, what are you doing?" Donnie called softly, not wanting to disturb their resting brothers.

Mikey gave Donnie a pleading look and motioned toward the stream with one paw. Now the distraction of food was over, all he wanted was to get clean. He just wished he was capable of washing himself but without hands, it was next to impossible. All he could do would be to sit in the water and let it flow over him, hopefully washing some of the filth away.

"You want to go back to the stream?"

Mikey blinked desperately. 'Please!'

Donnie sighed. "I'm sorry, Mikey but you can't. We need to stay together."

'Please!' he begged again, wanting to cry since that was a surefire method to get his way but other than his earlier breakdowns, he hadn't done so in months and his pride wouldn't allow him to now, even if it was in the name of manipulation of his easiest to sway brother.

To his credit, Donnie looked pained but he stood his ground. "Maybe later just before we leave but right now, you can't."

Sighing miserably, there was just no way he could communicate his pure need to Donnie, he reluctantly sank to the ground, still facing the direction of the stream. If only he could talk, he would have the ability to make his brother understand and yet... he wasn't sure he would ever be able to bring himself to. Some things were just far better left unsaid. He laid his head down on one paw, ignoring the sound of someone, Donnie, getting to his feet and coming over to him.

"Is it really that important to you?" Donnie asked softly as he knelt beside Mikey.

Mikey turned his head to face Donnie and blinked quickly. 'Yes!'

Donnie regarded him for a moment, then turned and called, "Leo? Raph? Are you still awake?"

Leo sat up instantly alert and Raph grumbled unintelligibly.

"Wishing I wasn't."

Donnie smiled tightly. "Do you mind if we all go back to the stream? You can both sleep there."

Leo nodded thoughtfully, "Sure. It would probably be a good idea anyway. It's a hot day and it'll be much cooler by the water, not to mention we'll be by a water source we can drink from."

Donnie pulled a face. "Just because it looks clean and clear doesn't mean it's safe. No drinking from it until we can purify it."

Mikey gave Donnie a disbelieving look. He'd already drunk from it and the water was sweet and clean. Much nicer than anything he'd drunk from bowls or shared troughs filled with dog and horse saliva since he was captured.

"Do we have enough crystals?" Leo asked seriously.

Donnie nodded, "Enough for maybe two more refills each."

"That's not a lot," Leo pointed out dubiously. "We don't know how long it's going to take us to get to the harbour since we don't have reliable transport and have to constantly hide."

A chill raced down Mikey's shell. Harbour? Why were they heading for a harbour? He didn't want to go anywhere near one ever again. Not after last time!

"Well, unfortunately, it's going to have to do. We can't risk getting sick from the micro-organisms that live and breed in water. If we were at the mouth of the stream, that _might_ be another story," Donnie retorted irritably. "We can't even build a fire to boil the water since it might be seen and investigated, not that we even have anything to boil it in anyway."

"Blah, blah, blah," Raph rolled his eyes. "Let's just get to the stream to make Mikey happy so I can finally get some sleep. And by the way, when we got there the first time, Mikey had been drinking from it and he's fine now. Just like he was fine the previous couple of times we stopped to refill our bottles from streams."

Donnie twitched at the reminder. "Well, I somehow doubt the water he's been given all this time was the most sanitary," Mikey blinked in agreement, "therefore, his stomach is already used to it, provided it isn't too contaminated."

"You're overthinking this, Nerd-a-tello," Raph snorted, lumbering tiredly to his feet. "We've never had the most sanitary conditions in the first place. I mean, look at where we live! And we certainly haven't always had pure water. At least not until you tapped into the city's pipes!"

Mikey smiled slightly at the play on words. Almost worthy of himself once. Though he would have emphasised the pun to make sure everyone else noticed and had a good laugh or groan in the process.

His face fell again, tears threatening but he forcibly held them back. It was bad enough that he had worried his brothers for so long and continued to do so now but how was he ever supposed to play his part to keep them happy and amused now when he couldn't even talk anymore, let alone communicate beyond a few very simple blinks?

"Which was years ago!" Donnie snapped in exasperation. "Plenty of time to lose whatever resistance we had to the less harmful of bacteria. Even then, Master Splinter still always boiled everything before letting us drink it!"

"Could you two please calm down?" Leo asked, sounding as though he was barely preventing himself from snapping also. "You're upsetting Mikey," he said, motioning towards him.

Mikey's eyes shot wide and he rapidly blinked 'no.' It wasn't their fault, not this time at least, but he couldn't explain what actually upset him and if he could, then he wouldn't have had a reason to be upset in the first place. Well, he glanced down at his paws in frustration, scratch that, yes, he would but it wouldn't have been as bad.

Donnie and Raph both turned to face him, startled at the realisation, Donnie's gaze softening and Raph's becoming unreadable as he tried to swallow back his more volatile nature.

"I'm sorry, buddy, we didn't mean to upset you," Donnie said sorrowfully, coming closer and crouching down beside Mikey. "And don't worry, as for those, I'll get them off you the first chance I get, okay?"

Mikey stared up at Donnie, hope filling him for the first time in forever. If he could be free of the infernal paws, then at least he could write to them or type. Yeah, probably type. That might be easier on him considering there was a good chance he'd never be able to hold a pencil again.

Or a paintbrush...

Mikey swallowed and gave Donnie a tentative smile.

"As I said before though, it'll... uh... probably have to wait until we can get home, I'm afraid," Donnie continued softly. Mikey canted his head curiously – he vaguely remembered Donnie saying something to that effect before but it'd been much harder to understand back then; with exposure, his English had come back in leaps and bounds in the last day or two but prior to that, it had been almost non-existent thanks to Mai and her treatments. "If we find an opportunity to do it before we leave Japan, I'll do everything I can to take it then. Okay?"

'Okay,' Mikey blinked hopefully.

"Come on," Raph grunted gruffly as he began to stomp towards the stream, "Let's just get there already. You know how I get when I don't get enough sleep."

"What's the difference between then and any other time," Leo cracked with a small smile, glancing at Mikey as if to say, "Am I right?"

Mikey huffed a silent laugh that he didn't really feel, knowing he needed to give Leo something for his effort. He started trotting after Raph, intending to take the lead to show him the right way, since his brother was already veering off in the wrong direction again.

"Sh-shut up!" Raph retorted, thrown by his effort not to start another argument in front of Mikey.

A couple of minutes later they reached the water again and this time, Mikey didn't even hesitate, he walked straight into the middle of it, ignoring Leo's strangled cry of protest and sat down. The cool water came halfway up his plastron and he relished the feel of it running across his skin, the way it tickled his scales ever so slightly.

"Mikey, you need to come out. Those shackles could rust if you get them wet!"

"That's unlikely, Leo," Donnie observed calmly and Mikey turned his head to blink his agreement.

It was something he'd been terrified of early on, especially with freshly broken hands and burns. While he didn't understand how rust could make him sick, he knew it could, because Donnie had said so and he didn't want to get lockjaw and die. By the time he was brought to Japan, it was early Autumn, the weather was stinking hot and there had been a lot of rain. He'd been forced to train whether it was wet or dry and trudged through sticky mud on many occasions. The metal paws on his hands never once even tarnished and between the constant pain from the burns, broken bones and punishments and the never-ending exhaustion, he'd soon forgotten he'd ever even worried about rust, tetanus and lockjaw in the first place. Then he'd begun to forget about a lot of other things too but he didn't want to think about that...

"If they haven't rusted by now, I doubt they will simply because Mikey decided to take a dip in a stream now," Donnie continued, watching Mikey as he spoke. He gave a small, encouraging smile which Mikey tried to return before lifting a paw and clumsily trying to run it over his body as best he could to wash.

"If you say so, Donnie," Leo replied, not a trace of doubt in his voice.

"I do," Donnie replied firmly. "Now, get some sleep because I want some myself before we leave."

Leo chuckled and followed Raph's example by laying down under the dappled shade of a tree and resting his head on his arm like a pillow.

Donnie continued to watch Mikey for a while, his expression unreadable, before taking off his gear, except for his mask and wading out to join him.

"Would you like some help?" Donnie offered quietly.

The suggestion filled him with terror and Mikey's breathing quickened. Stumbling as he backed away, he couldn't blink fast enough, 'No!'

"Just your shell, I mean?" Donnie added quickly. "Even if you could use your hands, you wouldn't be able to reach that without a long-handled brush and you still have mud in the grooves from when we were trying to disguise our scents earlier. I'm sure the same can be said of the rest of us," he chuckled, trying to put Mikey at ease.

Still, Mikey hesitated. He didn't want help now or ever again, not after the forced weekly baths from Three-Five-Eight of all people but... he needed this and his brother was right. He had no chance of reaching without help.

"I'll be careful," Donnie promised softly, "and if you get too uncomfortable, you can always tell me to stop and I promise I will."

'Alright,' he blinked reluctantly after several minutes of thinking and trying to calm his racing heart and thoughts. Then, trying to suppress his shuddering, he turned to give his brother easier access to his shell.

Removing his mask, Donnie dipped it in the stream. Then he reached out and carefully touched Mikey's carapace, watching him for the slightest sign he should stop and though Mikey remained stiff and shaking slightly, he gave no sign, so Donnie began gently rubbing his mask along the edges of the scutes and along the grooves in the patterns, washing the remnants of mud and other things out. He frowned slightly as he worked. "It's obvious someone's been taking care of you, your scutes aren't as dirty as I would have thought after all this time," he observed quietly after a while. He grimaced as Mikey stiffened more. "Still, it's obvious they haven't been cleaned as thoroughly as they should have been. The good news, though, is that I can't see any sign of shell rot."

Of course not. Mai had treated that and anything else at the first signs. Then had gone on to berate Dogpound or Three-Five-Eight for not taking care of him properly. Mikey hadn't always heard those conversations, thanks to the white noise or even the drugs she often gave him but he could see her displeasure easily enough. Not to mention that Dogpound always took it out on him afterwards. Three-Five-Eight also made comment once or twice as he bathed him, taking extra care as he did, even forcing him to consume small amounts of Viagra a couple of times so he could clean down there when Mikey refused to expose himself during bathtime. Bradford, of course, thought such circumstances were a riot and encouraged it, convincing Mai to release the drug to Three-Five-Eight. Mikey soon learnt to just release his manhood from its confines so as to not be subjected to the torture of having the Viagra forced on him. That was, at least, when the choice was still his to make.

Trying to dislodge the disturbing memories, Mikey shook his head wildly. Donnie paused in his ministrations to softly ask if he was alright and all Mikey could do was turn his head and blink, 'yes' at him. His brother looked doubtful but Mikey turned away immediately, wishing that Donnie would just hurry up and get this over and done with. He clenched his hands inside their metal prisons, unable to help the wince as he felt the grating of badly healed bones. A shudder ran through him at the feeling and Donnie stopped what he was doing once more.

"Mikey..." Donnie ventured softly. Mikey turned his head back, not quite enough to actually look at his brother but enough to show he was paying attention. Donnie swallowed. "Did they... did they hurt you?"

Seriously? Now Mikey did meet Donnie's focused gaze in disbelief. And he was supposed to be a genius...?

Of course, they hurt him! As his Alpha kept saying to him, he wasn't there on vacation! He was hurt every day from day one when he was first chained, collared and branded and later repeatedly electrocuted by that stupid shock collar he was so glad to be finally rid of, beaten and humiliated almost daily and don't get him started on the day the paws were... secured to him.

Or when she took his voice from him...

Of course, they hurt him and the rage at the unfairness of it all he used to feel began to rise afresh. An anger he'd long forgotten about as he began to forget about everything else, choosing instead to just exist, to simply survive because it was so much easier on his sanity!

"I-I'm sorry, that was a stupidly phrased question, of course, they hurt you. I meant, did they... did someone..." Donnie swallowed again, unsure how to phrase his question and his gaze flickered over to the shore where their brothers lay, seemingly asleep. "I'm sorry, this … this probably isn't the best time to be asking these kinds of questions... especially since you can't... exactly answer me."

Suddenly horror filled Mikey, threatening to overwhelm him as he realised exactly what Donnie was trying to ask. Yes... 'No!' he insisted, even as he tried to stop himself from shaking all over again. He couldn't... he wouldn't! Even if he could talk, he was never talking about that! His eyes squeezed tightly closed as he forced himself to turn away, not wanting Donnie to see his face, his reaction.

The best part of forgetting was not having to remember what happened after his weekly baths and the best part of having been merely existing was the fact that they lost interest when he stopped reacting...

Usually, at least.

Then his brothers, his family had to turn up, rescue him and make him start remembering everything all over again.

Everything!

He never wanted to forget them or his life but it was so much easier. So much less painful to just forget!

He truly was happy they'd found a way to come after him despite everything and beyond grateful for the rescue but why did they have to keep reminding him like this?

Why did Donnie have to get it into his head to try to ask him that?

Some things were better off forgotten and he desperately wished he could just forget all over again!

"I think... it might be best if I stop for now. The mud is all out anyway," Donnie said softly, trying to hide the pain in his voice and not quite succeeding. "There's a couple of places that still need a really good scrub but... i-it can wait for another day." Donnie took a step to the side and dipped his bandanna into the water, agitating it vigorously before wringing it out.

"You... w-we should get out of the water now. I need to keep watch and you need to dry off and get some rest. We-we've got a long journey ahead of us still and at this point we don't know how long we will be in borrowed vehicles and how much we will need to travel on foot."

Mikey blinked once numbly, his thoughts and memories still reeling but Donnie didn't notice, already wading out of the stream, shell to him as he stared hollowly in another direction.

Biting his bottom lip, Mikey finally followed his brother out but upon reaching the shore, walked to the left, heading instead for the mostly smooth rocky ground near the water's edge. After testing the heat with the skin on his leg, he curled up on the rock under dappled sunlight, using his arm as a pillow and closed his eyes, aware of Donnie's gaze on him the entire time.

"Just... hang on, Mikey, I'll find a way to help you talk again soon. I just... need to work out what's wrong first..."

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to let me know what you think :-)
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.  
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.   
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Possible trigger warning applies for this chapter.   
> Gomen – sorry.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 14

Suddenly, the sound of quiet murmurs and furtive movements came out of nowhere and Mikey's eyes shot open frantically, his heart beating a staccato in his chest as he realised they were trying to take him unawares again. He worked desperately to control his ragged breathing in the vain hope they wouldn't notice he was awake and slowly, carefully, tried to shift to make out where the threat was. What caught his eye had him gaping in shock and then abject relief as he realised it was actually just his brothers trying to be quiet as they changed shifts

Leo cast him an apologetic look, "Oh, sorry, Mikey, we didn't mean to wake you," he said softly.

"Yeah," Raph muttered, "really not used to you being such a light sleeper. It's weird! I mean, you used to sleep straight through me playing the drums."

Mikey pulled a face. So not true! No one, not even the dead could sleep through all that banging and crashing but it was pointless to ever tell Raphael that unless you wanted to be punched in the face or something.

"So, uh... since you're awake anyway, I wanted to try something with you," Leo offered hesitantly.

Raph groaned and Leo tossed him a look.

"What? I didn't say anything!" Raph retorted defensively, glaring at Leo and making Mikey smile ever-so-slightly. The threat of violence from their fighting and arguing did make his heartrate pick up speed but on the other hand, the familiarity of it was almost welcome, especially considering what he'd woken up thinking.

"And yet you still think it's a stupid idea."

Raph shook his head adamantly, "I never said that! I said that doing it right now is stupid when you both clearly need to sleep. You've only had about three hours, Leo and Mikey's probably had less, even if you count when I had to knock him out earlier!"

Leo sighed despondently. "That's true but we're both wide awake now, right, Mikey?" Mikey blinked uncertainly, not quite sure what was going on and Leo continued, "And who knows when we'll get another opportunity like this one where it's peaceful and there's no one around to disturb us for miles."

"Uh... hello? Busy country road is only a couple hundred yards or so that-a-way," Raph retorted, motioning viciously in the general direction of.

"And our borrowed van is concealed from view. There's no reason for anyone to stop here," Leo calmly pointed out. "Look, just give us half an hour, then we'll try to go back to sleep and rest up for tonight. You can even time us if you like since you're awake."

Raph threw up his hands in defeat and stomped away to take his turn at watch as Leo smiled reassuringly at Mikey and came to sit down opposite him.

So he pushed himself upright, shifting into seiza but with his paws on the ground in front and canted his head curiously at Leo.

Leo sized him up for a moment, then, "When we first found you, it seemed like you didn't recognise us and had perhaps forgotten who you are." Mikey looked away in shame but Leo continued. "Since then, the longer we've back together, the more it has felt as though you've been remembering, the more you've been seeming like you again, albeit very hurt and scared. Would my impressions be somewhat right, Mikey?"

Still unable to meet his brother's gaze, Mikey none-the-less blinked once.

"That's good to know," Leo sighed in relief.

It was? Mikey looked up in surprise and blinked his confusion.

"I know it's going to take a while for you to get over this but I'm glad to know you're still with us and making the effort to come back," Leo explained with a gentle smile.

Mikey looked away again.

"So, the question is, how much do you remember?" Leo mused thoughtfully. "Don't worry, I know you can't answer that. It was rhetorical. Hmm... Do you remember everything yet, Mikey?"

More than he wanted to... he didn't answer.

"So some things are still a blank?"

Once again, Mikey didn't answer, even though it was true.

"Okay... well, do you remember a couple of days after you were captured how you met Master Splinter in the Astral Plane to tell us where you were?"

Mikey hesitated, thinking about it. To be honest, he vaguely remembered doing that but it had been so long since then and he was so desperate at the time that he was no longer sure if he had managed to do it after all or if he'd simply imagined succeeding at the time. He carefully lifted a single heavy paw and rocked it back and forth, 'Sort of.'

Leo looked disappointed for a moment but very quickly covered it up and uncomfortable, Mikey looked away again.

"Well, that's okay. What I'm trying to say is, you managed to do it back then. What I want now is for you to do it again. Only this time, meet _me_ in the Astral Plane."

Was he nuts? Mikey's jaw fell agape as he stared towards at his brother in disbelief. He'd always sucked at meditation and he hadn't tried it for so long because every time he did he was punished for not acting like the dog he was supposed to be. Even when he thought he was safely alone inside his kennel in the dead of night, he'd soon discovered otherwise, thanks to a camera in the upper corner of the room where he had no chance of reaching.

"I realise you're obviously out of practice and that you always had trouble focusing on meditation, among other things, but you were always a natural with the actual Astral Plane when you managed to get there," Leo continued gently, reaching out a finger and lifting Mikey's chin to try to meet his eyes, "so don't worry too much. I'll give you all the help I can, okay?"

'No,' Mikey blinked. He wasn't going to be able to do it, not in less than half an hour as Leo had promised Raph so what was the point in even trying?

"Mikey, why can't you speak?" Leo suddenly asked, making him sit up straighter in panic. "Is it psychological, because of your conditioning?" He waited for a moment, then, "Or is it something they physically did to you?"

Unable to help himself, Mikey blanched, telling Leo what he needed to know even without directly answering.

"Physical then. Well, in that case, if we meet in the Astral Plane you'll be able to talk. You'll be able to tell us what's wrong so Donnie can have a chance to try to fix it if it's possible and if it's not possible, then, well at least we'll know and you'll still be able to talk to us in there, tell us what you need to and what we need to know. Otherwise, unless we get lucky and are able to find the equipment Donnie needs to remove those shackles from your hands, you'll have to wait until we get home and that'll take at least a month."

Mikey pulled back, looking away miserably again and wishing Leo couldn't see his vulnerability.

"For the record, Mikey, making it into the Astral Plane right now is unlikely, I know that, but the sooner we start working on it, even just a short session whenever we can get it, the sooner we'll succeed." Then Leo hesitated as if afraid, "Or... don't you want to talk to us again, little brother?"

More than anything... but even if he succeeded, what was to say he even remembered how to talk after so long of being unable?

Or that they'd see him the same way again?

Or worse, that he did succeed and was able to talk in the Astral Plane but that wasn't enough. He wasn't sure he could go from there back to his enforced silence in the real world. It would be like tasting a single lick of ice-cream and then having the bowl taken away, only far, far worse. After all, they couldn't all live their entire lives in the Astral Plane.

Then... then there was the problem that Mikey understood perhaps better than his brothers did. The Astral Plane reflected the mind and souls of those within it. Yes, the stronger the mind, the stronger the influence but everyone still helped shape it in some way or another. What if... in doing so, Mikey accidentally let slip something he really didn't want to, whether he was aware of doing so or not?

Mikey may have been a natural in the Astral Plane as Leo said but that didn't mean he was the most skilled. He simply didn't have enough experience for that, unlike Leo, who Master Splinter always favoured. Leo would see right through him. Would see his nightmares. Would see the reality of his life over the last ten months or so. He shuddered miserably at the thought. He couldn't... he wouldn't do it.

He blinked 'no' again, his heart filled with self-hatred at the terribly hurt expression he put on Leo's face, then turned around and curled up again to go back to sleep.

"Alright, little brother, I won't force you," Leo said with deep disappointment, "but I will bring this up again when you've had a bit more time to think about it."

Then Mikey heard Leo shift as he too laid down. He cracked his eyelids open a smidge to see his brother only a couple of yards from him, watching him and the guilt rose within like bile.

'Gomen, Leo,' he thought sorrowfully, deliberately putting actual words to his thoughts for the first time in a long time with some difficulty. Leo, of all turtles, didn't deserve it when he was only trying to help.

But Mikey didn't have a choice.

It was for his own sanity.

-:-

Mikey stood trembling with exertion and a growing trepidation as he stared at the docks below. As usual, he was propped upright by his two eldest brothers, his arms slung around their shoulders. Over ten months of being forced to remain on all fours meant the last few days of being on the run had taken their toll on him, leaving his legs shaky and aching badly. Though he'd become really fast on all fours in that time, it wasn't fast enough for them so they'd insisted on continuing to help him every time they were on foot.

Since leaving the stream, they'd spent the last three days borrowing unattended vehicles or walking and running with Leo setting a gruelling pace, only slowing when Donnie insisted on it, for Mikey's sake. Smaller cars were no good, leaving them with little room to move given their shells and making it far more likely to be seen by other travellers through the windows, as were vehicles with little to no window tinting. Vans were better since the only risk to being seen came from whoever was driving, usually Leo, but they couldn't always find a van so they were often left with little choice but to travel on foot. They always tried to abandon their borrowed transports in tourist area parking lots where possible, using the cover of darkness to escape the vehicle when there were still people around.

Now, they'd abandoned their latest vehicle in a parking lot a couple of blocks away and hoofed it to the docks from there, Donnie working worriedly at his T-phone as they moved.

"How long before the ship leaves, Don?" Leo asked softly as the brothers stared towards the massive cargo freighter before them.

"Almost six hours," Donnie replied distantly. "High tide is just after dawn and it's scheduled to leave an hour prior, giving them time to play with should anything go amiss."

Raph grunted, shifting Mikey's arm to a better position, Mikey just wished they'd put him down for a few minutes; he hurt. "There's a hell of a lot of light down there."

Leo nodded. "While we can probably take one light out without seeming suspicious, we won't be able to take out more. We'll have to be careful. Do you know where we're heading yet, Donnie?"

"Still working on it, Leo. We need a container we'll be able to get out of again if we want to survive the journey."

Mikey whipped his head towards Donnie in raw terror. 'No!' he blinked hysterically. Nonononono! Not again, he couldn't travel in one of those again! He tried desperately to pull away from his brothers, hoping they'd look at him and just understand because obviously, he couldn't tell them just how much he didn't want to do this, how much he couldn't.

Leo frowned slightly as he turned his head to face him, "I'm sorry, Mikey, I understand how you feel after last time..."

_No, he didn't and couldn't!_

"... but it's the only way to get home."

Mikey lifted both arms out as best he could, trying to mimic flying like a child pretending to be an aeroplane but though he'd become somewhat used to the weight of his paws and could walk on all fours easily enough, lifting them out and holding them up was another story; another thing that he'd be sent to Mai for trying to do when caught on camera when he'd thought he was alone back in his kennel. He gasped as the strain was too much and his arms flopped uselessly, the metal weights slamming into Leo and Raph's upper plastrons with dull thunks.

Raph glared but didn't say anything, Leo on the other hand, "Oh, a plane?" he questioned after a moment of trying to work out what Mikey meant.

'Yes!' Mikey blinked frantically. At least it would be faster!

Reaching up, Raph flicked Mikey softly between the eyes, his way of saying, 'think, for once'. "We can't catch a plane, doofus."

Why not? Mikey keened silently, staring at Leo pleadingly. He couldn't go on a ship again, not if it meant travelling trapped in a metal sweatbox for weeks! He wouldn't even last a day!

"It's far too dangerous, Mikey," Leo explained softly. "We'd be lucky if we could even breathe since they don't always pressurise the baggage compartments unless they have good reason and besides that, it would be dangerously cold for us. Even if we managed to survive the journey, we'd end up caught at the other end and that's assuming we could make it past the security and sniffer dogs in the first place. No, our only option is by cargo ship."

Then he'd rather stay here in Japan! Mikey was about to try to pull his arms away from his brothers to sit down in a huff to show his feelings on the matter when a familiar scent hit his nostrils. His heart began to pound wildly and he looked up in panic in the direction the breeze blew from. Mikey couldn't see anything but he knew, he _knew_ they were there!

Leo sighed helplessly and continued speaking, "I know you're scared, Mikey but I'm sorry, we really don't have any other choice!"

'No! Not that!' Mikey blinked rapidly, still staring where the scent wafted from. It was gone now but still strong in his memory and he _knew_ he hadn't imagined it. No matter how much they haunted his nightmares, both sleeping and waking. He shuddered, his breath becoming ragged as his terror built.

Donnie looked up from his T-phone in concerned curiosity.

"Please don't try to argue, if you..." Shocked, Leo found himself cut off as Mikey bared his teeth, blowing air through his mouth in his best impression of a growl. Then Mikey turned his gaze toward Donnie, meeting his eyes momentarily before lowering them to stare pointedly at his feet.

"Why are you staring at Donnie's feet?" Raph asked in confusion.

Perplexed, Leo and Donnie also followed Mikey's gaze and frustrated, Mikey sighed and then, despite the jelly feeling of his legs, lifted one, waving his foot wildly in the air.

"Oh, Foot!" Donnie finally exclaimed.

'Yes!' Mikey blinked, allowing his foot to fall back to the ground and slumping, pulling at Leo and Raph with his sudden dead weight.

"He means the Foot," Donnie explained, turning to look at their brothers. “They must be in the vicinity.”

"Thank you, genius, we never would have known without your further explanation," Raph said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

Donnie frowned but otherwise ignored Raph before wordlessly taking Leo's place in propping Mikey up.

"Get under cover," Leo commanded softly. "I'm going to go check it out."

Wait, what? Didn't they believe him? Hurt, Mikey stared after Leo as he ran off away from them. They should all be leaving together, not splitting up so someone could check out his story! Yes, he was scared and didn't want to go aboard the ship but he wouldn't make something like this up and they should know that by now!

"Come on Mikey," Donnie murmured as he and Raph began leading Mikey to a nearby shadowy building. Mikey tried to keep up but twisted his head anxiously to watch Leo disappear into the shadows.

Why couldn't they ever listen to him? Even when he still had the ability to speak, they never listened! Never just trusted him and because of that Leo was now heading into danger and threatening to expose them all.

"Mikey, we're trying to help you, not carry you. Stop trying to watch Leo," Raph admonished sharply. Then more gently he added, "He'll be fine. Okay?"

Would he? Mikey desperately wanted to have faith in his brother, knew he would have in the past but now he couldn't shake the fear, especially after scenting _him_ nearby. Why couldn't they just trust him and all leave together like they should have? Hell, they shouldn't have even come here in the first place!  
  
Reluctantly, he faced forward, it wasn't like he could see Leo anymore anyway, and saw a large, dark building looming ahead. His brothers suddenly veered to the left away from the main gate and led him to a trio of large dumpsters which they hunkered behind.

Raph and Donnie removed his arms from around their necks and Mikey breathed in relief, letting them flop with a metallic thunk to the bitumen and earning him a glare and the shh gesture from Raph.

"Sore?" Donnie murmured softly and Mikey turned to him and blinked once. Donnie reached up and gently began massaging Mikey's nearest arm, causing him to almost melt into his brother at the relief. "I'm sorry, buddy, I know this has to be hard on you but it's important to be able to move fast."

Mikey blinked once again, understanding, even as he tried to peer past the dumpster, looking anxiously for any sign of Leo.

"Keep down, Mikey," Raph breathed, also keeping watch.

Mikey glowered for a moment, then slumped back miserably and Donnie silently shifted around to his other side to massage his other arm.

"So how did you know the Foot are around?" Donnie asked quietly. Mikey looked up questioningly. "Did you see them?"

'No.'

"Hear them?"

'No.'

Donnie looked perplexed so Mikey mimed sniffing.

"You smelt them?" Raph asked too loudly in disbelief, prompting Donnie to frown at him.

"Keep it down!" Donnie breathed even as Mikey blinked.

'Yes.'

"Seriously?" Raph groaned in disbelief, "Leo's out there wasting time we could be using to find a way onto that damn ship all because you claim you smelt the Foot?"

Mikey huffed indignantly. 'Yes,' he blinked again, frustrated once again that he couldn't give more than yes or no answers.

"It makes sense, Raph," Donnie spoke up in a low voice, coming to Mikey's defence. "Think about it. We already know Mikey was trained to follow a trail by sense of smell, we saw evidence of that back at the stream a few days ago and he's been out of the sewers for a long time now. Meaning he's had a chance to adjust and get used to his full olfactory senses."

'Yes,' Mikey agreed, clenching his fingers inside the paws as he pushed himself up to try to look for Leo once more. Raph simply pushed him down again.

"I get that but you're asking us to believe there are Foot around because he _scented_ them on the air. That's different to following a trail."

'No,' Mikey blinked miserably. It really wasn't. He'd long since had a chance to become intimate with certain scents, especially those of the ones who 'took care' of him for so long, spending time inside his kennel whether just for feeding or fetching him for training or punishment or for... He closed his eyes tightly at the thought, trying desperately to shunt the dreadful memory from his mind. Suddenly, he felt an arm snake around his shoulders, drawing him close and Mikey freaked, ripping himself away. He scooted back frantically, staring at Donnie with terrified eyes.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, buddy, it's only me. I didn't mean to scare you," Donnie apologised profusely, thankfully keeping his distance to give Mikey a chance to breathe. "You just looked like... like you needed reassur... a-a hug. I'm sorry, Mikey."

He did. He really did but not like that! Not out of nowhere with _him_ fresh in his mind. Trembling, Mikey hunched in on himself, eyes flickering around nervously and wishing Leo would hurry the hell back and they could just leave already. Being here was bad. Really, really bad.

Raph stared at Donnie, silently asking, 'What the hell?' and Donnie shrugged slightly but not slightly enough that Mikey missed it. Mikey immediately pushed himself up again in the hopes of stopping his brothers from worrying so much and went back to watching for Leo, bouncing lightly on the spot in an attempt to cover up his uncontrollable trembling.

"You know how Leo is, we won't see him until he's ready to be seen," Raph finally muttered once over his shock, "so stay out of sight, Mikey."

Mikey bit his lip. Raph was right. Leo was like that, he remembered, but it wasn't just Leo he was watching for. Where there was one of them, there were sure to be several more and he felt sick at the thought of being discovered and dragged back to the Foot now. They were in the shadows but he still felt completely exposed and the fact he couldn't run, not properly at least, really didn't help. He hunkered back down out of sight and stared pleadingly to Raph and then Donnie; he just wanted to go, to get away from here before it was too late. Before they were discovered. _Please!_

"Relax, we're out of sight here. No one will see us," Raph promised quietly.

But they didn't _have_ to see them! Didn't Raph get that? If the Foot brought dogs they'd be noticed in no time. If Mikey could smell one of them then it would be even easier for them to smell him! They _had_ his _scent_!

Donnie moved closer and reached out again but not yet touching, "Mikey?" he called softly and when Mikey looked up to him, finally rested his hand on his shoulder. "Calm down, okay? We're not going to let them take you again."

Mikey stared at him helplessly. He wanted desperately to believe his brother but he couldn't, yet he blinked once to acknowledge him.

Donnie smiled tentatively and shifted closer. "Can I?" he asked softly and Mikey blinked again, this time leaning into his brother of his own accord. Slowly, his racing heartbeat began to subside, his breathing becoming quieter and more controlled as he began to feel a little calmer in his brother's comforting embrace. None of his family had ever been too touchy-feely but Donnie had always been the first to notice whenever he really needed it. At least, he had been until they first went topside and met... Mikey blinked, trying to remember... April. That's right, April. He still couldn't picture her face yet but he remembered her name now. She was their first and only human friend. They'd met a few others since, her father, Karai and... he scrunched up his face as he pushed himself to remember... The Pulveriser... but April was the only one who had become a true friend. Her father was too scared of everything to come visit after what he'd been through - something Mikey could totally understand now - they'd betrayed Karai's tentative trust and ruined any possibility of actual friendship by attacking her psychotic father – Mikey clenched his eyes shut, trying desperately not to think of the terrifying Foot leader who'd sentenced him to life as a Foot dog - and earning her ire and as for The Pulveriser, well... despite the human's well-meaning intentions, they'd used him and he'd been badly mutated to the point he wasn't even functional anymore and had to be held together in a giant jar in a corner of Donnie's lab; Mikey often used to wonder how his family felt with him missing.

Suddenly, he felt the tiniest of breezes from behind and Mikey pulled away, whipping around to see Leo looking startled at being so easily noticed.

"Oh, you're back," Donnie exclaimed quietly when he turned to see what had disturbed Mikey when he'd only just managed to calm him down again. "So... did you find anything?"

Leo nodded curtly. "Mikey was right. I spotted at least four Foot, one of who was searching and working their way inwards in a circular pattern, suggesting there may be more of them around. There was also someone talking to the harbour master who wore no uniform but had the bearing of a trained ninja." He glanced around, taking in their surroundings. "I'm not certain it's safe to move. We should hole up somewhere until it's safe."

Raph frowned, displeased at the idea. "Not like you to want to hide."

"I don't think we have much choice. We can hardly be stealthy while trying to protect Mikey when he can't even walk on his own and I don't know if you've noticed but the Foot in Japan are far more skilled than the ones back in New York. That means it's extremely likely there are far more of them around than I noticed."

They wanted him back badly, Mikey realised with a thrill of terror. Badly enough to go out of their way to stake out wherever they might try to flee the country from. They couldn't escape through this port and he'd bet all the other ports and maybe airports would similarly be staked out too. Trembling, he leaned closer into Donnie again, trying not to let his fear overwhelm him.

"Come on, while there's no one close by," Leo commanded softly. Wordlessly, Leo and Raph took Mikey's arms, slinging them around their shoulders and pulling him to his feet again. "Sorry, we'll find somewhere to rest soon, I know you're tired."

'No,' Mikey blinked. He didn't want to rest anymore, he just wanted to get as far away as possible. Unfortunately, none of his brothers noticed his protest and instead began hauling him towards the shadowy building, hugging it as they skirted through the shadows, all the while keeping an eye out for danger.

It came just a few minutes later and Mikey noticed it half a second before Leo stiffened, turning his head to stare towards a hulking figure in the distance who vanished a moment later.

"Find us a way in, Don," Leo muttered as he began leading Mikey and Raph deeper into the shadows. "We have to get out of the open, asap."

Donnie nodded and peeled off from the group, silently running ahead with Mikey staring anxiously after him. Several long minutes later, he returned, "This way," he breathed softly, leading them towards a side entrance he'd already unlocked in anticipation.

Leo cast Donnie a questioning look and Donnie flashed a quick gap-toothed grin back. "Already hacked the alarms and cameras for this entrance. I'll reactivate them once we're safely inside."

"Good job," Leo praised. He and Raph turned side-on, leading Mikey inside and Donnie quickly sealed the door behind them.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed. 
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also, see other warnings.  
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.  
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not, however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination.
> 
> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 15

Low-level lighting filled the room and there were lockers, tables and chairs everywhere, along with several vending machines filled cold drinks, hot drinks, snacks and hot meals. A break room and employee storage room, Mikey realised, gazing towards the vending machines longingly.

"Hungry?" Leo asked quietly, studying Mikey for a moment.

'No,' he lied with a shudder. He didn't feel safe here. They had only the one door between them and the Foot. Not much to stop them if they too decided to hack security and search inside.

Leo gave a nod of understanding, even as Raph frowned, obviously realising Mikey's lie. "We'll make our way further inside, look for somewhere safe and defensible to hide in. Preferably somewhere no one is likely to go even during the day since we probably won't be able to leave tonight."

"Just because of a few Foot that we can easily take?" Raph asked derisively.

"It's not about if we can take them or not," Leo replied defensively as he led his brothers to a door leading deeper into the building. "I would rather avoid any contact completely. They don't know we're here right now but if we engage for any reason, even if they don't see us, they will know they are on the right track and bring in reinforcements. Besides, as I said before, it's likely there are more Foot around than I noticed. I didn't exactly search everywhere."

"Why not?" Raph asked in a combination of curiosity and accusation.

"Lack of time," Leo shrugged, reaching out and turning the handle. He frowned at the sight of the too narrow corridor. "We can't walk three abreast. Mikey, will you be okay on your own?"

Mikey blinked once and Leo and Raph gently lowered him to the ground.

"Besides," Leo continued as he went ahead of his brothers, "I only went to confirm what Mikey told us and it was simply too dangerous to remain so exposed under the circumstances. I had to get back to you guys before I was cut off. They're a lot more observant than the Foot back home ever have been."

"Even more than the Footbots?" Donnie asked curiously as he looked up from the T-phone he was fiddling with.

"Definitely," Leo confirmed solemnly.

Mikey frowned, canting his head curiously as he followed Leo on all fours. Footbots? Who were they?

"Those things might adapt quickly and have really good sensors but they can't replicate intuition or recognise what doesn't belong since they don't actually think for themselves."

Donnie nodded in agreement. "That's certainly true. However, between their programming and their processors, they are easily able to adapt and react to our moves and skills, not unlike the Cymechs on 'Space Heroes'."

Cymechs? Mikey frowned but after a moment he cringed as he remembered and looked around warily. Despite the overall cheesiness of 'Space Heroes', the Cymechs were terrifying and utterly relentless and his brothers were comparing them to these Footbots? No wonder they took so long to come rescue him if they needed to deal with those.

The group soon came to another door with a window embedded high within it which Leo peered cautiously through. "It's a factory of some sort," he observed, reaching to push it open. The door wouldn't budge.

"You need a passkey," Donnie pointed out quietly as he stepped carefully past Mikey. He pulled a ribbon-like device from his bag and attached it to his T-phone and the electronic box on the door. A few seconds passed as Donnie activated a program on his phone and watched.

Suddenly, Mikey heard a click and the door popped open. Leo stepped forward, easing it open and peering through. Moments later, he opened it wide and ushered everyone through.

Mikey found himself on a metal gantry, the pattern of the floor digging painfully into his knees, however, he ignored it as he walked to the edge and gazed down curiously. The room was filled with numerous huge machines of which he had no idea the function of, large metal vats and conveyor belts everywhere. There was a sharp, acrid smell in the air that burnt painfully at his nostrils and made him feel slightly faint. He frowned, he didn't like it here but at least it was better than outside where the Foot were. Right?

"Okay, Donnie, I need you to hack into the security system to make sure there is no trace of our presence and if you can also use it to monitor for the Foot, that would be good."

Donnie nodded, glancing over to the computer room across the factory.

"Raph, you and I need to search for somewhere we can safely hole up in. I'll search to the right, you go left and we'll meet back up over there when we are done," Leo continued, motioning to the computer banks overlooking the factory below.

Raph didn't look too thrilled but agreed anyway.

Then Leo turned to Mikey, crouching down in front of him. "And Mikey..."

Mikey sighed and hung his head, looking away. Stay close to Donnie no matter what. He knew already. God, he hated being so helpless and pathetic. Although, he thought darkly, his brothers probably always thought he was considering how they always used to treat him.

"...I know you can't fight right now but I need you to watch Donnie's shell, just in case."

Mikey's eyes widened and he looked up at Leo in shock to see a serious look on his brother's face. He actually... meant it?

"We've all noticed how good you've become at keeping watch and I need you to use those skills to keep Donnie safe while he works. If you see, hear or smell anything, even if it's just us, let him know. Can I count on you to do that?"

'Yes!' Mikey blinked emphatically, smiling slightly with the thrill of actually being trusted at last and given something important to do.

Leo breathed a sigh of relief and smiled softly back at him, "Thanks, Mikey." He stood and looked around. "Alright everyone, get to it and be careful." Then he was gone.

Head canted slightly, Mikey looked up at Donnie as his brother straightened.

"Right!" Donnie breathed. "Let's go. Are you... alright getting over there without help? Because if not, I can help you but... it won't be as easy as with two."

'Yes,' Mikey blinked again, beginning to make his way along the gantry. Sure, the floor of the metal walkway was a bit uncomfortable but it was nothing. He'd had far worse time and time again every day since he was captured and besides, he wasn't sure how much more he could take of being helped to run on two feet right now. After days of it, his feet and legs ached like crazy, even if some of that time had been spent in vehicles.

Donnie stared after him worriedly before following, "Alright. Well, uh... just let me know if you do need help."

And how was he supposed to do that? Their blinking code wasn't that detailed and he couldn't even play charades well without the use of his hands. Well, it didn't matter anyway, he decided, since he could easily cope with this much.

Nearly ten minutes passed before they reached their destination and Donnie sat down at the central computer.

Mikey watched for a moment before trotting over to the door and sitting at attention, gazing out and in every direction as he listened to Donnie tapping away at the keyboard in front of him.

For a moment, he couldn't help but look down at his paws in frustration. If only he could get those off, then at least he'd be able to communicate again. Sure, writing or texting wasn't the same as talking, something he'd never do again, but it was something! It was better than nothing! He felt utterly helpless and all he wanted was to scream his rage and frustration but whatever Mai did to his voice stopped him from even doing that! Instead, Mikey clenched his folded, cramped fingers as best he could. God, it had been so hard, especially in those earlier months to be soundless. Things became easier since forgetting his life and how things used to be but now, now that he was with his family again and remembering things, having no voice, no way to talk was so much worse than ever before and that was something he'd never have thought possible.

If only he could trust himself to accept Leo's offer of trying the Astral Plain but that would lead to...

"Mikey…" Donnie said softly, giving him warning before placing a hand on his shoulder. Mikey looked up, surprised to realise he had trouble seeing clearly and hurriedly blinked away the budding tears. "It's okay. It's going to be okay. I promise."

Was it? How could he always just make promises like that? Donnie had always done that. Making promises without thinking things through first and yes, he did always come through eventually but it often took months to see through. Just look at how he'd promised April they'd rescue her father for example. It took the better part of a year and two attempts before they finally succeeded and even then things definitely hadn't been okay with him afterwards. Then there was Donnie's promise to cure The Pulveriser... Mikey had no idea what Donnie had done about the former human in the time since he'd been captured by Dogpound but last he knew, once again, it had been months with no success. Mikey shuddered horribly at the thought of having to live like this for months or even years more before Donnie could help him. Donnie meant well but he really didn't need any false promises right now.

Donnie crouched beside him and took up one paw, looking at it sorrowfully. "I promise, I'll get these off as soon as I can. We just need... I just need the right equipment. Once I'm done with what I'm working on right now, I'll see if there's anything that can help in the factory. Okay?"

Hanging his head, Mikey blinked once regardless of whether he felt it was okay or not.

"If they don't have the necessary equipment here, then I'll get them off at the first place we find that does have it and if worst comes to worst, well, I can definitely get them off you when we reach home."

Mikey slouched miserably. Yeah and that would be weeks away but... that... that was at least better than months, he supposed. He pulled his paw out of Donnie's grasp and motioned back to the computers with his head.

Donnie started and blinked in surprise, then realised. "Uh, right... Yes, I should... get back to work. Will you be alright?"

'Yes,' Mikey replied, refusing to look directly at Donnie. He couldn't. Instead, he gazed back out at the factory floor in front of him, showing how he was taking his assignment to watch Donnie's shell seriously and hoping Donnie would realise he didn't want to 'talk' about that any more. To his relief, his brother stood and walked back to the computers, though by the lack of immediate typing, Mikey guessed that Donnie was still staring at him instead.

Finally, the typing started up again and Mikey breathed in relief, then continued watching and listening for anything that didn't belong.

-:-

"Hey, you doing okay?" Raph grunted as he walked up to Mikey sometime later. Mikey gave a small smile and blinked once as he shifted aside for Raph to pass.

Raph looked at him askance for a moment before walking up to Donnie. "How'd you go? We off the books yet?"

Donnie sighed. "Well, there's good news and bad news in regards to that."

"Do tell," Raph pressed wryly, "but make sure it's in English for once."

Mikey turned his head in time to see Donnie give Raph a dirty look. He smiled slightly again, this time in amusement at the familiarity.

"Well, the good news is I have scoured the security footage of our presence," Donnie explained in a condescending tone. "The bad news is, I have no need to do that for anywhere else in this facility besides when Mikey and I crossed the factory floor as there are only cameras at the main entrance, the one at the break room and on the main factory floor. The rest of the facility has no cameras, meaning I can't set up a watch through the security system for any unwanted company."

A chill raced down Mikey's spine at the news.

"That's... not good..." Raph finally agreed, closing his eyes momentarily in resignation.

"No, it's not," Donnie replied darkly. "How about you, did you find anywhere suitable for us to hide?"

Raph pulled a face. "Maybe... It's not as good as I'd like but if worst comes to worst, it'll have to do. Guess we'll just have to wait and see if Leo found somewhere better."

Looking concerned, Donnie nodded. "Meanwhile, I've set up a feed loop so we can cross the floor for tonight. I've programmed it to run until staff begin entering the facility but it will also send an alert to my T-phone and give us a minute's warning to make sure we're clear."

"Sounds good," Raph grunted, staring back at the corridor they'd come in from. "Hey, that door still unlocked?"

"No," Donnie shook his head. "It locks automatically the moment it closes. Why?"

"Think we could all do with some food."

"I agree but we should wait for Leo to return first. In the meantime, I want to check out some of the equipment over there."

"Whatever for?" Raph snorted.

"It looks like cutting equipment. I want to check on the kinds of settings it has and if there is any way to scan and set cutting depth."

Raph raised an eyebrow ridge questioningly.

"I need to get those shackles and that collar off Mikey if I can," Donnie explained, obviously uncomfortable with calling them what they were - paws.

Mikey perked up, startled and hopeful as he stared at Donnie; he'd really meant it?

"However, it depends on the quality of the equipment and I can't tell that without taking a closer look."

"Then what are you waiting for?" Raph retorted. "The sooner those damn things are off him, the better for all of us!"

"Agreed but..." Donnie hesitated, unsure, "you know he's still going to have trouble walking and running on his own for a while, right?"

Raph just looked at Donnie in disbelief and Mikey turned his head away again, embarrassed. He knew that well enough for himself, especially after the last few days. After being kept down on all fours for so long, his legs ached really badly whenever they helped him stand or walk and he couldn't even keep up properly. All he ever did was continuously slow them down

"Yeah, I get that but at least he can start relearning and he'll be able to at least write or type what he needs to say instead of us having to play twenty questions. Man!" Raph growled menacingly, "if Master Splinter hadn't killed Dogpound already, I'd happily return the favour for what that arsehole did to Mikey!"

Mikey's cheeks heated up and he hurriedly stepped out of the room. Why did they have to talk about him like he wasn't even there? He couldn't talk but he wasn't deaf and... and... he wasn't sure he'd even be able to write with the paws off anyway... Mikey swallowed uncomfortably and head still down, began heading towards the machinery Donnie had indicated a couple of minutes prior.

Suddenly, Mikey became aware of a couple of sets of footsteps pounding after him on the gantry and turned, wide-eyed, to see his brothers.

"Do-don't just wander off like that, Mikey," Donnie gasped. "You worried us when we saw you weren't there!"

Mikey sighed. Wasn't his fault they started acting like he wasn't even there. Again.

"We already had this talk a few times now! I thought you finally learnt after that damn stream!" Raph growled half-menacingly.

'Yes,' Mikey blinked, doing his best to ignore his brother's tone. Then motioned his head to his destination before turning and making his way toward it once more.

"Alright," Donnie half sighed, half laughed, "we get it. Let's go see if it'll be any use," He jogged past Mikey to reach the equipment bank where he immediately started studying it intently.

For a time, Donnie worked in mostly silence while Raph stood watching from behind and offering the occasional unwanted suggestion, so Mikey turned to continue with the task Leo set for him earlier - that of watching Donnie's shell.

Finally, Leo returned, heading for the computer room. Halfway there, he stopped, head turning to look their way, obviously unimpressed to see them all out in the open instead of in the computer room. Mikey gave Leo a half-smile and shrug and walked over to Raph to tap at his leg.

Raph looked down at him, eyebrow ridges raised, "What's up, Mikey?"

Mikey turned his head to stare towards Leo.

"Oh, he's back. Thanks," Raph said, automatically leaving to go meet their brother and Mikey sighed in relief, glad that they were all back together again, even as he heard the familiar sounds of argument beginning as Leo questioned why they weren't in the agreed-upon meeting place.

It wasn't long before the pair were back beside him and Donnie and Mikey settled down, intensely tired. While they rested whenever they could, Mikey had barely slept since being rescued, considering how he was always instantly wide awake at the slightest noise from his brothers or nearby strangers. Even now, he couldn't actually sleep, given that his brothers were talking, Leo asking Donnie all sorts of questions and Donnie sounding quite excited but their voices soon faded into the distance, becoming comforting, soothing even as Mikey half listened, half napped.

Suddenly, the desire to relieve himself made itself known over the top of his tiredness and he pushed himself up to all fours as if in a dream and began walking, blinking his need to Leo as he did. Quickly finding a hidden corner where it hopefully wouldn't be noticed by the workers come the day, he prepared to go when a familiar, foreboding clicking noise caught his attention.

Feeling cold all over and all tiredness forgotten, his eyes immediately snapped wide open and he slowly turned his head in horror, quailing at the sight that met his eyes.

His Alpha.

Leash in hand and attached to the back of his collar - the click he'd heard - and grinning maliciously down at him. He lifted one huge finger in a gesture of silence even as Mikey opened his mouth to scream but as always, no sound passed his lips and he felt faint from sheer terror.

Suddenly, Mikey noticed the clicker in Dogpound's overly large paw and realised he'd never actually needed to go, it was simply the conditioning he'd been put through when Dogpound had used the clicker to command him to do so from a distance. He must have subconsciously heard the command and never even realised it.

[Stupid mongrel! You really thought you could escape me?] Dogpound growled softly as Mikey cowered fearfully to the ground. [Well, you can't and now, thanks to your idiocy and selfishness, the other freaks will all die!]

"Mikey?" Leo called softly and Mikey's eyes flickered briefly in his brother's direction before snapping terrified back to the ground at his Alpha's feet when the monster pulled painfully on the collar. "You okay, little brother? You're taking too long!"

Dogpound crouched down beside him, grabbing his head painfully and holding it as he secured the shock collar back in place one-handed. [How dare you respond to that name! You always were a slow learner, Spot!] he growled menacingly in his ever gravelly voice. [I saw you left some things behind when you ran away so trust me, I'll make sure you are punished appropriately once we're safely on our way.]

Nononononono! Mikey wailed internally. Ohgodohgodohgod! No! He couldn't go back to living like this! Not now! Not now that he'd tasted hope and freedom again and felt almost safe-ish with his brothers. Tears of terror filled his eyes as Dogpound stood, yanking upwards on the collar and pulling a choking Mikey to his hands and knees once more.

Dogpound stepped out from hiding, pulling Mikey with him and Mikey stared in shame at the feet of his flabbergasted brothers.

Suddenly, three sets of weapons were drawn and pointed threateningly at Dogpound.

"Get away from our brother!"

"Brother?" Bradford guffawed loudly. "This mongrel isn't your brother, not anymore. Spot is Foot property! I even have proof of ownership." Dogpound grinned cruelly as he reached down, grasping at the raggedy red bandanna still adorning Mikey's upper left arm and ripping it away. Mikey gasped in pain as the monster's claws bit viciously into his flesh, exposing the Foot clan symbol branded cruelly into his green skin.

"We'll kill you for that!" Raph snarled furiously, rushing forward. He stopped dead a step later as Bradford laughed, twisting the chain and making Mikey see stars as the air was cut off from his windpipe.

"Like your former rat owner?" Dogpound mocked with a sneer.

Chichi? Mikey whimpered silently as he wheezed desperately for breath. What... what happened to him? Where was he? What had his Alpha done to his father?

"What have you done with Master Splinter?" Leo demanded angrily, echoing Mikey's desperate thought as he settled into an attack stance.

"Oh, that rat's long dead now."

 _No!_ Fighting against the tight hold of the twisted collar, Mikey tried to look up at Dogpound in horror, only to gasp in pain again as the chain suddenly twisted further. Unable to help himself, he slumped weakly in place, only even still on all fours rather than on his face because Dogpound held him up.

"Its body's at the bottom of a cliff near where you abandoned it," Bradford laughed spitefully.

"You're lying!" Raphael spat furiously.

"Am I?" Bradford reached into the pocket of his pants and pulled something out, throwing it like a Frisbee it towards Mikey's brothers. Their eyes drifted down to the piece of paper and hesitantly, Donnie stepped out to pick it up. His horrified gasp was confirmation enough to Mikey even as his vision started greying at the edges. Thankfully, at that moment, Dogpound released some of the tension on the twisted links connected to his collar and he was able to draw in ragged, painful breaths once more.

"Before I came here, I sent some ninja to retrieve its head. Master Shredder looks forward to it adorning his throne room wall. Of course, none of you freaks will ever get the pleasure of seeing it but Spot here will see it every day for the rest of his miserable life," Bradford grinned, twisting the chain briefly again. "Since his training has proven so successful, Master Shredder has ordered Spot returned to New York where he will personally complete it."

No! Mikey sobbed. He'd rather go back to his kennel in the Foot compound than be brought to the Shredder. He stared beseechingly at his brothers to help him, tears of terror freely flowing their way down his cheeks.

Leo and Raph took immediate steps forward but Dogpound twisted the collar once more, making Mikey gasp in pain again even as the monster held something out in his other hand. The remote control to his collar, Mikey dimly recognised.

"Take one more step forward and I switch it on to full power," he growled. "You won't get the collar off Spot before it's too late!"

They stepped back again helplessly, Leo looking to Donnie for confirmation.

"He's right, that thing has enough charge to kill Mikey," Donnie swallowed in dismay.

"He won't do it though," Raph growled confidently, even as he made as if to dash forward. He didn't move, however. "He'd have to answer to Shredder for killing him if he did!"

"Can you take that kind of chance though?" Mikey could hear the maliciousness in Bradford's voice and shuddered. Of course, his Alpha wouldn't have to kill him. He could just electrocute him to the point of brain damage. Mai had explained to him long ago how that was possible and Dogpound had threatened it more than once.

"But death isn't the worst possible outcome from electrocution," Donnie whispered, his face pale as he met Mikey's terrified gaze.

"Good!" Bradford guffawed in pleasure, "You understand! Spot and I will take our leave and you three will stay here and die. Foot Soldiers! Kill the freaks!"

Suddenly, from the shadows crept dozens of armed figures who converged on his brothers and Mikey stared backwards in horror as he was reluctantly dragged from the room.

[Heel, Spot!] Bradford commanded, also clicking the command and Mikey couldn't help himself. His conditioning took over and he found himself trotting helplessly at his Alpha's heels as the former man led him from the factory and down to the docks.

-;-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them. 
> 
> Nasty cliffhanger just before Christmas? *Le gasp!* How could I!
> 
> Happy holidays, all!


	16. Chapter 16 - Pt 3 - The Umi Ryuu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.  
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.  
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU. 
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination. 
> 
> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas! Whether you celebrate Christmas, something else or nothing at all at this time, have a wonderful day and stay safe and well!

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 16

To his horror, Mikey was dragged to another shipping container, set up much like the one he'd traversed the ocean to Japan in. The difference was that this one was already hot as hell from the sweltering Japanese summer. Too terrified to enter, he hesitated at the doorway so Bradford kicked him inside, not caring about the way he helplessly slammed head and shoulder first into the back of the container from the powerful kick.

As Mikey groaned noiselessly, Bradford clipped the end of the leash to the wall and roughly grabbed his head, fixing the muzzle back in place far too tightly as always.

[Damn mongrel!] Bradford spat furiously, [Do you have any idea how much trouble you've fucking caused me?]

Shaking and unable to answer, Mikey stared up at his tormentor in terror.

[The evening you were dognapped, fucking Hakuba gave Master Shredder a report about you, telling him how well your training was going. Now Master Shredder demands you returned to him as a living trophy...]

Mikey shook his head rapidly in fear and Bradford picked him up, slamming him into the corrugated wall once more before dropping him painfully to the ground with his chin slamming down onto his metal paw. Mikey moaned silently in agony, fighting to stay conscious as Bradford continued to viciously kick him.

[... but you had been _stolen_!] Bradford roared in fury, spittle flying and hitting him in the face, making him flinch in disgust. [And you willingly chose to go with them!]

'Please...' Mikey cringed, blinking up with desperate, bleary eyes.

[You might be cowering like the whipped dog you are right now but being with them obviously put some fight back into you so I'm going enjoy beating it out of you once more!] Bradford snarled. [After all, we can't have Master Shredder seeing any kind of fight left in you when you are handed back over to him since he wants you 'cowed and obedient'!]

At that moment, the sea container suddenly jolted as a crane hooked onto it, lifting it into the air. Between his ringing ears and aching body, Mikey lost what little balance he had, while Dogpound easily held his ground with only a giant paw lightly against the wall for stability.

Time passed before the container settled in its new position and they heard the sound of the hook being detached. That was when the monstrous dog mutant pushed Mikey to his plastron, stepping on him as he forced the leg braces onto him once more.

[Get to your feet, you damn mongrel!] Bradford spat the moment he finally stepped away from Mikey.

Shaking in pain and fear, Mikey struggled to his hands and knees, swaying dangerously in place as his body threatened to keel over and dump him on the ground. He stood there panting, head hanging as he looked down at the ground in front of him.

[Get to your corner and stand there.]

What? Mikey risked a glance up in horrified disbelief; he could barely stand as it was and his Alpha wanted him to walk the few yards to get there and then stay on all fours?

[Now, Spot!] Bradford snarled angrily, backhanding him in the head and knocking him hard to the ground yet again.

For a moment, Mikey lay stunned but when Dogpound began to growl in warning, he hurriedly pushed himself up again and vision swimming alarmingly, stumbled drunkenly toward the indicated corner. There he shuffled slowly around to face the rest of the shipping container. While he really didn't want to see Dogpound, it was generally better to keep the monster in sight over not knowing when or where from any sudden attacks were coming.

Dogpound grinned maliciously. [From now on, you only eat, drink and defecate on command. You obey orders immediately, without delay.]

Mikey's eyes flashed wide in horror. Well, it wasn't like he could eat or drink with the muzzle on so tight that he couldn't even prise his jaw open but... but he already needed to go. He glanced over at the sandpit in the other corner with desperation and Dogpound's venomous grin only widened. Well, he'd just have to sneak over when the monster went to sleep and hopefully, it wouldn't be long before that happened.

[If you don't obey orders fast enough, you'll be punished and...] Dogpound paused and then laughed mockingly, [if you openly disobey even once, I'll arrange a new playmate for you who will undergo the same training you've been through.]

Mikey narrowed his eyes. What kind of threat was that? He'd heard his Alpha order his brothers killed... For a moment, the hatred he felt for the former martial arts celebrity waned and tears filled his vision, making the room even more blurry. Then Dogpound continued and hatred filled his soul once more.

[I was thinking perhaps that red-headed human friend of yours. What was her name again?] Dogpound pondered slowly. [May? June? Oh, that's right!] he grinned malignantly down at Mikey. [April! April O'Neil!"]

In his dazed state, Mikey frowned a moment - the name sounded so familiar - and then realisation dawned as he realised. No! He couldn't! She didn't deserve to go through what he had - the beatings, the loss of hands and ability to walk and talk, the humiliation, the... the... abuse... Mikey stared up at Dogpound, silently pleading with him not to touch her.

Bradford guffawed in spiteful delight. [Yes, I see wanting to keep your friend safe will keep you obedient. Can't have Master Shredder finding out your training was broken, after all.]

Mikey hung his head in shame once more.

[And to make sure you don't disobey while I'm asleep, that corner has a camera permanently trained on it,] Bradford leered, pointing up towards it. [I'll review the recording when I wake up to make sure you did as you were told.]

With that, Dogpound shone a spotlight in Mikey's direction, making him squirm uncomfortably from the direct brightness, before pulling a heavy curtain across the middle of the container and separating them.

[Goodnight, Spot,] Bradford mocked as Mikey heard him settle onto his mattress. Then the sweltering shipping container was filled with heavy silence until finally, the sound of the monster's rumbling snores filled the air and all Mikey could do was stand there trembling and swaying, feeling sick from the beating and heat and unable to even scream his frustrations, fear, anger and loss to the world.

-:-

As the day progressed, Mikey fought to stay on all fours even when all he wanted to do was give up and allow his body the rest it so desperately needed. More than once, his limbs caved, collapsing beneath him but he immediately struggled back to all fours, eventually using the movement to edge closer to the wall which he leant on for support, head hanging in exhaustion all the while. The snoring stopped and started at random and the occasional muttered complaints about 'interminable heat' and 'damned mongrel' reached his hearing. The ache in his bladder became unbearable and more than once he was tempted to disobey orders and just go, until a barely remembered face framed with red hair swam before his eyes, blues eyes looking pleadingly at him. Tears began to dribble down his face. His nightmare was far from over, in fact, it was just beginning anew now that he'd seen his family again and had the taste of freedom tease him.

Oh god... his father... his father was dead now because of him... and his brothers... well, he didn't know they were dead but there'd been so many ninja converging on them that doubts plagued Mikey's fatigued mind non-stop and he couldn't see any way they could've escaped with their lives. Even if they did somehow survive... he'd been taken from them again and was being transported back to the Shredder. This time he really wouldn't ever see them again.

He hiccuped as a broken sob tore its way from his chest.

How was he supposed to survive the trip back?

What else could the Shredder do to him that his Alpha, Mai, Master Hakuba, Three-Five-Eight and dozens of other Foot hadn't already done to him over and over?

Mikey had no clue and just thinking about it terrified him but he knew deep down that Saki would find something. His father was dead, soon to be a trophy mounted on Shredder's wall, and his brothers probably were too. That meant there was no one else left to take his vengeance out on but Mikey himself. Dogpound was highly sadistic but he had nothing on the Shredder who blamed his father for everything that had ever gone wrong in his life, even when he himself was always the cause.

He was beyond screwed.

His shaking intensified and his aching shoulders hunched in on themselves. His kennel at the Foot Compound was paradise compared to whatever was to come. At least there he had fresh air and sunlight. The same wouldn't hold true in Shredder's lair, that was for certain.

And his father... he gasped desperately for breath between the sobs.

He couldn't take much more and would have happily given up then and there if he didn't now have April's safety to think of. He had no doubts about Dogpound replacing him if he were to die. After all, with Splinter and probably his brothers dead, he was the only Hamato left. April wasn't a Hamato and while Dogpound and therefore Shredder probably didn't realise she was family regardless of name, they did know she was a close ally and friend. That would leave her as the last tie to the object of Shredder's stupid, unwarranted vengeance. Therefore... to protect her, Mikey had to live... whether he wanted to or not...

Another sob broke free and then pain rippled through him from the shock collar around his neck. Mikey fell, convulsing, to the ground, unable to even draw breath to scream. The shock went on for seemingly a lifetime before finally stopping and he lay there, gasping harshly for breath.

[Get back to your feet, mongrel,] Bradford growled angrily, [or I'll turn on the collar again and I thought you were told to hold on until I gave permission to go!]

Mikey grimaced as he fought to do as his Alpha demanded but all his limbs did was scrabble weakly for purchase in the disgusting puddle under him as they twitched incessantly from the recent shock and previous beating.

" _Get up!_ " Bradford roared in fury.

He tried, he really did but his abused body refused to cooperate.

[Bah! Disgusting animal! Lay there in your own filth, then! I'm going for a walk and you better be back on all fours by the time I return and if I catch you leaning against the fucking wall again, your friend will pay the price!]

Mikey's eyes slid closed as anguish flowed through him. His Alpha was asking too much of him... It seemed that no matter what happened, Dogpound would find a way to bring April into this... seemed to be looking forward to it, in fact, simply because he could see how much doing this to her too would hurt him.

[How does Lady sound for the name of your soon to be mate?] Bradford suddenly mused.

Mikey's eyes snapped open to stare at Dogpound in horror once more at the implications. No! He wouldn't, he'd never do that to her, no matter how much he was hurt... but... but that was the whole point of Dogpound bringing April into this, wasn't it? To hurt him more by hurting her.

[Too grandiose? Maybe,] Bradford laughed raucously, [but what else could be more fitting for a female dog once on the cusp of womanhood as a human? Hmm, I wonder if she'll be able to breed?]

Mikey fought to stand again and made it halfway before his body gave out once more. Bradford simply laughed and then left as the helpless tears flowed from Mikey.

-:-

All too soon, the door to the shipping container began to slowly creak open and Mikey blinked in panic and struggled to all fours, this time thankfully succeeding even if he stood wobbling unsteadily in place. He stared with trepidation towards the door, unable to see anything beyond the glare of the spotlight shining on him.

"Oh my god, it reeks in here!" A horrified voice gasped, choking and spluttering from the stench.

"Shh! Do you want to attract the entire ship to our location?"

"Personally, I'm surprised we didn't already attract attention by the sound of that door opening alone or even the sounds of the fight itself," a third voice muttered petulantly, huffing along with the sound of something heavy being dragged, "and seriously, Raph, I can't believe you're complaining about the smell when we live in the sewers."

Mikey blinked, not even daring to hope. He was probably just hallucinating or dreaming again. Yeah, that was it. The last twenty-four hours had taken their toll on him and he was currently laying unconscious in a puddle of his own waste and dreaming his brothers were still alive and had somehow managed to come for him despite all the odds.

The dragging stopped and the door slowly creaked closed. Then there was silence. Finally...

"Mikey?"

Oh god... please, please, _please_ let this be real...

Mikey whimpered silently as three silhouettes appeared beneath the blinding light. He lifted one heavy paw and reached out towards them, blinking rapidly. Then, the figures rushed towards him and that was the last Mikey knew as his eyes rolled up into the back of his head and he collapsed in exhaustion.

-:-

"How long until he wakes up?"

"I already told you, Raph! I don't know!"

"Calm down, Donnie," Leo soothed gently, "We're all worried about Mikey."

"I-I know, Leo but it's just that you and Raph always expect me to have the answers even when I clearly have no idea!" Donnie blurted in frustration. "Mikey's exhausted! Physically, mentally, emotionally. On top of that, he's been treated abominably! He's been beaten repeatedly and while thankfully none of his injuries are life-threatening and he doesn't appear to have any broken bones, he clearly has a concussion. He also has electrical burns from that shock collar and is suffering from extreme dehydration after being kept in what is essentially a hotbox all day without being able to drink thanks to a damn muzzle that was so tight it cut into his face!"

"Not that that bastard even left him with anything to drink in the first fucking place," Raph muttered darkly.

"Exactly," Donnie replied sounding as though in pain. "So no, I don't know when he's going to wake up."

"I just hope he sleeps long enough for us to dispose of the body," Leo said quietly.

'Eh? Body?' he thought muzzily to himself, far too exhausted and stiff to move. It would have been nice to open his eyes and confirm by sight that his brothers were really here but it was almost as nice just hearing their voices. He only felt bad because they were clearly worried about him and he couldn't bring himself to open his eyes to let them know he was okay.

"Huh? Why the hell would you hope that?" Raph asked, clearly puzzled and annoyed. By the comment or situation, he had no idea.

"The last thing Mikey needs right now is to be confronted with Bradford's body. Especially after all he's been through at the hands of that monster!"

"Are you serious, Leo? That's exactly why he _needs_ to see the body! Just telling him Dogpound's finally dead isn't going to cut it. Not after what just happened! He needs to see it for himself!" Raph half exploded. He was clearly struggling not to get too loud.

"No, he doesn't," Leo retorted tightly. "You've seen exactly how much that monster has terrorised him! He was so scared of him that he tried to return to him immediately after we first rescued him! The last thing Mikey needs is to see him."

Mikey shifted uncomfortably; why was he on his shell? Seeing the body was for him to decide, not Leo and much as the thought of laying eyes on his Alpha again terrified him, Raph was right, he needed to see his tormentor dead for himself or he wouldn't be able to believe it. Suddenly, he felt a hand resting on his forehead, thumb rubbing away soothingly and he managed to open his eyes, at last, to see Donnie staring down at him worriedly.

"Hey, buddy, how are you feeling?"

Awful. Mikey blinked twice as he struggled to get up.

"Mikey?" "Mikey!" his relieved and worried brothers called, immediately crowding him and making him feel trapped.

"Hang on, let us help you," Donnie murmured gently. He looked over at their brothers and Leo quickly shifted to the other side of Mikey and helped Donnie lift him to a sitting position.

Mikey gazed around the room anxiously. The curtain was drawn again and he was on the opposite side, Dogpound's side, on the mattress. The mattress? His eyes widened in fright as he stared down at it and almost freaking, he looked up to meet Raph's gaze.

"It's okay now, little brother. He's gone this time, really gone, I promise!" Raph quickly reassured, coming and crouching down in front of Mikey with a drawn smile to distract him from his surroundings. “We saw to it ourselves this time.”

Mikey blinked twice even as his breathing began to quicken. Not that he didn't trust his bothers but he needed to see, needed to know for one hundred percent! Mikey tried to push forward, determined to get up and look around for himself but Donnie and Leo held him gently but firmly in place.

"I'm sorry, Mikey, but you need to rest," Donnie stated in his 'doctor' tone.

But! Mikey blinked twice. No, he needed to...

But Donnie couldn't see his protests as he was already turning away and reaching out for something. Moments later, he was back, cup in hand. "Here," he offered gently, lifting it to Mikey's mouth, "drink this."

For a moment, Mikey tried to squirm away but he really was extremely thirsty so for once he caved to the help offered and tried to drink greedily from the cup, protesting wordlessly again when Donnie pulled it away all too soon.

"Slowly," Donnie warned sternly. "Take a couple of breaths and then you can have some more."

For the next few minutes, Mikey just drank and breathed before leaning heavily on Donnie, the exhaustion and pain taking over once more.

"It's okay, just rest now, it's over," Donnie reassured softly as he and Leo eased Mikey back down onto the mattress. Mikey frowned. No, there was something important he needed to do but for the life of him, he couldn't remember what it was. Suddenly, a massive yawn split his aching face and he stopped fighting his brothers, instead caving to the comfort of the sinfully soft mattress and his brothers and before long, he was asleep once more.

-:-

When Mikey woke again, he still ached all over and the splitting headache from earlier was still ever-present but he felt a lot better than he had before. He was still exhausted though and he couldn't help but yawn widely, almost dislocating his jaw in the process.

"Hey, you feeling better, Mikey?"

Mikey sluggishly turned his head to see Raph seated beside him on the ground next to the mattress and blinked once slowly. Then he turned his head the other way to see Donnie asleep beside him and Leo on the other side of Donnie.

Raph smiled tightly. "They were exhausted too so I told them I'd keep watch," he explained quietly as Mikey struggled to sit up without disturbing Donnie. Raph soon reached over to help. "Donnie said to give you more water if you woke again. Think you could drink some?"

'Yes please!' Mikey blinked eagerly, desperate for more of the precious liquid. It was still so hot in here! Though it did at least seem better than it was the day before but maybe that just was because his brothers were here with him.

Raph turned away, fiddling with something for a moment and then Mikey heard the sound of water being poured before his brother turned to him holding a cup and helped him to drink. Mikey felt himself heat up in embarrassment at needing to be helped like a baby but put up with it without argument.

"You should get some more sleep now," Raph murmured when Mikey had finished the cup.

'No,' Mikey blinked. He was still wiped but he wasn't sleepy and anyway, he was fed up with sleeping. All he wanted right now was the company of his brother so he gingerly crawled off the mattress and over to an alarmed Raph, leaning against him.

"Wha-what are you doing?"

Mikey snuggled closer, seeking the comfort and warmth he knew Raph gave so rarely but always in times of great need.

"You... I..." a sigh. "Fine... you can stay for now," Raph groused reluctantly, even as he snaked a strong arm around Mikey and pulled him in closer. Mikey smiled triumphantly, closing his eyes and trying to remember being home, safe in the lair with his family. Trouble was, while he could remember the feeling of home while being held like this, he couldn't actually remember a thing _about_ his home other than that it was in the sewers and that troubled him. Most of his memory had returned in the time since he'd been reunited with his brothers, at least, the memories about them had but he couldn't have told anyone what his bedroom looked like, where the dojo was or even the kitchen which he had some strange protective feeling over. All he could picture when he thought of home was the cold featureless kennel he'd lived in for much of the last year and the horrors of the Foot compound. He twitched anxiously in Raph's hold and snapped his eyes open again, not wanting to remember that place anymore.

"You really should try to sleep more, Mikey, you need rest to heal."

'No!' Mikey urgently blinked up at Raph.

"What do you mean, no? No, you don't need to rest..."

Mikey blinked twice again.

"... or no, you don't want to sleep?"

'Yes,' he blinked.

"That bad, huh?"

'Yes.'

"Nightmares?"

'Sort of,' Mikey struggled to lift a paw – his arm ached so much - and rocked it back and forth slightly before dropping it with a clang once more.

"What do you mean, sort of?"

Mikey sighed in a combination of misery and frustration. It wasn't nightmares per se, more memories that plagued him every time he closed his eyes. God, but he hated being trapped in his own head like this. He wanted to talk, needed to explain things but it was impossible and thanks to his Alpha, he'd lost the one chance he might have had to be able to communicate again for weeks.

"Right..." Raph muttered, also with a sigh. He began rubbing his hand up and down Mikey's arm and leaning into his brother once more, Mikey sighed again, allowing his gaze to drift languorously across the room before finally landing on his own body. He frowned at the sight of his legs, seeing the welts left behind from wearing the braces so long and lifted an unfeeling paw to press on the angry mark.  
  
“What are you doing?”  
  
Mikey shrugged, unsure. He couldn't feel the ridge or even his own skin through the metal but he could definitely feel the bruising in his thigh. As always, Dogpound had strapped them on far too tightly, even though Mai had them designed to be secure without needing to practically strangle his flesh.  
  
Suddenly, a large emerald green hand wrapped around his paw and lifted it away. “Are you worried about the braces?”  
  
Shaking slightly, Mikey slowly lifted his tired gaze to meet Raph's for a moment before hurriedly looking down once more.  
  
“You don't need to worry about those things ever again,” Raph spat angrily. “We got them off you when we cleaned you up earlier, along with that fucking shock collar and leash. Right now they're on the other side of that curtain but once the sun goes down, they're going over the side of the fucking ship! You'll never have to see them or wear them ever again”  
  
His eyes widening in shocked relief, Mikey lifted his gaze again, staring over at the curtain dividing the shipping container in half.

Gingerly, he worked himself free of Raph's arms and sat up. He really didn't want to go over there to revisit his personal hell but... he pulled away from Raph, standing unsteadily on all fours, then began walking towards it.

"Hey! Why are you going over there, Mikey?" Raph asked in sudden alarm.

Mikey turned his head to him, blinking six times. For a moment, Raph looked disturbed, almost betrayed and guilt threatened to swamp Mikey as he realised that that was the last thing he'd 'said' to Leo before he'd been captured and dragged away again. He gazed at Raph pleadingly, begging him while desperately trying not to jiggle in place and a defeated expression settled on his brother's face.

"Right... when you gotta go, you gotta go," Raph muttered, "but the toilet's that way," he said, pointing in the opposite direction to a hidden section created by a row of boxes and crates.

Mikey blinked in confusion but turned around and followed the path Raph indicated, wobbling uncertainly with every step he took. Suddenly, hidden from view of his brothers, Mikey froze as he stared at an overly large chemical toilet. Which... he couldn't use. Hell, he didn't even have room to turn around in. Dogpound may have been huge but unlike his Alpha, he was trapped on all fours, making him longer than Dogpound was wide. Defeated, Mikey began backing painfully out and trudged his way back toward the curtain.

"Wait, why are you going through there?"

Mikey stopped dead before looking back in the direction of the porta-potty. Then he lifted one paw slightly and looked pointedly at it.

"Oh... right... you can't use it," Raph realised with a cringe. "You uh... want some help then?"

'No!' Mikey blushed furiously. He'd just continue using the sandpit. At least with the curtain across, he'd have some privacy... He could always point out the camera later and hope Donnie would do something about it for him. Taking a deep breath to steel himself, Mikey pushed past the heavy curtain and choked on the stench on the other side. Holy crap but the stench of dead animal left to rot in the heat of the sun was overwhelming on this side!

Blinking watery eyes, Mikey realised he'd smelt the scent all along but it hadn't been strong enough to really notice before now and he wondered what it was. Then... he saw.

Dogpound.

He'd come for him yet again and Mikey was still trapped in here with him.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T for occasional language. Also see other warnings.  
> Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.  
> Summary: Bradford has always blamed Michelangelo for his misfortunes and especially for his mutation so when he manages to capture the young ninja, he's going to make sure he knows exactly what it's like. 2k12 AU.
> 
> Warning: Warnings for physical and mental torture in this story abound, as well as for implied and highly disturbing situations. Trigger warnings may apply for some chapters. There will not however, be gruesome details. Some things are best left up to the imagination. 
> 
> Concrit, thoughts and comments always welcomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Here is your new year's pressie, from me to you. A chapter I feel fitting to bring on the new year because of how it ends. After this, I will be back to fortnightly updates on this story since I have other stories to work on and also post but I will continue to endeavour to get something out each week. 
> 
> Happy New Year!

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 17

Mikey pushed past the heavy curtain and choked on the stench on the other side. Holy crap but the stench of dead animal left to rot in the sun was overwhelming on this side!

Blinking watery eyes, Mikey realised he'd smelt the scent all along but it hadn't been strong enough to really notice before now and he wondered what it was. Then... he saw.

Dogpound.

Mikey screamed silently, gasping for breath and scrabbling backwards into the curtain in terror. Panicking, he struggled to break free of the thick material entangling him only to bring it down on him instead, trapping him within its folds.

"Shit! Mikey!" Raph yelled in panic. “I'm coming, bro!”

"What's going on?" Leo asked in a tired but clipped tone.

"Fuck, Leo, I'm sorry. Mikey went on the other side of the curtain to..."

"You were supposed to watch him if he woke up, Raph!" Leo snapped sharply.

"I was!" Raph protested loudly. "He needed to... to go and I just... I didn't think, okay?"

Suddenly, the curtain was pulled free and Mikey gasped hysterically at the sight of Leo's face. He sobbed in relief, launching himself desperately at his oldest brother for comfort and safety.

"Get him back to the mattress," Donnie demanded as Leo hauled him to his feet and half-carrying him, led him away. "Raph, help me cover up Dogpound. We told you Mikey wasn't ready to see the body."

"I'm sorry, Donnie! I didn't mean for him to find Dogpound like that!"

"Why didn't you tell him where the actual toilet is instead of the damn sandpit?"

"I did!" Raph snapped impatiently. "He couldn't use it so he came over here instead!"  
  
“And you didn't _stop_ him?”  
  
“I told you, I didn't think!”

Heaving and safely ensconced in Leo's arms on the mattress, Mikey sniffled and hiccuped as his brothers argued. It really wasn't Raph's fault and it was unfair of them to blame Raph like that and honestly, he wanted to see Dogpound was truly dead for himself, he just... didn't realise he was there and wasn't ready for it at the time but unfortunately, he couldn't tell them that right now. Even if he still had his voice, he didn't have the emotional capacity to do so right now.

"Of course you didn't, you never do..." Donnie muttered in disgust. "I should never have agreed to sleep until I was sure Mikey was okay!"

"You were running on empty and you said it yourself that he wasn't in any danger!" Raph snapped furiously. Then he calmed down and sighed. "Look, I really am sorry, okay? I never meant to upset him."

Peeking past Leo, Mikey saw Donnie nod unhappily.

"I'm not the one you need to apologise to."

"Yeah..." Raph looked Mikey's way and he quickly ducked behind Leo again, still trembling violently from his scare. He was so ashamed. Maybe he couldn't be a ninja anymore after everything that happened but he was still brought up to be stronger than this, even if he always was the weak link in the team...

When he was sure Raph would no longer be looking his way, he peeped past Leo's arms again to see Donnie and Raph finish tucking the curtain over the hulking remains of Dogpound even as Leo tried, unsuccessfully, to shield Mikey from seeing it. When they were done, they picked their way across the short distance of the shipping container and knelt or sat down beside Mikey and Leo on the mattress.

"Are... are you alright now, Mikey?" Donnie asked hesitantly.

Still sniffling slightly, Mikey pulled out of Leo's arms enough to blink yes uncertainly at his brother.

"I'm so sorry I didn't warn you about that, Mikey," Raph apologised, his face full of anguish and unable to meet Mikey's eyes.

Mikey hesitated a moment, unsure how to answer to reassure his brother that he'd be fine, then he blinked once and wincing slightly from the strain, shakily reached out with his closest paw to rest it on Raph's arm. Raph stared down at the metal shackle uncertainly before looking up into Mikey's face.

"You... you forgive me?" he swallowed.

Mikey stretched his mouth into a broad smile he didn't feel and blinked once. 'Yes.' Then he pulled his arm back, letting it thunk down heavily in relief.

"Yeah, if it hurts that much to lift it like that, then don't do it," Raph admonished with a worried frown.

'It's fine,' Mikey blinked, hoping Raph would somehow understand but Raph's frown only deepened and the familiar frustration surged through Mikey once more, though he fought to cover it up as quickly as he could. From the looks his brothers exchanged, he wasn't fast enough and he buried his face against Leo's plastron again, no longer able to meet anyone's eye.

"This is all my fault... I'm sorry, Mikey..."

Huh? In disbelief, Mikey forced himself to look back up at Leo.

"I was the one who said to bring Dogpound's body in here..."

Donnie and Raph both snorted indelicately.

"It's not like we had any other choice, Leo!" Raph retorted in annoyance. "Think any of us liked doing that? It's beginning to reek!"

Beginning to? Smelt like he'd been dead for weeks! Mikey's breath hitched again at the thought. Only thing worse than his Alpha was a zombie Alpha. What if... what if he somehow rose from the dead. His terrified gaze slid over to the curtain covered corpse and for a moment, he was sure he saw twitching from where the monster's hand would be but suddenly, emerald green filled his sight and Mikey looked up to realise Raph had moved to block his view.

"... what happens when rotting flesh is kept in a hot box."

"We know, Donnie. We've all experienced that plenty of times during summer in the sewers," Leo said wearily. "The point is, though we didn't have any choice but to bring him inside with us, it was still my decision and therefore my fault."

'Why?' Mikey blinked his confusion.

"It was still early and there were too many sailors on deck. We couldn't risk being seen throwing the body over the side at the time and since there was the chance of someone having heard the fight and coming to investigate, we had to bring the body in here with us," Leo explained, correctly interpreting Mikey's question.

"Not to mention the fact that we were still far too close to Japan's shores," Donnie added solemnly. "The body may have eventually drifted ashore on the prevailing currents. It's better to wait for tonight or even tomorrow before throwing it overboard. Of course, without access to the ship's navigation system and a map to the ocean currents, I can't be certain of the best time for us to dispose of the body and there could still be risk of it washing ashore somewhere, no matter where or when we dump it but hopefully we'll be far enough away for scavengers to pick it apart before that happens."

Mikey shuddered again at the thought.

"Then," Leo spoke up again before Donnie could get too deep into his explanation, "there is the most important reason."

Which was? Mikey blinked uncertainly again.

"We were worried sick about you," Leo said softly, cupping a hand under Mikey's chin and lifting it gently. "After we got on board, which was a very close call, by the way..."

Speaking of which, Mikey was so desperate to know how they escaped the factory both alive and so fast as to catch up to him before it was too late but _dammit_ , he had no way of asking.

"... we quickly discovered where you were but thanks to the rising dawn, we were unable to get to you without risk of being seen by the crew. That and we were worried about what he'd do to you if we broke in."

What about what he was already doing... Mikey shuddered again as he remembered the beatings, cruelty and the threats.

"We know Bradford was already hurting you again and I'm so sorry we waited but if we broke in then, he would have seen us and if he didn't outright kill you before we could get to you, he would have hurt you so much worse than he already was..."

Feeling beyond helpless and pathetic, Mikey looked down at the mattress again, frowning.

"We had no choice but to wait until after dark and he came out or we could be sure he was asleep..." Leo continued, sounding so guilty that Mikey had to look up again only to see Leo drowning in it. Swallowing back his trepidation, Mikey moved close to his brother again and buried his face into his plastron again, wrapping his arms around him as best he could.

Leo hesitated as if frozen before returning the hug and Mikey was sure he felt something wet hit the top of his head. Suddenly, he sensed movement from behind and before he could turn and look, two more sets of warm, muscled green arms wrapped around both of them and Mikey finally let the tears roll down his face as he felt safe and loved for the first time in a very long time.

-:-

Emotionally wrung out, Leo had fallen back asleep and since Raph had yet to sleep, Donnie volunteered to stay up on watch. Mikey lay uncomfortably between the two sleepers, Leo clutching him as if he might vanish in the night again.

Suddenly, Donnie started in realisation. "You never made it to the toilet, did you?"

Mikey grimaced in pain from his full bladder, 'No,' he replied, embarrassed and desperate.

"Come on then," Donnie said softly, leaning across and working to gently pry off Leo's death grip before helping him off the mattress.

'Thanks.' Mikey shot Donnie a grateful smile.

"I can help you with the real toilet if you like, buddy," Donnie offered but Mikey quickly blinked no.

Gingerly, since he was still in pain, Mikey edged his way past Bradford's stinking body towards the sandpit, stopping only briefly to stare up at the camera, pointing it out to Donnie. Once his brother was sufficiently distracted, he took the opportunity to go before making his way back to the bed and curling up on his plastron. Leo's arms immediately wrapped around him again and though he started at the sudden contact, Mikey soon wriggled gratefully closer into it.

"Was that camera Dogpound's way to keep watch over you even when he left or slept?"

'Yes,' Mikey shuddered, remembering how his Alpha used the camera to threaten April.

Donnie fell silent for a while and Mikey watched him carefully from where he laid between his brothers hoping desperately that his brother's insatiable curiosity and need to know what happened to Mikey wouldn't lead him to track down the footage and watch. He shuddered again at the thought of Donnie seeing his shame first hand, especially since he'd never fought back.

"Mikey," Donnie suddenly spoke up again after some time. "I know you can't be feeling too well right now but I need to know how bad it is."

'How...' Mikey thought hopelessly.

"We need to expand your way to communicate."

'Really...' Mikey sighed. The sheer amount of blinks were already becoming too much. Surely Donnie couldn't expect more out of him.

"I was thinking if you are ever feeling sick, stick out your tongue like you are pretending to throw up, okay?"

Simple enough... Mikey stared at Donnie doubtfully.

"And as for how bad or if you are in pain, rate it between one and ten but with one being really bad, okay?"

Tedious but at least his brother considered how hard it would be for him if he was really sick and had to blink ten times. He gave a single blink.

"So if you are ever feeling sick, you _need_ to tell me, okay, Mikey?"

'So we can play twenty questions?' he wondered sarcastically before sighing and reluctantly answering, 'Yes.' To be honest, while he hated this, it really was nice to have someone actually care about him again.

"So how do you feel?"

Mikey thought about it for a bit, then blinked five times.

"Pain, not sick?"

'Yes.'

"Your head?"

'Yes.' Mostly. The rest of him ached too but it wasn't too bad other than the tenderness in his throat from both the collar earlier and Dogpound's grip and his right shoulder that had slammed into the wall.

"I did find a first aid kit in here earlier. I can check to see if the pain medication is okay for us to use if you like," Donnie offered kindly.

'No.' He'd had far worse than this and besides, after the things he'd been given in the past ten months, taking tablets of any sort freaked him out. If he had any say in the matter, he wouldn't do it. Of course, he shuddered and closed his eyes tightly a moment, if he was ordered he'd probably have no choice. He hoped desperately Donnie wouldn't do that to him.

"Are you sure, Mikey?" Donnie asked worriedly, studying him as if to catch a lie.

'Yes,' Mikey replied again irritably, closing his eyes after. Conversation over, such as it was being so one-sided.

"Okay. Well, you should try to sleep more then," Donnie replied uncertainly. "We're all here if you need us. Okay?"

Mikey didn't even bother to answer, just laid there with his eyes closed and face buried in Leo's plastron, pretending to sleep in the heat.

-:-

At some point, he must have managed to actually sleep because when he next awoke, it was to three voices talking softly and not one of his brothers at his side. His eyes fluttered open and he looked around to see them all by his Alpha's body, Raph and Leo working together to lift it.

Mikey stared in confusion a moment before suddenly realising they were ready to dump it. Breathing in sharply, Mikey jumped to all fours and quickly trotted over, pleased to discover his balance better than earlier even if he was still somewhat shaky, especially with the faster movement.

"What are you doing, Mikey?" Leo asked flatly. "You should still be in bed."

'No.' He stared at the covered head for a moment, refusing to move, before shifting his pleading gaze to Raph, the one brother who he knew would understand.

"He wants to see the body."

Good ol' Raph, coming through for him in his time of need.

'No," Leo said flatly again.

"It's a bad idea, Mikey," Donnie said softly, getting in between him and the body of his tormentor. Mikey tried to dart around him but a wave of dizziness hit and he stumbled, his aching right arm folding painfully under him.

Raph put his end of the body down. "He'll never get closure if he doesn't see it."

'Yes,' Mikey agreed, shrugging off Donnie to push himself up again. To be honest, he wasn't sure that was quite the case but he needed to see, just to convince himself it really was over, that Dogpound could never hurt him or April or anyone else ever again.

"It doesn't matter if we think it's a good idea or not," Raph continued stubbornly as he fought for Mikey. "This is his only chance. If it goes badly, we'll still be here for him afterwards. If he misses this chance then we'll all have to live with the consequences forever, no one more than Mikey."

"And if he freaks out again?" Leo demanded, also putting his end of the body down and crossing his arms as he challenged Raph.

Mikey bristled. Yeah, it was a good question and it might happen but honestly, last time...

"You can't blame him for his reaction last time!" Raph snapped irritably. "He didn't know the body was there and walked blindly into it!"

'Yes!' Mikey blinked, jutting his jaw in determination as he agreed - not that he was certain anyone was paying any attention to him right now but that was completely beside the point.

"What if it gives him nightmares?"

"He's already getting those! Why do you think he doesn't sleep well?" Raph countered, annoyed at the continued resistance. "Seeing Dogpound is really dead might actually help ease them. Look, Leo, Donnie, we owe it to Mikey to let him decide. This needs to be his choice! Not ours!"

Mikey turned and gazed up at Raph gratefully. In the past, Raph rarely stood up for him but he always did when it was truly important and Mikey was never more grateful for that than right now.

"I hate to say it but Raph may actually be right for once," Donnie agreed reluctantly, "and it's not like we'll be leaving Mikey alone afterwards."

Leo's face softened. "I see the point but I still don't like it."

"Neither do I but we can't take this last chance away from him," Donnie pointed out, wincing painfully at the thought.

Leo turned and crouched down in front of Mikey, meeting his eye level. "Are you sure you want to do this? You really don't have to. No one will judge you badly if you don't."

'Yes,' Mikey replied obstinately. He did have to. He peered nervously past his brother and swallowed.

'Fine..." Leo sighed in resignation. He stepped back, turning as he did and pulled back the curtain covering his Alpha's furry, hate-filled face.

Mikey took a hesitant step forward and then another and another, stopping half a metre from the body and stared. For a moment he toyed with lifting a paw and prodding at the monster's head to test he was really dead but it wouldn't have helped since he couldn't feel anything through the thick metal anyway and besides, the idea of actually touching that thing disgusted him. As he watched, his emotions ran rampant, shifting from fear to anger to hatred and cycling back to fear again.

Once upon a time, he'd looked up to the man Chris Bradford was, foolishly believing they could be friends since they had so much in common and the man had encouraged him before finally showing his true colours and turning on Mikey, attempting to use him as bait to trap his family all in an effort to find their father. Since then, the man had an intense hatred of him, seeking him out specifically and attacking him at every chance, blaming him for everything that went wrong, for every failure.

For his mutation...

The man had been sadistic and resentful, the mutant, far, far worse.

Mikey didn't like to hate. It was an ugly emotion that took up way too much time and energy but right now, it was overwhelming. His Alpha... no, Dogpound, had taken everything from him! Even his will to live for a time and he got off so easily, dying in battle against his brothers.

How was this fair?

He was dead and Mikey never had the chance to tell the monster just what he thought or to fight back and… and he was never going to get that chance now.

At... at least Dogpound could never hurt anyone again...

Mikey bared his teeth at the stinking corpse in an angry snarl. He hated him so much and he couldn't even say it!

… _he couldn't even_ say _it_...

Suddenly, tears filled his eyes and he began to shake.

Even in death, his Alpha had won... and Mikey... he was just a helpless animal owned and without rights or a voice of his own.

He turned his head, unable to stand looking at his nemesis any longer, yet unable to simply walk away.

"Okay, he's had enough," Leo said softly. "We need to get rid of the body now before we lose our chance."

Mikey was vaguely aware of Raph agreeing and the two of them lifting the body once more. Donnie crouched beside him, "Will you be alright for a moment? I need to open the door for them."

'Yes,' he quickly lied, unable to watch as his brother stood and rushed over to the door, leading the other two out with their burden.

Moments later, Donnie was back and leading Mikey back to the mattress that still reeked of Dogpound. Mikey choked and pulled away, laying on the floor instead.

"You'll be much more comfortable on the mattress," Donnie insisted gently.

'No,' Mikey blinked back, refusing to move.

Donnie remained silent a moment before, "Okay. Do you mind if I turn the light off?"

Not caring either way, Mikey shrugged.

"We really need to air this place out, not to mention try to cool it down a bit and we can't keep the door open even a little with the light on in here. It could attract attention if anyone were to investigate for any reason."

Mikey sniffled. Surely just having it on and the door open for even a moment would be too much risk regardless. It was why Dogpound had always left him in the dark when he left on the original journey to Japan. He could only imagine the reason he had left the spotty on Mikey this time was because of the thick blackout curtain that hung between them.

"Stay there, I'll be right back."

With that, Donnie jumped lightly to his feet and switched the light off before going to the door and opening it a little. Then he was quickly back by Mikey's side, sitting down and placing a comforting hand on his shell and rubbing.

"We really are lucky that the end of this container faces the rear of the ship. The chances of anyone seeing anything are extremely slim."

Mikey turned his head away, sniffling slightly again and Donnie fell silent before laying down beside him and wrapping his arms around him, drawing him closer.

"It's alright to be upset, Mikey," Donnie murmured soothingly. "You've been through a lot. No one expects you to just pick up and be your old self after all that."

Mikey bared his teeth again and hissed the air between them in an approximation of a growl.

"I'm sorry but I needed to let you know you don't have to try to hide your feelings from us. We are your brothers and no one is going to tease or mock you for them; not for something like this. We're here for you now and we always will be, even if we aren't the best at showing it..."

'Just leave me alone,' Mikey groaned, wishing like hell he could tell Donnie that, even if he didn't really mean it deep down. God, with the lights off, he'd even lost his ability for the most basic communication.

Donnie rolled over onto his shell, removing his arm from around Mikey but still keeping the other arm pressing against his side. Mikey told himself he couldn't be bothered taking the chance to sidle away.

"I'm so sorry I took so long back at the factory... if only I'd been faster at working out the particulars, I could have removed those damn manacles... and if I'd been able to do that, maybe Bradford wouldn't have had the chance to take you again," Donnie muttered sorrowfully. "Though I have to wonder just how he found you without the tracking chip."

Mikey sniffed loudly three times but Donnie didn't take the hint.

"Someone must have seen us after all."

Ugh... how could someone so smart be so dumb sometimes? He sniffed exaggeratedly again.

He didn't know why Donnie not listening to him bothered him so much. Sure, he'd lost his voice and all but really, nothing had actually changed. It's not like anyone had ever even listened to him in the first place anyway.

Suddenly, a faint sound at the door caught his attention and Mikey lifted his head, eyes narrowed in fear as he tried to make out what he'd heard. To his intense relief, the silhouette of Raph appeared, followed by Leo a moment later.

"Hey, why's the door open and the light off?"

"To let in some fresh air," Donnie replied as if it were obvious.

"Oh, thank god for that," Raph groaned in relief. He pulled out a small penlight from a pouch on his belt, shining it around the container.

"Why are you two on the floor instead of the mattress?" Leo asked in surprise.

"I don't know," Donnie frowned. "Mikey refused to go back on it, despite the fact it would be far more comfortable."

"It was Dogpound's. Probably smells like him," Raph said drily, briskly walking past them with purpose. Mikey shifted his head to watch as Raph picked up his braces, shock collar and chain. Raph smiled tightly. "Over the side of the fucking ship," he repeated with a barely noticeable wink in the dim lighting.

"We're going to scout the ship a bit before coming back but we'll be back before too long," Leo promised.

"Be careful."

"Always," Leo replied, even as Raph snorted derisively.

Donnie was silent for a couple of minutes after they left again and when he finally spoke, it was in surprise. "Smell! Dogpound sniffed you out. He must have come across your scent out on the street!"

Mikey turned his head to stare at Donnie in disbelief. It was too dark to make out his expression.

"And... you tried to tell me that just now, didn't you?" Donnie sounded like he felt sick with the realisation.

Mikey didn't even bother to answer. What was the point?

"We have to do something about this problem. We can't wait for the three or four weeks to get home without you being able to talk to us."

Mikey shrugged. What was he supposed to do? His vocal cords were paralysed and his hands encased in metal. It was impossible.

"I've been thinking about this a lot over the last few days and I believe I have an idea that will work," Donnie offered quietly.

Really... he only hoped Donnie wasn't trying desperately to give him false hope because he really wasn't sure he could handle it if so.

"Can you..." he swallowed nervously, "move or something, just to show me you're awake and listening?"

Mikey just continued staring into the darkened shadow that was his brother's face for a moment more until Donnie sighed.

"Right... well... I guess we can talk about this when you wa..."

Mikey quickly shifted his paw to press against Donnie.

"Mikey? You're awake?"

'Yes', he tapped once; of course he was. Wasn't like he could sleep anyway with Donnie yammering on at him. He just desperately hoped that Donnie would realise the tap was replacing his blink.

"D-did you hear what I said?" he asked nervously.

'Yes,' he tapped again.

A sigh of relief. "Good, good. Well, believe it or not, you're on the right track of what I had in mind."

Mikey tapped his confusion.

"I do have a quick question though..."

'Yes?' Go on... Mikey encouraged just as nervously.

Donnie shifted and sat up to peer down at Mikey in the darkness.

"Does tapping like that hurt in any way?"

Mikey thought seriously about it before pushing himself upright and answering, 'No'. It didn't hurt at all, just felt a bit awkward as he wasn't used to the movement. 'Why?' he asked, tapping his confusion again.

"Because I want to teach you a new language you can use by tapping," Donnie admitted slowly.

A new language? Donnie's big solution was to teach him a new language? His breath hitched in his throat as a sob threatened to break free. 'No!' he tapped harder than necessary on the ground of the shipping container. Donnie didn't have the patience to teach him anything new, hadn't had for the past few years, in fact. He was far too stupid to learn... something that had been drilled into him time and time again his whole life.

And especially during recent months...

'No!' he repeated with emphasis, shifting back to all fours as quickly as he could and stumbling his way to his corner to get away from his brother as tears threatened to fall yet again. Donnie trying to teach him another language would only end up in frustration on both of their parts, anger on Donnie's and upset... fear... on his. He loved his brothers so much but every time one of them even raised their voice now, he was reduced to a quivering mess. He couldn't handle it anymore.

Seriously, why did Donnie have to get his hopes up like that? Mikey fought the sob that threatened to again break free, choking on the lack of air caused by the tightness of the stupid metal collar.

"Mikey! Mikey, wait!" Donnie cried softly, getting up and running lightly after him. "Will you please just hear me out?"

Why should he? It wouldn't work... He curled up in his corner, pressing tightly into it.

"Is this because you have a hard time learning?"

Against his better judgement, Mikey tapped once, ever so softly. It was enough.

"Look, Mikey, I promise I won't get mad at you or lose my patience. We'll take it at your pace, okay?"

He uncurled from the corner and peered up at Donnie who crouched behind him, listening.

Donnie took a deep breath, steadying himself. He reached out and pulled Mikey up to a sitting position so they were at eye level to each other, even though it was far too dark to make out any details.

"I know you've always had trouble learning new things but that's only because you have trouble focusing but here's something else I know, whenever you really want to or need to learn something and when it really counts, you've always been able to manage. Always!"

Right! Mikey snorted disdainfully. Donnie had no idea how much hard work and effort went into those few times, how much it exhausted him to try and it really wasn't something he could keep up for too long.

"I'm serious, Mikey. The time you saved us from those parasitic wasps is a great example of that. I bet you could still make the cure from memory, even now, well over a year later."

Mikey was sure he heard a slight smile in Donnie's voice and he sat up a little straighter. This was the first time he'd heard any real acknowledgement of what he'd managed to do that day.

"Here's the other thing I know that I'm not sure anyone else has ever noticed, you actually have a great memory. I'm not sure I would quite call it photographic... but it's up there. For you though, it seems that if you concentrate and try to focus, it doesn't go so well but when you just let yourself absorb things without thinking about them, you're amazing, little brother."

Really? Did he... really, actually mean it? Mikey's eyebrow ridges rose questioningly. Whenever he'd mentioned things like that before, he'd been scoffed at and mocked so hearing it now... he wasn't quite sure if he should trust in Donnie or not.

"What I'm trying to say is that I believe in you, that you can do this because you have more reason in the world than anyone to try right now," Donnie insisted eagerly. "So would you be willing to try? Because I really need to hear your words again and... and if you can talk to us then I might be able to find a way to help you."

'You can't...' Mikey thought sadly, 'but...' what harm could it do to at least try? Maybe Donnie wouldn't snap at him over his ineptitude or maybe he would and if he did, he could freak out for a while and then just try again. Whatever Donnie had in mind wouldn't be talking obviously but... but Mikey needed so much to be able to get his words out. It had been killing his soul little by little ever since Mai had done this to him. The sheer frustration and helplessness, he was so sick of it all and if Donnie's plan could help him to feel a little less helpless in any way... 'Yes,' he finally tapped.

A broad smile broke out on Donnie's face - Mikey could hear it in his voice, see it in the way he straightened in excitement.

"Great! Now what I had in mind is basically an old communication code that uses dots and dashes, basically tapping sounds known as dits and dahs to represent letters. Now, I know you won't be able to elongate the sound for the dahs but we can work around that easily enough, I'm sure. Alternatively, you could blink in Morse too but that won't help in the dark, not to mention we'd have to be looking directly at you for that. Using sound is far better!

"You have no idea how glad I am you agreed to this, Mikey!” Donnie gushed in excitement. “I can hardly wait to teach you Morse Code!"

Mikey just stared at his shadowed brother. What the hell had he just gotten himself into?

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: A good chapter to start the year on. On that note, HAPPY NEW YEAR from Australia (where it is just after 1 am on New year's Day)! May 2021 be a far better year than the steaming pile of crap 2020 was.
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Donnie starts teaching Mikey how to 'talk' again and then the shit hits the proverbial.

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 18

Donnie started by teaching Mikey the vowels, starting with E, the easiest in the alphabet to remember and then sent him to bed, pointing out how he needed to rest to give his concussion and other injuries a chance to heal.

When Mikey next woke up, it was to find himself back on the mattress with Donnie and Raph asleep to one side of him and Leo awake and on watch.

"Morning, Mikey," Leo greeted in a slightly hoarse voice.

Mikey gave him a small smile in return, lifting his right paw in an attempt to wave.

"Are you feeling any better today?" Leo asked, reaching for the water and offering it.

'Yes,' Mikey blinked, tapping once at the same time before accepting the drink.

"When Raph and I returned last night, the three of us got to talking," Leo began hesitantly. "Unfortunately, we had to throw out the curtain..."

Mikey blinked and tapped once. Made sense to him. After his Alpha had been wrapped in it so long, they never would have got the stench of dead dog out, especially considering the continual heat...

"... so we decided to redecorate in here."

That made Mikey take notice. He pulled back away from Leo and looked around past him. The boxes and crates had all been moved, creating a wall mostly blocking off the other end which had been his area and leaving a wide-open space at the end the mattress was in. There was a gap in the middle leaving enough room for them to move past.

"Since you don't want help, we figured it would be best to arrange privacy around the sandpit. We also moved the chemical toilet there too, to give some extra open area in this already cramped shipping container."

Mikey's eyes widened in surprise.

"Donnie also noted how you gravitated to one corner when you were upset last night and while I can't say I'm too thrilled about the idea of that, everyone needs some space to be alone now and then – something Raph was very quick to point out,” Leo gave a small smile at that, “so we also made sure to keep that corner clear and placed a blanket on the ground to make it a little more comfortable. Along with a water bowl we'll try to keep full, just in case."

A small smile lit Mikey's face.

"However," Leo continued sternly, "one, that area is for anyone to use if they need time alone and can't get outside - you know how Raph can get sometimes…"

Mikey tapped once with an amused shake of his shoulders and a silent chuckle. Not to mention Leo and his crazy meditation obsession.

"Wait... are you making fun of me?"

'Yes,' Mikey admitted with a broad grin up at his brother.

Leo sighed in mock exasperation but a relieved smile sneaked past his guard. He shook his head and continued talking as if he hadn't been interrupted.

"And two, you can't use it as a crutch to hide away in simply because you don't want to face things."

But why else would he want to go to such a place if he wasn't upset and didn't want to face it?

"Do we have a deal?"

'... Yes,' Mikey reluctantly blinked.

"Good," Leo relaxed in relief. "So, are you hungry?"

Oh boy, was he ever! The last time he ate was before Dogpound recaptured him and they hadn't been able to get much. He canted his head slightly. Taking into account he didn't really know how long he'd been in here, that was more than two days ago now! 'Yes!' he blinked eagerly.

"Oh good! Now there's the Mikey I remember," Leo teased. He stood and went over to one of the boxes in the crate wall. "Um... when was the last time you ate? Did Dogpound feed you at all in the day he had you?"

'No,' Mikey replied, pulling a face at the reminder.

"So over two days then," Leo winced. "Okay, in that case, you'll just have to go easy at first. Don't eat too much too fast. Although, that being said we'll have to be careful with the food anyway. Despite Dogpound being so large and needing so much, there isn't really enough for four of us for three weeks, assuming that's all we're aboard for, so we're going to have to ration the food."

Mikey stood and padded over to Leo, looking up at him curiously. Was that including his food? He somehow doubted it, not that he blamed them. Whether Dogpound had actually brought his usual food along with them or just gone for the cheap cans of supermarket pet food, it wasn't very appetising. The food Mai had insisted on for him wasn't bad per se, it was more how it was prepared. Blended together into a mousse or stew style mush to emulate dog food while still giving him what he needed to stay healthy. Either way, if it came down to it, Mikey was used to it enough that he could put up with it for a bit longer but.... how to communicate that to his brothers? He stared down at his paws uncertainly. He couldn't. At least not until Donnie taught him more Morse Code. Speaking of, could he even remember what he'd been taught last night? As Leo prepared a small meal on a disposable plastic plate - throwing away was apparently better than wasting limited water on washing - Mikey thought about the letters he'd been shown and hesitantly began tapping them out, bobbing his head in time in concentration.

E was easy. It was the same as tapping for yes instead of blinking - one single dit, as Donnie called it. O he already knew, along with S from when they were younger and playing around and Donnie had insisted on teaching them SOS to use in a game. A and I were likewise easy once he thought about it. Only U gave him pause but after some effort, he thought he had it.

"What are you doing?" Leo asked in concern, standing over him with the plate in hand.

'Practising,' Mikey replied mentally, even though there was no way Leo could read his mind, no matter how scary his brother could be at times.

Leo simply stared down at him uncomprehendingly as Mikey smiled guilelessly up at him. Then he schooled his face. "Where would you like to eat?"

Mikey shrugged. Anywhere was fine. Wasn't like there were tables or chairs in here anyway, even if he could use them.

"Okay, well... lets at least go near the mattress," Leo suggested quietly, walking over and putting the plate on the ground before sitting nearby. "Take it easy so you don't make yourself sick, okay?"

'Yes,' Mikey agreed, eyeing the food hungrily. He walked over slowly as a reminder to himself to take it slow and leaned over to take a bite. Cold baked beans. Gross! Yet he was so hungry that nothing had ever tasted so good in his life and it was at least better than canned pet food. He closed his eyes and thought of better food; pancakes, waffles, bacon and eggs. His imagination kicked in big time and he swore he could taste them, dripping in thick syrup.

“Slow down,” he was dimly aware of Leo chiding sternly and he tried, he really did but he was so hungry and it tasted so good!

"What the hell?” Raph mumbled, choosing that moment to wake up. He sat up to see Mikey hungrily wolfing the food down. “Mikey!" he cried in disgust at the sight.

Mikey glanced up at Raph blushing guiltily as Leo pulled the plate away. "I told him to eat slowly."

'I was eating that!' Mikey protested silently. He tried desperately to reach up for the plate but was held down by the weights on his hands. He scowled in frustration.

"Slow down and you can have it back," Leo admonished sternly.

'Was slow!' Mikey pouted petulantly. And he had been, especially compared to other times when he'd been fed with the dogs instead of in his own cage. He turned on the puppy eyes and Leo began to melt when he suddenly froze as he realised what he was doing and shuddered. That's right, he couldn't do that any more. He swore months ago he'd never do it again if he got away from the Foot. His breath hitched painfully in his throat and Leo and Raph exchanged worried looks.

"Uh... you okay, little brother?" Raph ventured carefully. “look, I'm sorry I made a fuss when you probably haven't eaten in days. It was just shocking to...”

Mikey shot Raph a terrified look before racing off for the now hidden corner, shaking uncontrollably.

-:-

They left him alone for a while which suited Mikey just fine but before too long, Leo came after him, plate in hand and put it down in front of where he lay curled up and shaking.

"You should finish your breakfast, Mikey," Leo suggested softly, placing his hand on Mikey's shell and gently rubbing, ignoring the way he flinched violently at the unexpected touch. "I'm not quite sure what happened back there but there's no need to be upset. I was only trying to slow you down so you wouldn't be sick and... you really should clean your face or if you like, I could do it for you. Baked beans are really messy," he added with a small, half-laugh.

He could just die from embarrassment. The last thing he wanted was to be treated like a helpless animal by his big brother. Mikey turned his head away and surreptitiously wiped his face on his arm before licking up the half-dried sauce. Leo, being the ever-observant turtle he was, had to have noticed but thankfully chose to act as if he didn't. Then, eyes flicking up at Leo worriedly, he shifted to the plate, still hungry but he hesitated, looking up again.

Leo's face filled with hurt before becoming emotionless once more, the way he so often did when Mikey accidentally hurt or scared him. "Would you like me to leave so you can eat in peace?"

'Please,' Mikey begged silently, blinking once.

"Alright, I'll go but as I said earlier, I don't want you hiding away here all the time. Come back out soon after you finish eating, okay?"

'Okay,' Mikey replied, looking down again once he answered.

"Okay, we'll see you soon, then."

Mikey watched Leo reluctantly walk away before returning to the plate of cold beans in disgust. To be honest, he actually preferred his food to this. He sighed miserably and began to eat once more, this time without imagining something nicer.

-:-

Sometime after he finished, Mikey steeled himself and stood, picking up the plastic plate in his teeth and tentatively walked back out to the main area where he saw Donnie too, was now awake. Thinking back, he vaguely recalled hearing his voice murmuring softly but he'd been too upset at himself to really notice at the time. Blinking an embarrassed greeting at Donnie, he dropped the plate at Leo's feet and glanced around, seeing Raph leaning into a corner by the door, then he turned and walked the path to the sandpit, seeing the chemical toilet close by.

Hurriedly, he relieved himself before going back and blinking he was thirsty. Donnie fetched him some water, helping him to drink it from a cup and then he settled down beside the mattress and tapped out the vowels, looking up at Donnie expectantly.

A delighted grin spread across his brother's face, proudly showing off his diastema.

"That's great, Mikey! You're slightly off with the U though. Here, I'll demonstrate," Donnie offered excitedly. A moment later, Mikey repeated it perfectly.

"Feel up to learning a few more?"

'Yes!' Mikey blinked desperately, sitting up to attention.

"What are you bozos doing?" Raph grunted incredulously, staring accusingly at them from across the room.

"I'm teaching Mikey Morse Code so he can talk to us again."

"So that's what he was doing earlier!" Leo stated in surprise.

"Earlier?" Donnie asked, turning to look at Leo in shock.

"Yeah, while I was getting some food for him, he just started tapping away like that. I wondered what he was up to but well, he couldn't tell me."

'Not true,' Mikey thought flippantly. He had told him, kinda but it wasn't his fault Leo couldn't read his mind. Then he frowned as he remembered that Leo could, if he was willing to go into the Astral Plane and let him, which he was not.

Donnie's smile returned, brighter than before. "See, I told you you'd be fine learning this," he stated proudly, turning back to Mikey.

Mikey smiled tentatively up at him, then tapped out the vowels again as a hint to continue.

"That's great," Raph grunted, "but be careful, huh? The sound of that shit travels. You might attract attention we really don't need."

"Hmm... Raph has a point," Donnie murmured, "especially in a metal container on a metal ship..."

Despondent, Mikey's face fell. So... he shouldn't learn this after all?

"Hey, that's not a reason to stop, it's just a reason to be careful," Donnie quickly blurted. "Here," he pulled the blanket from the mattress, spreading it partly on the ground. "Try tapping on that. Hopefully, it will be muffled enough to deaden the sound from travelling too far, yet still allow you to learn by sound."

Mikey canted his head, blinking his confusion.

"As I said last night, it's easier to learn if you don't try to memorise how the dits and dahs look but rather how they sound."

'Yes,' that made sense, especially since he couldn't see it.

"When you become more fluent, you'll be able to read it easily if there was ever any need or you could even feel it. There'd be no reason you wouldn't be able to tap directly onto my arm or leg for example but I'd rather not try that yet since you've just started learning."

'Okay,' Mikey blinked. He tapped out the vowels on the blanket, testing it out and then tapping them again a little more softly.

"Yes, that's good," Donnie encouraged with a wide grin.

Mikey smiled up at his brother and then waited patiently for the next letter, ignoring Leo - he didn't want to be distracted - as he came over and sat beside them to learn as well.

-:-

"So why'd you go back to Dogpound at the factory anyway?" Raph suddenly asked quietly as Donnie and Leo slept later that day. Mikey had slept for a while too but even hurt and exhausted as he was, there was only so much rest he could take, especially since that had never been an excuse to miss out on training with his Master. It was painfully obvious to Mikey that the question had been plaguing his brother for some time by the hurt in his voice. Probably since the night he was recaptured, he figured.

"I thought you trusted us," he whispered stiffly, refusing to look Mikey's way as he spoke.

Mikey sat up on the mattress and stared at Raph in betrayal. 'Yes', he tapped desperately, he did trust them, more than anyone. How and why would his brother ever think otherwise? The lack of faith in him hurt but how could he convince him when he couldn't talk and Raph wouldn't look at him. He pushed himself up on all fours and despite his growing fear, shakily began walking to Raph, determined to make him look at him and understand.

"So then _why_ do it?" Raph repeated, his voice strained as he fought unsuccessfully to swallow the emotion in his voice. He turned eyes filled with hurt on Mikey and Mikey froze. " _Why_ would you just go back to Dogpound like that?"

“I didn't!” Mikey thought desperately as he blinked no. At least... he didn't by choice. He knew now that Dogpound had clicked the command to pee at a moment he'd been sleepy and unaware. All three of his brothers were there and on alert at the time and Mikey had trusted them to keep him safe like they continually promised so he hadn't even consciously noticed the command, just instinctively obeyed it like he'd been trained to do. That was it... He hung his head in shame. No wonder Master Hakuba had reported to Shredder that his training was going so well if he was instinctively responding without even realising he was doing it anymore. A chill ran down his shell and Mikey felt sick at the realisation.

Oh god... How... how had he got to that point? He'd only meant to co-operate enough so he didn't get hurt so often and could survive with his sanity intact. But... but... what if... what if it happened again? What if after they returned to New York and he was freed from the last of his shackles and was allowed to leave the lair and he responded to some random dog walker or... or... the Foot there knew all about his training and used him against his brothers by making him go to them. Tears filled Mikey's eyes at the terrifying thought. When he could 'talk' again, he totally had to get Donnie to help him.

If it was even possible by now...

... and if his brothers weren't so sickened by the thought of what he'd done that Donnie refused to help him or... or... worse... they abandoned him and threw him out.

"You went _right to him,_ Mikey!" Raph exploded while Mikey drowned in his fear. "You gave yourself over to that fucking arsehole instead of letting us know he was there! _Why didn't you tell us?_ We could have _protected_ you!"

He whipped his head up again to look at Raph in betrayal. ' _I didn't know!_ ' Mikey screamed helplessly in his head, frustrated, desperate and wishing like hell that he could make Raph understand but he couldn't. It was impossible. He began panting, struggling for air as panic began to rise. This wasn't fair! Why did Raph have to confront him with crap he couldn't physically answer when he _knew_ he couldn't! Why did Raph have to yell at him when he knew, they all knew it terrified him?

"You should have told us!" Raph shouted, forgetting in the heat of the moment how they had to keep quiet lest they attract unwanted attention. "You should have _warned_ us Dogpound was there! We all know how good you are at noticing shit now! You see, hear and smell things before the rest of us even have a chance to notice! For fuck's sake, Mikey! You pick things up before _Leo_!"

That did it. That was the straw that broke the turtle's shell. Raph reminding him of what a 'good dog' he'd become at the hands of the Foot. He wasn't a dog! He shook; _he wasn't!_ He was a mutant turtle. A sentient, thinking, breathing person! Human in nearly all ways but appearance and a few leftover turtle traits and instincts. Just like Raph! Just like Leo and Donnie! Mikey felt sick and he screamed wordlessly, soundlessly, at Raph. It wasn't his fault he'd been turned into this... this abomination. He fought them at every turn but he'd had no chance! No choice! His hands were taken away and replaced with useless, heavy paws, his legs all but crippled by braces designed to keep him down in conjunction with the metal weights encasing his hands and he was constantly kept in chains or a cage the entire time and occasionally drugged to suit their fancy. He was almost never even allowed off his leash when out of the kennel for fear he'd try to fight or run away, even though he was surrounded by enemies and the compound by a thick, deadly forest. The few times they did let him off the leash was when his training demanded it and the few times he did foolishly try to run, he was either remotely shocked or had the other dogs set on him to bring him down. Hell, even in his cage, his kennel as they called it, he was still often kept chained or muzzled. At least... he was when he had unwanted company... all in an effort to keep him from fighting back or even biting to fend them off. It had been impossible, yet a small voice deep down kept telling him the entire time that his brothers would have found a way...

Unlike him...

None of it was his fault and here was Raph all but calling him 'Good dog!' or.... rather 'Bad dog' since Raph believed he betrayed them...

_How could he?_

Who would ever actually _want_ to go back to any of that? Mikey wheezed frantically, what little breath he could get rasping and painful in his abused throat.

Suddenly he realised Leo and Donnie were up and in between them, Leo confronting Raph and Donnie crouching down to comfort Mikey and block Raph from view.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Raphael?" Donnie asked coldly, glancing up and behind even as he wrapped his arms around a still panting, hysterical Mikey who still couldn't get enough air and couldn't breathe!

"Trying to get some damn answers from him!" Raph retorted furiously as he fruitlessly attempted to step around Leonardo.

"You know he can't answer you," Leo stated, just as coldly as Donnie as he blocked Raph's path. "We all want to know the answers to those questions and more but right now isn't a good time to ask them! At least wait until he can talk to us again and then ask _calmly_! _Without_ the accusations!" he added sharply.

"He could talk to us just fine right now if he actually bothered to try! In fact, he just did a damn minute ago!" Raph spat, gesturing angrily at Mikey and making him quail behind Donnie in terror. "Or did you forget we've been able to lip-read since we were _ten_!"

"He's traumatised, Raphael! Ten months of constant torture and punishment for daring to act like the person he is? Ten months of being treated as an unthinking, uncomprehending animal!" Leo snapped furiously, getting in Raphael's face in an effort to distract him from Mikey. "You can't simply expect him to just mouth what he needs to say to us as if he could still talk! God, Raph! You saw how he reacted when he realised he simply _nodded_ the other day! He freaked out! Obviously terrified of being punished again! Thinking _we'd_ punish him for it! And that's not even taking into consideration the possibility that if they've done something to stop him from making noise that just trying itself would only add to the problem!”  
  
“But...”

“We're talking about _Mikey_ , Raph! The one among us who's never been able to keep silent, no matter the circumstances! How do you think he'd cope with even trying to mime speech right now, Raph? Huh? Did you think of that? God! I can only wonder what they did to him for trying and what that has to have done to him!"

"Mikey," Donnie said urgently as he tried desperately to hold onto Mikey, rubbing at his shell and pressing his forehead against his, "I need you to focus on me, not them."

But he couldn't!

Raph believed he betrayed them! Believed he deliberately handed himself over to that monster! His Alpha! His _nemesis!_

The thick metal collar around his neck felt as though it was constricting, clamping tighter into his throat and stopping him from getting the air he so desperately needed. He wobbled suddenly, only still on all fours because of Donnie's firm grip on him.

"Come on, Mikey, focus on me," Donnie insisted again, shifting to keep Mikey's face directly in front of his so he couldn't see their other brothers. "Breathe with me, Mikey. In... hold... and out. Come on, you can do it! In... hold... and out."

But he couldn't! His thoughts were whirling, his lungs burning!

"Master Splinter _died_ trying to protect him, Leo!" Raph cried out, his words breaking past Donnie and making Mikey blanch in pain.

That's right, his fault! They'd lost their father, the one constant in their lives and it was _all his fault_!

He'd known it was true the moment Donnie picked up the photo his Alpha tossed at their feet but to actually hear it spoken aloud! From one of his brothers, from Raph! He gasped painfully for air that still wouldn't come and black spots began to dance merrily before his eyes.

They blamed him and they were right to do so. So why did they bother to come rescue him again? He never asked them to. Not this time! Not the last. Well, he did ask them to while he was still in New York but after the ship left, he'd given up all hope on rescue knowing how dangerous and impossible it was. They should have just left him at that point. It was what he expected, what all logic and reason dictated given their circumstances. Not that he was at all logical or reasonable but the rest of his family was. Except for Raph anyway, but even Raph knew a lost cause when he saw it.

They shouldn't have come, he gasped uselessly. Their father wouldn't be dead if they hadn't and he would have been fine, having blissfully forgotten his old life by then as he had.

Raph wouldn't blame him or think he betrayed them if they'd just stayed home instead of stupidly risking their lives for someone as worthless and pathetic as him, a failed ninja who'd been taken by the enemy. In more ways than one!

Donnie's jaw was agape, his head turned in disbelief as he stared at Raph in shock and Leo was stunned to silence. Mikey used the chance to finally yank free of Donatello's octopus grip.

He had to get out of here! He couldn't stay with them but where could he go? He couldn't even open the door of this damn shipping container! The handle was simple enough to operate even with paws but with his vision dancing before him and his pounding head and other injuries, the weight of the metal was too much to reach up with. That and it was still daylight out there and he couldn't put his brothers in any more danger than he already had.

Gasping painfully, futilely, Mikey whipped his head around, looking for an escape. There was no escape but he needed to get away. He needed to... needed...

He couldn't escape but at least he could get out of their sight! Out of _Raph's_ sight.

He tore his way around past Donnie and wobbling alarmingly as if drunk, raced for the walled-off section of crates they'd built, leading to the one private area they had in this damn prison transport.

Leo gasped in disbelief, finally finding his voice again. "Master Splinter would have done the same for _any_ of us, Raph..."

" _M... Mikey?"_ Donnie called in panic.

Barely even hearing him over the blood rushing in his hearing, Mikey ignored his brother, focused on getting out of sight as fast as he could, his head pounding with a sick feeling pressure as the dizziness built exponentially.

"...and you _know_ it!" Leo cried.

"Yeah, I _know_ it," Raph spat furiously, "but that doesn't change the fact that Mikey threw Splinter's sacrifice away by turning himself in to that monster!"

Mikey stumbled and fell, gasping in vain for air. The collar! It was too tight. He couldn't swallow past it! He couldn't breathe! Weakly, he reached up with useless thick paws and scrabbled desperately at it, trying to pull it away enough to get a breath through. Just one. _Please_...

"L-Leo! LEO!" Donnie interrupted their brothers, his voice sharp with fear. "Get over here! _Now!_ "

"What's wrong, Donnie?"

"I need help getting Mikey out of here! He's not brea…"

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Honestly, I'm not totally happy with the beginning of the last scene. When I originally wrote it, it flowed a lot better but something went wrong and I lost the work I'd written. Then I had to write it all over again and even over the course of a year, I haven't been able to fix it to how it was originally. Well, to keep with my self-imposed posting schedule, I've run out of time and honestly, I'm sick of trying to fix that part so I'm sorry it's not quite up to my usual standard. I don't like posting things unless I'm happy with it but unless I want to put this on hold for I don't know how long, it's time to just post. If I ever work it out again, I'll fix it then but otherwise, what's done is done and it's not like I can just cut the scene altogether as what happened influences a lot of what's to come, including Mikey's own realisations.


	19. Chapter 19

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 19

It hurt to breathe. His head pounded worse than ever, he couldn't stop shivering and to top it all off, someone was gently caressing his forehead.

They were trying to wake him again and Mikey immediately stiffened. He couldn't help the silent whimper and hating himself for his weakness, found himself grateful he couldn't vocalise anymore.

The hand stilled but refused to leave his forehead. "Mikey?" a vaguely familiar voice softly ventured. Then, when he didn't respond, a small sigh sounded and the fingers on his skin started up again.

"Leo?"

Silence. Then the soft sound of someone standing and walking as only ninja training could instil.

"I thought he finally woke up, that's all," the first voice spoke tiredly.

The fingers on his forehead stiffened slightly as if the owner was fighting not to clench them, then relaxed and began their mock soothing motion once more.

"What happened?" the second voice, also achingly familiar, asked in weary curiosity, sounding as though they'd crouched down beside him.

It was all he could do not to scramble away but it wouldn't do him any good. It never did because even if he wasn't chained in place, he was in a small confined space where the doors were always locked when they came, preventing his escape.

And anyway, where could he go when he was constantly tracked and monitored?

Not to mention how much worse things became when he showed fear or distress...

There was no answer to the question but the hand drew away and he was certain whoever was tormenting him this time brought their head close to his from the faint warm breath on his face. Now he couldn't help but cringe. Why couldn't they ever just leave him alone?

"Open your eyes, Mikey," they asked desperately, the hand coming back to his forehead. "I know you're awake."

"Leo," the other one ventured carefully, "it might be better if you stopped..."

"Stopped what?" Leo asked, sounding confused. Mikey was confused too. Since when did anyone except Mai try to stop them but Mai only helped him when he was injured or sick. The rest of the time she hurt him too.

"Touching him, Leo. Mikey won't open his eyes because being touched distresses him."

His brothers! It was only his brothers. He was safe and with them, not back in his kennel being... He let out a slow, even breath of relief, hoping he wouldn't draw Leo's attention because he really wasn't ready to face them yet. Even if his brother was sure he was already awake...

"What are you talking about, Donnie?" Leo asked in a disbelieving tone, drawing his hand away regardless. "Mikey loves physical contact. He always has."

"Not always," Donnie said reluctantly. “Not anymore.”

"What do you mean? He's been fine with us helping him walk all this time,” Leo protested. “That involved being touched."

There was silence again and then Donnie continued. "That was different to this and...” silence for a few seconds more as if Donnie was struggling with what to say. “I've noticed he's fine when he knows it's coming but if he doesn't, well... he's had some pretty bad reactions. It makes me think..."

"Think what?" Leo asked, sharper than he meant to and causing Mikey to wince again.

"... That someone hurt him in more ways than the obvious," Donnie finally admitted in an extremely soft voice which Mikey heard regardless. One thing he'd discovered since being forced into silence was that he'd become so much better at listening since he wasn't drowning out the world around him with his own noise anymore. That and it was pure self-defence. Not that he could ever do much with the little forewarning he gained but that was beside the point. He reluctantly opened his eyes and stared at his brother, silently pleading with him not to say any more.

"What exactly are you saying, Don?" Leo asked, his voice hard as he stared Donnie down.

"If you are asking me to spell it out for you, Leo, I won't do that for two reasons."

"Which are?"

"One, I can't know for certain and two, you were right, Mikey is awake."

With that, the two older turtles turned to look down at him, Leo's expression softening. "Hey, little brother, how are you feeling?"

Embarrassed. Ashamed. Sickened.

Why did Donnie have to mention his suspicions to anyone, especially Leo? Mikey closed his expression off and with great effort flipped over onto his plastron so he wouldn't have to look at them anymore.

There was silence again for a moment before Donnie stood and moved around the mattress. "Please answer the question, Mikey," he commanded as he came into view again. "Are you in any pain or feeling sick?"

Knowing he couldn't get out of this, Mikey bit his lip a moment and then made a half-hearted face, sticking his tongue out.

"How badly?"

He blinked once and thought about it, then blinked four times before closing his eyes, trying to shut Donnie out.

"Leo, how was Mikey's temperature?" Donnie suddenly asked.

"A little warm but not too much."

"Okay," Donnie replied thoughtfully before getting up and shuffling around for a minute. Then, he came back. "Mikey, I'm going to help you to sit up to drink some water. Okay?"

'No,' Mikey tapped twice, unwilling to open his eyes and meet his brother's expectant gaze. The last thing he wanted was to be touched right now. Not after what just happened.

After what was just said...

"I'm afraid I have to insist," Donnie persisted stubbornly. "Leo and I are going to help you."

'No!' Mikey tapped again, this time more forcefully. But he knew that tone of Donnie's and that there was no arguing with him when he sounded like that so instead he struggled to push himself up, noticing for the first time since waking just how weak and shaky he felt. What had happened to him this time?

Sure, he still had that concussion which explained much of the pounding headache, not to mention all the bruising his Alpha left him with but that didn't explain how he felt right now. Anxiousness began to rise within as he struggled to remember and his eyes darted around the shipping container, searching. Suddenly, he realised that only Leo and Donnie were here, Raph wasn't but that didn't make sense. Raph might be a bit of an arse at times but he always hung around when he was sick or injured. Even when he was unsure what to do or how to help. The only times he didn't was when he felt responsible for whatever happened.

And that's when it all came flooding back.

 _"So then,_ why _do it?" Raph repeated, his voice strained as he fought to swallow the emotion in his voice. "Why'd you go back to Dogpound like that?"_

Mikey gasped and stumbled back.

_"You went right to him, Mikey!" Raph exploded without thinking. "You gave yourself over to that fucking arsehole instead of letting us know he was there! Why didn't you tell us?_

'No!' he blinked desperately, even as he screamed the word impotently in his head.

_"You should have told us!"_

But he couldn't have because he didn't know! He didn't know his Alpha was there!

 _"Master Splinter_ died _trying to protect him, Leo!"_

He couldn't breathe again. He floundered, desperately gasping for breath that wouldn't come.

"He's having another panic attack, Don. How do we calm him down if touching him caused this?" Leo asked urgently.

Donnie was silent a moment as he weighed their options. Then reluctantly, "I'm not so sure we can. We're going to have to use pressure points again."

-:-

Awareness dawned on him slowly, accompanied by the soothing sounds of his brothers softly talking nearby and the dull ache of bruises only a few days old.

Along with a growing sensation of dread he couldn't immediately explain.

Mikey blinked his eyes open to find himself staring at the ceiling once more and suppressing his shudder, groaned internally. They'd laid him on his shell again, just like every other time they'd knocked him out or he'd been hurt again. Years of training had long knocked the leftover instincts of discomfort from being on their shells out of them and it was only when they felt the most vulnerable that it ever even bothered them any more. He'd even long ago reached the point of being completely comfortable laying on his shell and upside down while reading or playing games. At least, until _she_ came along...

The chains he wore on the original journey to Japan hadn't helped. They'd made it impossible to get comfortable at all, let alone when on his shell but the true fear-inducing reality of being on his carapace didn't truly start until he found himself strapped down on that surgery table on a semi-regular basis.

Not ready to be up yet and wincing at the pull of the heavy paws from his uncomfortable position, Mikey struggled to lift his left arm and swing it over him so he could turn back onto his plastron, completely unaware he had an audience.

"You normally move around quite fast and easily even with those manacles, that seeing you have so much trouble lifting them now is surprising," Donnie observed quietly, making Mikey lift his head and whip it towards him in alarm at the sudden speech.

Seriously? Mikey gave Donnie a tired look of disbelief.

"So my question is, why?"

"Donnie?" Leo asked curiously.

"N-no, I understand that they're heavy, that's obviously half the point of them but Mikey has adjusted well enough to be able to cra… uh... walk and even somewhat run about on all fours rather well but then lifting them in other ways, holding them out, even low to the ground, obviously troubles him. I would like to know just why that is," Donnie explained patiently as he stood and walked over to Mikey, taking one of his paws in hand and studying it. "Didn't you ever work on trying to get used to lifting them in other ways, to make things easier for yourself?"

Mikey continued staring for a moment, then beginning to shake, stared down at the mattress in shame.

Donnie put his paw down and instead slipped a finger under his chin, trying to make Mikey look up at him. "Hey, it's okay, you don't need to feel bad about it or for anything else," he gently assured. "I just want to understand. The more I understand, the easier it will be for me to help you."

Did he really mean that? Even after the way he went back to his Alpha the way he had? Tentatively, he lifted his gaze to glance into Donnie's concerned, sincere one and blinked once before turning his head and staring. This time, up into the position where the camera had been before his brother removed it. He had no idea what Donnie had done with the thing since he'd dismantled it at a time Mikey was resting per Doctor Donnie's orders. He'd tried peeking a couple of times, only to be blocked by Leo and gently reminded he was injured and should be sleeping. Hah! Like that was possible when they were moving about. Every unexpected sound set him on edge, making it all but impossible to fall asleep.

Both Donnie and Leo followed his gaze, frowning in confusion. Suddenly, Donnie straightened.

"They were watching you through the camera in your shelter even when no one was actually with you!" he exclaimed excitedly. Mikey winced at the enthusiasm but his brother didn't mean that how it sounded, he always became excited whenever he realised or understood anything new. Then Donnie sobered in realisation. "You tried at first, didn't you."

'Yes,' Mikey blinked.

"And they punished you for it..."

'... Yes.'

"For trying to learn how to move with those things," Leo said, gritting his teeth in anger and disgust.

"For not acting like the dog they were trying to turn him into," Donnie corrected, his tone just as stiff, just as cold.

'Yes,' Mikey blinked again, suddenly unable to look at them again. Unconsciously, he hunched his shoulders, shrinking in on himself to make himself less of a target.

Donnie took a deep breath. "Alright, here's what we're going to do." Mikey managed to lift his gaze to look at Donnie again, taking a glance at Leo and seeing him smile reassuringly and nod in agreement. "Obviously I can't remove those shackles while we're stuck out at sea, so that will have to wait until we get home. I'm truly sorry about that, Mikey," Donnie added, his voice and expression crestfallen.

Mikey blinked once, he'd already known that.

"However, what we can do in the meantime is help you get used to actually walking and moving normally again..."

Mikey canted his head curiously.

"... Once those are off, you won't be able to walk properly immediately. You've been kept down and shackled for far too long," Donnie explained gently, "so Leo and preferably Raph..." Mikey looked around for their other brother but he was nowhere to be found and the chill already in his heart settled even deeper, "... will work with you to walk around for short periods several times a day while we're on this ship. That should help strengthen your muscles again for walking and at least make adjusting easier when the shackles finally come off."

'Okay,' Mikey blinked, trying not to let the disappointment at Raph's absence show on his face. He shouldn't be disappointed, not after what happened earlier. It was only to be expected that Raph wouldn't be anywhere to be seen. His brother probably hated him now and Mikey would bet had no idea of the part he was to play in Donnie's plans to help him. He just hoped Raph wouldn't resent Donnie too much for it.

"We're also going to work with you on you lifting your hands and arms in other ways other than what's needed for simply moving about," Donnie continued. He took a breath. "I know it will only be for another three weeks or so that you are stuck wearing those but again, once they're off, you will need to work on rehabilitation anyway and if we start now, it will be easier and faster then."

'Okay,' Mikey blinked again. Ugh... rehabilitation sucked. It was boring, it was frustrating and it hurt but... he wanted to be able to move properly again so much. Almost as much, if not more, than he wished he had his voice back. Besides, he had to do something to kill time while in this floating torture chamber. He stared down at where his hands lay inside their metal prisons and swallowed painfully past the tight collar flush against his throat.

"Do you have any space inside of those to at least flex your fingers?"

Not much... Mikey blinked yes regardless.

"That's good," Donnie smiled in relief as Mikey looked away again. “I want you to work on that while also working on the other exercises.”

None of that mattered though and he had no way to tell Donnie. Wasn't sure he could even if he had a voice and words.

"We're not going to start any of that for another day or two though as you need time to rest and heal. You still have that concussion and severe bruising at the very least. Not to mention, you're clearly still exhausted," Donnie added flatly. "We will, however, continue our practise of Morse Code before we start your rehabilitation. That is if you're up to it."

'Yes!' He was more than up to it! It was so hard but he needed it so much. Needed to be able to talk to them somehow, even if there were things he couldn't ever tell them.

"Good," Donnie's expression mellowed and Leo came closer to sit beside Mikey, offering a cup and helping him to drink. When they were done, Mikey rested his head tiredly on his brother's shoulder and Leo wrapped his arm around Mikey. Donnie smiled.

"I was going to get you to run through what we've already practised once before putting you to bed again but I think it can wait until after you've rested more," he said warmly.

Nope! No way! Mikey struggled upright again but maintained contact with Leo's arm as he reached away slightly with his left paw and tapped through the vowels, looking at Donnie expectantly.

Donnie chuckled, "Alright," and then quizzed him on the consonants he'd taught Mikey so far. Mikey struggled with the last batch he'd been taught but remembered the earlier couple of batches with some intense concentration. Donnie showed him the newer ones again, gently coaxing him when he stumbled over a couple, then insisted Mikey try to sleep some. Yawning, Mikey couldn't help but agree and Leo tried to lower him on his shell.

'No!' he blinked and tapped simultaneously.

"What's wrong, Mikey?" Leo asked, perplexed. "You agreed to try to sleep."

But not on his shell. He shuddered. Then struggled free of Leo's hold and slowly lowered himself onto his plastron, looking pleadingly up at his brothers as he did.

"You don't like lying on your shell anymore," Leo realised.

'No,' he blinked sleepily, he didn't.

"Alright, we won't put you on it again," Leo promised before Donnie could say otherwise, "but this is also something else we're going to have to work on in the future since we can't afford that kind of vulnerability in our lives."

Frowning, he looked up at Leo but Leo just looked back at him with that kind but stern expression he often directed at him when they were younger. The one proclaiming that he was the big brother and Mikey was the little and that therefore he'd always be there for him helping, even when he didn't want it, so sighing, Mikey blinked once then closed his eyes.

He really was very tired.

-:-

When Mikey awoke next, he still felt emotionally and physically wrung out but he felt a lot better than earlier. Donnie was asleep right on the far edge of the mattress next to him and Leo sitting up, leaning against the wall with his eyes closed as if feigning sleep. Mikey knew better. It was his brother's way to focus all his senses on his surroundings while cutting out the often misleading sight.

Careful of his aches and of disturbing his sleeping brother, Mikey slowly pushed his way up on all fours to head to the toilet. He wasn't surprised to see Leo's eyes snap open immediately.

"Good afternoon," Leo smiled gently. Mikey blinked back once, not having any appropriate response to give beyond simply acknowledging him. "Are you feeling better now?"

'Yes,' Mikey replied as he worked his wobbly way across the floor. He quickly disappeared from view, taking his time, before heading back out to where Leo awaited and leaning against him, seeking comfort.

"How's your head?"

Mikey thought and then tapped eight times. There was still a dull ache but overall, it wasn't too bad at the moment.

"That's good," Leo breathed in relief. "Thirsty?"

'Yes.'

"Okay, wait here a moment, I'll be right back," Leo promised.

Jealously, Mikey watched as Leonardo easily and gracefully rose to his feet and padded silently across the container to the crate where the water was stored. Leo took out a bottle, poured it into a cup and brought it back over where he helped Mikey drink once more. Then, once done, he settled beside him and Mikey leaned carefully onto Leo's shoulder again.

The two sat in comfortable silence for some time, with Leo gently rubbing Mikey's left arm, occasionally rubbing up against the bandanna that at some point had been replaced over the Foot Clan symbol branded into his arm. Mikey looked down at the bright red material with a painful swallow.

Having it there had been a comfort. Not just because it covered up that hateful mark showing the world he was 'owned' but it had also made him feel closer to Raph, made him feel just that little bit safer, even when they truly hadn't been. It proved he wasn't truly alone, even in the moments he needed or wanted privacy.

Now though, it only reminded him of the anger and disgust Raphael felt for his betrayal, whether he meant to betray them or not, and reminded him that he hadn't seen Raph since.

"What's wrong?" Leo asked softly, concerned.

Mikey swallowed uncomfortably again and looked up at Leo before gazing down at the red bandanna again. Then he leant forward and feigned looking all around the shipping container as if searching. For a moment, he tried lifting a single paw to sit flat above his eyes but it was too heavy and he couldn't lift it all the way. Still, it got the message across.

"You're wondering where Raphael is," Leo stated flatly, a faint hint of disapproval in his voice.

'Yes,' Mikey replied, twisting and looking up at his brother beseechingly. He tried to suppress the shudder at the fear he felt that Raph never wanted to see or have anything to do with him again.

"To tell the truth, Donnie and I have been wondering the same thing," Leo replied with a small, matter-of-fact smile meant to be reassuring. "You know what he's like when he lets his temper get the better of him. As soon as it was dark enough, he took off out onto the ship to clear his head. He didn't make it back before the sun rose so we won't see him until tonight."

Mikey's eyes widened in alarm and Leo chuckled.

"I'm sure he's fine. He's an insane, irresponsible hothead but he's not stupid." Leo hesitated a moment before adding, "Usually, at least. He'll be well hidden and hopefully, by the time he gets back, he'll have a much clearer head."

Mikey blinked once before looking down.

"Hey, you can stop blaming yourself for this because it's not your fault, Mikey," Leo said firmly, his voice soft to avoid disturbing Donnie, even though Donnie could easily sleep through an explosion – whether he caused it or not. "You know how Raph gets, probably better than any of us. He gets something in his head to worry or fret about but refuses to talk about it and instead stews on it for hours or days until it becomes too much and when he does finally let it out, he blows it completely out of proportion, usually hurting whoever is closest in the process. Raph was just scared because we lost you again and when he gets scared, well, you know how he covers up his fear with anger. He didn't mean any of what he said and he's sure to tell you that himself when he's able to come back."

Mikey snorted slightly. Most of what Leo said was true for sure but he wasn't so sure that was the case in this instance. Raphael tended to see things in terms of black and white and family or not, a betrayal was still a betrayal, whether it was intentional or not. Whether he knew Dogpound was there or not didn't matter, he had still subconsciously responded to his Alpha's command. He didn't like it, didn't want it, didn't even like thinking of the monster as such but it was true. He'd been completely unable to fight against him, unable to disobey.

He wasn't even aware of the commands half the time anymore, just immediately obeyed them because he'd been tired of the constant pain and humiliation.

He'd never thought help was coming or he might have fought the conditioning harder and by the time help actually came... it'd been far too late.

Mikey bit his lower lip as the shame overwhelmed him again.

"I know you can't have realised Dogpound was in the factory that night," Leo suddenly spoke again, breaking Mikey out of his reverie. He looked up in confusion. It was impossible to explain, he didn't have the words or the voice, he didn't even have all the letters yet so how could Leo know?

Leo smiled softly down at him and briefly squeezed him tighter to him.

"I know you, Mikey," he said quietly. "If you knew, even if you'd been unable to tell us, you would have had a look in your eyes telling us something was wrong. Your eyes are really expressive, you know? They always have been. How else do you think you've always been able to manipulate us so easily with just a look?" he chuckled fondly. "Anyway, we were in an enclosed space with no wind for Dogpound's scent to have travelled on, not to mention the place was full of sharp chemical smells. Then there's the fact that despite appearances to the contrary, Dogpound was a really good ninja, he could be extremely quiet when he made up his mind to be, even after his mutation. And on top of all that, you were half-asleep by then. I saw how attentive you were when I came back from scouting, good job, by the way, Mikey, but you completely relaxed once I joined the rest of you because you trusted us... trusted me... to keep you safe. So it's actually me who failed you, not you failing us or yourself and I'm really sorry for that."

What? Alarmed, Mikey pulled away enough so he could turn and really look up at Leo properly. 'No!' he protested, blinking frantically and tapping the ground twice for good measure. If only he could tell Leo how wrong he was, that it wasn't his fault at all. Because it wasn't and Leo needed to hear that but he couldn't.

Leo only smiled at him indulgently and continued, ignoring his wordless protests, "So you see, I know what happened wasn't your fault," he insisted firmly. "I don't know what exactly happened to make you go to him since I didn't hear anything and unfortunately that's not something you can explain right now but I do know it wasn't deliberate and you watch, when Raph returns, he's going to see things the same way as I do. I promise."

Mikey hesitated. Leo made a lot of sense but he still wasn't too sure when it came to Raph. However, the worst part of all this was that Leo wrongfully blamed himself. He didn't like it and wished he could tell Leo so. Although, he mused thoughtfully, Master Splinter always had said actions spoke louder than words so Mikey snuggled in closer to Leo, hoping that would at least convince his brother that he didn't blame him.

It wasn't the same as telling him it wasn't his fault but it was all he had and for now, it would have to do.

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, sorry, no Raphie in this chapter but I promise, he'll be back next chapter XD One thing's for sure though, Mikey's sure a better person than me. He's hurting so badly in so many ways and yet he's still thinking of others before himself.
> 
> Don't forget to let me know what you think of the chapter - anything good, bad, something I could improve :-)
> 
> EtA: Oh yes, a friend told me this story has been nominated in the TMNT 2020 Adult Fanfiction awards so I went and looked it up on a link she gave me ( https://affatmntfan.tumblr.com/post/641203594735058944/the-nominee-list-had-been-posted ) and it's been nominated under 2 categories:
> 
> BEST PORTRAYAL OF A TURTLE (Michelangelo)  
> and  
> BEST DARK PSYCHOLOGICAL OR HEARTBREAKING TRAGEDY
> 
> Thank you to whoever nominated me :-)


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raph finally comes back and tries to talk to Mikey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't update any of my stories last week. I wasn't really in a good headspace for it.
> 
> Happy Valentine's Day and Happy Lunar New year!

**How Much is that Turtle in the Window**

ch 20

Mikey yawned himself awake, feeling warm in a way that had nothing to do with the unpleasant stuffiness of the shipping container and looked up sharply to see what had disturbed him. To his surprise, it was to see Raphael slipping in through the door and closing it gently behind him. Mikey quickly closed his eyes again, snuggling deeper into Leonardo's protective hold as he pretended not to have been woken by his hotheaded brother's return.

Light footsteps made their way towards him, stopping seemingly directly in front. Mikey opened his eyes the tiniest of cracks to see emerald green feet just inches away.

"Hey," Raph said gruffly, "I know you're awake, Mikey. There's no way you didn't notice me coming in"

"He's exhausted, Raph," Donnie spoke up grimly from nearby, "It's been a very rough few days on top of an extremely rough number of months."

"Yeah, I get that, Don but I saw him looking at me when I closed the door."

An exhausted and slightly exasperated sigh sounded from across the room. "Do you have any idea how much you hurt him yesterday?"

"... Yeah... I get it..." Raph muttered unhappily. "And I didn't mean it like that."

"Don't tell it to me, tell it to Mikey," Donnie retorted testily.

"I'd love to but I want to be sure he's paying attention to me first because I'm not sure I have it in me to apologise more than once." Now it was Raph who sighed. "Not that I'd blame him if he doesn't want to hear it. Probably hates me after the horrible things I said and accused him of."

"You know, a year ago, I would have said Mikey didn't have the ability to hate," Donnie stated matter-of-factly, "though now, I'm not so sure..."

"Not helping, Don," Raph replied grumpily.

"I wasn't trying to help but my point is, I very much doubt he hates you."

"That's true, he's more scared that you hate him and will reject him," Leo murmured quietly.

Ugh great! Why'd Leo have to go tell Raph that? He already felt vulnerable enough!

"And unfortunately, I wasn't quite able to convince him otherwise when we talked earlier."

"He actually spoke?" Raph asked, his voice suddenly full of hope.

"Not in words, no," Leo admitted, his voice vibrating soothingly through his body and into Mikey's where he snuggled against his brother., "but it was pretty obvious what he wanted to say if you paid attention."

Raph sighed miserably and Mikey heard him drop to the ground in front of him with a small clunk. He peeked momentarily through slits in his eyelids again to see his brother staring at him with a guilty look on his face and his heart ached for him to open his eyes and reach out to Raph. Unfortunately, his head, on the other hand, screamed at him to keep away because Raphael would only reject him all over again.

"I'm not going anywhere until you open your eyes and listen to me, little brother," Raph said after a minute, his voice sounding hoarse and choked with emotion. "I don't expect you to forgive me or anything but I do want you to at least hear me out."

He couldn't. His heart and head were at war, preventing him from responding in any way. Leaving him laying safely in Leo's warm, protective embrace.

Raphael sighed miserably again. "Okay, well, like I said, I'm staying put until you're ready."

Everyone sat in silence for some time and then finally, Mikey heard Raph standing and moving away and his heart sped up at the realisation.

He knew it! His brother wasn't actually serious about trying to make things right. He was leaving again already! Mikey's fingers clenched in anguish within the metal paws and he stiffened slightly in Leonardo's arms even as Leonardo tightened his hold ever-so-slightly to comfort him.

Then he froze, frowning slightly as he heard a strange sound. A kind of wet, crisp slicing sound. Suddenly, a fresh delicious scent he barely recalled wafted under his nostrils and he couldn't help but salivate, his lips parting slightly. Then something sweet was partially pushed into his mouth and Mikey's eyes flew open in surprise and fright, only to see Raph grinning smugly in front of him, holding a bright red apple with a chunk cut out of it in his hands.

Mikey scowled at Raph's trickery even as he crunched at the delectable morsel, enjoying every burst of juice and flavour, all but moaning his enjoyment.

"Want more?" Raph questioned slyly.

Dammit but he did and his traitorous eyes couldn't help but blink their response, even as they stared at the fruit he hadn't seen or tasted in so long.

"Whatever you decide, it's all yours but I want you to at least listen to me, okay?"

Mikey sighed in defeat and blinked, watching the apple in his brother's hands as Raph cut free another slice and handed it to him.

"I'm really sorry, Mikey, I never meant to hurt or upset you," Raph finally said sadly as Mikey stopped chewing and swallowed, still unable to meet his brother's eyes. "I was only trying to understand what happened that night," he explained, chagrined. "You promised you'd stay with us no matter what and I knew it was difficult for you but the last couple of times we came across the Foot, you managed to fight your conditioning and stayed.”  
  
That was because he had one of his brothers directly by his side and touching or holding him! Reminding him physically that they were there and lending him their strength!   
  
“You walking away and back into Dogpound's possession that night really scared us, you know."

Wait, he scared them? Mikey lifted his head and stared at Raph incredulously. How the hell did Raph think he felt! He was terrified!

"I... I just wanted to know if you went back to him because you thought you were protecting us or some crap when we're the ones who are supposed to be protecting you. I... I never thought you actually betrayed us or anything stupid like that! I just... God..." Raph looked so pained, distraught even and Mikey felt sick both with anger at the sight of Raph's distress and with sadness at the sight of it, knowing that he'd caused that. Both that night and many others. "I-I drove you to another fucking panic attack..."

"Two actually," Donatello piped up snippishly from behind.

"Not helping, Don," Leo admonished softly.

"... and then when you collapsed, unable to breathe because of me... because of what _I_ said... Fuck! We could have lost you again but this time forever and all because of _my_ stupidity." Raph groaned and buried his head in his hands, self-loathing oozing thickly from his voice. "L-Leo told me once you were breathing again how you couldn't have known Dogpound was there at the time and yet I blamed you for not telling us. I-I'm so sorry, little brother!"

Really... Mikey stared at Raph coldly. Leo worked it out that early on? So why hadn't Raph known? Why hadn't he told them before then?

... Because while Leo was a master strategist, he thought his best on his feet...

Maybe he hadn't thought about it earlier, hadn't had time but Leo probably did what Leo did best and realised in the heat of the moment as Raph's accusations flew... Therefore Leo never had a chance to share his revelation beforehand... and as for Donnie, who knew what he thought. Donatello had a bad habit of not sharing until he was sure or pressed by others...

"And as for what I said about Splinter...” Raphael groaned again and sniffled slightly, “I shouldn't have ever said anything like that. Not to you, not to anyone and there's no excuse. I am so, so sorry, little bro."

The words all but splitting him open again at the reminder, Mikey froze again, eyes dropping to the floor. Hearing that out loud had hurt so badly but he'd already known it true. Whether he intended to or not he had thrown away their father's sacrifice and therefore his death was all his fault.

"Man, you have no idea how much we missed you, brat," Raph suddenly stated fondly, shoving away his vulnerable emotions and switching tack as he held out another slice of apple for Mikey to take. Trying not to give away how he felt and making his brother feel even guiltier, Mikey leant forward, biting to take hold of the peace offering, even with his stomach churning with nausea the way it was. "The sewers were way too quiet with you gone."

He stopped mid-chew and looked up, his heart beginning to race once more at the implication of Raph's expectations that things would return to normal once they were home.

But they couldn't.

He was too much of a mess after everything and he knew it. Then there was the fact that he couldn't even make a sound anymore. There was no possible way things could even approach normal again. Whatever normal was. Mikey had no idea any more.

"Hey, I don't just mean from your non-stop talking," Raph frowned, quick to explain at the deer-in-headlights-look on Mikey's face. "Even on the rare occasions you were quiet, you were still noisy what with your games, messing about in the kitchen experimenting with disgustingly weird food, Dr Prankentein, fidgeting when we were supposed to be meditating..." Raphael smiled as Mikey relaxed enough to chew his slice of apple again, "... even asleep, your presence has always screamed, 'I'm here, pay attention to me!'" He cut the last piece of the apple away and held it out for Mikey to take, then wiped the kunai off on his wrappings before putting it away and shifting closer. When Mikey didn't try to move away, he placed his arm around Mikey's shell, pulling him away from Leo and close to himself as he rubbed gently at it. "Yeah, I know you used to annoy us something fierce but it's how we knew you were there and everything was alright... When you were taken from us... Hell! Mikey, don't you ever get yourself captured again, okay?"

_He hadn't meant to get captured in the first place!_

Distraught and still trying to hide it, Mikey shifted slightly in Raph's hold so he could turn his head up, gaze flickering worriedly across Raph's face and he was surprised to see how much fierce sincerity and fear shone on his brother's face, even in the dim light of the shipping container.

Something shifted in Raph's expression and he suddenly burst out, "Promise me, Mikey! We couldn't take it if you ever disappeared again!"

"That's not a promise any of us can make, considering our lives," Donnie spoke up quietly from the sidelines, tiredly.

"I don't care!" Raph snapped, glaring across the room at Donnie before turning back to Mikey with a desperate, pleading look in his eyes. "Just promise me, Mikey!" he demanded. “Promise me you won't disappear on us again!”

Mikey's eyes widened as he stared, unsure how to answer when he couldn't.

"Raph..." Leo began in a warning tone. He reached out a supporting hand to rest on Mikey to ground him.

Mikey's lip quivered as his gaze fell. He wanted so much to do as Raph asked but Donnie was right. No one could promise something like that and especially not him. Not after the constant training and conditioning he'd been put through since he was taken - what happened the other night at the factory was proof of that - and he couldn't even promise to at least try since he had no words anymore.

No, that wasn't quite true, Donnie had been working so hard to help him. He still had a lot to learn yet but...

Mikey looked up seriously at Raph and tentatively reached out with a paw as he concentrated, {I tri} he tapped out slowly, hesitantly, on the metal floor, unsure if he was even doing it right.

"Uh..." Raph looked around the room, staring helplessly at their brothers. “What was that supposed to mean?”

Donnie was smiling broadly, proudly and Leo had a look of deep concentration on his face.

"I believe Mikey said he'd try but I think he spelt it wrong...?" Leo ventured carefully.

Mikey pulled a face. They always used to pick on him for his spelling so he shouldn't really be surprised at Leo now. Wasn't his fault this time though; he had no other choice.

"... I'm not sure, I'm still learning too so maybe I misunderstood?"

"You didn't, Leo," Donnie laughed quietly. "I haven't taught him 'y' yet. We still have eight more letters to go through before he's learnt the entire alphabet. Mikey's been limited by the fact that he has a concussion and needs to rest a lot, along with uh... other things but even so, he's been learning far faster than I expected."

"He has good reason to," Leo smiled warmly, shuffling over a space to where Mikey now leant tiredly against Raph, "right Mikey?"

{Hai, L,} Mikey tapped slowly, concentrating intensely once more.

"Now, I know you know your vowels, Mikey, so that's just being lazy," Leo chided with a muffled laugh once he translated the Morse.

Mikey stuck his tongue out, blowing a loud raspberry and jumped, startling himself by the loudest noise he'd made in a very long time.

Once his brothers stopped laughing at him, Donnie eyed him suspiciously, "Does this mean you're going to subject us to the Morse code equivalent of chat speak?"

They better believe it! 'Who, moi?' Mikey mimed, trying not to laugh too; his head was really beginning to hurt again.

"Great, just great..." Donnie muttered, pretending to be irritated. The hint of a smile on his face gave him away though. "He's found a whole new way to drive me up the wall, even while being unable to speak."

"And we'll all be grateful for it," Leo laughed, reaching up and rubbing at the top of Mikey's head as if giving him a noogie. At Donnie's immediate unimpressed look, Leo quickly reassured, "Don't worry, I'm being gentle!" he said, defensively.

Donnie snorted. "You better be! The last thing Mikey needs is his injuries exacerbated! And speaking of, Mikey, now that Raph's back and you've worked things out, back to bed!"

What? Why? Mikey looked pleadingly at Donnie. He was fine and enjoying the attention; for so long he'd missed it more than he ever would have thought possible.

"You're not okay," Donnie retorted tartly as if reading Mikey's mind. Then, more gently, "The effort of concentrating on those two brief sentences has clearly taken its toll on you, not to mention all the emotional upheaval you've been through since Raph came back."

Mikey scowled. It was way worse before Raph came back. For nearly a year in fact and Donnie hadn't worried too much about that before boarding the ship.

"Get some rest now for at least an hour and we can review the letters you already know and if you're ready and up to it, I'll teach you the next couple," Donnie quickly bargained. "Okay?"

Sighing in defeat, Mikey blinked yes and reluctantly pulled himself free from his brothers to make his way towards the stinky mattress. If only there was a way to get rid of his Alpha's scent faster he'd be a little happier about using it.

"How about I join you?" Raph offered softly, watching Mikey reluctantly walk away. "I didn't get any sleep out there so I could use the rest too."

'Yes,' Mikey blinked, almost slumping with relief at the suggestion.

"Before you join Mikey, Raph, I have to ask you about the apple," Leo spoke up sternly as Raph stood.

"Oh! Right! Sorry, I brought some back for the rest of us, too. They're by the door; help yourselves," Raph quickly offered.

"That's not what this is about," Leo frowned.

Mikey paused and looked back at Leo in trepidation. Why was he so upset about Raph's peace offering? Was it because Leo thought Raph used the apple to manipulate him?

Well, he did but if that was why Leo was annoyed, it was stupid because it was for him regardless of whether he accepted the apology or not. Raph only used it to get his attention because he was too afraid to look at him when he'd approached.

"Then what's it about?" Raph asked, an edge of belligerence seeping into his tone and body language. Mikey began to tremble at the quickly rising tension.

"It's about the fact that you took food that could be noticed!" Leo pointed out in that sanctimonious tone of his.

"No one's going to notice a few apples missing!" Raph barked with laughter. "Fuck, Leo! What do you take me for?"

Leo bristled and Mikey edged closer to the ground, moaning to himself. Why did they have to fight? Fighting meant anger and violence and that always meant he'd get hurt again! He was supposed to be safe with his brothers. They promised! Over and over again!

"An irresponsible, impulsive, hotheaded ninja who never stops to think before acting or reacting!" Leo snapped angrily.

"And who's not thinking now?" Donnie muttered, rolling his eyes in annoyance.

"Where did you get them?"

"The mess hall!" Raph snorted in disbelief. "In the middle of the night when most of the crew were asleep with only a skeleton crew manning the ship!"

"Are you kidding me? We're out at sea, Raphael! They keep inventory on food since they can't just stop off at a corner store to replace it! Look! It was a nice gesture to bring one back for Mikey but it was ill thought out, especially when you then brought back even more for the rest of us!"

"Perhaps this isn't the best time for this," Donnie snapped, stepping between their brothers and glaring them down from one to the other. He gestured toward Mikey hunkered on the floor near the mattress, shaking violently in terror from the poisonous words and tones being thrown about.

Leo baulked and Raph blanched.

"So might I suggest you keep your cockfight to yourselves! Somewhere away from our abused and frightened brother," Donnie hissed in a low tone.

"I'm sorry," Leo began with a worried glance at Mikey, "but..."

Raph snorted again. "Yeah, I'm going to stop you right there and set you straight, Leonardo! They leave a fucking fruit bowl out for the crew to help themselves to so no one is going to notice a few damn apples gone in the morning! They also leave bread and a toaster with spreads out at all hours! So thank you so much for your confidence in me! I'm going to bed!"

Whirling on his heel, Raph stalked towards Mikey. He crouched down beside him and reached out, falling short just shy of actually touching him. "Hey, little bro, it's okay. No one's going to hurt you and no one's fighting. You know how Lame-o-nardo is, always jumping to stupid conclusions when I'm involved."

Continuing to shake, Mikey buried his head deeper into his arms and curled in closer into himself; soft words after anger were never good either. He preferred the anger and the beating any day to the uncertainty of soft words where he never knew what was coming, when.

"... Mikey?" Raph ventured uncertainly. When Mikey wouldn't respond, he turned to look up at Donnie helplessly. "What do I do?"

"I'm not sure there is much you can do right now, other than being there like you promised," Donnie replied tiredly. "Give him some space, yet be close by for when he's ready."

"Great..." Raph muttered, plunking himself down on the metal ground beside Mikey, his shell making a small clunk as he did. "We weren't shouting and none of it was directed at Mikey so any idea what exactly brought this on?" He asked, his hand hovering mere inches from Mikey's shoulder.

Donnie shook his head sadly, watching as Mikey quivered in place. "None, today's effort was the first time he's even been able to 'talk' and you saw how much that took out of him. Beyond what little we saw and what we've been able to infer, none of us has any idea of any of what he's been through. Which means all we can do is watch how he reacts to things and try to behave accordingly since we have no idea what could set him off," he explained softly.

Leonardo shifted uncomfortably and looked at Raph with haunted eyes, "One thing we have learnt is to be careful not to touch him right now."

"Huh?"

"I uh... discovered the hard way earlier today that Mikey doesn't handle it well if he doesn't know it's coming."

"Really?" Raph said flatly. "You only just realised that?"

Leo and Donnie stared gape jawed at Raph in disbelief.

"Wait! When... when did you realise?" Donnie asked.

"Few days back," Raph shrugged. "That night outside the factory while Leo was scouting was when I knew for sure but I suspected a bit before that."

"And you didn't say anything?" Leo choked out in disbelief. "You didn't think it was something we needed to know?" His voice rose slightly and Mikey pulled in ever tighter on himself, hating himself for how he was acting when it was just his brothers and he was safe with them. Yet he just couldn't help himself and it was all he could do to keep the tears at bay.

"Sorry!" Raph rolled his eyes. "Didn't really have much chance between fighting for our lives and trying to get Mikey back again." He shrugged again. "Kinda had too much on our plates to even think about it since."

Leo sighed despondently, "That's true enough. I still wish one of you had said something sooner, even if it was just of suspicions but I understand. Even beforehand, we didn't really have time to stop and think with trying to put as much distance between us and the Foot as possible."

Donnie nodded guiltily.

"Don?"

He shook his head slowly. "Maybe I didn't realise until the other night but I should have thought of the likelihood sooner based on other evidence."

"That's the second time you've hinted at something today, Don. Care to share?"

_"Did they... did they hurt you?"_

No!

Still shaking, Mikey shot up and threw himself into Raph's arms, burying himself into his plastron for protection (and the hopes of Donnie being distracted enough not to extrapolate further).

Startled, Raph stared at Leo and Donnie for a moment, wondering what to do. Then tentatively, he wrapped his arms around his quivering brother before tightening his hold when Mikey somehow wriggled closer, desperately seeking protection.

"If Dogpound wasn't already dead, I swear I'd fucking kill that monster!"

-:-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to let me know what you think :-)

**Author's Note:**

> Comments, thoughts and concrit are always welcome. 
> 
> * If you ever see my stories posted anywhere other than under the name Zelgadis55 at Deviant Art, FFNet, AO3 or Live Journal, then they have been stolen. Please report them.


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